Monday, August 18, 2014

F This Movie! - The Expendables 3

Patrick reunites with Mark Ahn and Adam Thas in the hopes that the third time's the charm.



Download this episode here. (72.6 MB)

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Also discussed this episode: Locke (2014), Only Lovers Left Alive (2014), A Most Wanted Man (2014), Divergent (2014), The Delta Force (1986), American Ninja (1985), Anatomy of a Murder (1959), The Internship (2013), Dead Hooker in a Trunk (2009)

24 comments:

  1. Damn it. I actually want to see the movie now to see how bad the jacket is?

    Im thinking of Steven Segals jacket in On deadly ground as my favourite bad jacket of all time. Thats gonna take some beating

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    1. Here's the thing with Segal's jacket. Yes it's terrible in "On Deadly Ground", but it's obviously of native-american design. So even though its awful, it at least has some context within the movie. Stallone's jacket serves no purpose except for being the worst.

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    2. Just one man's opinion, but Stallone's jacket is worse.

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    3. Good point Adam. I see what you mean and agree there is a reason for it in that film.
      Maybe Stallones jackets purpose is just for film fans like us to talk about and say Like Hey, did you see that jacket? And the next thing is im going to the pictures to see a film I don't really fancy but now I just want to see the bloody jacket. Its a talking point. Damn. F that jacket

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  2. Actors for next movie. How about Brian Bosworth

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    1. Given that, in light of box office returns, the next one is likely to be a courtroom drama of Barney's trial for all sorts of international crimes and weapons smuggling, how about James Spader? He can really light up a cross-examination!

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  3. I'm so glad that Stallone's technicolour dreamcoat is getting mentioned here. Good podcast guys. I watched the film on opening night here in Sydney with a pretty tame audience. They laughed at the unfunny bits, and seemed to thoroughly enjoy the "chopper" throwback lines. Give me more unintelligible chatter between Arnie and Jet Li any day...has Jet Li's english gotten significantly worse since the first movie?

    I guess that might happen when you're given 11 lines in three movies over four years.

    I agree with Patrick - I'm a 31 year old hard action fan - these movies should just be ridiculously good ensemble action spectacles but instead they fall flat often where they should excel. I also think that this movie really suffered with a pg rating (M rating here) - what audience are they aiming for exactly? It will be the same audience seeing this as the other two so keep the blood and guts in there!

    I think the PG rating really confused the direction taken with the action. The first two films had some really good, albeit short hand to hand combat sequences. But here in EX3 you've got actual trained fighters and brilliant martial artists shooting guns.

    All things considered though, I love that this franchise exists, it will continue to take my money as long as it goes round.

    Maybe for the next movie, as much as it pains me to say, Sly should do less script writing and focus on writing a complaint letter to the wardrobe department asking what the fuck is going on with that jacket.

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  4. 3 attempts and not a single enjoyable film (as a whole). There are parts/scenes in each that I like, but they never come together & work overall.

    Does Stallone not understand why people want to see some of these actors do what they excel at? Prime example is Jet Li. I watch Jet Li films because the hand-to-hand fight scenes he has done in his career are amazing. Yet we get 2 very brief examples of this: vs Lundgren (#1) and kitchen scene (start of #2). Neither of which is compelling. Anything else he is shooting a gun - I don't want to watch Jet Li shooting a gun. Anybody can do that. In any case, I hope he got paid well.

    I liked Stallone's screenplay work on Rambo (2008) as he had a good grasp on that character and how it was portrayed on screen was effective. That is completely absent in any of these 3 films and as much as it saddens me to say, I hope this is the last in this series.

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  5. Here's a wacky idea, why not hire an actual action director for these movies? What's John Woo doing that he wouldn't drop it and work on this one for a couple $$$'s? Woo's weakness is telling a coherent plot, but these movies don't have coherent plots to hurt. He'd just coordinate stuff blowing up, terrific gun fights, boat chases, fist fights, violence.

    Here's another wacky idea, the movie is called "Expendables", why not kill off a couple guys to thin the herd and give Barney a motivation for killing thousands of non-Americans in foreign countries.

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    1. Maybe the really good action directors want too much control? These really seem to be run by Avi Lerner and Millennium Films. But they've worked with enough talented guys that they could surely find SOMEONE to do a better job, right?

      These movies just keep making variations on the same mistakes.

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  6. I really enjoyed the podcast this week and feel you guys were fair to this movie. It’s not very good. But I LOVED it. Call me a sheep, or a cheap date, but this has everything I love about a DUMB action movie.

    Do I wish these movies were better? Yes. If Gareth Evans or John Hyams helmed Expendables 4 I would be overjoyed. But I really enjoy this series the way I enjoy Commando, Under Siege 2: Dark Territory, Tango and Cash, etc, which by all critical accounts are terrible movies. But they get by on the charisma of the stars, crazy dialogue, outrageous gags. How is “Rest in Pieces” any worse than “Let off some steam, Bennett”? I think we could all agree that is one of the greatest DUMB action movie moments ever.

    Also if you told me Harrison Ford “performed” the helicopter scene at gunpoint I would believe you. Outrageously Awful.

    My idea for Expendables 4 (although the series may be on life-support at this moment): A trio of British hit men are hired to hunt down the expendables played by Timothy Dalton, Pierce Brosnan, and Daniel Craig. Asses, meet seats.

    Love the podcast!

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    1. That's so weird Matt. My idea was this. A British movie where they round up ex-Bonds and make a totally bad arse spy movie where they all have to work together. I would prefer this than them being in an Expendables 4. Plus maybe if it is done by a British crew and over in this country it can break free from what seems to be wrong with the Expendables movies!

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    2. It's not so much the line "Rest in pieces" as much as it is the delivery. He just shouts it unintelligibly. It doesn't have the sense of timing or knowing comedy as "Let of some steam, Bennett." But, then, that's the Expendables movies for. All of the pieces are there but they don't know how to make them work.

      I'm glad you liked it! And I'm glad you thought we were fair. I keep trying to like them. I swear.

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    3. Gabby - Bondsmen - let's get on it! :)

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    4. I laughed out loud when Harrison Ford's character said he was "in the house"

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    5. I like the Bond idea! I was watching the Tonight Show the other night and Jimmy Fallon was talking with Pierce Brosnan about how he wanted to get all of the Bonds together in the same room sometime. I think that would be awesome, but I think a movie featuring all of them would be even more potentially interesting.

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  7. Thank you for the shout out! That brought a smile to my face and I really laughed with the right side/wrong side thing. Actually this episodes was hilarious, really cheered up my trip into town.

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  8. Listening to this inspired me to listen to your original Expendables podcast, which involved lots of excited gushing about the upcoming Tron: Legacy movie. It made me feel like a time traveler from the future who comes bearing bad news.

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  9. Ive been doing a lot of that too. Its really quite nice hearing the excitement in the F Heads podcasts about upcoming movies that are now out. Its the closest we get to time travelling. Recently I was listening to everyone getting excited about Batman Begins....

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    1. Here's a fun time. Listen to the best/worst superhero movie podcast and listen how excited I am for Green Lantern.

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    2. Exactly what I mean. Funny.

      I remember hearing comments years ago about Micheal keaton as Batman. And the complaint was he has no chin! Batman needs a good strong chin

      On the positve side for Green lantern. At least he has a better super hero chin than Micheal keaton. That's about my only positive comment though sorry

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  10. Hi Guys!! As always very entertaining podcast. I have to disagree about Expendables 3. I enjoyed it more than 2, and as much as the original. I come to these movies with the knowledge that they will be big dumb and entertaining. That is what this movie is!!! I agree that the CGI is kind of cheesy but I think that that is part of the attraction. I love this type of 80s big dumb unsophisticated action movie.

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