"Help! Zombies!" " I was thinking Kendall could..."
Coming up next in my marathon.
The Fly '86 for the first time cos I suck!
In all seriousness, I love horror despite my large viewing gaps and have had a great few days. Not a bad movie in the bunch. Even Dressed to Kill which I didn't love, mostly due to my expectations, fuelled by Blow-Out, PotP and Carrie, has grown on me in the last 6 hours!
(oh Jesus, I'm half way through. 3 was actually good, but this is getting ridiculous. If I don't see it through now, I never will. Onwards and upwards, as they said in the Last Battle, although C.S. Lewis probably wouldn't approve of ANYONE marathoning the Hellraiser series.)
Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 (1986)
ReplyDelete"Sawyer Family Recipe" chilli contains actual families
Jess Franco's FEMALE VAMPIRE (1975) on Amazon Prime for the first time.
ReplyDeleteRack-focus trophy wife's tits, bush. Print. Repeat.
or
DAMN! Blew my Junesploitation '17 load prematurely.
The Innkeepers (2011)
ReplyDeleteSara Paxton is just so damn adorable!!!
Anthony C. Ferrrante's SHARKANDO 3: OH HELL NO! (2015) on Netflix Instant for the first time.
ReplyDeleteSlightly less plausible than potential Trump presidency.
Rawhead Rex (1986)
ReplyDeleteIrish Power Rangers monsters are way meaner!
SCOUT'S GUIDE TO THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE (2015) on Amazon Prime for the first time.
ReplyDeleteAt least "Milk Money" had Ed Harris.
The Black Cat (1941)
ReplyDelete"What a puss! Like a lemon rinse!"
The Witches (1990)
ReplyDeletePretty terrifying for a kids movie. Yikes.
I Still Know What You Did Last Summer (1998)
ReplyDeleteActually, last summer, jerk murdered her friends.
Phantasm: Ravager (2015)
ReplyDeleteThey should have called it Phantasm: Reggie-ver!
You're next (2011)
ReplyDeleteBrutal murders still have time for punctuation.
The Ghost of Frankenstein (1942):
ReplyDeleteGuys, it'll be different this time, promise.
Repulsion (1965)
ReplyDeleteCrazy good, non repulsive, Catherine Deneuve performance.
The Vampire Lovers (1970)
ReplyDeleteFiguratively and Literally goes for the Boob.
Demons
ReplyDeleteThis movie pushed all my buttons simultaneously.
Pieces ( with Commentary )
ReplyDeleteWhat's this Trumpence shit? Kence 4 life.
City of the Living Dead
ReplyDelete"Help! Zombies!" " I was thinking Kendall could..."
Coming up next in my marathon.
The Fly '86 for the first time cos I suck!
In all seriousness, I love horror despite my large viewing gaps and have had a great few days. Not a bad movie in the bunch. Even Dressed to Kill which I didn't love, mostly due to my expectations, fuelled by Blow-Out, PotP and Carrie, has grown on me in the last 6 hours!
Southbound (2015)
ReplyDeleteDemon Crossing, 10 miles. Toll? Your soul.
You´re next (2011)
ReplyDeleteA very different kind of family reunion
The Fly 1986 for the first time.
ReplyDeleteExcuse me, gotta pick up my jaw.
Dead Ringers (1988)
ReplyDeleteLesser Cronenberg, but two great Irons performances.
Maniac (1980)
ReplyDeleteNothing says first date like Clams Casino
Mist - Bug bite turns you into Rosie O'Donnel
ReplyDeleteGreen Inferno - So bad, so very very very bad.
ReplyDeleteManiac (2012) - Frodo makes you dead as a Dodo.
ReplyDeleteThe Thing - Ah ah ah ah staying alive....bugger
ReplyDelete(CPR chest compressions should be given to the tempo of the chorus to Staying Alive....)
An American Werewolf in London (1981)
ReplyDeleteFantastic movie...really ends with a bang!
'Don't Go in the House' (1979)
ReplyDeleteGives new definition to the "burning bush".
The Mind's Eye (2015) :
ReplyDeleteBegos is Carpenters and Cronenbergs love child
Let Sleeping Corpses Lie AKA The Living Dead at Manchester Morgue (1974)
ReplyDeleteGreat police work saves the day again.
Hellraiser 4: Bloodline
ReplyDelete18th century France is not in space.
Hellraiser 5: Inferno
ReplyDeleteOk, love buddy cops. Where is Pinhead?
(oh Jesus, I'm half way through. 3 was actually good, but this is getting ridiculous. If I don't see it through now, I never will. Onwards and upwards, as they said in the Last Battle, although C.S. Lewis probably wouldn't approve of ANYONE marathoning the Hellraiser series.)
Pieces with F This Movie commentary
ReplyDeleteHuman Cigarette Christopher George, Human Dynamo Kendall.
Shrew's Nest (2014)
ReplyDeleteWith great sewing skills comes great responsibility
Halloween H20
ReplyDeleteMichael Myers 5 minutes for icing...JGL.
'Rabid' (1977)
ReplyDeleteRose is the "bone claws" of vampires
'Shivers' (1975)
ReplyDeleteTim Allen, star of Canadian condo infomercials
Odd Thomas (2013)
ReplyDeleteQuoting one of the greats - "It's fine"
The Chosen (2015)
ReplyDeleteChoose not to watch this generic crap.
They Look Like People (2015)
ReplyDelete... Yet they smell like Cool Ranch Doritos.
House of Dark Shadows (1970)
ReplyDeleteCharacter development: Please watch the television show
Late Phases (2014)
ReplyDeleteThe Last Starfighter retirement plan kinda sucks.
The Grotto (2014)
ReplyDeleteThe filmmakers' excuse for vacation in Italy.
Christine (1983)
ReplyDeleteClimb a tree! Cars can't climb trees!
Wolf Creek (2005)
ReplyDeleteHead on a stick? What's .... Oh. Ohhhhhh.
The Witch (2016)
ReplyDeleteHmm I vvonder vvho the vvitch vvas.
Blood For Dracula (1974)
ReplyDeleteEuropean virgins are as common as vampires
Dracula (1931)
ReplyDeleteCan't wait for the final showdown! Oh.
Blair Witch (2016)
ReplyDeleteComing around the corner, don’t freak out.
Vampires (John Carpenter, 1998)
ReplyDeleteKarate Kid III's villain bursts into flames
Creepshow 2 (1987)
ReplyDeleteMyers, Freddy, Leatherface, Pinhead, Jason... Chief Wood'nhead.
When a Stranger Calls (2006)
ReplyDeleteHoly shit they paid by the minute!
The Uninvited (2011)
ReplyDeleteBest possible version of "Pitch Perfect 3"
Child's Play 3 (1991)
ReplyDeleteThat barber's way creepier than the Chuckster.
or:
My favorite in the series. Judge me.
Retribution (1987)
ReplyDeleteWe need more movies about gangster possession
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteEvent Horizon (1997)
ReplyDeleteWelcome to Hell, hello to Jason Isaacs.
Tales From The Hood (dir. Rusty Cundieff, 1995)
ReplyDeleteHashtag black dolls lives matter!! Too soon?
or
Racist politician? Not these days... Ohh wait...
Goosebumps (2015)
ReplyDeleteCan't decide - entertaining trifle or ingenious commercial?
The Descent 2005
ReplyDeleteFuck! I didn't know I was Claustrophobic
Blair Witch 2: Book of Shadows (2000)
ReplyDeleteBlair Witch 2: Book of Shadows sucks!
The Gift (2015)
ReplyDeleteI dont really like that monkey mask
Hellraiser 7: Deader
ReplyDeleteCan't think of anything more freaking "deader".
Cabin Fever (2016)
ReplyDeleteGarbage. Stupid. Terrible. Mean. Tone Deaf. Fuck.
The Shining
ReplyDeleteHopeless,just see Bullshit conspiracy theories now
Trilogy of Terror (1975)
ReplyDeleteLassard is a better doctor than commandant.
Cronos (1993):
ReplyDeleteThis is why you read the instructions.
Patrick (1978)
ReplyDeleteHe's still waiting for his hand job.
Hellraiser 6: Hellseeker
ReplyDeleteThis is porn level acting. Without sex.
Ghoulies III: Ghoulies go to College (1991)
ReplyDeleteI knew I should've majored in Ghoulie.
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 (1986):
ReplyDeleteLeatherface just wanted to hear "Free Bird."
30 Days of Night (2007)
ReplyDeleteClaugh wahab bagh mekhh ma oahb screeeeeeeee!
Southbound (2015)
ReplyDeleteAmen? Right? We say amen after prayer?
The Tommyknockers (1993) Stephen King Marathon
ReplyDeleteTommyknockers, the leading cause of tooth decay.
Hush (2008)
ReplyDeleteAnnoying voices keeping it down 'Til Tuesday
Stuff Stephanie in the Incinerator (1989)
ReplyDeleteSuffers from lack of incinerators and stuffing.
Jaws: The Revenge(1987)
ReplyDeleteAbout a shark struggling with deep resentment?
Hellraiser 8: Hellworld
ReplyDeleteThe ending is much better than expected.
Army of Darkness (1992)
ReplyDeleteOh to peek inside the Rami's minds?
The Monster Squad (1987)
ReplyDeleteWho are you?.... We're The Monster Squad.
Creepshow(1982)
ReplyDeleteSomeone please get dad the goddamn cake
The Cabin in the Woods (2012) dir. Drew Goddard
ReplyDeleteClever deconstructionism makes my husband's bulge turgid.
Hatchet II
ReplyDeleteWait, so how's there a Hatchet III?
Lake Mungo (2008)
ReplyDeleteDateline and Paranormal Witness have a baby.
Theater of Blood
ReplyDeleteI, for one, would not've been murdered.
Phantasm: Ravager (2016)
ReplyDeleteThose silver balls get bigger and bigger
Young Frankenstein
ReplyDeleteCloris Leachman: the best of all time.
Signs (2002):
ReplyDeleteThat's why I never finish my water!
Day of the Dead (1985)
ReplyDeleteRhodes makes some valid points, you know?
A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors (1987)
ReplyDeleteAnyone else hearing that Edith Piaf song?
Young Frankenstein (1974)
ReplyDeleteGreat seeing this on the big screen!
Dark Was the Night (2014)
ReplyDeleteMarital problems? Call in a CG monster.
Sleepaway Camp (1983)
ReplyDeleteStrangest aspect of movie: well done score.
The Reef (2010)
ReplyDeleteExpecting cheesy fun. Got true story terror.
Haunted Honeymoon (1986)
ReplyDeleteMy honeymoon is soon. I'm a werewolf.
Attack on Titan the Movie: Part 1 (2015)
ReplyDeleteCritically important: Kaiju fans don't miss this.
Hatchet III
ReplyDeleteOkay seriously, how is this gonna work?
Dawn of the Dead (2004)
ReplyDeleteNeeds Schwarzenegger shouting "Get to the boat!"
Hellraiser 1987
ReplyDeleteI'm doomed, I'm really bad at puzzles.
Night of the Creeps [Director's Cut] (1986):
ReplyDeleteEverybody should answer the phone "Thrill Me!"
The Innkeepers (2011)
ReplyDeleteMaid in Manhattan 2: Basement Romance
28 Days Later (2003)
ReplyDeleteHello? Hello? Hello? Oh shit! Run! Run!!!!
Bubba the Redneck Werewolf (2016)
ReplyDeleteI know Wolfcop. You are no Wolfcop.
I Still Know What You Did Last Summer (1998)
ReplyDeleteThis didn't kill Jack Black's career...crazy!
Green Room (2015)
ReplyDeleteOh shit, Patrick Stewart is a Nazi!
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteGremlins (1984)
ReplyDeleteMicrowave dinner has a whole new meaning
976-Evil (1988)
ReplyDeleteGive a call! Charges apply, boredom awaits.
THE PURGE: ELECTION YEAR (2016)
ReplyDeleteRich white men still suck, I guess.
Pieces: makes my balls hurt even more (see review of The Seperant and the Rainbow)
ReplyDelete