Wednesday, June 24, 2015

Junesploitation Day 24: Teenagers!

We are the future...stop us if you can!

63 comments:

  1. ATTACK THE BLOCK (2011)
    I'm gonna go ahead and say this counts because, simply put, I wanna watch it right now.

    This movie is AMAZING, truly. It's so damned entertaining it's a good thing being so isn't a crime -- this flick would be serving five consecutive life sentences.

    And (speaking of crimes) WHY hasn't Joe Cornish made a follow up to this remarkable debut yet? We need more genre movies like this, made with love and care and undeniable joy.

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    1. There was a good second where we were gonna get a Joe Cornish Star Trek 3. I would have liked to see that.

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    2. I love this movie! There is only way I ever say po po again.

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    3. Sad that he wasted so much time developing Ant-Man, only to part ways with Marvel right before the production should have been started.

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    4. Yay! I love this movie so much. It is so cool it is filmed in some places I know but try not to go to too often. And takes place on Guy Fawkes too! Very English and very cool!

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  2. Eckhart Schmidt’s DER FAN, aka THE FAN (1982, 94 min.) on Mondo Macabro Red Case Limited Edition Blu-ray for the first time.

    17 year old Simone (Désirée Nosbusch in a mesmerizing performance) is obsessed with her favorite pop idol, “R” (real life West German 80’s rocker Bodo Steiger, whose band Rheingold supplies the peppy electronic soundtrack), to the point that school, her parents, other boys and the rest of the world become background noise. When her many fan letters go unanswered (‘Day 1… Day 6…’) Simone hitchhikes her way to Munich to try and catch “R” during a TV appearance. By the movie’s final act (which I won’t dare spoil here) it delves into an upcoming Junesploitation category that I didn’t see coming. Immovable object, meet train… BLAM!

    If Kubrick had slummed in the early 80’s directing a stylized psychosexual teen horror drama it would look and feel a lot like this. Every frame of “Der Fan” is like a carefully-composed still photograph, and seldom has nudity from an attractive teenager (which the then-16 year old actress tried to block in court and failed… #WhathefuckiswrongwithGermansploitation!) been so simultaneously erotic and off-putting. Désirée internalizes Simone’s emotions so tightly you don’t realize she has any until they all pour out at once; Steiger’s too-cool-for-the-room, Devo-inspired “R” persona becomes the unintended trigger for the couple’s eventual, “In the Realm of the Senses”-type undoing. Too explicit for the mainstream, too tame for the grindhouse market and not esoteric-enough for the arthouse crowd, “Der Fan” is a time capsule of teenage fandom run amok taken to its ultimate, overly fantastic extreme. Best blind buy since I bought a theater ticket to see “Possession” back in 2011, and another Junesploitation ’15 highlight.

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  3. Return to Nuke 'Em High Volume 1 (2013)

    After this post, I'm going to kill myself.

    Calm down. I'm just quoting the movie...sort of. This is the kind of humor you get with Return to Nuke Em High and you know what...I'm okay with it. It's Troma and they just do not give a fuck. The movie begins with a dick being cut off so this time they are taking the high road. I've seen a few Troma movies and for the most part did not care for them. I don't know why but for this one, I was on board. I put on my 16 year old cap and said "show me them titties!" I apologize for the vulgarity but I just saw a girl grow a humungous dick and hit people with it. This shit is bananas but best Troma so far. I'm turning a corner and around that corner...it's fucking disgusting.

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  4. Class of 1984 (1982)

    Clearly looking dated today, but still working very good, this one is a movie I watched endlessly in the mid-eighties. And rewatching it, I still like it.
    The story is straightforward, writer/director Mark L. Lester holds a good pace and the acting is good (watch out for young Michael J. Fox), especially from Perry King, Roddy McDowall and Timothy van Patten as the leader of the gang who terrorizes the school. Especially van Pattens character Peter Stegman is someone to hate right from the beginning. He´s a clever manipulator and pulls the strings very well until Perry Kings characters snaps and strikes back, ending in a very brutal and bloody finale.
    Together with "Commando", this is Lester`s best movie.

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  5. Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)

    Another ticked off my long movie shame list. I enjoyed way more than I thought I would. I loved how much of a spunky teen Nancy was (more so than other slashers I have seen). Oh Mother.

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    1. This is in my top five favourite horror films. If you are a nerd like me you might like seeing all the strange weavings such as the Hamlet in there when you see it on repeated viewings!

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    2. I will definitely have to watch it again!!!

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    3. I will definitely have to watch it again!!!

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  6. Cruel Intentions 1999

    This is actually my first time watching this movie as i actively avoided a lot of the 90's teen flicks. Basically this is rich kids playing rich kid games. In any case Sarah Michelle Gellar is hot in this movie. Also it reminds me of how much I hate the song Bittersweet Symphony and how at one point it seem like it was in every movie.

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  7. Blackboard Jungle (1955, dir. Richard Brooks) (First Time Viewing): Totally unnecessary remake of Dangerous Minds with Glenn Ford in the Michelle Pfeiffer role. Then replace Coolio’s “Gangsta’s Paradise” with “Rock around the Clock” and you have Blackboard Jungle. This is the problem with Hollywood these days, why mess with the perfection that is Dangerous Minds? All kidding aside, I thought this was really good. Vic Morrow is especially terrifying as the lead juvenile delinquent. The classroom scenes are still super-intense 60 years later. Really glad I saw this.

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  8. The Last American Virgin (1982)

    First of all, thank you to all the other F-Heads who watched this and warned everyone about the ending without actually spoiling the ending, that's very much appreciated. Even going in expecting the ending to be bleak it's still a total gut-punch.

    Up until that thoroughly tone-deaf last act it was a mostly decent movie, not great but there were a few chuckles and some terrific music. I liked future-Jason-Voorhees-fodder Lawrence Monoson in the lead, he was kind of endearingly gawky and seemed like an actual human being, which is a rarity in these sexploitative comedies. I'm curious now to see Lemon Popsicle, the Israeli movie (turned series of movies) on which this was based.

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  9. Zapped (1982) - my god, how much cocaine was Scott baio and Willie Aames on when they came up with this classic.

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  10. Sleepaway Camp (1983) - First and second viewing

    So I watched the movie twice, the second time with the FTM commentary. That might have been my favorite thing this month. And I've watched Starcrash, Ninja III and Secret Agent 00 Soul!

    Crazy movie, hilarious commentary. So thanks for that Patrick, Doug, JB and Mike!

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  11. PORKY’S (1981)

    Somehow, my hazy memory forgot that this was a period piece, set in the ‘50s. With that in mind, it makes more sense both this and A CHRISTMAS STORY were directed by Bob Clark. Clearly he was on a big “nostalgia movie” run at the time, and he applied the nostalgia trappings of PORKY'S to much better use for Ralphie and his BB gun. That aside, this movie is just as trashy as I remembered. I feel like Porky is actually the hero, just trying to make an honest buck while constantly under attack by a bunch of evil rapey teenagers.

    Accompanying short film: REO Speedwagon’s I DO’ WANNA KNOW music video. A teen punk terrorizes his family and is punished accordingly. From the days when videos were more about making you laugh than making the band look cool.

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    1. In My Mind the hole in the shower and what happens was hilarious but that could just be nostalgia, its been twenty years at least

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    2. I thought it looked more horrific than funny, actually. Like something out of SAW.

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    3. Oooh dear, torture porn ;)

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  12. BMX Bandits (1983)

    Three bike riding teenagers are on the run from a group of bumbling bank robbers after they unknowingly take a box police scanner/walkie talkies that the robbers planned to use in a heist. Nine year old me would have loved this movie. It's harmless 80's goofiness. Adult me was bummed out that there wasn't more BMX riding and tricks. I'm a big fan of the movie "Rad," and I was hoping this would be along the lines of something like that. But here, so much time is spent on the kids vs. crooks plot that the bike riding is treated like an afterthought. Also, some of the editing in this is really bad. There are two sequences of the kids running from the bad guys, and each goes on for way too long.

    A movie kids might like, but one that I don't ever need to revisit.

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    1. I actually saw this in a movie theater when I was a kid, the only Brian Trenchard-Smith film I've seen projected, and you're right that as a kid it registered with me. Who knew then that 16 year-old Nicole Kidman (Judy) would be breakout star of the piece, and that only six short years later she'd be doing "Dead Calm" and being chosen by Xenu to be Tom Cruise's wife. ;-)

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    2. The Goonies vs. BMX Bandits. Go.

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  13. Terrifying Girls' High School: Lynch Law Classroom (1973, Noribumi Suzuki)

    A brilliant premise marred by predictable hypocrisy. Tensions crescendo at a corrupt, oppressive school for girls, erupting in violence and momentary revolution. The film is full of indelible moments. Villains wearing bright red surgical masks. "The Boss with the Cross." A rival gang leader bursting into a classroom, shoving the teacher away from the podium to ceremoniously explain her lineage and then challenge another gang leader to a duel, creating a surreal mixture of anachronistic formality with contemporary teen styles. A climax that fatalistically recalls student protests of the 1960s. The unexpectedly hilarious final freeze frame.

    Unfortunately, in between these moments is a movie that conflates titillation with sexual violence, positioning us to identify with the women's oppressors but without the ambivalence and political anger someone like Nagisa Oshima brings to similar content. At one point a politician is exposed for his corruption and moral debasement, but in an earlier scene the movie lingers on his sexual activity, reveling in female nudity and his delirious debauchery. With a finer hand these two moments could have complimented one another, forcing the audience to confront their own place in perpetuating patriarchal structures of female exploitation. Here, it feels like two different directors.

    Probably one of the best film titles of all time, though.

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    1. I always liked "Chopper Chicks in Zombie Town" as my favourite title, I've never heard of your film, Nice Deep cut, Good Work

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    2. there's an old dvd box set of toei pinky violence films and almost all of them have great titles. this one, Girl Boss Guerilla and i think Stray Cat Rock: Sex Hunter were all in there.

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  14. Snowballing (1984) Dir. Charles E. Sellier Jr. (Silent Night, Deadly Night)

    Let me just say that I'm a sucker for movies that involve snow, I love them. I've been curious about this movie because it's marketed as a teenage sex comedy but it's rated PG. It involves a group of high school kids (who are all mostly 20 somethings) taking a trip to a ski resort. Mary Beth McDonough (Erin from The Waltons) is our leading lady and one of our main "wacky" teens is the kid that Venkman is torturing in the beginning of Ghostbusters.

    This would probably be PG-13 today due to an almost full boob shot and an odd, out of place prostitute who works at the resort but it would fail as it's mostly too silly and tame. There's at least 4 music montages, a great scene at a dance and a "Raiders of the Lost Ark" parody with a giant snowball. The end theme song is the best! "Slippin' and sliding', going down and down and down and down. Ohhhhhh...I'm fallin' in love, Ohhhhhh....I'm snowballin', I'm snowballin'." Amazing.

    Overall it's a nice piece of nostalgia but not as fun as it should have been.

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    1. I want Snowsploitation to have its own day next year.

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    2. I'm taking away all the wrong lessons because I really want to see this.

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    3. It's worth seeing. If anything, it adds to being a completest of snow-themed teen sex movies from the 80's.

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    4. Between "Snowballing' and "Silent Night Deadly Night" '84 was a banner year for Sellier Jr.

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    5. This sounds terrible. I want to watch it IMMEDIATELY.

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  15. I did 3, because they're all just... hilarious to me.

    Airborne (1993) Shane Mcdermott plays a California surfer who moves to Ohio for school and brings his... rollerblades with him!
    Rad (1986) Cru Jones wants to win a BMX tournament so badly that he has a weird BMX slow dance with Lori Laughlin
    Thrashin' (1986) Josh Brolin plays the lead character in the "Romeo and Juliet meets skateboarding" combo.

    I chose comedies again, because well... Lords of Dogtown will probably be watched on another day.

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    1. These are amazing picks and all worth revisiting. Aaah...memories.

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    2. Awesome choices, Hook and the Daggers, and seeing Pamela Gidley when I was sixteen...... :)

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    3. Could there be a greater 80s triple feature?

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  16. Adventureland (2008)

    I think these characters are in their very early 20's but they work at an amusement park for fucks sake. Kristen Stewart was 18 when she made this and she is incredible. I had friends single her out as the thing they didn't like about this movie. That's crazy talk. I guess it helps to not have seen her Twilight output. The amusement park atmosphere is incredibly romantic to me and helps tell a story that is light on plot in the best Linklaterian kind of way. This movie is sneaking up on me as an all time favorite.

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  17. Born Innocent (1974, dir. Donald Wrye)

    This was just wonderful! It was made for TV, but it's better than most Women in Prison movies. 14-year old Linda Blair is put in a reform school when she runs away from home one time too many. All the WIP archetypes are there, but they're all teenagers! Linda starts out naive and sweet, but is a hardened con-in-training by the end. She even instigates a riot when the house mother won't give any shampoo! An excellent chunk of the movie is about her going home for a visit, where it's main painfully clear that her insane dad (Richard Jaeckel) is the cause of all her problems, but that she's completely trapped. The movie is very morally ambiguous, and the ending is boldly downbeat without having to go overdramatic. Recommended! Trailer.

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  18. DETENTION (2011)
    We don't need no education.

    I LOVE THIS MOVIE. I know some don't -- as in, they despise it. There seems to be no in-between.

    Love it or hate it, there's not really another movie like it. That, at least, is an accomplishment.

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  19. The Lost Boys (1987)
    Teenagers who never grow out of the angsty phase, and who'll eat you if you piss them off.
    Only my second viewing of the film, and this time I decided to just enjoy myself instead of letting out my own inner quibbler. Okay, so I fast forwarded through some of the Frog Brothers stuff, but nonetheless had a really good time, and Barnard Hughes is in the movie just the perfect amount to steal it. My advice is to sit back and let the '80s wash over you.

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  20. Thirteen (2003)

    This movie seemed truly "edgy" when it was released in 2003. It lacks some of that punch now, but it still holds up as a story of one girl's (rocky) journey out of childhood via drugs, sex, and piercings. Evan and Nikki give superb performances and Catherine's style fits perfectly.

    Next up: Heavenly Creatures (that counts, right?)

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    1. This movie does still have a great punch though due to the style and performances as you say! I think it does teenagers much more credit than a lot of movies do and that still feels fresh :)

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    2. I agree that it does still "pack a punch" and agree that the performances are one of the reasons. The fact that Nikki co-wrote the film based on her experiences helps give the film a really authentic voice as well.

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  21. Class of 1984 (1982)

    This movie had me questioning all sorts of things about myself. It had me asking for blood, and once it gave it to me I'm not so sure what to think. It's pretty well acted all around (shoutout to super young Michael J Fox) and the fashion style is just great.

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    1. I watched this earlier in the month and had forgotten how entertaining it is. But you're right -- when the violence really starts in the last act, it turns totally crazy. I'm not sure Perry King's response is proportionate.

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  22. Picture This: Somehow this ended up being the film that looked like it could be on in the background as I assembled my new bed. This was just awful though and I think way off bawlanave for someone produced by Tisdale at 23, who must have much more interesting and resonant things to say about being a young woman than this.

    Idle Hands: I feel this had some dynamics that if this was shorter and produced by full moon it would have been pretty cool. But this one feels tired and lagging.

    The Sure Thing: Oh thank god! Why hadn't I watched this before? Great romance, a great spirit taken from inspiration from It happened one night rather than a remake. Very comforting and elevating, much needed!

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  23. Full Moon High (1981)

    I went into this movie blind, only seeing the picture of a werewolf wearing a letterman jacket and a woman chasing him and I figured what the hell. I think this was supposed to be a parody of werewolf movies but alas makes a lot of jokes that seemingly have to do nothing with werewolf movies. The cast is legitimately trying with Adam Arkin in the lead. His dad Alan "you look like a hood ornament " Arkin shows up later in the film and does get some laughs in as a doctor who shames people at everything but by that point it's too little too late for me. Positive points though for one of the best newspaper headlines I've seen in a while "werewolf annoys community".

    8 word review (in preparation for SMM)

    "Silver Bullet's werewolf is still the worst werewolf"

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  24. An American Werewolf in London (1981)

    Ok. So I'm not sure whether or not this TECHNICALLY counts as "teenagers," but according to the DVD case David is a young college student, so we really don't know if he's in his late teens or early twenties. For the sake of Junesploitation, I'm just gonna assume he's 19. So, An American Werewolf in London. First of all, the make-up is incredible obviously. I liked the movie, but the biggest problem I thought it had was the very sudden tonal shifts. Was the movie ever super funny? No. But funny enough to be entertaining throughout? Absolutely. Same with the horror. But neither mesh that well with each other. I enjoyed all of the performances (except the the people in "The Slaughtered Lamb," but I think that that had as much to do with the writing as the acting), and I liked most of the musical cues. The end though... didn't work that well. It was relatively sudden and really left me cold. That again, is a tonal issue. It absolutely could have worked, but what came before didn't lead to the end at all. I did like the movie though.

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    1. I´m feeling the same about "AAWIL".
      The tone was very wonky, sometimes great, sometimes plodding along without that much to say.
      Rick Bakers transformation is still the best thing next to the dream in a dream.
      To me the better werewolf movie from that year is still "The howling", with a transformation by Rob Bottin, that was way scarier than the one from Mr. Baker.

      But "The howling" has no teenagers in it, so it doesn`t count here.

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  25. Revenge of the Cheerleaders (1976, dir. Richard Lerner)

    I have a hard time believing there was a single moment of this production during which the cast and crew weren't on a lot of drugs. Sexploitation comedy starts as a soft core romp (featuring a particular sex act I don't think I've ever seen on screen before) and by the end is some sort of action chase movie. There are probably only 10 scenes in the whole film and each one goes on FOREVER, including multiple dance numbers that are chaotic but fun. The girls are adorable (especially Rainbeaux Smith) and this is the second movie I've seen this month to feature David Hasselhoff. He seems high the whole time. He does a dance that I know for a fact Doug loves and has imitated for years.

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    1. It's Thursday in Australia and I'm at work....but I just watched the Hasselhoff dance you linked above. I don't know what I just saw but I love it.

      This is why Junesploitation is necessary...not optional.

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  26. Clueless (1995)

    After listening to the podcast earlier I had to watch this. I basically grew up watching this movie and appreciate it for different reasons at different points in my life. I love it.

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  27. THE LAST STARFIGHTER (1984)
    Yes, Grig & Centauri, but for me the main characters are really Alex and Maggie, so I get to watch 80s Catherine Mary Stewart (win-win when you consider the movie is quality, too).

    One of those special flicks from the Summer of '84...which was life-changing for me.

    A fun script, appealing performances, fantastic score (coulda used a better villain, but it still works) -- I love this movie.

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    1. Right, fantastic score which became the first CD I owned....months before I bought my first CD player.

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  28. The Monster Squad 1987

    You know who to call when you have Ghosts, but who do you call when you have Monsters?

    I never really need much of a push to rewatch this or Night of the Creeps, Fred Dekker we miss you!
    This I think is a site favourite, it cuts across some many tropes I love and the film is made from love, even when the young girl is called b#### it is not offensive, I just love this movie

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  29. Return to Nuke 'Em High Volume 1 (2013)

    I had a lot of fun with this and I definitely smell what the Kauf is cookin - it's more dumb than smart but I'm a sucker for the gross-out practical effects - will have to go back and check out Patrick's interview with some of the stars.

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  30. The Last American Virgin (1982) (first time viewing)

    Well, that took a complete 180.....wtf?

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  31. Born Innocent (1974)

    Interesting to see what Linda Blair followed up the enormous success of The Exorcist with. Doesn't really rise above standard TV movie fare but I appreciate its willingness to have a downbeat ending.

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