To celebrate the greatest month of the year, we're bringing back the popular Scary Movie Challenge! The rules are simple: Every time you watch a horror movie during the month of October, add the name of the movie and a SEVEN WORD REVIEW (no more, no less) in the comments section of this post.
Last year, we beat our target of 100 and got to 125, so this year we're raising the goal to 150. That's no problem! If we just watch every Nightmare on Elm Street, Halloween, Friday the 13th, Hellraiser, Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Saw movie, we'll already be at 51!
Just like before, we'll be reading many of our favorite entries on the podcast throughout the month. Pressure!
Check out last year's Scary Movie Challenge if you still aren't sure what we're talking about.
Let's do this, F Heads! Yay Scary Movie Month!!!
For Audition, my first of the month (why yes, I'm going to try and do them in haiku):
ReplyDeleteUnsuspecting girls
Who is auditioning here?
Malevolency
Who put these sticks here? A Witch!
ReplyDelete-Blair Witch Project
"Houseboat Horror"
ReplyDeleteAussie film isn't scary.....it's just shit.
Sleepaway Camp:
ReplyDeleteLater remade and retitled "She's The Man"
The Descent:
ReplyDeleteAussie girls in a scary cave....Decent...
FROM A WHISPER TO A SCREAM: Horror anthology could use more Ted Danson.
ReplyDeleteTrick 'r Treat: Interconnected stories. Respect Halloween or watch out!
ReplyDeleteScream 4: "how meta can you get?!" "how whata?"
ReplyDeleteLAND OF THE DEAD: Romero shits the bed. Luckily, Asia Argento.
ReplyDeletePUPPET MASTER: Most wooden performance NOT given by a puppet.
ReplyDeleteTHE HORROR SHOW: Lance Henriksen versus Brion James. Audience loses.
ReplyDeleteFRIDAY THE 13th (1980): These kids dress weird. Camps are gross.
ReplyDeleteDEEP SPACE: ALIEN copy lacks all goodness of original.
ReplyDeleteHostel:
ReplyDeleteOh my god, Im going to puke
FRANKENSTEIN: Karloff. Clive. Whale. Need I say more?
ReplyDeleteTHE LAST EXORCISM: Makes a believer out of Professor Lasky.
ReplyDeleteCANDYMAN: Virginia Madsen hates bees but loves Pinot!
ReplyDeleteGRADUATION DAY: Makes me wish I'd been held back.
ReplyDeleteHALLOWEEN: RESURRECTION:
ReplyDeleteLaurie Strode got lucky. She died first.
My Bloody Valentine (2009):
ReplyDeleteSequel proves it's drugged hallucination? *crosses fingers*
WOLFEN: Native American werewolves wreak havoc on construction.
ReplyDeleteTROLL 2: The moral is - never trust a vegetarian!
ReplyDeleteHARDWARE: What did I ever do to robots?
ReplyDeleteTERROR IN THE AISLES: Monster movie clip show. Horror's greatest hits.
ReplyDeleteTHE HILLS HAVE EYES (2006 remake)
ReplyDeleteFeatures creepy Billy Drago. Occasionally truly horrific.
THE LOST BOYS: Endlessly watchable, ridiculous saxophonist. Cry, little sister.
ReplyDeleteDRACULA (1979): You, Frank Langella, are no Bela Lugosi.
ReplyDeleteAFTER MIDNIGHT: Horror anthology could use more Leslie Nielsen.
ReplyDeleteFRIDAY THE 13TH: You're doomed... to watch this shitty ripoff!
ReplyDeleteDR. JECKYLL & MR HYDE: Frederich March plus Frederich March equals Oscar!
ReplyDeleteDR. JECKYLL & MR. HYDE (1931): Geez, you think you know a guy.
ReplyDeleteSCREAMTIME: Horror anthology could use more fucking off.
ReplyDeleteMONSTER SQUAD: All the classic monsters, plus Wolfman's nards.
ReplyDeleteTHE GRAVEDANCERS: The Haunting meets Paranormal Activity meets Footloose.
ReplyDeleteFright Night:
ReplyDeleteSurprisingly not as good as the remake
What Lies Beneath:
ReplyDeleteCheating husband killed by girl he murdered
Remakes are pointless, but Aaron Paul rocks.
ReplyDelete- The Last House on the Left
Session 9:
ReplyDeleteMoodily tension inducing but also slightly predictable.
I SPIT ON YOUR GRAVE:
ReplyDeleteFemale revenge has never looked so dirty!
PSYCHO II: Norman's still crazy after all these years.
ReplyDeleteDrive, Drive, Lost, Torgo, Women, Mustache, MANOS!
ReplyDeleteNight Gallery (the pilot anthology):
ReplyDeleteCreepy painting. Karmic blackout. Not a rowboat.
Friday the 13th: Part 2:
ReplyDeleteBurlap mask is scarier than goalie mask.
PENNY DREADFUL: a unique concept, played to good effect.
ReplyDeleteTHE PEOPLE UNDER THE STAIRS:
ReplyDeleteFool is a good brother to Alice.
RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD PART II: Can't describe its shittiness in seven words.
ReplyDeleteDEAD AND BURIED: Good and surprising. You can't trust anyone.
ReplyDeleteDracula
ReplyDeleteMAKE SOME NOISE! Seriously, no music score?
House of the Devil
ReplyDeleteDance babysitter dance! Don't eat the pizza.
WOLF MAN (2010): Mr. Del Toro, wake up, we're filming.
ReplyDeleteTRICK 'R TREAT: No one is off limits. Especially kids.
ReplyDeleteTROLLHUNTER: Not so much scary as friggin' awesome.
ReplyDeleteDANCE OF THE DEAD: Like my prom, but with more zombies.
ReplyDeleteSLEEPAWAY CAMP: Terrible movie, great commentary—that's a penis!
ReplyDeleteFEAST III: THE HAPPY FINISH: So much shouting and blood. Practically unwatchable.
ReplyDeleteFEAR DOT COM:
ReplyDeleteFear dot com dot com, wait....what?
WAXWORK: Marquis de Sade vs. Zach Galligan. Yep.
ReplyDeleteGHOULIES: GREMLINS ripoff? No, just regular demon worship.
ReplyDeletePOLTERGEIST: A Tobe Hooper movie that doesn't suck.
ReplyDeleteFido:
ReplyDeleteA boy and his zombie. Bloody satire.
I BURY THE LIVING: Story of a man and his pushpins.
ReplyDeleteThe Curse of Frankenstein (1957): Shards of glass in brain cause problems.
ReplyDeleteTHE NAKED GUN: Um, it's scary how funny it is?
ReplyDeleteSLEEPAWAY CAMP: Heeeeeey...Bill Murray isn't in this movie!
ReplyDeleteTHE OTHERS:
ReplyDeleteSpoiler alert: Ghost's point of view...sorry.
THE WILD HUNT:
ReplyDeleteLARP of the Flies. Play time's over.
DEVIL: Elevator muzak is the soundtrack to hell.
ReplyDeleteTROLL HUNTER: Is this horror? It feels like it.
ReplyDeleteTHE PIT AND THE PENDULUM (1961): Yet another great Poe/Price/Corman collaboration.
ReplyDeleteHALLOWEEN 4: THE RETURN OF MICHAEL MYERS: Best HALLOWEEN sequel. Danielle Harris, kid clown.
ReplyDeleteThe Others (which I've avoided spoilers for a decade on, believe it or not):
ReplyDeleteCurtains, sunlight, shaking tables = sad, sad ending.
Terror in the Aisles:
ReplyDeleteClip show cash-in. Real slasher? The editor!
Tremors: One more reason to pee standing up.
ReplyDeleteFRIDAY THE 13TH PART 2: At least it plays by the rules.
ReplyDeleteFRIDAY THE 13th PART III: Geez, Shelly, sometimes you're such a dick!
ReplyDeleteHocus Pocus
ReplyDeleteProbably Disney's best pro-sex Halloween movie.
Nightmare On Elm Street Part 2: Only Jesse doesn't realize Jesse is gay.
ReplyDeleteRAW MEAT: Delicious human flesh. It's what's for dinner.
ReplyDeleteDRACULA A.D. 1972: Count revived by swinging Londoners. Groovy, baby.
ReplyDeleteFRIDAY THE 13th PART IV: Skinny dipping has never been so ubiquitous.
ReplyDeleteMIRRORS: Keifer NOT using mirrors to snort blow.
ReplyDeleteSLEEPY HOLLOW: Flawed, but still among my annual favorites.
ReplyDeleteSon of Frankenstein
ReplyDeleteWait, is this Caligari? Nope, it's Frankenstein.
The Evil Dead 2: I wish my arm was a chainsaw.
ReplyDeleteCreepshow 2: A man-eating oil slick...hell yeah!
ReplyDeleteHostel: How much would you pay to torture?
ReplyDeleteHANNIBAL: The best non-zombie brain eating ever.
ReplyDeleteTHE LAST EXORCISM: The Devil went down to Louisiana... maybe.
ReplyDeleteTHE SHINING: Bear suit-on-butler sex is creepy
ReplyDeleteNIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 3: THE DREAM WARRIORS:
ReplyDeleteBecause the first two needed more Dokken.
Return to OZ: Scarier at 30 than at age 5.
ReplyDeleteHALLOWEEN III: SEASON OF THE WITCH
ReplyDeleteThose masks are some effed up mofos!
Paranormal Activity: My most boring theatre experience to date.
ReplyDeleteDream House:
ReplyDeleteWill Eightenten? What an incredibly unusual name!
Carrie: Never piss off the weird kids...never.
ReplyDeleteNIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET: What if Freddy tried picking his nose?
ReplyDeleteHOUSE ON HAUNTED HILL (1959) - Cheap haunted house scares, William Castle style.
ReplyDeleteTALES FROM THE DARKSIDE - THE MOVIE:
ReplyDeleteSometimes billed as "Tales from the Shittyside."
HALLOWEEN II (1981): The Shape returns for the first time.
ReplyDeleteJason X: Is Jason really qualified for space exploration?
ReplyDeleteJason Goes To Hell: The Jason movie that forgot the Jason.
ReplyDeleteHalloween H2O: I rescind my complaints about Mr. Zombie.
ReplyDeleteThe Ring
ReplyDelete"Please be Kind, Rewind" - Asian Zombie Girl
THE WOLF MAN (1941)
ReplyDeleteLon Chaney: Big lunkhead... but best werewolf!
THE DARK HALF: Romero and King collaboration sure isn't CREEPSHOW.
ReplyDeleteDEAD AND BURIED: A picture is worth a thousand murders.
ReplyDeleteCAPTIVITY: Calling this shitty is insulting to shit.
ReplyDeletePSYCHO: Norman Bates is his mother. Oedipal much?
ReplyDeleteTHE CURSE OF FRANKENSTEIN: Like the monster, Hammer horror is born.
ReplyDeleteRETURN TO SLEEPAWAY CAMP: Holy shit, seven words are not enough.
ReplyDeleteTHE MIST: Big bugs attack grocery store in B&W.
ReplyDeletePARANORMAL ACTIVITY: Know girlfriend's past before you move in.
ReplyDeleteDemon Knight, Billy Zane deserved an Oscar
ReplyDeleteDREAM HOUSE -- Spoiler alert: This movie isn't very good.
ReplyDeleteCabin Fever: I prefer Rider Strong as Shawn Hunter.
ReplyDeleteRED DRAGON: Ralph Fiennes, slightly crazier than William Blake.
ReplyDeleteTHE DEVIL BAT: Bad guy Bela breeds bloodthirsty bats. Bonkers.
ReplyDeleteDESPERATION: Another Mick Garris/Stephen King telefilm. Tak.
ReplyDeleteRIDING THE BULLET: That roller coaster is a symbol, man.
ReplyDeleteCHILD'S PLAY:
ReplyDeleteTo do tonight: burn my daughter's dolls.
DRACULA (1931): You, Bela Lugosi, are no Frank Langella.
ReplyDeleteHELLRAISER: Gets better and better every single year.
ReplyDeleteMay
ReplyDeleteMaybe I shouldn't date a goth chick......
Paranormal Activity
ReplyDeleteMicah, dump her! She's ugly. Problem solved.
Blair Witch Project
ReplyDeleteWaitresses from Steak and Shake shouldn't camp.
MAY: Romantic Cannibalism makes this girl incredibly horny.
ReplyDeleteBLAIR WITCH 2: is underrated. Please release director's cut now.
ReplyDeleteTRIANGLE:
ReplyDeleteHow many seagulls are in that pile?
THE VANISHING (Dutch version)
ReplyDeleteGet drugged by kidnapper of girlfriend? Dumbass.
OR
Where's Pei Mei when you need him?
SEED OF CHUCKY: Doll knocking up Jennifer Tilly is funny.
ReplyDeleteCREEPSHOW 2: Beware of wooden Indians, oil and hitchhikers.
ReplyDeleteEXORCIST 2: John Boorman rapes William Friedkin's genre masterpiece.
ReplyDeleteEXORCIST-THE BEGINNING/DOMINION: Paul Schrader and Renny Harlin both fail.
ReplyDeleteINCIDENT ON AND OFF A MOUNTAIN ROAD: Seek out this stunning short horror film.
ReplyDeleteSanta Sangre: How do you kill with no arms?
ReplyDeleteGHOULIES: Charles Manson's Muppet Babies: The Motion Picture
ReplyDeleteCARRIE (2002): Because we should fix what isn't broken.
ReplyDeleteTHE FALL OF THE HOUSE OF USHER: More great atmosphere, more great Vincent Price.
ReplyDeleteAMERICAN PSYCHO:
ReplyDeletePsycho killer, qu'est-ce que c'est? Business card.
Halloween II:
ReplyDeleteRobot Myers stalks in an abandoned hospital.
POLTERGEIST II: THE OTHER SIDE: Gosh, Coach, that's a mighty big tapeworm.
ReplyDeleteCURSE OF THE CAT PEOPLE: No horror here, just a weird kid.
ReplyDeleteFRANKENSTEIN MEETS THE SPACE MONSTER:
ReplyDeleteRobotic Astronaut: "Ground Control to major turkey...".
TARGETS: Hey! Stop shooting at Boris Karloff, asshole.
ReplyDeleteVANISHING ON 7TH STREET:
ReplyDeleteHayden Christensen disappears. This is scary because...?
SANTA AND THE ICE CREAM BUNNY:
ReplyDeleteDare you to say this ISN'T horrorific.
:-P
FRANKENSTEIN 1970:
ReplyDeleteKarloff has his eyes on the prize.
BEHIND THE MASK: THE RISE OF LESLIE VERNON: Pretty fake, even for a fake documentary.
ReplyDeleteSHOCK WAVES (1976): Albino Nazi Zombies walk the Caribbean floor.
ReplyDeleteDEAD SNOW (2009): "Shock Waves" in Norway without Cushing or Carradine.
Duel: One man. One shitty car. Psychotic truck.
ReplyDeleteDRACULA -SPANISH VERSION (1931: Darker, sexier, perhaps better? but needs Lugosi.
ReplyDeleteFRIDAY THE 13th PART V: From a re-purposed Scooby Doo spec script.
ReplyDeleteThe Thing (2011)
ReplyDeleteCould have been worse but still not good.
FIDO: Tim Burton wishes he thought of it.
ReplyDeleteFIDO: A better ending if the mom miscarried
ReplyDeleteDAY OF THE DEAD: We can be happy underground.....with zombies?
ReplyDeleteFRANKENSTEIN (1931): Doctor Frankenstein - the man or the monster?
ReplyDeleteBefore Brutus "The Barber" Beefcake, there was...SWEENEY TODD: THE DEMON BARBER OF FLEET STREET (2007)
ReplyDeleteBraindead (Dead Alive): Umm....ok, errr, yeah....but, riiight......what?
ReplyDeleteTHE BRIDE OF FRANKENSTEIN (1935): Gorgeous cinematography, excellent performances...and miniature people???
ReplyDeleteTERROR TRAIN (1980): Turn brain off...or better yet, DVD.
ReplyDeleteTHE FUNHOUSE (1981): Moral of the story - give'm the refund!
ReplyDeleteAdam
ReplyDeleteWaxworks -
Wake me up when this is over.
LIFEFORCE (1985) - What if Dracula was a nude girl?
ReplyDeleteBurn Witch Burn -
ReplyDeleteLead actor looks like Jim Varney's dad.
Hour of the Wolf -
ReplyDeleteThis still feels like Pre-crime. In B&W.
Abominable Dr. Phibes -
ReplyDeleteHolly Martins vs. the Thriller narrator. Yes!
Wizard of Gore -
ReplyDeleteI'm embarassed but I like this movie.
HALLOWEEN H2O: Way to end franchise with dignity.....D'OH!!!
ReplyDeleteHalloween (1978)
ReplyDeleteSlow burn horror movies are the best.
Poltergeist -
ReplyDeleteI like the ripoff better. Watch Insidious.
Pumpkinhead -
ReplyDeleteMotorcyle toughs BMX Jonathan Lipnicki to death.
ISLE OF THE SNAKE PEOPLE (1971): Keep repeating, "'Targets' was Karloff's last film..."
ReplyDeleteGates of Hell -
ReplyDeleteMean spirited making this a joyless endeavor.
Vampire Lovers -
ReplyDeleteIngrid Pitt/Madeline Smith: What a pair!
Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things -
ReplyDeleteChildren (and adults) shouldn't watch this movie.
1408: "Oh, we've only just begunnnn, to live."
ReplyDeleteThe Sentinel
ReplyDeleteGreat 'Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon' resource.
WAXWORKS: The Love Boat of German Expressionist Cinema.
ReplyDeleteHOUR OF THE WOLF: Hour? Seems MUCH longer. No wolf either.
ReplyDeleteBURN, WITCH, BURN: Certainly much better than BURN, HOLLYWOOD, BURN
ReplyDeleteThe Last Exorcism: I wish it really was the last...
ReplyDeleteQuarantine: Interesting pace, and Jennifer Carpenter is great.
ReplyDeleteBram Stoker's Dracula
ReplyDeleteWe needed a tacked on love story?
From Dusk Till Dawn -
ReplyDeleteAlternate Title: Good Night & Good Luck
THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE - Is it possible to un-watch a movie?
ReplyDeleteSORORITY ROW (2009): Does LOWEST IQ now guarantees college entrance?
ReplyDeleteFreddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare
ReplyDeleteRubbery make-up, awful puns. Wake up already!
IT! (1967): Roddy McDowell classes up yet another stinker.
ReplyDeleteJASON X: Space, really, space? Know what? Fuck this.
ReplyDeleteJASON X: "Friday the 13th On Ice/Liquid Nitrogen!".
ReplyDeleteor..
JASON X: We really thought "Andromedia" would be bigger.
JENNIFER (1978): "Carrie" clone. Emotional "torture porn". Poor kitty.
ReplyDeleteI SAW WHAT YOU DID...AND I KNOW WHO YOU ARE (1965): Darwin had a theory about these kids...
ReplyDeleteSTRAIT-JACKET (1964): Joan Crawford uncharacteristically stone faced. Jingle jangle.
ReplyDeleteA NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET: Winner and still champion. Wes Craven's best.
ReplyDeleteJASON LIVES - FRIDAY THE 13TH PART VI (1986):
ReplyDeleteThoughtful, inspiring, and subtle. A real tearjerker.
THE SENTINEL: Geriatric dad threesome? I'd consider suicide, too.
ReplyDeleteTHE FRIGHTENERS: Cool ideas, uneven execution, first LOTR prequel.
ReplyDeleteJASON GOES TO HELL: THE FINAL FRIDAY: Wait...Jason is that guy from JAG??
ReplyDeleteTHE FLY II: Makeup Oscar doesn't mean you should direct.
ReplyDeleteor
THE FLY II: Can't believe Frank Darabont co-wrote this thing.