PLUTONIUM BABY (1987) on Amazon Prime for the first time.'A Troma Team Release'? Oh, fuck me.
DEATHGASM (2015) on Netflix Instant for the first time.Playing song backwards saves the day? Genius!
THE ELEVENTH COMMANDMENT (1986) on Amazon Prime for the first time."Dallas" plus "Stepfather" plus ""Burning" equals ZZZzzz...or'Thou shalt not waste vote on Trump.'
The Hoarder (2015)So that's what's in those storage units.
The Witch (2015 or 2016?)New England tween signs goat devil yearbook.
A Bell from Hell (1973)Extremely underappreciated; Mondo Macabro should re-release this!
Day of the Dead (1985)That's a pretty... brain you've got there.
Maniac Cop (1988)A lot of cops, not much maniac.
Pieces (1982)Guess who's coming out of the closet!
Strip Nude For Your Killer (1975)Mom?! It's an art film, I swear!
Nighbreed (1990)Full of freaks, Cronenberg's still the creepiest.
Tenebrae (1982)Maybe don't ask a dog for directions.
Island Claws (1980)Me? I'd serve giant, killer crab legs.
What We Do In The Shadows (2014)Just made me feel happy all over.
The Pit (1981)I wish my childhood was this cool.
Nightmare (1964, Hammer)Smart, noirish chiller that progressivly unnerves audience.
Night Creatures, AKA Captain Clegg (1962)Pirates, Marsh Phantoms, living scarecrows. Plus Cushing!
Amityville 3-D (1983) in 2-D"For God's Sake, Don't Watch This Shit!"
Halloween: Resurrection (2002)Busta! The hero we need now. #Bustaforpresident2016
What We Become (2015)True evil is family. Nope, it's zombies!
The Purge: Election Year (2016)Well I'm voting for Frank Grillo - Independent
Evil Dead 2: Dead By Dawn (1987)Cabin + book + demons + Bruce - hand + chainsaw = Awesome
Judges... do '+,' '=,' etc. count as words? I hope they don't, but as of right now I think they do count as words. Appeal?
If they do count, then I'll have to re-do my Greasy Strangler review from a few days ago
I hope they don't or my math is all wrong ;)
Wyrmwood (2014): in Australia everything wants to kill you
Spirit Camp (2009) It's the worst. No, really. The WORST.
Dawn of the Dead (1980) Shop till you drop! Then shop again!
April Fool's Day (1986)Didn't see the ending coming. No fooling.
The Hills Have Eyes (1977) The dog's the movie's real hero, right?
Knock Knock (2015)Lost everything he had. Totally worth it.
Nightbreed (1990)Shame on me for expecting Hellraiser quality.
Let the right one in 2008 Nah fuck that, get the Hell out!
1408Not one damn Shining theory! Oh wait...
Dead of Night AKA Deathdream (1972)Everyone is oblivious to laconic zombie veteran.
Salem's Lot (1979)Questionable acting, flat aesthetics, fantastic head vampire.
Child's Play 2 (1990)Just waiting around until the factory scene...
SHRIEK IF YOU KNOW WHAT I DID LAST FRIDAY THE 13TH(2000) So many late '90s references. So... many...
Phenomena (1985)Came for Connelly, stayed for the monkey.
Re-Animator (1985)Worst security guard in the entire world
The Little Shop of Horrors (1960)Flowers with faces? Market as "Vanity Chia-Pets"!
Tales from the HoodNot convinced that mortician didn't have drugs
The Greasy Strangler (2016):"The Wetlands" starring old man's Giant Penis.
Cujo(1983)Damn, Beethoven has gone bat shit crazy!
Neon Demon (2016):Hollywood taught me: The prettier, the tastier.
To All A Goodnight (1980)Bummed the thespian, singing, dancing, girl lived.
American Psycho (2000)Higher moral standard than our presidential debate.
Se7en (1995)This was made for se7en word reviews.
Body PartsSo...what happened to Charley Fletcher's dick?
The Hidden (1987)MacLachlan should just join the feds already!
Psycho IV: The Beginning (1990)Nope, pretty sure this is the end.
Not exactly a scary movie, but here it is Shin Godzilla (2016)God(zilla)damn it's awesome
Friday the 13th Put On A Bikini For Your Killer
Burial GroundYou can end a movie like that?
The Invitation (2015)I have been to worse dinner parties.
The Skin I Live In (2011)Pedro Almodovar? More like Pedro Almo-Too-Far! Amirite?
Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978)Aliens invade to work boring desk jobs.
Troll 2 (1990)Am I allowed to like this unironically?
Jaws 2 (1978)Pro: Brody's legs / Con: Mayor's son lives
Black Sheep (2006)I just kept waiting for Chris Farley...
The Cabin in the Woods (2012): I still wish they'd chosen sexy witches.
Child's Play 3 (1991)Hold the door, Jack Bender directed this??
Hush (2016)Interesting concept, nicely shot, lacks execution, shhhh.
Altered (2006)There aren't enough alien abduction horror movies.
The Collection (2012)This series has great cliffhangers... and cojones.
The Exorcist III (1990) Wonderfully weird. More than a jump scare.
Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children (2016)Monsters eat children's eyeballs. It counts, folks.
Evil Dead II (1987)That Kandarian demon sounded like angry chimpanzees.
Silence of the Lambs: there weren't even any lambs to silence...
Candyman: Farewell to the Flesh (1995)Purchasing error. The spice does not flow.
Them (2006)Go toward the light...or maybe don't.
The InvitationMy dinner parties always end that way!
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