Johnny Showtime: Christmas Wish List

 by JB

Holiday suggestions for the movie lover on your list.

With the languid hassle of giving thanks out of the way, we can once again, with a clear conscience and clean motives, set our sights on just how GOOD I have been this year.

Christmas shopping is always difficult for those loved ones who 1) do not drop enough gifting hints during the first ten months of the year, 2) are single-mindedly obsessed with one or two subjects to the exclusion of all others (Music and Movies, Fishing and Boating, Cooking and Baking, Fox News and Racism), 3) tend to buy themselves every delightful item the moment it comes down the pike, and 4) are just misanthropic enough so that your decision whether to buy them something at all is held in reserve and made at the very last minute... like, "It's Christmas Eve!" last minute.

I won't tell you which one I am! (It's Number 3.) For the rest of you, I have been curating this listicle for many months now, and I’m sure it contains enough obscure, affordable, and off-the-wall suggestions to satisfy the most finicky Grinch.*

Ready?

Popsmith Popcorn Popper
($213, as far as I can tell. 20% OFF with code HOLIDAYPOP)

These enterprising folks have been trying to sell me one of these things on social media for months. I now reward their tenacity with a mention in my column. Although I do not own one, have never tried one, and think it a might pricey, it looks intriguing. Early ads compared it to the “Whirlypop,” the stovetop popper with the built-in stirrer that has been around for years, but the first commercial for the Popsmith loudly suggested that the Whirlypop was a piece of cheap shit and impossible to clean. The Popsmith clearly solves these problems by being very expensive and dishwasher safe. The Popsmith people also offer packets containing pre-measured kernels, oil, and seasoning. They must be doing something right; they made Oprah’s Favorite Things list.

A Disney + Subscription so that your gift recipient may watch the supercharged Beatles Anthology 2025 (Prices Vary – Introductory rates seem to hover at around $5 a month.)

Not only has the audio and video of this 1995 DVD chestnut been scrubbed and made shiny but the content has been scrubbed to make the whole thing politically correct! (The restoration work here is superb, plus new material have been added.) GONE are references to flaming condoms, gay French boys, promoters pushing handicapped fans at the Fab Four in the mistaken belief that meeting a Beatle can heal them, and John mocking the afflicted during Paul’s between-song patter during concerts. Now you can enjoy better sound and pictures... with a clear conscience.

A New Francesco Francavilla Poster ($85)

One of my favorite modern artists did a Universal Monsters series for the Mondo Gallery in Austin some years back. These posters are magnificent, sold out in a matter of days, and now fetch high prices on the eBay machine. Trust me, I love these posters; they make up the majority of the décor in my sanctum sanctorum. Mondo got out of the poster business recently (They will still sell you toys and vinyl records.) which left Francavilla’s monster rally... incomplete.

Imagine my surprise when the Coda Gallery in New York recently announced its own Universal Monsters series, including a new poster by Francesco Francavilla of Boris Karloff’s Mummy! They even premiered the poster on Halloween night, at the famed Egyptian Theater in Hollywood before a screening of... you guessed it... Karloff’s The Mummy (1932). I scoured the internet. I made phone calls. I put out the word on social media. “Anyone going to The Mummy screening at the Egyptian tonight? Do you want to do a fellow Monster Kid a solid?” I HAD to have one of these posters. Turns out, I needn’t have worried, a few days later they were available online at popular prices. Now you can get one too! The variant edition has sold out, but Coda still has a few copies left of the standard edition. I actually prefer the color scheme of the standard edition.

Recent BFI Monographs (About $15 a piece)

These are always reliable, fun reads. The one I am really looking forward to is the upcoming A Hard Day’s Night volume that drops next June.

Nashville (BFI Film Classics)

Die Hard (BFI Film Classics)

Rebel Without a Cause (BFI Film Classics)

*TANGENT: Last night was the Tree Lighting Ceremony in the park near my home, and I ventured forth to enjoy the pageantry and festivities. Because it was very poorly organized, people milled around for what seemed like hours, waiting for the lighting of the tree and the arrival of two special guests: Santa Claus, whom we all know and love; and a second character billed as the “805 Grouch.” 805 is our area code in Ventura County; the Grouch would seem to be some copyright-free version of the Grinch. Suess be litigious, apparently. I never got to see the Grouch because, once the festivities were clearly running way behind schedule, I high-tailed it back to my abode for some Thanksgiving leftovers and the last two episodes of Beatles Anthology 2025.

Just wait until next year, 805 Grouch!