Friday, September 27, 2013

Watchin' Trailerz with Doug (Sept. 27)

T-minus three days till #ScaryMovieMonth! Until then, some ultimately unsatisfying non-horror previews!

Need for Speed
Release date: March 14, 2014

Pretty good trailer for a pretty derivative movie (based on a video game) about cars and racing and vengeance and masculinity. And boy, talk about timing! Aaron Paul is on top of the world right now, which I have to assume is why this teaser was released so soon. Gotta capitalize on that Breaking Bad mojo! I usually don't read the YouTube comments (and/or steal wholesale), but the top two posts made me LOL: "Yo, I Need Speed, Bitch." And, "Braking Bad." My work here is done.

Grace of Monaco
Release date: TBA

Blah, blah blah, Nicole Kidman is pretty (one of the prettiest actresses working right meow), just like Grace Kelly. I mean, if that's what this preview is trying to convey, well then ... mission accomplished. Otherwise, snooze.

Release date: Nov. 27, 2013

It's late and I'm lazy and #ScaryMovieMonth is next week, so I'll just say this: WINTER IS COMING. Zing!

Dealin' with Idiots
Release date: July 12, 2013(?)

Stupid title, great cast and [director!] Jeff Garlin doing his best Larry David impersonation. It's not, like, "Ha ha" funny. More like, "Hmmm, yeah" funny. And that's fine with me. Love that Natasha Leggero's bikini'd body is the YouTube pic for this preview. SHE'S BARELY IN THE TRAILER. It's called marketing, people.

Dom Hemingway
Release date: April 4, 2014

Weeee! I really like Jude Law's career trajectory. A dozen years ago, he was a dreamy (for real) leading man in romantic comedies. I maybe(?) had a man-crush on him in The Talented Mr. Ripley, but sowhatwhocares? I'm comfortable with who I am -- JUST LIKE MR. LAW! Don't you see? Now he's playing con-artists and oddballs and overweight losers (let's forget about the stupid Sherlock Holmes movies for a second). He's EMBRACING his age and taking on more unique, fun parts. And we should thank him! Because, while this trailer has moments I LOVE and moments I LOATHE, at least it's not just another shitty Hugh Grant film.

The Motel Life
Release date: Nov. 8, 2013

Interesting mix of gritty realism, cartoonish fantasy and nasal Emile Hirsch voiceover. Not entirely sure I know what this movie's about, but I'm fine with that (in this day and age of trailers giving away too much). Question: does Stephen Dorff only make indie movies these days? Better question: does Stephen Dorff only make movies with Fanning sisters these days?

About Last Night
Release date: Feb. 14, 2014

Happy Valentine's Day! So, wait ... Kevin Hart is the Jim Belushi character? ListenlistenlistenLISTEN: Kevin Hart is legit funny. Even my favorite comedy website sez so. But why remake this film? And yeah, I realize both are based on a David Mamet play. I M SMRT. The 1986 version features a PERFECTLY CUTE 24-year-old Demi Moore pre-boob job getting it on with a very feathered-haired Rob Lowe in a bathtub (among other places). Am I saying that I own the former movie on DVD? Yes. Am I saying that I've seen certain scenes from said movie numerous times? Perhaps. Am I saying ... wait, what am I saying?


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