five movies selected for the first-ever all-Twitter film festival, "F This Movie Fest," have been announced! Are you excited yet? Please save the date -- Saturday, Feb. 4, starting at noon (CST) -- and join us for whole day of watching movies! Heaven is a place on earth! #fthismoviefest
Release date: May 16, 2012
I really like Wes Anderson, despite him being a Roman Polanski apologist (remember when Whoopi Goldberg saying "rape-rape" was a thing?). Rushmore was a transformative experience for me, and The Royal Tenenbaums is one of the best movies of the first decade of the new millennium. However, I was so disappointed with The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou that I skipped The Darjeeling Limited. Perhaps it's my fault -- perhaps I need to give The Life Aquatic ... another shot? Also, for what it's worth, I enjoyed Fantastic Mr. Fox, but don't get why every hipster totally sucked its schlong. I mean, yes, it was novel and fun and whimsical, but the best movie of the year? Um, 2009 was also the year Inglourious Basterds came out, so THINK AGAIN. Moonrise Kingdom looks like a pleasant return to form, with every shot looking like a beautifully composed photograph from the 1970s (which, unfortunately, also looks like those dopey "Instagram" retro stills that are popping up all over Facebook). The plot -- a pair of young lovers run away from their New England town, prompting a local search party to find them -- is also simple, charming, nostalgic and romantic. Long story short, I liked the way this preview made me feel. FINALLY, Bottle Rocket. There! I've done it! I've named all of Anderson's movies in a single post!
The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey
Release date: Dec. 14, 2012
Something-something Bilbo Baggins. Something-something Dwarf Kingdom of Erebor. Something-something Gandalf the Grey. Something-something Goblins, Orcs, Wargs, Smaug and Gollum. Something-something OSCAR GOLD.
Release date: April 13, 2012
This looks like yet another one of Robert Rodriguez's fake trailers (or am I just saying that because it stars Danny Trejo? Bigger question: AM I RACIST?). The sound and colors are off, the editing's weird, and Ron Perlman looks like Tom Waits. But, if Hobo with a Shotgun can be a major motion picture, I guess Bad Ass can too. Off topic, remember when the word "ass" was a swear? Now we have films titled Bad Ass, Kick Ass, Snatch, Meet the Fockers ... and the trailer above stars a main character whose first name rhymes with DILDO. As a kid, I remember feeling embarrassed around my parents every time a commercial for Robert Blake's Hell Town came on TV. Seriously! Then again, I'm sure my kids will feel the same way around me during promos for the 2030 TV series, "60 Fucking Minutes."
Release date: TBD
I have no words. So please post yours in the comment section! #dodougsjobforhim