THE CORPSE VANISHES (1942)Bela Lugosi prefers to sleep in coffinsORElixirs of youth have a human cost
A Bay of Blood (1971)Well this is ending predictably...... WAIT WHAT?!
In the Tall Grass (2019)Sequel: In the Tall Grass 2: HypergrassOrStephen King’s pokemon adaptation is pretty wierd
A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge (1985)So… Yeah. It is a bit homoerotic.orGreat adaptation of “The Man Inside Me”
Night of the Demon (1957)Val Lewton would've been proud of this.
Das Cabinet Des Dr. Caligari (1920)Cesare is the original emo goth bitch.orDr. Caligari remake starring Danny Devito confirmed.
TERROR AT TENKILLER (1986) Yeah, let’s vacation at someplace called “Tenkiller.”
Friday the 13th pt VI: Jason LivesSame Camp Blood – Now with Alice Cooper
Slumber Party Massacre II (1987)Hey, why you dressed like a chicken?
Sleepwalkers (1992, dir. Mick Garris)There's a horror directors' convention in town?
3 From Hell (2019, Rob Zombie)Zombie's dancing cat also acclaimed Mr. Mistoffelees
Night of the Demons 2 (1994)Lucious Lipstick and hand titties...seems legit(Mickey from Michigan)
What we do in the shadowsSee this or enter "Circle of Shame"
Never hike aloneFriday 13th fan film. YouTube 53 mins Kinda annoying, But also scariest ever Jason!
Don't Torture a Duckling (1972)Awful sequel to To Kill a Mockingbird
The Two Faces of Dr. Jekyll (1960)The Strange Case of Christopher Lee's Sideburns
The Devil's Rain, dir. Robert Fuest (1975)Shatner's screaming, people melting, Borgnine surprisingly welcoming.
Lair of the White Worm (1988)Snake lady makes my white worm tingle
Unrest (2006, dir. Jason Todd Ipson)Good double with Autopsy of Jane Doe.
Scary Movie (2000) dir. Keenen Ivory WayansWhat is the opposite of staying power?
What We Do In The Shadows (2015) dir. Jemaine Clement & Taika WaititiI'm Stu trying to explain his job.
Friday the 13th (1980)Sail Away Tiny Sparrow...added to playlist!
Sleepwalkers (1992, dir. Mick Garris) (with FTM's commentary)Every Scary Movie Month's highlight: the commentary!
Suspiria (2018) Psych101: Swinton takes on Freud. Jung rules.
Dark Night of the Scarecrow (1981)Charles Durning dies 93-minutes too late.
White Zombie (1932)Heroes and zombies slip through Bela's grasp.
Wicked Little Things (2006, dir. J.S. Cardone)Killer kid movies just aren't my jam.
Dead of Night (1945)Worth it for that splendid final act.
Funny games (2007)It's kind of like Funny Games 1997
VELVET BUZZSAW (2019 on Amazon) Apparently art is worth more if haunted. OR Jake's backside is the real star here!
Resident Evil: Retribution (2012)Imagine It's A Small World but zombies.
Halloween 2018Michael Myers Multiverse Mayhem lacks Paul Rudd
Mandy 2018My Home depot smelting project reaps benefits
Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers (1989) dir. Dominique Othenin-GirardBeing a Haddonfield cop is extra dangerous
Near Dark (1987)Punk bloodsuckers feed on hayseeds, drunk truckers
Oh, and thanks for the great recommendation JB!
Black Sabbath (1963)Here’s my number so call me maybe.
Christine (1983)A young man’s journey down the shitter.
Habit (1995)Finally a Sex in the City prequel.
Candyman: Farewell to the Flesh (1995)Hey, this isn't a Willy Wonka sequel!
Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama (1988)Childhood fascination with VHS cover art justified
I Saw the Devil (2010) :and I saw a pretty good movie
Friday the 13th (2009)Better than the original, yet nobody noticed.
With nary a nod to "Sail Away Tiny Sparrow"?
Not of this Earth (1988)Know what Corman's version was missing? Boobs.
Halloween 2 (1981, dir. Rick Rosenthal)Ben, look both ways before you cross.
Halloween H20 (1998, dir. Steve Miner)Anyone up for an LL Busta team-up?
Halloween 3 The film that makes moustaches sexy again
Gwen (2019, dir. William McGregor)This is what The Witch hath wrought.
Chopping Mall (1986, dir. Jim Wynorski)Want to shop at House of Almonds.
House (1986)Reboot Night Court with Big Ben, cowards
House by the Cemetery (1981)Despite best efforts, Harold's hatchet missed Bob
Happy Death Day 2 U (2019)Murder Baby - 6 More Weeks of Winter
CLIMAX (2018) Maybe the Puritans were right about dancing.
Just laughed out loud at work reading this! :)
Scream 2 (1997)Don't Ask Don't Tell Don't Die..oops
Army of Darkness (1992)Necronomicon of a Wimpy Hero: Medieval Days
A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors (1987) Dreaming superpower only useful in specific circumstances
The Wolf Man (1941)“Larry, you’re a werewolf. Also, clearly adopted.”
Pulse (回路 Kairo) (2001)Keen prediction! We're *all* computer ghosts now.
Shadow of a Doubt (1943) (C)ouldn't (H)ave (A)voided (R)egifting? (L)ittle (I)nconsiderate (E)h?
👏👏👏👏
Creepshow (1982)Pass those scons, you're such a hogg
Atlanta Braves Game 5 (2019)Egads, call the game. They're already dead.
Pet Sematary (2016)Some parts are better. Some are worse.
Kiss of the Damned (2011)Oh! It's basically vampire erotica...and boring.
Pet Sematary (2016)At least they got the spelling wrong.
The Perfection (2019) Dir. Richard ShepardThis Whiplash prequel goes some bizarre places.
The Sentinel (1977, dir. Michael Winner)Beverly D'Angelo is the very best hostess.
Tales of Terror (1962, dir. Roger Corman)Wine tasting face still my spirit animal.
Brain Damage (1988)Wait... This is really about addiction, right?
Phantom of the Mall: Eric's Revenge (1989)Better than Phantom of Wal-Mart: Sam's Scorn
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Brain (1988)This movie is all brain no balls.
Man's Best Friend (1993)"Somebody find Lance a coat that fits!"
Street Trash (1987)Proves a penis makes a poor football.
Motel Hell (1980)Kept waiting for Gordon Ramsay. Never showed.
Lake Placid (1999)Pullman in khaki may rival Dern Butt.
I love this.
TerrifiedMaybe naked closet ghost just wants clothes?
Black Sunday (1960)Once marked choices are Witch or Kryptonian.
LIVE FREAKY DIE FREAKY (2006) Making them claymation doesn’t make it funny.
3 From Hell (2019)I guess the zoom control was stuck.
Invisble Ghost (1941)Title promises literally nothing, still doesn't deliver
Suburban Gothic (2014)This was great. Has an amazing soundtrack.
Black Sunday (1960)Wampire? Vitch? What exactly is Princess Asa?
Lesley Ann Warren is ridiculously, preternaturally hot. Clue (1985)
The Reef (2010)Couldn't sink my teeth into this one.
Blood Feast (dir Herschell Gordon Lewis, 1963)What a bore... At least there's gore?
Midsommar (2019; dir: Ari Aster)I look like a bear. It's hereditary.
The Cell (2000)The many magnificent outfits of Vinny D.
"The Eyes Of My Mother" (2016, Dir. Nicholas Pesce)Fuck it, I'll die for Portuguese food.
WAR OF THE WORLDS (Spielberg)Tom Cruise is a dick for once.
EVENT HORIZON (1997)It's Pennywise and Christine in outer space!
Pulse (2001) Simpler times when internet was merely ghastly
THE CORPSE VANISHES (1942)
ReplyDeleteBela Lugosi prefers to sleep in coffins
OR
Elixirs of youth have a human cost
A Bay of Blood (1971)
ReplyDeleteWell this is ending predictably...... WAIT WHAT?!
In the Tall Grass (2019)
ReplyDeleteSequel: In the Tall Grass 2: Hypergrass
Or
Stephen King’s pokemon adaptation is pretty wierd
A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge (1985)
ReplyDeleteSo… Yeah. It is a bit homoerotic.
or
Great adaptation of “The Man Inside Me”
Night of the Demon (1957)
ReplyDeleteVal Lewton would've been proud of this.
Das Cabinet Des Dr. Caligari (1920)
ReplyDeleteCesare is the original emo goth bitch.
or
Dr. Caligari remake starring Danny Devito confirmed.
TERROR AT TENKILLER (1986)
ReplyDeleteYeah, let’s vacation at someplace called “Tenkiller.”
Friday the 13th pt VI: Jason Lives
ReplyDeleteSame Camp Blood – Now with Alice Cooper
Slumber Party Massacre II (1987)
ReplyDeleteHey, why you dressed like a chicken?
Sleepwalkers (1992, dir. Mick Garris)
ReplyDeleteThere's a horror directors' convention in town?
3 From Hell (2019, Rob Zombie)
ReplyDeleteZombie's dancing cat also acclaimed
Mr. Mistoffelees
Night of the Demons 2 (1994)
ReplyDeleteLucious Lipstick and hand titties...seems legit
(Mickey from Michigan)
What we do in the shadows
ReplyDeleteSee this or enter "Circle of Shame"
Never hike alone
ReplyDeleteFriday 13th fan film. YouTube 53 mins
Kinda annoying, But also scariest ever Jason!
Don't Torture a Duckling (1972)
ReplyDeleteAwful sequel to To Kill a Mockingbird
The Two Faces of Dr. Jekyll (1960)
ReplyDeleteThe Strange Case of Christopher Lee's Sideburns
The Devil's Rain, dir. Robert Fuest (1975)
ReplyDeleteShatner's screaming, people melting, Borgnine surprisingly welcoming.
Lair of the White Worm (1988)
ReplyDeleteSnake lady makes my white worm tingle
Unrest (2006, dir. Jason Todd Ipson)
ReplyDeleteGood double with Autopsy of Jane Doe.
Scary Movie (2000) dir. Keenen Ivory Wayans
ReplyDeleteWhat is the opposite of staying power?
What We Do In The Shadows (2015) dir. Jemaine Clement & Taika Waititi
ReplyDeleteI'm Stu trying to explain his job.
Friday the 13th (1980)
ReplyDeleteSail Away Tiny Sparrow...added to playlist!
Sleepwalkers (1992, dir. Mick Garris) (with FTM's commentary)
ReplyDeleteEvery Scary Movie Month's highlight: the commentary!
Suspiria (2018)
ReplyDeletePsych101: Swinton takes on Freud. Jung rules.
Dark Night of the Scarecrow (1981)
ReplyDeleteCharles Durning dies 93-minutes too late.
White Zombie (1932)
ReplyDeleteHeroes and zombies slip through Bela's grasp.
Wicked Little Things (2006, dir. J.S. Cardone)
ReplyDeleteKiller kid movies just aren't my jam.
Dead of Night (1945)
ReplyDeleteWorth it for that splendid final act.
Funny games (2007)
ReplyDeleteIt's kind of like Funny Games 1997
VELVET BUZZSAW (2019 on Amazon)
ReplyDeleteApparently art is worth more if haunted.
OR
Jake's backside is the real star here!
Resident Evil: Retribution (2012)
ReplyDeleteImagine It's A Small World but zombies.
Halloween 2018
ReplyDeleteMichael Myers Multiverse Mayhem lacks Paul Rudd
Mandy 2018
ReplyDeleteMy Home depot smelting project reaps benefits
Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers (1989) dir. Dominique Othenin-Girard
ReplyDeleteBeing a Haddonfield cop is extra dangerous
Near Dark (1987)
ReplyDeletePunk bloodsuckers feed on hayseeds, drunk truckers
Oh, and thanks for the great recommendation JB!
DeleteBlack Sabbath (1963)
ReplyDeleteHere’s my number so call me maybe.
Christine (1983)
ReplyDeleteA young man’s journey down the shitter.
Habit (1995)
ReplyDeleteFinally a Sex in the City prequel.
Candyman: Farewell to the Flesh (1995)
ReplyDeleteHey, this isn't a Willy Wonka sequel!
Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama (1988)
ReplyDeleteChildhood fascination with VHS cover art justified
I Saw the Devil (2010) :
ReplyDeleteand I saw a pretty good movie
Friday the 13th (2009)
ReplyDeleteBetter than the original, yet nobody noticed.
With nary a nod to "Sail Away Tiny Sparrow"?
DeleteNot of this Earth (1988)
ReplyDeleteKnow what Corman's version was missing? Boobs.
Halloween 2 (1981, dir. Rick Rosenthal)
ReplyDeleteBen, look both ways before you cross.
Halloween H20 (1998, dir. Steve Miner)
ReplyDeleteAnyone up for an LL Busta team-up?
Halloween 3
ReplyDeleteThe film that makes moustaches sexy again
Gwen (2019, dir. William McGregor)
ReplyDeleteThis is what The Witch hath wrought.
Chopping Mall (1986, dir. Jim Wynorski)
ReplyDeleteWant to shop at House of Almonds.
House (1986)
ReplyDeleteReboot Night Court with Big Ben, cowards
House by the Cemetery (1981)
ReplyDeleteDespite best efforts, Harold's hatchet missed Bob
Happy Death Day 2 U (2019)
ReplyDeleteMurder Baby - 6 More Weeks of Winter
CLIMAX (2018)
ReplyDeleteMaybe the Puritans were right about dancing.
Just laughed out loud at work reading this! :)
DeleteScream 2 (1997)
ReplyDeleteDon't Ask Don't Tell Don't Die..oops
Army of Darkness (1992)
ReplyDeleteNecronomicon of a Wimpy Hero: Medieval Days
A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors (1987)
ReplyDeleteDreaming superpower only useful in specific circumstances
The Wolf Man (1941)
ReplyDelete“Larry, you’re a werewolf. Also, clearly adopted.”
Pulse (回路 Kairo) (2001)
ReplyDeleteKeen prediction! We're *all* computer ghosts now.
Shadow of a Doubt (1943)
ReplyDelete(C)ouldn't (H)ave (A)voided (R)egifting? (L)ittle (I)nconsiderate (E)h?
👏👏👏👏
DeleteCreepshow (1982)
ReplyDeletePass those scons, you're such a hogg
Atlanta Braves Game 5 (2019)
ReplyDeleteEgads, call the game. They're
already dead.
Pet Sematary (2016)
ReplyDeleteSome parts are better. Some are worse.
Kiss of the Damned (2011)
ReplyDeleteOh! It's basically vampire erotica...and boring.
Pet Sematary (2016)
ReplyDeleteAt least they got the spelling wrong.
The Perfection (2019) Dir. Richard Shepard
ReplyDeleteThis Whiplash prequel goes some bizarre places.
The Sentinel (1977, dir. Michael Winner)
ReplyDeleteBeverly D'Angelo is the very best hostess.
Tales of Terror (1962, dir. Roger Corman)
ReplyDeleteWine tasting face still my spirit animal.
Brain Damage (1988)
ReplyDeleteWait... This is really about addiction, right?
Phantom of the Mall: Eric's Revenge (1989)
ReplyDeleteBetter than Phantom of Wal-Mart: Sam's Scorn
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteThe Brain (1988)
ReplyDeleteThis movie is all brain no balls.
Man's Best Friend (1993)
ReplyDelete"Somebody find Lance a coat that fits!"
Street Trash (1987)
ReplyDeleteProves a penis makes a poor football.
Motel Hell (1980)
ReplyDeleteKept waiting for Gordon Ramsay. Never showed.
Lake Placid (1999)
ReplyDeletePullman in khaki may rival Dern Butt.
I love this.
DeleteTerrified
ReplyDeleteMaybe naked closet ghost just wants clothes?
Black Sunday (1960)
ReplyDeleteOnce marked choices are Witch or Kryptonian.
LIVE FREAKY DIE FREAKY (2006)
ReplyDeleteMaking them claymation doesn’t make it funny.
3 From Hell (2019)
ReplyDeleteI guess the zoom control was stuck.
Invisble Ghost (1941)
ReplyDeleteTitle promises literally nothing, still doesn't deliver
Suburban Gothic (2014)
ReplyDeleteThis was great. Has an amazing soundtrack.
Black Sunday (1960)
ReplyDeleteWampire? Vitch? What exactly is Princess Asa?
Lesley Ann Warren is ridiculously, preternaturally hot. Clue (1985)
ReplyDeleteThe Reef (2010)
ReplyDeleteCouldn't sink my teeth into this one.
Blood Feast (dir Herschell Gordon Lewis, 1963)
ReplyDeleteWhat a bore... At least there's gore?
Midsommar (2019; dir: Ari Aster)
ReplyDeleteI look like a bear. It's hereditary.
The Cell (2000)
ReplyDeleteThe many magnificent outfits of Vinny D.
"The Eyes Of My Mother" (2016, Dir. Nicholas Pesce)
ReplyDeleteFuck it, I'll die for Portuguese food.
WAR OF THE WORLDS (Spielberg)
ReplyDeleteTom Cruise is a dick for once.
EVENT HORIZON (1997)
ReplyDeleteIt's Pennywise and Christine in outer space!
Pulse (2001)
ReplyDeleteSimpler times when internet was merely ghastly