Friday, September 2, 2011

Watchin' Trailerz with Doug (September 2)

Two days ago, Patton Oswalt (Monkey Photographer in Zoolander) was interviewed by the A.V. Club. In the article, he mentions a few podcasts he listens to, including WTF with Marc Maron and the Pod F. Tompkast. In other words, podcasts EVERYONE ALREADY LISTENS TO (if you're a podcast listener, that is). Shockingly, he doesn't mention F This Movie!, which, in my opinion, is a crying shame. "NOTHING OUTSIDE THE BOX, PLEASE!" -Patton Oswalt. Still, lukewarm hostility aside, you should read the interview. Funny guy, Mr. Oswalt.

The Rum Diary
Release date: Oct. 28, 2011

I saw Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas when I was in college, and, honestly, I had no idea what was going on. What a batshit crazy movie! I was a good kid -- no booze, no drugs, no road trips to America's playground (what happens in Vegas, something-something snooooooze). Ergo, all the trippy stuff was WAY over my head (which, I'm sure, was by design). Further, I never read Hunter S. Thompson, opting instead for literature that gave me "Goose" "Bumps" (*cough* R.L. Stine *cough*). However, because I was "into movies" (read: "quasi-douchy"), I gleefully went along with the film, and, in adult conversations, referred to it as a "surreal masterpiece." Oh, how desperately I wanted to fit in! The Rum Diary is only the second film adaptation of Thompson's literary work (the third, if you count 1980's Where the Buffalo Roam), and it already feels repetitive. Except, also, without an edge? I'M TALKING NO EDGE PEOPLE! Unless you count Johnny Depp bouncing on top of another grown man's crotch next to a Puerto Rican police car (I don't). This preview feels like a Hunter S. Thompson movie geared towards my mom. And that might be on purpose, considering how hard it is to market the subject matter.

The Woman in Black
Release date: Jan. 20, 2012

If I was Greg Brady, I would OWN it, just like Barry Williams. If I was Sulu, I would EMBRACE it, just like George Takei. If I was FUCKING HARRY POTTER, I certainly wouldn't be exposing my junk on Broadway, nor would I make creepy British period puppet movies! But that's just me. "Avada Kedavra Career!" On another note, hey, Hermione! I'll date you (just don't tell Shadia)!

In Time
Release date: Oct. 28, 2011

I saw this preview for the first time IN A THEATER (jealous?) with PATRICK (less jealous?). The reason I bring this up is because I'm usually "Watchin'" "Trailerz" online for the purposes of this column. I was genuinely excited to see this on "the big screen" (unfortunately, it was before Rise of the Planet of the Apes, which ugh). This looks like a perfectly serviceable action/sci-fi/drama about a dystopian future, with some challenging moral questions about overpopulation and wealth. HOWEVER, can Justin Timberlake please, just, stop? Everything. Stop it. If only for a little while (we need to catch our collective breath). Stop acting, stop appearing on SNL, stop dancing, stop making music, just ... stop. Yes, we ALL know you're VERY talented. You're charming and confident (cocky?) and you've got charisma coming out of your omelet. But it's enough already -- you're wearing out your welcome. CONVERSELY, Amanda Seyfried -- I won't be satisfied with you until your eyeballs engulf the rest of your head. KEEP 'EM GROWING!

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