The Spiral Staircase (1945)Why's this so undersung?! The first slasher!
The Silence of the Lambs (1991)About "mail gays"? I don't get it.
Night Train Murders (1975)Should've stayed outta the die-ning car! UGH
A Bucket of Blood (1959)A real cool cat, ya dig daddy-o
The Whisperer in Darkness (2011)Outstanding! Though another bad dose of Claymation.
La Horde (2009)Gangsters vs Unstoppable Evil? Needs Busta Rhymes
Shocker (1989)Wait until Mulder finds out about this!
The Evil Dead (1981):See Shyamalan, trees can actually be scary.
Blue VelvetDoes Roger Ebert hate all great horror?
The Thing (1982)No, seriously guys. I love him, but...
Black Christmas (1974)The Killers Dennis Miller's impersonation is terrible
Return of the Living Dead (1985)Tarman! There's no need to feel down!
Crazy Lips (2000)Fun!...Wait...SHIT! Thanks AGAIN, rape.
Crazy Lips (2000)Fun!...Oh, wait...SHIT! Thanks AGAIN, rapeP.S. bad at counting I will be more careful
The Fury (1978)That Amy Irving's career should really explode!
The Wicker Man (2006)"Reeeady! Ready for the bee ride, baaabyyy"!
Neon Demon (2016)Does the five-second rule apply to eyeballs?
Pontypool (2009)Too bad Americans don't learn a second language.
Persona (1966)Ingmar, hollar when you're done dicking around.
Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers (1989)The signs say this kid's in trouble.
The Fly (1958)Pesky cat? Trust Delambre and West Extermination!
Next Of Kin (1982)"Piss on 'em" are great last words
Catacombs (1988) AKA Curse IV: The Ultimate Sacrifice Pino Donaggio's score can't save this bore.
Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters (2013)Bloody fun. Shades of Raimi and Jackson.
The Innocents (1961)Hey! Governess! Leave those creepy kids alone!
The Devil's Rejects (2005)A new found appreciation for tootie frootie!
Body Bags (1993) Here's why most directors don't also act.
The Beyond (1983)Fulci Fulci Fulci can't you see? Hypnotized.
Basket Case (1982)The tragic origin of Slimer from Ghostbusters.
lol
The CurseBest horror film with a banjo score?
Dead End Drive-In (1986)Eerily prescient Australian film of Trump presidency!
The House Of The Devil (2009)A harpsichord?!?! Get the fuck outta there!!
What We Become (2015)Parents eat pet. Child eats parents. Karma.
What Have You Done to Solange? (1972) seventies wives forgave adultery with minors fast!
Jacob's Ladder (1990)The sequel to Home Alone we deserve
Acolytes (2008)Aussie serial killer thriller's twists go counterclockwise
Don't Breathe (2016)Where's Kevin McCallister when you need him?
The Curse of Werewolf (1961)Not for everyone... but definitely for me.
Friday The 13TH:The Final Chapter (1984)Comic Book Men is still on...Frightening!
Frankenhooker (1990) Mom! Phineas and Ferb are reanimating corpses!
The Thing (1982)In Antarctica we speak American! Crazy Swedes.
Nina ForeverWell that's one way to earn redwings.
The Thing (1982)Helicopter and grenades vs dog: dog wins
The Dead Zone (1983)Stephen King adaptations are just the best.
Bay of Blood 1971 Bava Bay Party, bring your own Spear!
The VVitch (2015)Selling daughter? Black Phillip makes an offer!orThey're all dead. Why are you whispering?
Ghosthouse (1988)Miss breaking and entering on camping trips....
Nina ForeverIs it still cockblocking if she jerks?
Hellraiser (1987)I sell Gremlins and magic puzzle boxes.
Cloverfield (2008) He's going to Japan? No monsters there...
You're NextGood, but aren't commercials more entertaining nowadays?
C.H.U.D.Are they still cannibals if they're mutants?
Life After Beth (2014) Starts sad, gets silly, then sad again.
Drag Me to Hell (2009)Never wear big-buttoned coats when fighting gypsies.
Consent (2010)Titillating porno plot makes for disturbing reality
Don't Breathe (2016)Starring John McClane after Die Hard 20.
Hocus Pocus (1993):SJP weirdly still looks like a shoe
Tucker & Dale vs. Evil (2010)One of those rare great horror comedies.
Resident Evil: Afterlife (2010)A stupid, fun romp. I needed that.
The Innkeepers (2012) Lena Dunham is friends with Ti West?
<<RWD (2015)The cast seemed to be having fun.
Deliverance(1972)Blazing banjos and squealing pigs?....road trip!
Troll 2So endearing, I forgot why it's bad.
Chopping Mall (1986)Nothing in this movie is ever chopped.
The Conjuring 2 (2016)Jesus Christ dude CHOP OFF THE LOCK!(Side note, let's just cool it with the era (era) specific pop music in every period movie. Like, we get it guys. And no more London Calling. Ever.)
The Conjuring 2Haunted house? Take down that creepy teepee
Shaun of the Dead (2004)Best line ever: "They're a bit bitey..."
Contracted (2013)Whole lotta NOPES from start to finish!
PiecesThe title of this movie is puzzling...
Truth or Dare?: A Critical Madness (1986)Holy shit, what a great fucking title!andHoly shit, what a great fucking film!
the Unborn (2009)Wish this had been called the Unmade.
The Houses October Built (2014)Not the worst, but not the best.
Dagon (2001)Just accept fate of the fish lovers.
Lifeforce (1985)♫ There's a starwoman objectified in the sky ♫
Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives (1986)1.21 Gigawatts into Jason, flux capacity fluxxing
Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives (1986)1.21 Gigawatts into Jason, flux capacitor fluxxing
Black Sabbath (1963)That corpse is second after Aunt Zelda.
Cat People (1982)That panther looks just like Malcolm McDowell.
Dr. Hackenstein (1989) It's wacky, whimsical. Phyllis Diller's in it!
Bubba Ho-Tep (20002)Hail to the king has new meaning
Final Destination (2000)Enjoyed time spent on mythology. Others lacking.
The Collector (2009)Holy shit I wasn't prepared for that.
Ginger Snaps (2000)Starring Katharine Isabelle and a talking sweater.
Re-Animator (1985)Mountain Dew, it's not just for allnighters!
A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)Who wears sweaters in a boiler room?!
Queen of the Damned (2002)Ohhhhh so many early-aught douche chills.
Alien (1979)Still the most terrifying creature ever conceived.
The Wailing (2016) Stop playing ping pong with my emotions!
Child's Play (1988)Chucky could turn me on without batteries.
Berberian Sound StudioAstron-6's The Editor played straight. Not good...
Truth or Dare 2: Wicked Games (1994)Whoa, this is a franchise?! 3 more...
Irreversible (2003)Memento...if made by Friday 5 director.
In the Mouth of Madness (1994)Carpenter shows his love of the craft.
Weresquito Nazi Hunter (2015)"A History of Violence" Meets "The Fly"
Hellions (2015)Trick r Treat Sam has family reunion.
Slaughter HighMark Slaughter never showed up. False advertising.
Evil Dead (1981)Forgot how peppy this was, like Psycho.
INSIDIOUS (2010)There's a creepy lady in the Further...
PRISON (1988)There's some STELLAR gore gags in this.
The Spiral Staircase (1945)
ReplyDeleteWhy's this so undersung?! The first slasher!
The Silence of the Lambs (1991)
ReplyDeleteAbout "mail gays"? I don't get it.
Night Train Murders (1975)
ReplyDeleteShould've stayed outta the die-ning car! UGH
A Bucket of Blood (1959)
ReplyDeleteA real cool cat, ya dig daddy-o
The Whisperer in Darkness (2011)
ReplyDeleteOutstanding! Though another bad dose of Claymation.
La Horde (2009)
ReplyDeleteGangsters vs Unstoppable Evil? Needs Busta Rhymes
Shocker (1989)
ReplyDeleteWait until Mulder finds out about this!
The Evil Dead (1981):
ReplyDeleteSee Shyamalan, trees can actually be scary.
Blue Velvet
ReplyDeleteDoes Roger Ebert hate all great horror?
The Thing (1982)
DeleteNo, seriously guys. I love him, but...
Black Christmas (1974)
ReplyDeleteThe Killers Dennis Miller's impersonation is terrible
Return of the Living Dead (1985)
ReplyDeleteTarman! There's no need to feel down!
Crazy Lips (2000)
ReplyDeleteFun!...Wait...SHIT! Thanks AGAIN, rape.
Crazy Lips (2000)
DeleteFun!...Oh, wait...SHIT! Thanks AGAIN, rape
P.S. bad at counting I will be more careful
The Fury (1978)
ReplyDeleteThat Amy Irving's career should really explode!
The Wicker Man (2006)
ReplyDelete"Reeeady! Ready for the bee ride, baaabyyy"!
Neon Demon (2016)
ReplyDeleteDoes the five-second rule apply to eyeballs?
Pontypool (2009)
ReplyDeleteToo bad Americans don't learn a second language.
Persona (1966)
ReplyDeleteIngmar, hollar when you're done dicking around.
Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers (1989)
ReplyDeleteThe signs say this kid's in trouble.
The Fly (1958)
ReplyDeletePesky cat? Trust Delambre and West Extermination!
Next Of Kin (1982)
ReplyDelete"Piss on 'em" are great last words
Catacombs (1988) AKA Curse IV: The Ultimate Sacrifice
ReplyDeletePino Donaggio's score can't save this bore.
Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters (2013)
ReplyDeleteBloody fun. Shades of Raimi and Jackson.
The Innocents (1961)
ReplyDeleteHey! Governess! Leave those creepy kids alone!
The Devil's Rejects (2005)
ReplyDeleteA new found appreciation for tootie frootie!
Body Bags (1993)
ReplyDeleteHere's why most directors don't also act.
The Beyond (1983)
ReplyDeleteFulci Fulci Fulci can't you see? Hypnotized.
Basket Case (1982)
ReplyDeleteThe tragic origin of Slimer from Ghostbusters.
lol
DeleteThe Curse
ReplyDeleteBest horror film with a banjo score?
Dead End Drive-In (1986)
ReplyDeleteEerily prescient Australian film of Trump presidency!
The House Of The Devil (2009)
ReplyDeleteA harpsichord?!?! Get the fuck outta there!!
What We Become (2015)
ReplyDeleteParents eat pet. Child eats parents. Karma.
What Have You Done to Solange? (1972)
ReplyDeleteseventies wives forgave adultery with minors fast!
Jacob's Ladder (1990)
ReplyDeleteThe sequel to Home Alone we deserve
Acolytes (2008)
ReplyDeleteAussie serial killer thriller's twists go counterclockwise
Don't Breathe (2016)
ReplyDeleteWhere's Kevin McCallister when you need him?
The Curse of Werewolf (1961)
ReplyDeleteNot for everyone... but definitely for me.
Friday The 13TH:The Final Chapter (1984)
ReplyDeleteComic Book Men is still on...Frightening!
Frankenhooker (1990)
ReplyDeleteMom! Phineas and Ferb are reanimating corpses!
The Thing (1982)
ReplyDeleteIn Antarctica we speak American! Crazy Swedes.
Nina Forever
ReplyDeleteWell that's one way to earn redwings.
The Thing (1982)
ReplyDeleteHelicopter and grenades vs dog: dog wins
The Dead Zone (1983)
ReplyDeleteStephen King adaptations are just the best.
Bay of Blood 1971
ReplyDeleteBava Bay Party, bring your own Spear!
The VVitch (2015)
ReplyDeleteSelling daughter? Black Phillip makes an offer!
or
They're all dead. Why are you whispering?
Ghosthouse (1988)
ReplyDeleteMiss breaking and entering on camping trips....
Nina Forever
ReplyDeleteIs it still cockblocking if she jerks?
Hellraiser (1987)
ReplyDeleteI sell Gremlins and magic puzzle boxes.
Cloverfield (2008)
ReplyDeleteHe's going to Japan? No monsters there...
You're Next
ReplyDeleteGood, but aren't commercials more entertaining nowadays?
C.H.U.D.
ReplyDeleteAre they still cannibals if they're mutants?
Life After Beth (2014)
ReplyDeleteStarts sad, gets silly, then sad again.
Drag Me to Hell (2009)
ReplyDeleteNever wear big-buttoned coats when fighting gypsies.
Consent (2010)
ReplyDeleteTitillating porno plot makes for disturbing reality
Don't Breathe (2016)
ReplyDeleteStarring John McClane after Die Hard 20.
Hocus Pocus (1993):
ReplyDeleteSJP weirdly still looks like a shoe
Tucker & Dale vs. Evil (2010)
ReplyDeleteOne of those rare great horror comedies.
Resident Evil: Afterlife (2010)
ReplyDeleteA stupid, fun romp. I needed that.
The Innkeepers (2012)
ReplyDeleteLena Dunham is friends with Ti West?
<<RWD (2015)
ReplyDeleteThe cast seemed to be having fun.
Deliverance(1972)
ReplyDeleteBlazing banjos and squealing pigs?....road trip!
Troll 2
ReplyDeleteSo endearing, I forgot why it's bad.
Chopping Mall (1986)
ReplyDeleteNothing in this movie is ever chopped.
The Conjuring 2 (2016)
ReplyDeleteJesus Christ dude CHOP OFF THE LOCK!
(Side note, let's just cool it with the era (era) specific pop music in every period movie. Like, we get it guys. And no more London Calling. Ever.)
The Conjuring 2
ReplyDeleteHaunted house? Take down that creepy teepee
Shaun of the Dead (2004)
ReplyDeleteBest line ever: "They're a bit bitey..."
Contracted (2013)
ReplyDeleteWhole lotta NOPES from start to finish!
Pieces
ReplyDeleteThe title of this movie is puzzling...
Truth or Dare?: A Critical Madness (1986)
ReplyDeleteHoly shit, what a great fucking title!
and
Holy shit, what a great fucking film!
the Unborn (2009)
ReplyDeleteWish this had been called the Unmade.
The Houses October Built (2014)
ReplyDeleteNot the worst, but not the best.
Dagon (2001)
ReplyDeleteJust accept fate of the fish lovers.
Lifeforce (1985)
ReplyDelete♫ There's a starwoman objectified in the sky ♫
Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives (1986)
ReplyDelete1.21 Gigawatts into Jason, flux capacity fluxxing
Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives (1986)
Delete1.21 Gigawatts into Jason, flux capacitor fluxxing
Black Sabbath (1963)
ReplyDeleteThat corpse is second after Aunt Zelda.
Cat People (1982)
ReplyDeleteThat panther looks just like Malcolm McDowell.
Dr. Hackenstein (1989)
ReplyDeleteIt's wacky, whimsical. Phyllis Diller's in it!
Bubba Ho-Tep (20002)
ReplyDeleteHail to the king has new meaning
Final Destination (2000)
ReplyDeleteEnjoyed time spent on mythology. Others lacking.
The Collector (2009)
ReplyDeleteHoly shit I wasn't prepared for that.
Ginger Snaps (2000)
ReplyDeleteStarring Katharine Isabelle and a talking sweater.
Re-Animator (1985)
ReplyDeleteMountain Dew, it's not just for allnighters!
A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)
ReplyDeleteWho wears sweaters in a boiler room?!
Queen of the Damned (2002)
ReplyDeleteOhhhhh so many early-aught douche chills.
Alien (1979)
ReplyDeleteStill the most terrifying creature ever conceived.
The Wailing (2016)
ReplyDeleteStop playing ping pong with my emotions!
Child's Play (1988)
ReplyDeleteChucky could turn me on without batteries.
Berberian Sound Studio
ReplyDeleteAstron-6's The Editor played straight. Not good...
Truth or Dare 2: Wicked Games (1994)
ReplyDeleteWhoa, this is a franchise?! 3 more...
Irreversible (2003)
ReplyDeleteMemento...if made by Friday 5 director.
In the Mouth of Madness (1994)
ReplyDeleteCarpenter shows his love of the craft.
Weresquito Nazi Hunter (2015)
ReplyDelete"A History of Violence" Meets "The Fly"
Hellions (2015)
ReplyDeleteTrick r Treat Sam has family reunion.
Slaughter High
ReplyDeleteMark Slaughter never showed up. False advertising.
Evil Dead (1981)
ReplyDeleteForgot how peppy this was, like Psycho.
INSIDIOUS (2010)
ReplyDeleteThere's a creepy lady in the Further...
PRISON (1988)
ReplyDeleteThere's some STELLAR gore gags in this.