Saturday, September 21, 2013

Weekend Weigh-in: Is There a Movie You Wish You Had Never Seen?

Some things you can never un-see.

While I don't know that I regret anything I've seen (except maybe you, second viewing of Entrapment in the same day), there are certain images that I wish weren't burned into my brain (not you, Catherine Zeta Jones crawling under the lasers in Entrapment).

How about you guys? Are there movies you wish you had never seen? Either because they were upsetting, disturbing or just because you felt like it was a waste of time?

14 comments:

  1. I'm in the same boat as you, Patrick. It's hard for me to say that I regreted watching a movie, but there are plenty movies I don't want to see again.

    The only thing I can think of is "Checkered Flag or Crash", a movie I saw for Susan Sarandon day of #30DaysofStars on Netflix Instant. First, the movie as is on Netflix is in EXTREMELY bad quality in both picture and sound(the ADR is horrible. Then we get to the movie, which is boring and has no sense of direction. It fails as a car movie, comedy, and action movie. There are far superior enjoyably bad Joe Don Baker films. Susan Sarandon is wasted and Larry Hagman looks bored.

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    1. I'll add "The Devil Inside" because fuck that movie!

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  2. Goonies, maybe? That was a complete waste of time. It's not even entertainingly bad like a Howard the Duck or something liek that.

    Hook! There's a complete was of everyone's time and I actually started to get angry during it.

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    1. Goonies? Are you kidding me? Well, to each his own.

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  3. Boys Don't Cry. It was kind of difficult to go to California Pizza Kitchen after that.

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  4. Arachnophobia. I can't stand spiders, but it was marketed as a comedic take on creepy crawly creature features. I was in high school when it came out, and I was a rabid horror junkie, so of course this creature comedy couldn't possibly scare me, right?

    I've checked inside my shoes before putting them on every single day of the 23 years that followed. "Thrill-omedy" my ass, that movie is fucking horrifying. I recognize that it's not a bad movie, but I never want to see it again.

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  5. Antichrist. That's the first movie that comes to mind that I almost wish I could un-see. At any rate, I found it deeply disturbing and gross and sad and depressing. I don't know, maybe it's good, but I am pretty sure I never want to see it again for all the terrible ways it made me feel.

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  6. There is a bunch of those I wanted to unsee, but if I had to choose one of them, I'm going to say "The Cat in the Hat".

    I grew up reading the book, and when I learned that there was a movie coming out, I decided to check it out with my sister and my stepfather. Only until I watched this movie again a couple of years later that I realized was that, why are there dirty jokes in a kids movie? There are so many parts they should have removed like this extreme car that was called "S.H.I.T." and Mike Myers calling a hose a "dirty ho". I was like, what?! Myers was terrible, Alec Baldwin and Kelly Preston were garbage, Dakota Fanning and Spencer Brestlin were awful, and it was no wonder that Dr. Seuss's widow decided to ban further live-action adaptations of her late husband's work after seeing this film.

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  7. Ironic. Our local independent theater here in Denver is showing The Garbage Pail Kids Movie tonight (I think) at midnight. With extra added attraction the guy who played Juice for a Q&A.

    I still say some Federal agency should be there taking names.

    A movie I wished I'd never seen because it was a waste of time? God, where would I start?

    The first movie I can think of that was just a disgusting piece of crap was The Incredible Two-Headed Transplant with Bruce Dern. I'd watch a double feature of Return to Sleepaway Camp and Silent Night, Deadly Night before I'd watch that again.

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  8. I've only seen parts of it, so maybe I'm missing something, but what I have seen of Dredd 2012 depressed and creeped the hell out of me. The USA's "War on Drugs" has ruined and ended untold actual lives, so let's all go watch a movie glorifying police brutality, in which dozens of carefully-selected multi-ethnic youths are graphically slaughtered, but it's all okay because a pretty young white girl is literally magic? Isn't that the sort of slaughter porn we rightfully jeered Tarantino's Hitler for gleefully eating up in Inglourious Basterds? (That Nation's Pride in-movie movie, mind, also featured a besieged soldier in a tower defending himself from a fight of his own making.) Isn't this the sort of Party-made hyper-violent schlock cinema described in Nineteen-Eighty-Four? What makes this okay? I ask this honestly. Because it's based on a British comic? Because Rob Schneider's not in it? Because the fact that one of the heroes is a pretty young magic white girl means that a movie featuring a villainess named "Ma-Ma" (har, har, get it? As in "Mother"?) isn't hopelessly misogynistic?

    Patrick, I've appreciated and respected your criticism of all the wanton destruction and implied loss of life in this summer's movies. So again, I honestly ask, because I haven't seen the whole thing, and am only going by an impression/gut reaction: is Dredd not the very epitome of this ugly trend?

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  9. I can think of two. Around town there used to be a Halloween horror marathon every year and every time they'd end the show with a particularly nasty piece of work.

    One year they wrapped up with Cannibal Holocaust and I had been curious after hearing so much about how horrific it was. By the time it got to the filmmakers pointlessly torturing and mutilating live animals on camera to shock the audience, I realized I would have been happier remaining curious and unaware.

    The next year they ended with August Underground's Mordum, which I'm not sure should even qualify as a film, managing to be just as vile without any animal torture involved.

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  10. Salo. Saw it as a young teenager - ruined pretty much any "shocking" horror for me forever cause that is about as bad as it gets. Maybe Serbian Film as of late.

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