Friday, June 3, 2016

Netflix This Movie! Vol. 180

by Patrick Bromley
Your next round of #Junesploitation picks!

June 4: Kung Fu! - While Netflix has been frustratingly lax about updating a lot of their catalogue of titles available for streaming, one of the genres in which they've added a number of films is their martial arts library. You've got plenty to choose from, whether it's The Five Deadly Venoms (1978, dir. Cheh Chang) or Five Elements Ninjas (1982, dir. Cheh Chang) or Invincible Shaolin (1978, dir. Cheh Chang) or Five Shaolin Masters (1974, dir. Cheh Chang). I'll be honest -- I've only seen one of those four titles, but you better believe I will have seen a few more by the end of Kung fu day.
June 5: Zombies! - Very few (if any) "classic" zombie films available on Netflix right now. I'd go with either Dead Snow 2: Red vs. Dead (2014, dir. Tommy Wirkola) -- which also works for Nazi day -- or Wyrmwood: Road of the Dead (2015, dir. Kiah Roache-Turner), one of the most fun zombie movies to come along in a while. Too bad we don't have an Ozploitation category this year.
June 6: Scream Queens! - Again, the offerings are pretty rough. Your best bets would be Re-Animator (1985, dir. Stuart Gordon), which gives Barbara Crampton one of her earliest and best roles, or Cujo (1983, dir. Lewis Teague) starring Dee Wallace.
June 7: Cars! - Drive Hard (2014, dir. Brian Trenchard-Smith) is a ridiculous movie about John Cusack and Thomas Jane trapped in a car together directed by one of the all-time greats of exploitation cinema. The movie is not great, but you could do worse.
June 8: Free space! - When in doubt, watch The Warriors (1979, dir. Walter Hill). It will make your life better no matter how many times you've seen it.
June 9: Animals! - There's a title on Netflix called Zoombies (2015, dir. Glenn Miller) that I haven't seen (and might not see), but it's about killer animals and certainly fits the bill for today. Or you could watch Cujo again.
June 10: Sexploitation! - The choices available on Netflix for this category are especially miserable, consisting primarily of DTV sequels to American Pie and Van Wilder and Bachelor Party and Revenge of the Nerds; not surprisingly, none of the originals can be found. I guess you can watch Basic Instinct or Bound, but not the great one from the Wachowskis. This is like the Asylum version of Fifty Shades of Grey, recommended only for those who want to see Charisma Carpenter erotically dominated. There's always Gaspar Noe's Love if you want your pretentious French art film fix, but that movie has hardcore scenes, so be warned.


  1. Netflix has been very disappointing lately. Sure they just added the Jurassic Park movies, but we all own those. Who cares?

    Brian Collins dug Zoombies, which makes me curious to check it out. He says it's mostly a Jurassic World rip off, but is better than Jurassic World. Of course, that's not exactly a tall order.

  2. Love is one of my least favorite movies of the year, I thought it sucked, big time. It offers nothing which is typical of Noe after the amazing one-two-punch of I Stand Alone and Irreversible. Since those, I hated Enter the Void and Love.

    Wyrmwood is AWESOME and I'm tired of Zombie films. This one is legit!

  3. Did anyone see that Use Boll made a sequel to Rampage, titled Rampage: Capital Punishment. I actually really enjoyed the first. I stopped the sequel about 30 minutes in...

  4. I was planning on streaming Eyes Wide Shut for Sexploitation day.

  5. Wyrmwood IS really good.
    I'll be gone all day, and evening for Kung Fu Day :( and I have at least 10 titles that I've been meaning to watch. Maybe I'll squeeze one in after midnight tonight. There are the "free days" too.

  6. Also, I noticed that Fearless (2006) is on Netflix. It is my favorite Jet Li movie. Recommended. It's a period piece, and is loosely about a cocky fighter that is humbled and has to find redemption. A central theme is the "true meaning of the martial arts".