Monday, October 9, 2017

2017 Scary Movie Challenge Day 9


99 comments:

  1. THE GHOST OF YOTSUYA (1959) - A sword cannot cut through a ghost.

    It would make a good a pairing with KWAIDAN, particularly with the Edo period setting.

    JIGOKU (1960)- Hell sequence was bloody for its time.

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  2. It Follows (2014)
    I don't think that's how STDs work

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  3. My Bloody Valentine (1981)

    Roses're Red, dislodge eyeballs with miners pick.

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  4. The Burrowers (2008, dir. J.T. Petty)
    Smart script, bad moviemaking. Too damn complicated.

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  5. Dr. Jekyll and his Women (1981)

    So many naked butts! Is this horror?

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  6. Personal Shopper (2016)

    Eat sleep shop repeat and contacting spirits.

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  7. Drag Me to Hell (2009)

    Couldn’t powerful witch magic up some money?

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  8. The Green Inferno (2013)

    Taking inappropriate masturbating to the next level.

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  9. The Faculty (1998)
    "Pure uncut Columbus Ohio alien repellent powder."

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  10. House II (1987)

    The second story...didn't really need told.

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  11. FLATLINERS (2017)

    No...no...no...no...no...no...NO!!

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  12. Dread (2009, dir. Anthony DiBlasi)
    The dorkiest fucking shit ever. Worthless garbage.

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  13. The Wicker Man (1974)

    The Equalizer versus Count Dracula. Dracula wins.

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  14. Gerald's Game (2017)

    Weak ending. Scam artist butcher never caught.

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  15. In the Mouth of Madness (1995)

    You should floss more. This is disgusting.

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  16. Hellraiser (1987)

    Have you ever tasted Cenobites? They're delicious!

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  17. Cabin Fever (2002)
    "We get it Eli Roth! You're COOL!"

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  18. Shocker (1989)
    I need more Dudes of Wrath please.

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  19. Hounds of Love (2017)

    Wrong way to spice up sex life.

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  20. The Devils Candy (2015)
    Tracksuit satan ruins another Rex Manning day.

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  21. Knock Knock (2015)
    Look. We can dig a perfect rectangle.
    Or
    Knock Knock. Who’s there? A shitty ending.

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  22. The Blackcoat's Daughter (2015)
    Never do what walrus silhouettes tell you

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  23. Doghouse (2009, dir. Jake West)
    Fugly test run for The World's End.

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  24. Jungle Trap (1990 & 2016)

    Terror only your grandfather's camcorder can capture!

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  25. Freaked (1993)

    The '90s were a different time, man.

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  26. A Nightmare On Elm Street (1984)
    Sergeant stands way too close to lieutenant.

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  27. Gerald’s Game

    I am still wincing from *that* scene.

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  28. Gozu (2001)
    Ladle butt play? Pretty tame for Japan.

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  29. Hello Mary Lou: Prom Night II (1987)

    Hello Mary Lou the girl on fire.

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  30. The Cottage (2008, dir. Paul Andrew Williams)
    Stop trying to be clever, horror movies!!

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  31. 10 Cloverfield Lane (2016)

    John Goodman just want to play house.

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  32. My Bloody Valentine (1981)

    Killer to beer-drinking Canucks: Be MINE

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  33. Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers (1995):

    Balls-out goofiness breathes life into tired franchise.

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  34. Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (1921)

    Cabinet shows excellent workmanship/attention to detail.

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  35. The People Under The Stairs (1991)

    Department of Children and Families failed spectacularly.

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  36. Suburban Gothic (2014)

    Alt-punk paranormal comedy is mostly fine.

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  37. Day of the Dead (1985)

    Will never be irrelevant. A true masterpiece.

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  38. Strangeland (1998)

    Those insisting I revisit might be wrong.

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  39. The Loved Ones (2010)

    Another reason coffee over tea for me.

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  40. The People Under Stairs (1991)

    The Department of Children and Families failed spectacularly.

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  41. From Beyond (1986): Came for Crampton, stayed for the amoebas.

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  42. Scary Movie 3 (2003): Sheen's least embarrassing venture in twenty years.

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  43. The Thing (1982): Did Brimley take this as diabetic parable?

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  44. The Fog (1981): Despite looks and broken window, Atkins scores.

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  45. Wes Craven's New Nightmare (1994)
    One, two, Freddy's going meta on you.

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  46. The Beyond (1981)

    Striking visuals. Don't know what is happening.

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  47. Friday the 13th part 5:
    Tommy! Jason! Tommy! Jason! Paramedic? Tommy! Jason!

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  48. Quatermass and the Pit aka Five Million Years to Earth (1967)

    Scientist essentials: tweed jacket, impeccably groomed beard.

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  49. Halloween H20: Twenty Years Later (1998):

    Does Michael get shorter in each movie?

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  50. A Nightmare On Elm Street 5: Dream Child (1989)

    So bad, so bad, oh so bad.

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  51. A Ghost Story (2017)

    Explicitly visualizes the horror of pie eating

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  52. The American Scream (2012)

    **crosses ‘cry during Halloween documentary’ off list**

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  53. Brokeback Mountain (2005)

    Alt-right nightmare featuring cowboys and little blood.

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  54. Raw (2017)

    Would be easier to stomach with ketchup

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  55. Humongous 1982

    Dog bites face and Donna shows Boobs

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  56. You're Next

    Australians kick ass in handling stressful situations.

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  57. Monster of Frankenstein (1981)

    In which the monster stubs his Toei.

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  58. The Leprechaun (1993)

    The One With The Girl From FRIENDS

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  59. Knock Knock (2015)

    Knob slob leads Keanu to shoulder throb.

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  60. Child’s Play 2 (1990)

    Super watchable. Chucky’s demise is the BEST.

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  61. Leprechaun (1993)

    We need to talk about Rachel’s shorts.

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  62. Day of the Dead (1985)

    I think the world needs more Bub.

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  63. House of the Devil (2009)

    Beautiful, terrifying, cool as hell. Instant classic.

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  64. Tomb of Dracula (1980)

    Boston Dracula? Put garlic in your Guinness.

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  65. Candyman (1992)

    Features my second worst public toilet experience.

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  66. The Black Cat (1934): Karloff, a graceful walker. Lugosi, enigmatic talker.

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  67. Halloween: Resurrection (2002):

    Lost me at "His larynx was crushed."

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  68. The Omen (1976)

    Atticus Finch doesn't always raise great kids.

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  69. The Slumber Party Massacre (1982)

    Cornucopia of tastelessness, bad acting and direction

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  70. Lord of Illusions (1995) Dir. Clive Barker

    Probably Barker's weakest film, still really fun.

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  71. The Last Man on Earth (1964) in Color

    Dying daughter...'no school for her today'

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  72. Bone Tomahawk (2015)

    Directorial debuts can't really get much better.

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  73. The White Of The Eye (1987)

    It’s got everything from audiophiles to necrophiles!

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  74. Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey (1991)
    Make sure evil robots are certified uppercut-proof.

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  75. Trick or Treats (1982)

    “He’s upstairs playing, probably making a bomb..”

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  76. The Orphanage (2007)
    Soul-crushing depression inducing, there goes my week.

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  77. Without Warning (1980)

    If it bleeds, we blow it up!

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  78. Final Exam (1981)

    Has there been a more unremarkable slasher?

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  79. The Inkeepers (2011)

    Advice: if hotel is haunted, just leave.

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  80. Just Before Dawn (1981)

    Poorly planned outings lead to unplanned death

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  81. Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers

    Myers wins the truck bed Royal Rumble

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  82. Raw (2016)

    Sisters are doing it* for themselves!



    *cannibalism

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  83. The Hitcher II: I've Been Waiting (2003, dir. Louis Morneau)
    No reason to exist, but not bad!

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  84. The Mummy (2017)

    Classic horror tale gets a bad wrap.

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  85. Little Evil (2017)

    It’s OK I guess... aaaaaaaaaaand I’m crying.

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  86. Evil Dead (2013)

    Found the only porn I don’t like

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  87. Ganja & Hess (1973)

    Despite the title, blood is the addiction.

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  88. Asylum (1972)

    Starring Cushing, Lom!
    (Combined screentime 5 minutes.)

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  89. It Follows (2014)

    Stay back! I have a restraining order!

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  90. WNUF Halloween Special (2013)

    Who knew commercials could make me nostalgic?

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  91. Curse of Chucky (2013)

    Chucky resembles the Fred's version of himself.

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