Tuesday, February 23, 2016

F This Movie! Episode 23: Worst Moviegoing Experiences

Patrick and Doug almost die for Tupac.


  1. Nice shirt! Yeah, unfortunately I am one of those that it now takes a lot to get me to a theater and when I do go, I catch the earliest showing possible. I just grew tired of all of the distractions and rude people and I don't enjoy the experience anymore. There are exceptions of course as I really want to catch The Witch in the theater and I caught Krampus last year to a surprisingly packed theater of quietness.

  2. Hey - a video - awesome! And nice shirt, indeed! Also, Patrick, I note your moustache seems a little bushier than normal - I've never had the courage to go full over-the-lip with mine - how's that working out for you? Maybe you'd like to contribute to my new website, "F This Moustache" (warning: extremely NSFW as it's turned out).

    Wow, now THAT's a bad movie experience, I'd be amazed to see it get topped. Other than being vaguely uncomfortable at every movie because I'm worried someone is just systematically murdering everyone in the rows behind me and my throat could be slit at any moment, I seem to have it pretty good here in small-city Canada. The worst experience I can remember recently is watching Guardians of the Galaxy with a family behind me enjoying the movie too much, laughing uproariously at the worst jokes (and not at the best ones) while trying to beat Groot to the punch by saying "I am Groot" first with about 50% accuracy at best.

    But yeah, I agree, the theatre experience is still very worthwhile and seeing something with a crowd always seems to amplify my emotional reaction.

  3. This kinda counts as it was recent and it still hurts as my biggest Let down. I went to Florida recently for a holiday and who can think of anything better than seeing the Hatefull 8 on 70mm while I was there?
    I checked out the roadshow, checked the website, choose a Theatre on the list, booked a hotel in that area, all was planned for a perfect Sunday once in a lifetime movie going experience, QT in 70mm with the intermission, I was soo excited!
    Here comes the Bomb! "Sorry Sir, we only had the film on 70mm for two weeks, we only have regular showings now,"
    It still hurts now, I never felt so excited and then so gutted, totally sickening...
    Cheers for the Video, We love Doug and also nice Evil Dead edit at the end made me smile

  4. Wonderful, but after all terrifying...

  5. What a disaster! Great to have a new video. My worst experience was the Friday night premiere of Darkness Falls. It was our first PG-13 movie on our own, and I must say that my friend and I were very excited.

    As we walked down the hall and approached the auditorium, we could already hear the roar of the people inside. The theater was packed to near capacity with high school kids. We were lucky to sit next to each other.

    From the moment the movie started to the moment it ended, nearly every person there was having conversations with each other. To make matters worse there was a group of people at the back of the theater shouting insults to a group of people at the front of the theater. This lasted the whole damn movie. I don't know how a fight didn't break out. And all the while, an older gentleman sitting directly behind us kept shouting at both groups to "shut the fuck up!"

    It was a terrible experience, but one I'll never forget. I don't go to movies on opening night anymore...

  6. Yay, another video!

    I've actually been quite lucky with movie going experiences so far. The worst I can think of at the top of my head was during Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs 2, I had two kids right behind me. This was clearly not their first time seeing the movie as they kept reciting the lines a second before they were said on screen. But ultimately, a) their excitement was endearing and b) it was only Cloudy with a Chance of Metaballs 2.

    I saw The Hateful Eight this year and had a group of 14-15 year olds in the back row who were clearly unable to internally process what was going on. They kept yelling out obnoxiously during the gory bits (AWW, NO!) and cheering loudly whenever JJL was hit in the face.

    The worst though is Girl with a Dragon Tattoo. I hadn't read the book before seeing the movie, and the first time a certain character appears on screen someone in the audience yelled out "that's the killer". Major party pooper.

    Still I love going to the movies - they're like my place of worship.

  7. Years ago my sister and I decided that it had been too long since we both enjoyed a movie going experience together at a theater and decided on "Fun with Dick and Jane" as the movie we would view that night. Our movie choice was obviously a harbinger of things to come. We get there, grab our tickets and sit down for some Fun with Dick and Jane. Twenty minutes in and we already know its your standard, run of the mill Jim Carrey comedy with all the familiar beats, and figure this was it for the excitement for the evening. Thirty minutes in and obviously the audience isn't impressed either, as, the sound of children's feet running up and down the theater stairs is heard. This continues for another few minutes when yells are heard from the back, such as "make your kid sit down" and "he's only seven years old." It became tense quickly, we heard someone shove someone else, a scuffle took place and all hell broke loose. A young woman ran for security as my sister and I bolted out of the theater. Running past the security guards I hear one of them ask "are they involved?" The girl yelled back that we weren't and on we went. We got ticket voucher's for a future movie of our choice. We ended up seeing Running Scared with the late Paul Walker. A better movie than fwdaj, but not by much. Meh.

  8. Wait, Mookie attended your screening of Gridlock'd? Fight the power! I went to see the Dilemma with a girl I really liked at the time. Needless to say she didn't like me after it was over. There's nothing more dangerous to the growth of a romantic relationship than Vince Vaughn and Kevin James in a "romantic comedy". The quotation marks are intentional.

  9. I wanna give a shout out to my sister here, who has autism and Down syndrome and can have a major unplanned, involuntary meltdown/seizure type thing at any moment, and pretty frequently. WELL, you can imagine how much that bugs people in theaters, which I can understand but it also sucks because like, no one will babysit her, when will we EVER get to see a movie? Sometimes I wish people were either more
    Tolerant or more understanding. It's pretty nerve wracking being anywhere in public with her because of this, let alone a theater. But she's become so super awesome that now when she's about to have a meltdown in a theater, she tries to walk out first. She has her meltdown, tries to calm down , then goes back in. Sometimes she does this SEVERAL times during a screening. But it's all she can do. She loves the theater, too. Aaand she is such an AWESOME movie fan. I'm proud.

  10. Can I just say.... FUCK YOU GUYS for the last two seconds of this video!!! That's some cold shit to throw onto a poor 'fraidy cat like me who was watching this right before going to sleep.
    Annnnnnnnnnnd I'm never sleeping again.

  11. I'm not watching it again to confirm the sauce..... But from memory I got 'Exorcist face' vibes. In the .5 of a second before I covered my eyes haha!!

    1. Sauce?!?! Haha.... I of course meant source :)