The Fly (1986)Never, ever, let Cronenberg deliver your baby.
Rosemary's Baby (1968)Maude is creepier without Cat Stevens music
The Birds (1963)Made me want to dropkick some seagulls.
Child's Play 2 (1990)Light punishment Andy for Fuck You Bitch.
From Dusk Till Dawn (1996)♪ Hot air hangs like a dead man... ♪
Eraserhead (1977)The strangest safe sex advert ever made
The Black Cat (2007) This particular cat was a total asshole.
THE CHILL FACTOR, aka DEMON POSSESSED (1989/1993, Amazon Prime) for the first time.Nobody'll be seated during demonic snowmobile chase!
Jean Rollins' REQUIEM FOR A VAMPIRE (1971, Amazon Prime) for the first time.Drac's lieutenants blow wad making Skinemax flick.
Eden Log (2007)Surely not entertaining, but at least interesting.
David Cronenberg's THE BROOD (1979, Hulu's Criterion Channel) for the first time.Seriously, David, what's your ex really like?
Eden Lake (2008)Kelly Reilly kicks white trash kids assesorFassbender will never suffer like this again
Corpse Bride (2005)Finally a family friendly tale of necrophilia
5 Dolls for an August Moon (1970)The case of Danger Five gets murdered.
Apollo 18 (2011)Spoiler: the Secretary of Defense did it.
Saint (2010)Dutch Santa is a real St. Dick.
Berberian Sound Studio (2012)Toby Jones becomes a cabbage serial murderer
Zombeavers (2014)Best beaver pun still goes to Nielsen.
Nosferatu the Vampyre (1979)Also known as: "Klaus Kinski's home movies"
Tremors 5: Bloodlines (2015)Jamie Kennedy Experiment: Endure this movie. Couldn't.
The Blob (1988)That is one industrial strength garbage disposal!
3-2-1 Contact: The Bloodhound Gang: The Case of the Cackling Ghost (1980 TV) Dir. UnknownNot enough ghost cackling for my taste.
a serbian movie (2010) - oh my! not visiting Serbia this year
Creep (2014) - an akward study in akwardness: akward result
You spelled awkward wrong 3 times
Tales from the Crypt [S01E03] - Dig That Cat...He's Real Gone (1989)The lucrative deaths/resurrections of Joey Pants.
Hellraiser (1987)Pinhead perforates people particularly painfully. Perfectly putrid.
Dark Was The Night (2015)Brooding performances give way to bad CGI.
Let the right one in (2008)Let her in but let me OUT!Roger CousineauQuebec, Canada
Friday the 13th Part 5: A New Beginning (1985) Juwanna mannEnchilada manDiarrhea duetFan
Knock Knock (2015)Knock knock. Who's there? Watch something else.
Child's Play 3 (1991)Satan Mountain is currently closed for refurbishments.
Grabbers (2012)Monster squids are allergic to Irish drunks
Triangle (2009)Good film aptly requires repeat...repeat viewings.
Pandorum (2009)There is nothing but darkness out here.
Exorcismus (2010) Being a teenager equals demonic possession? Ayuh.
The Exorcist III (1990)Just take a little off the top.
The Canal (2014)That car needed childproof locks me thinks!
ATM (2012) Just going to the bank is scarier.
Terrorvision (1986)I don't want to talk about it.
The Terminator (1984)Got me burnin' in the third degree.
The House of the Devil (2009)The Adventures of Babysitting with Ti West
He Knows You're Alone (1980)Just enough Turner, could have used Hooch.
Nurse 3D (2012)Paz heading into or emerging from stroke.
Unfriended (2015)The best theatrical horror movie of 2015.
Monkey Shines (1988)Title accurately evaluates all performances in film.
Wishmaster (1997)Wish this didn't stink. Genies are bullshit.
R.L. Stine's Monsterville: Cabinet of Souls (2015) Enjoyed it until the clown showed up.
From Dusk till Dawn (1996)Decapitated bodies make for great electric guitars!
My scifi-horror instance for today ended with:Event Horizon (1997)Paul Anderson is still a trashy director.
Sleepaway Camp (1983) Sing to severed head while naked. Same.
The Vatican Tapes (2015) Dir. Mark NeveldineWould have rather heard Pope Francis' mixtape.
Orca (1977)If Jaws and [Free] Willy had a baby.
Tourist Trap (1979)The reason that mannequins should terrify you.
Popcorn (1991) A movie made by people from Mars.
Blade: Trinity (2007, Dir. David Goyer)Also known as - Patton Oswald: Basketball Superstar
Spring (2014)This remake of Before Sunrise is strange!
Reel Horror (1985)Disparate SOV features cut together. Doesn't work.
Neon Maniacs (1986)Amazon Prime wins again! Great 80s flick.
It Follows (2014)Stalked and brutally killed? Totally worth it.
Ravenous(1999)One mans meal is, well, another man.
John Carpenter's Vampires (1998) dir. See AboveJohn Carpenter imitates John Carpenter, nearly succeeds.
A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream ChildWhere Freddy joins the Planned Parenthood debate.
Last Shift (2014) Dir. Anthony DiBlasi Ignore artwork. Surprisingly good! 5.1 a must. andTired of generic scenes cheapening good films.
Final Destination (2000):If only Eminem would've written back sooner.
Westworld (1973)The Gunslinger inspired slasher movie bad guys
The Funhouse (1981)So that kid definitely got diddled right?
Human Experiments (1979)Why didn't she just call Charles Raine?
I Miss You, Hugs and Kisses (1978)Elke Sommer should've stuck with Mario Bava.
Inferno (1980)Mostly style. No substance. All Dario Argento.
Killer Nun (1979)Opening for Slipknot on the next tour.
Vampyr (1932)Not So Silent Cinema live accompaniment. Fantastic!
Tourist Trap (1979)How is something this creepy rated PG?
Exorcist III (1989/90) dir William Peter BlattyExor---Holy shit, was that Patrick Ewing?
Halloween (1978 Dir. John Carpenter) What's the green mist in your cruiser?
Yakuza Apocalypse (2015) Dir. Takashi MiikeReally?! Seven words for this Miike film?!
The Hand That Rocks the Cradle (1992) Not quite horror. More like Lifetime Original.
Jason X Jason's look is a little Kane Hodder-ry
Knock Knock (2015)Did Eli Roth just go full DePalma?OrAny movie playing Pixies songs gets points.
Scooby-Doo: A XXX Parody (2011)The Gang got distracted alot this episode.
Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones (2014)Our dog was unimpressed by levitation scene.
The Monster Squad (1987)I need more monsters in my life.
Project Vampire (1993) Dir. Peter FlynnA perfect representation of early 90's b-movie.
Shaun of the Dead (2004)Yeah, I think I'll go with Yvonne.
Deadly Friend (1986) Cute yellow robot named BB? Seems familiar...
Haxen: Witchcraft Throughout the Ages (1922)Not nearly enough Demon butter churning innuendos.
Teeth (2007, Dir. Mitchell Lichtenstein)Alternate Title: Fuuuuuuck that shit: The Movie.
Knock Knock (2015)A good Eli Roth movie! Welcome back!
The Howling (1981)Surprisingly clever and taut. Sweet werewolf effects!
Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare (1991)Great cast, promising start, gets too Zane-y.
The Shining (1980, Stanley Kubrick)Uses Nicholson's terrible acting to comic perfection.
Fright Night (1985)Give Evil Ed all the Oscars now
Cursed (2005)Greerwolf kills girls. See you next, Wednesday.
The Stranger (2015)Eli Roth presents bad acting, boring vampires.
This comment has been removed by the author.
In the Dark (2015)Make my sacrifice matter. Don't watch this.
Only Lovers Left Alive (2013)Vampires, Jarmusch-style. They, like, drink people.
Tremors (1990)The plan worth making is watching this.
Housebound (2014)Both Eugene and Teddy Ruxpin are perverts
The Fly (1986)
ReplyDeleteNever, ever, let Cronenberg deliver your baby.
Rosemary's Baby (1968)
ReplyDeleteMaude is creepier without Cat Stevens music
The Birds (1963)
ReplyDeleteMade me want to dropkick some seagulls.
Child's Play 2 (1990)
ReplyDeleteLight punishment Andy for Fuck You Bitch.
From Dusk Till Dawn (1996)
ReplyDelete♪ Hot air hangs like a dead man... ♪
Eraserhead (1977)
ReplyDeleteThe strangest safe sex advert ever made
The Black Cat (2007)
ReplyDeleteThis particular cat was a total asshole.
THE CHILL FACTOR, aka DEMON POSSESSED (1989/1993, Amazon Prime) for the first time.
ReplyDeleteNobody'll be seated during demonic snowmobile chase!
Jean Rollins' REQUIEM FOR A VAMPIRE (1971, Amazon Prime) for the first time.
ReplyDeleteDrac's lieutenants blow wad making Skinemax flick.
Eden Log (2007)
ReplyDeleteSurely not entertaining, but at least interesting.
David Cronenberg's THE BROOD (1979, Hulu's Criterion Channel) for the first time.
ReplyDeleteSeriously, David, what's your ex really like?
Eden Lake (2008)
ReplyDeleteKelly Reilly kicks white trash kids asses
or
Fassbender will never suffer like this again
Corpse Bride (2005)
ReplyDeleteFinally a family friendly tale of necrophilia
5 Dolls for an August Moon (1970)
ReplyDeleteThe case of Danger Five gets murdered.
Apollo 18 (2011)
ReplyDeleteSpoiler: the Secretary of Defense did it.
Saint (2010)
ReplyDeleteDutch Santa is a real St. Dick.
Berberian Sound Studio (2012)
ReplyDeleteToby Jones becomes a cabbage serial murderer
Zombeavers (2014)
ReplyDeleteBest beaver pun still goes to Nielsen.
Nosferatu the Vampyre (1979)
ReplyDeleteAlso known as: "Klaus Kinski's home movies"
Tremors 5: Bloodlines (2015)
ReplyDeleteJamie Kennedy Experiment: Endure this movie. Couldn't.
The Blob (1988)
ReplyDeleteThat is one industrial strength garbage disposal!
3-2-1 Contact: The Bloodhound Gang: The Case of the Cackling Ghost (1980 TV) Dir. Unknown
ReplyDeleteNot enough ghost cackling for my taste.
a serbian movie (2010) - oh my! not visiting Serbia this year
ReplyDeleteCreep (2014) - an akward study in akwardness: akward result
ReplyDeleteYou spelled awkward wrong 3 times
DeleteTales from the Crypt [S01E03] - Dig That Cat...He's Real Gone (1989)
ReplyDeleteThe lucrative deaths/resurrections of Joey Pants.
Hellraiser (1987)
ReplyDeletePinhead perforates people particularly painfully. Perfectly putrid.
Dark Was The Night (2015)
ReplyDeleteBrooding performances give way to bad CGI.
Let the right one in (2008)
ReplyDeleteLet her in but let me OUT!
Roger Cousineau
Quebec, Canada
Friday the 13th Part 5: A New Beginning (1985)
ReplyDeleteJuwanna mann
Enchilada man
Diarrhea duet
Fan
Knock Knock (2015)
ReplyDeleteKnock knock. Who's there? Watch something else.
Child's Play 3 (1991)
ReplyDeleteSatan Mountain is currently closed for refurbishments.
Grabbers (2012)
ReplyDeleteMonster squids are allergic to Irish drunks
Triangle (2009)
ReplyDeleteGood film aptly requires repeat...repeat viewings.
Pandorum (2009)
ReplyDeleteThere is nothing but darkness out here.
Exorcismus (2010)
ReplyDeleteBeing a teenager equals demonic possession? Ayuh.
The Exorcist III (1990)
ReplyDeleteJust take a little off the top.
The Canal (2014)
ReplyDeleteThat car needed childproof locks me thinks!
ATM (2012)
ReplyDeleteJust going to the bank is scarier.
Terrorvision (1986)
ReplyDeleteI don't want to talk about it.
The Terminator (1984)
ReplyDeleteGot me burnin' in the third degree.
The House of the Devil (2009)
ReplyDeleteThe Adventures of Babysitting with Ti West
He Knows You're Alone (1980)
ReplyDeleteJust enough Turner, could have used Hooch.
Nurse 3D (2012)
ReplyDeletePaz heading into or emerging from stroke.
Unfriended (2015)
ReplyDeleteThe best theatrical horror movie of 2015.
Monkey Shines (1988)
ReplyDeleteTitle accurately evaluates all performances in film.
Wishmaster (1997)
ReplyDeleteWish this didn't stink. Genies are bullshit.
R.L. Stine's Monsterville: Cabinet of Souls (2015)
ReplyDeleteEnjoyed it until the clown showed up.
From Dusk till Dawn (1996)
ReplyDeleteDecapitated bodies make for great electric guitars!
My scifi-horror instance for today ended with:
ReplyDeleteEvent Horizon (1997)
Paul Anderson is still a trashy director.
Sleepaway Camp (1983)
ReplyDeleteSing to severed head while naked. Same.
The Vatican Tapes (2015) Dir. Mark Neveldine
ReplyDeleteWould have rather heard Pope Francis' mixtape.
Orca (1977)
ReplyDeleteIf Jaws and [Free] Willy had a baby.
Tourist Trap (1979)
ReplyDeleteThe reason that mannequins should terrify you.
Popcorn (1991)
ReplyDeleteA movie made by people from Mars.
Blade: Trinity (2007, Dir. David Goyer)
ReplyDeleteAlso known as - Patton Oswald: Basketball Superstar
Spring (2014)
ReplyDeleteThis remake of Before Sunrise is strange!
Reel Horror (1985)
ReplyDeleteDisparate SOV features cut together. Doesn't work.
Neon Maniacs (1986)
ReplyDeleteAmazon Prime wins again! Great 80s flick.
It Follows (2014)
ReplyDeleteStalked and brutally killed? Totally worth it.
Ravenous(1999)
ReplyDeleteOne mans meal is, well, another man.
John Carpenter's Vampires (1998) dir. See Above
ReplyDeleteJohn Carpenter imitates John Carpenter, nearly succeeds.
A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child
ReplyDeleteWhere Freddy joins the Planned Parenthood debate.
Last Shift (2014) Dir. Anthony DiBlasi
ReplyDeleteIgnore artwork. Surprisingly good! 5.1 a must.
and
Tired of generic scenes cheapening good films.
Final Destination (2000):
ReplyDeleteIf only Eminem would've written back sooner.
Westworld (1973)
ReplyDeleteThe Gunslinger inspired slasher movie bad guys
The Funhouse (1981)
ReplyDeleteSo that kid definitely got diddled right?
Human Experiments (1979)
ReplyDeleteWhy didn't she just call Charles Raine?
I Miss You, Hugs and Kisses (1978)
ReplyDeleteElke Sommer should've stuck with Mario Bava.
Inferno (1980)
ReplyDeleteMostly style. No substance. All Dario Argento.
Killer Nun (1979)
ReplyDeleteOpening for Slipknot on the next tour.
Vampyr (1932)
ReplyDeleteNot So Silent Cinema live accompaniment. Fantastic!
Tourist Trap (1979)
ReplyDeleteHow is something this creepy rated PG?
Exorcist III (1989/90) dir William Peter Blatty
ReplyDeleteExor---Holy shit, was that Patrick Ewing?
Halloween (1978 Dir. John Carpenter)
ReplyDeleteWhat's the green mist in your cruiser?
Yakuza Apocalypse (2015) Dir. Takashi Miike
ReplyDeleteReally?! Seven words for this Miike film?!
The Hand That Rocks the Cradle (1992)
ReplyDeleteNot quite horror. More like Lifetime Original.
Jason X
ReplyDeleteJason's look is a little Kane Hodder-ry
Knock Knock (2015)
ReplyDeleteDid Eli Roth just go full DePalma?
Or
Any movie playing Pixies songs gets points.
Scooby-Doo: A XXX Parody (2011)
ReplyDeleteThe Gang got distracted alot this episode.
Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones (2014)
ReplyDeleteOur dog was unimpressed by levitation scene.
The Monster Squad (1987)
ReplyDeleteI need more monsters in my life.
Project Vampire (1993) Dir. Peter Flynn
ReplyDeleteA perfect representation of early 90's b-movie.
Shaun of the Dead (2004)
ReplyDeleteYeah, I think I'll go with Yvonne.
Deadly Friend (1986)
ReplyDeleteCute yellow robot named BB? Seems familiar...
Haxen: Witchcraft Throughout the Ages (1922)
ReplyDeleteNot nearly enough Demon butter churning innuendos.
Teeth (2007, Dir. Mitchell Lichtenstein)
ReplyDeleteAlternate Title: Fuuuuuuck that shit: The Movie.
Knock Knock (2015)
ReplyDeleteA good Eli Roth movie! Welcome back!
The Howling (1981)
ReplyDeleteSurprisingly clever and taut. Sweet werewolf effects!
Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare (1991)
ReplyDeleteGreat cast, promising start, gets too Zane-y.
The Shining (1980, Stanley Kubrick)
ReplyDeleteUses Nicholson's terrible acting to comic perfection.
Fright Night (1985)
ReplyDeleteGive Evil Ed all the Oscars now
Fright Night (1985)
ReplyDeleteGive Evil Ed all the Oscars now
Cursed (2005)
ReplyDeleteGreerwolf kills girls. See you next, Wednesday.
The Stranger (2015)
ReplyDeleteEli Roth presents bad acting, boring vampires.
This comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteIn the Dark (2015)
ReplyDeleteMake my sacrifice matter. Don't watch this.
Only Lovers Left Alive (2013)
ReplyDeleteVampires, Jarmusch-style. They, like, drink people.
Tremors (1990)
ReplyDeleteThe plan worth making is watching this.
Housebound (2014)
ReplyDeleteBoth Eugene and Teddy Ruxpin are perverts