The Wolverine
Release date: July 26, 2013
Mister-ah Wolverine-san. Look, this trailer isn't, like, the WORST (and this teaser from CinemaCon, which is basically an action sequence highlight reel, isn't THAT much better), but this particular characterization just feels tired and weak, especially compared to Joss Whedon's reimagined Avengers franchise. Time to hang up the claws, Hugh ... and then pee all over them.
Walking with Dinosaurs 3D
Release date: Dec. 20, 2013
"Dah-no-sawrs!" Fun fact: the length of time between the extinction of Stegosaurus and the emergence of Tyrannosaurus is greater than the length of time between the extinction of Tyrannosaurus and now. Your mind = BLOWN. Also, this movie, it looks like garbage.
Prince Avalanche
Release date: Aug. 9, 2013
Paul Rudd's gotta Paul Rudd. And Emile Hirsch? Well, let's just say his juice was worth the squeeze.
Twenty Feet from Stardom
Release date: TBA
I was going to write off this documentary as a needless expose into the lives of female backup singers, but then I watched the preview. Some of it really intrigued me. The music, the interviews with high-profile musicians, the archival footage. And then three singers from three different generations got together and sang "Lean On Me." And it seemed so hacky and trite. But what the hay? Maybe we need more fun-loving, optimistic documentaries out there, if only to serve as a counterweight to all the murder and AIDS and wrongly imprisoned teens in Tennessee.
Violet & Daisy
Release date: June 7, 2013
As you can tell, it's a ridiculously light week for trailerz. So let's end on a high(?) note, shall we? Rory and Hanna play assassins, and they're hunting Tony Soprano! Written and directed by Geoffrey Fletcher, the dude who wrote (and won an Oscar for) Precious, the last half of the trailer really feels like he's pulling out all the artistic stops. This has been sitting on a shelf for a while, and that's a shame, because it looks pretty interesting.
"Violet & Daisy" looks awesome for a two-year old shelved project. I love tonal-duality juxtaposition when it's done right, and anything with Gandolfini and Trejo in it (plus a grown-up Saoirse Ronan) can't be a total waste. Patrick has rightfully noticed some idiosyncrasies between Lee Daniels' two movies, "Shadowboxer" and "Precious," that drag the latter down in his opinion. But Geoffrey Fletcher is debuting here as a director and seems to be going for broke. It might be a case of the trailer packing cool visuals masking a shallow movie, but "Violet & Daisy" stands out from the pack.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry, I'm too busy picking up the pieces of my blown mind over that dino fact to comment on this post. You sure made a mess here.
ReplyDeleteI just typed out a creationism joke about how the earth is only about 5000 years old and so that stegosaurus bit is nonsense, but even joking about it felt douchey. So instead of joking about it, I've written about HOW I didn't joke about it, which is only slightly less douchey.
ReplyDeleteI think that documentary on backup singers looks cool. Will Mick Jagger tell us how many of them he nailed? And not just the women, either, but the men and even the mic stands he molested.
I'm convinced that if The Wolverine had been made when I was 13 then it would be my favorite movie ever. It feels weird to say, but I'm not the audience for that anymore. I mean, I'm still going to dress up and tape pencils to the back of my hand and go see it. But that movie looks like it was made for tweens.
Come on Doug, Don't you know that Yahweh created the earth 5000 years ago, and that Jesus's great great great great maternal grandmother would race stegosauruses against Tyrannosauruses on the weekend. So your comment is nonsenses. Praise be Allah!
ReplyDelete#BradL:OnlyslightlymoredouchythanHHH