by JB
Ahhhhhh! Settle into the warmth and coziness of shiny metal discs and reliable Hollywood entertainment, all available at a moment’s notice! Lose yourself in ephemeral, transitory pleasures that will keep you from pondering THE FUTURE!
Sometimes, things don’t turn out the way you want, but that’s just how the world works. The smart money will self-assess, make a plan, make a man, make a plan of a man, a canal and yet another plan; then spend the next few years cocooned in a self-imposed exile of dreaming and streaming, DVD, Blu-ray, and 4K. Yay!
Panama.
What follows is the tip of my comfort iceberg: a scattershot blueprint of next week's escape from real reality into a deeper reality, a reality that will exist only in my cerebral cortex for the next 34,000 hours. The following movies will do nicely as a high-octane movie Mai-Tai, a kind of video narcotic—a “JB’s Little Helper,” if you will. Wheeeeeee, off to Filmland! Of course, I will check back weekly to bring you this column, fellow Movie Lovers. Before I drop out, I will just drop in... to see what condition my condition is in.
The Beatles: The Eye of the Hurricane: American Tour 1964Boy Howdy, am I ever glad I got over my childish reticence to buy bootlegs decades ago. Forget about the morality, think of the fun! I have been hearing much ballyhoo lately about the upcoming Disney+ documentary,
Beatles '64, set for release on November 29. My anticipation for the doc is somewhat diminished because my
Eye of the Hurricane disc contains ALL extant news and documentary footage taken during said tour, so in essence I have already seen the new doc’s “rough draft.” Suck it, Disney.
The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra &
The Lost Skeleton Returns AgainI placed a few choice audio clips from these two tasty gems on my latest Halloween CD, and some recipients enjoyed the clips so much they were moved to seek out the films themselves. I sometimes forget how much I love the work of fellow Monster Kid Larry Blamire and how unique and special his little low-budget wunderfilms truly are. You can check these out of the YouTube machine... but I own the discs, baby!
The AIP
Beach Party Films
Why aren’t all of these American treasures available on Blu-ray disc?
Beach Blanket Bingo is.
Bikini Beach is.
Muscle Beach Party is.
Pajama Party is. So where in the hell is
Beach Party,
How to Stuff a Wild Bikini,
Ski Party, and
The Ghost in the Invisible Bikini?
I'm lucky enough to own a few. You will get your hands on my 2007 Frankie & Annette DVD set when you pry my cold, dead, surfing fingers from it.
Pure American cheese. The best one is
Bikini Beach. Long live Eric Von Zipper.
When Comedy Was KingRobert Youngson and his wonderful compilation films represented an island of respite in my misspent youth. Channel 9 (WGN) in Chicago showed them A LOT. When I was twelve or thirteen, I had an unquenchable thirst for silent comedy and these were my... thirst quenchers. Youngson originally assembled these compilations for theatrical release in the 1950s and '60s. They were a sensation, garnering rave reviews and impressive box office returns. He made eight, and each one is a delight:
The Golden Age of Comedy (1957),
When Comedy Was King (1960),
Days of Thrills and Laughter (1961),
30 Years of Fun (1963), M-G-M's Big Parade of Comedy (1964),
Laurel and Hardy's Laughing '20s (1965),
The Further Perils of Laurel and Hardy (1967), and
Four Clowns (1970). I plan to pop in my
WCWK DVD this week and yuk it up for old times' sake. Every one of these, except the MGM compilation, is also available on the YouTube machine. Huzzah!
52 Discs of
Mystery Science Theater 3000Some people hate these guys. I love them to pieces. Sometimes when I watch an old movie that I have seen a hundred times, listening to THEIR voices talking over the movie helps drown out MY OWN VOICES talking over the movie. Ahhhh, the sweet release of sarcasm!
The original team has since split up: Mike Nelson, Bill Corbett, and Kevin Murphy formed Rifftrax. They release discs as well as appear live in shows carried by Fathom Events to theaters nationwide. Trace Beaulieu and Frank Conniff appear as “The Mads” in internet-only riffing shows carried on a website hosted by their parent company Dumb Industries. (Last Tuesday, they made fun of JB-favorite
The Giant Gila Monster.) You can watch them live or purchase and view their riffing shows after the fact. I wish the five of them would reconcile but, hey, you can’t reheat a souffle.
Well, those are some of my first "comfort film" choices. The calculator app on my smartphone machine tells me that I will need approximately 17,000 movies to get through the next four years. After all, I avoided the COVID pandemic by essentially locking myself in the basement for 24 months. (I am many things, but I am not stupid; I quickly figured out that COVID’s favorite lunch was fat old men!)
My Blu-ray/DVD collection and I am up to this newest challenge. Remember, I am an American.
woot! loooove this article.
ReplyDelete1) i cant believe ive never heard of Youngston's compilation series!?! my knowledge of silent comedy is lacking...this sounds like the perfect gateway for more.
2) more new beatles content! woot! (will be nice to cut in with my semi regular watching of Get Back...sooo good).
3) MST3K! huzzzzaaaa! One of my favorite things of all time. absolutely my number 1 comfort watch. quick story: many many years ago i attended the 2nd MST convention in minnesota. they showed the MST3K movie with some added scenes including one where Servo is obsessed with Corned Beef Hash (naturally). I went out and bought a can and had it in had during the signings the next day. Murphy saw me and just yelled in perfect servo voice "MY HASH!!!!!!!". LOL.