Thursday, August 1, 2013
Riske Business: Songs From Movies That I Love but Probably Shouldn't (Vol. 1)
On the heels of writing a piece with Mark Ahn about music in movies, I stumbled upon a gem of a song that I openly made fun of for years but secretly love when no one was looking (it kicks off my list). Then I realized I have a ton of songs from movies that I feel this way about. Am I crazy for liking these?
Song: “Come With Me”
Artist: Puff Daddy Featuring Jimmy Page
From: Godzilla (1998)
This song is great because someone heard “Kashmir” by Led Zepplin and thought “Pretty good, but could use rapping.” In all seriousness, this is by far the most enjoyable thing to come out of Roland Emmerich’s calamity of a Godzilla entry because Puff Daddy does what he does best – make anything, in this case NYC under the attack of a giant lizard, about himself. Moments I love include the lyrics “I wanna fight you, I’ll flippin’ bite you, can’t stand nobody like you” and the closing moment where Puffy and G.Zilla stare each other down before Puffy shows him who’s HBIC (Head Bitch In Charge) and TURNS HIS BACK ON GODZILLA. Uh, huh. Yeh!
Artist: Chad Kroeger Featuring Josey Scott
From: Spider-Man (2002)
All irony aside, I think this is a legitimately kick-ass song. I could have done without the up-the-building crotch shot of Mr. Avril Lavigne, but the rest of the video and the song are so earnest! Chad and Josey are not phoning this in at all. They really want to know where this hero is that will save us. They’re guessing he’s above them because these guys are always looking up.
Song: “Deepest Bluest (Shark’s Fin)”
Artist: LL Cool J
From: Deep Blue Sea (1999)
Where do I begin? This song and video are perfect. I’m thinking one day LL had a swimming cap on and a friend said “That hat looks like a shark’s fin” and LL said “Call the orchestra and the girls and have them at the pool in 20 minutes.” This song is chock full of golden nuggets, like when LL says he will not only be “eating your whole fam” but also “ate your ancestors.” More impressive? He tells you that he’ll be “getting a lapdance when I smash through your boat.” How is that even possible? The video closes impressively as LL’s Deep Blue Sea cast mates observe him swimming at them as if he were a shark and then TURNS INTO A SHARK.
Song: “On Our Own”
Artist: Bobby Brown
From: Ghostbusters II (1989)
Apparently they marketed the shit out of Ghostbusters II in New York City, mostly on moving billboards. Bobby Brown not only has crazy eyes through the whole video, but he might have the craziest eyes. That aside, this song is killer. It hits my sweet spot of late '80s-early '90s hip hop. Go back and check out the Ghostbusters II soundtrack. It’s so good. Also, 10 points to Bobby Brown for working proton packs into a rap and still retaining his street cred.
Song: “Turtle Power”
Artist: Partners in Kryme
From: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990)
Come for the great music, stay for the shenanigans. I love how literal this song is; apparently any lyric that was not completely on the nose was removed. I do have a few questions, though. Why is the group called Partners in Kryme when there is only one guy? Why are Leonardo and Michelangelo staring at the rapper for such a long time? Are they racist? If you’re a mutated man-sized turtle can you afford to be intolerant? But most importantly, why in a song for a kids movie do two chicks flash their asses at the 2:16 mark to reveal they have ‘Turtle Power’ written on their underpants? Are they property of the heroes with a half shell? I thought they waited until Secret of the Ooze to run a train.
Song: “It’s Probably Me”
Artist: Sting, Eric Clapton and Michael Kamen
From: Lethal Weapon 3 (1992)
So I have a theory. Sting, Eric Clapton and Michael Kamen were tasked with writing the single for Lethal Weapon 3 and couldn’t come up with anything. They took a break and went out for lunch, probably Thai food. Even after lunch, they couldn’t think of anything for the song. Then Sting farted but wouldn’t admit it. After 15 minutes of Sting denying it was him with the ‘he who smelt it dealt it’ defense, he conceded “it’s probably me” and Clapton rushed to the guitar and Kamen ran to the keys.
Song: “Have You Ever Really Loved A Woman”
Artist: Bryan Adams
From: Don Juan DeMarco
I will know if a woman will be my future wife when I ask myself the question "Is she worthy of 'Have You Ever Really Loved a Woman’?" This song is the most romantic thing that has ever happened. It makes me want to learn Spanish guitar just so I can play it. Only four women have been worthy of this song: my 7th grade crush Jenny Dziabajinski, Anck Su Namun from The Mummy, Aunt Becky on Full House and Laura Dern. The video also reveals Bryan Adams’ failed bid to Johnny Depp to play The Lone Ranger. It was directed by Anton Corbijn, who has made some great movies including the Joy Division biopic Control and the George Clooney thriller The American. You should watch both.
Song: “King of Wishful Thinking”
Artist: Go West
From: Pretty Woman (1990)
If you do not get over your past love after watching this video there is no hope for you. Go West tries everything – hockey, elephants, boats, and a cameo by the literal King of Wishful Thinking. This song is super catchy, which is good for Go West because as evidenced by this video they probably never would have gotten laid if they weren’t musicians. BTW…I love the shot of the film strip for Pretty Woman. Keep 35mm alive boys!
What are some songs from movies that you love but have been too embarrassed to admit to anyone?