Tuesday, June 2, 2015

Junesploitation Day 2: Sci-fi!

Step through "The Time Portal" beyond the crack in Space and Time where the fantastic world of the Future will freeze your blood with its weird horrors!

155 comments:

  1. Wild Wild West (1999)

    You got your Will Smith. You got your Kevin Kline. You got the director of Thor. Is it sci-fi? Is it a western? Who cares. Fuck you, Barry Sonnenfeld. 1999 was a great year for movies except for this turd covered in vomit. I'm being too hard on this...I said hard on...two thumbs up...out of 74.

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  2. Barbarella (1968)

    Hamstrung by its PG rating, and languidly paced, Barbarella follows a typical sci fi plot. The supporting cast is very uneven, David Hemmings is hilarious, John Phillip Law is about as wooden as an angel can get. The movie is really saved by some beautiful visuals, sometimes special effects, sometimes Jane Fonda.

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  3. LEPRECHAUN 4: IN SPACE (1996, Amazon Prime)

    You know, the one where Lep literally bursts out of a guy's pecker (where he hid through a urine stream after being blown to pieces by a "space" grenade... I'M NOT MAKING THIS UP!!!) inside a spaceship that took off from a planet made entirely out of giant Chinese fortune cookies. My God, this is a really bad movie that at first lulls you into a false sense of security with standard-issue low-budget trappings: bad acting (even Warwick Davis seems bored and at 1/4 speed), cheap special effects (except for the puppet and make-up for Dr. Mittenhand), slutty females (though Gary Grossman's scientist guy evens the scale with his foot fetish perversion) and over-the-top manly men (Tim Colceri's 'Metal Head' sarge) doing bad "Aliens" cartoony macho schtick.

    It's not until deep into the movie, when the deaths aren't entertaining or even bloody (flattened faces, etc.) and the collective weight of the movie's truckload of imperfections (both the intentional campy ones and the unintentional 'we don't know what we're doing' ones) pile on, that "Leprechaun 4" reveals it's true worthlessness as a so-called cheesy comedy/horror flick. Guess I shouldn't have gone from the first "Leprechaun" to this one without seeing the ones in-between. One of the worst movies I've ever seen, makes "Troll 2" look like "Ghostbusters" by comparison.

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  4. Parallels (2015)

    The only thing more irritatingly presumptuous than a big budget movie assuming it's getting a sequel and thus not giving you a complete story is a small budget movie doing it. Parallels is a really annoying watch. If you've seen Prometheus, you'll understand this frustration. Parallels sets up an interesting premise, presents questions and mysteries it knows the viewer will want the answer to, and ends like an episode of the '60's Batman series: "Tune in next time to get those answers." Prometheus could at least get by on the good will of being a part of the great Alien series overall. This movie hasn't earned the right to play this game.

    Besides that, Parallels suffers from a very weak script. How do we know early on that the two main characters have a troubled family? Because one of them explains it in clunky dialogue: "Even when Dad's here, he's not really here…ever since Mom died." In other places characters attempt to have deep conversations at the strangest of times. There's one major characters whose presence or identity is never really explained. She just appears and is part of the group. Late in the movie the antagonist shows technological skills far beyond what makes any sense. My favorite hallmark of a bad script is when characters continuously call each other by proper names, and this movie is full of that. The movie a mess, and not even a fun one.

    I hate being so negative, but I was really disappointed by Parallels. If you're tempted to watch it, I'd say don't. I knew I should have watched The Thirteenth Floor instead :(

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  5. TOTAL RECALL (1990)
    It is technically the 2nd of June and I am still awake, so...getting my sci-fi exploitation excellence on!

    Side note: I actually like the remake better.

    Sideways side note: The above statement is a lie, as I just wanted to see how many heart attacks I could give because I am a mischevious prick.

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  6. 009 01: The End of the Beginning (2013)

    This one’s nutty even by Japanese standards, with enough plot, twists, and double-crosses for 5 movies crammed into its 85-minute running time. Featuring cyborgs, spies, martial arts, gunplay, sex, zombies, a steel bra (maybe it’s titanium), and a villain seeking to create the world’s weirdest family reunion. Watch it.

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  7. Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines

    This has some decent ideas up front, but loses heart and interest as each second goes by, resulting in a truly nonchalant third act that has some guts but you just don't care at that point. Is it the worst in the franchise? I still can't decide.

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  8. Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan (1982) (First Viewing)

    So for sci fi day here with Junesploitation I decided to go with a flick much talked about and parodied in damn near every TV show I watch, Wrath of Khan. I’m definitely more of a Star Wars guy but I can appreciate a good movie when I see it and that’s what this one is, a very good movie. Good performances, good fx, a nice story with the Genesis program. While my Star Trek knowledge is very limited (only other movies I’ve seen are JJ’s) I will agree with the consensus that this is the best of the Trek. Also Shatner does give a career best performance here, yes even better then in Fanboys.

    8 word Review (in preparation for SMM)

    “Junesploitation needs outweight the needs of going outside”

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  9. Serenity 2005

    Through a random Netflix spin I got Joss Whedon's end note to the show Firefly. It was a first time watch, have never seen the show. I liked it. Whedon has always had a gift for likeable (wow that word does not look right!) characters, and I liked the characters. A whole bunch of like.

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    1. If you liked the movie, you'll love Firefly. I urge you to give it a go, it's wonderful stuff and it's (sadly) only 14 episodes, so you'll breeze through it in no time.

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    2. I just saw they have the series on Netflix, I will definitely check it out!

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  10. Angry Red Planet (1959)
    Mean girls of Mars tell earthlings, "Don't call us we'll call you."
    Also there was a cool wolf/spider/bat creature.

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  11. Starcrash (1978) - First viewing

    There are bad movies and then there are bad movies. This is one of the latter. It's a complete Star Wars knockoff with a little Harryhousen-style stop motion thrown in for good measure, and boy did I have a good time with it!

    "Imperial battleship, halt the flow of time!" might be the greatest deus ex machina ever!

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    1. I genuinely regret that I will never be able to watch Starcrash for the first time again. Seeing Caroline Munroe floating in the vast reaches of space, shouting "I'm over here!" I laughed for 3 days straight.

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    2. Michael GiammarinoJune 2, 2015 at 10:41 AM

      You can count me in on the Starcrash appreciation society as well.

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    3. I've got this one scheduled for Robots! day and now I'm even more excited for it.

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    4. The best part about the "Imperial battleship, halt the flow of time!" line is that it's not only Capt. Von Trapp his own self delivering it, but that by all accounts Plummer and The Hoff were high on coke the whole time they were shooting the movie to get through it. If there is a #2 movie I'd love the FThisMovie gang to get together and do a commentary track on (after the obvious #1 pick, "Exorcist II: The Heretic" ;-) ), it'd definitely be "Starcrash."

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  12. Galaxina 1980

    This spoof flick has about .025% the laughs of Airplane! from the same year. This one takes on Star Wars, Trek, Barbarella to (un)hilarious effect. After groaning through the introduction of Capt. Cornelius Butt and his crew and a painfully slow first half, this movie actually has some fun moments: Space brothel! Space Weed! Dorothy Statten's space suit. She really was something. I'm so mad at Eric Roberts.

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    1. Michael GiammarinoJune 2, 2015 at 10:16 AM

      Padme's white outfit in the latter part of Attack of the Clones has always reminded me of Dorothy Stratten's white spacesuit in Galaxina.

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    2. Nice observation. Dorothy looked better imo;-)

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    3. Michael GiammarinoJune 2, 2015 at 5:38 PM

      Well, I mean, sure, probably; it IS Dorothy Stratten.

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  13. Saturn 3 (1980)

    Harvey Keitel in space, with a ponytail and green leather pants, terrorizing Kirk Douglas and Farrah Fawcett. Your reaction to that image is really the only factor that matters when deciding if this one is worth watching. Truthfully even that isn't enough to save it, it's a pretty terrible movie. It's a rarity amongst Scream Factory releases in that it isn't really even interestingly bad, it's just a dull, boneheaded mess. I still can't really fathom how Stanley Donen could go from Singin' in the Rain to Charade to this garbage nonsense.

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    1. Michael GiammarinoJune 2, 2015 at 9:59 AM

      Don't hold it against him. He was only supposed to be a producer on the film but he had to replace the original director midway into the shoot.

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    2. Can I blame him for producing it, then? Because yuck.

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    3. Michael GiammarinoJune 2, 2015 at 5:32 PM

      Hahahaha, yeah, it's a mess. I'm sure it didn't turn out at all the way John Barry planned. Donen wanted the exploitation element toned down (Fawcett and her wardrobe), Barry and Kirk Douglas didn't get along, and when Donen finally did take over, he hated Harvey Kietel's performance so much, he had Harvey's dialogue dubbed over by another actor. That's what I think makes it an interesting mess, if for no other reason. Well, also, Tarantino's a big fan. He has a print and showed it at one of his festivals at the Drafthouse. I try to collect all of the films he's screened at his festivals. I had to have Saturn 3.

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    4. No joke, that is an awesome thing to collect. Must be a hell of a collection!

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    5. Michael GiammarinoJune 2, 2015 at 9:14 PM

      You'd be surprised how many of them are on dvd or Blu. I was. Of course some of them have god awful transfers, but that just adds to their enjoyment.

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  14. Crossworlds (1996) - first viewing

    I choose this because it's been sitting in my Netflix queue for sometime and I wanted a movie I hadn't seen before for today's selection.

    I went in expecting bad. But instead got a fun (albeit low budget) B-movie starring Rutger Hauer and Josh Charles. There is a cheese factor, but that is part of the charm, I think. If I had seen this as a teenager, I would of loved it.

    Good story, even if it is a tad bit predictable. The action is solid and fun.

    The downside is it feels like it is missing something, but can't quite figure out what.

    Recommended

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  15. Message From Space (1978)

    Two parts Star Wars, One part Power Rangers, One part Dukes of Hazard. Shake well, pour over ice and garnish with a whole Walnut.

    Its your typical story, Magic Walnuts search for a hero to save the Japanese intergalactic hobbits against the chrome plated space knights, they find a rag tag group of misfits and a retired space genral with his garndson in an ill-fitting home made robot costume. you know, the usual.

    Its far from good, but unfortunatly it knows just enough about movies to prevent it from going into the So Bad Its Good territory of Starcrash. It just needed a little more crazy.

    SoundStageAintSpace-sploitation

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    1. Michael GiammarinoJune 2, 2015 at 10:49 AM

      It's fascinating to me how much of Message from Space seems to have found itself in so many of the Star Wars films.

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  16. Alien 2: On Earth (1980, dir. Ciro Ippolito)

    Some mysterious space rocks end up in the hands of a psychic spelunker on her way to a giant cavern with pals. The rocks turn into lumpy little killer aliens. In the truest Italian exploitation fashion, almost nothing at all happens during the movie. At one point the psychic makes a guy's head explode Scanners-style, and the climax takes place in a deserted bowling alley. The final shot of the movie is of the words "You could be next!" superimposed over the L.A. skyline. The score, by somebody named Oliver Onions, is pretty great! Trailer

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    1. You've totally sold me on this movie.

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    2. oliver onions might be the best name in history

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    3. You totally should not watch this movie.

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    4. Please tell us what your username means, I cant work it out

      ESADD ? Cheers :)

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    5. Enigmatic Sobriquet Applicable Dennis' Domanda

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    6. "Oliver Onions" is totally Ennio Morricone's drunken alter ego.

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  17. PRISONERS OF THE LOST UNIVERSE (1984)

    A sexy blonde female scientist and a repairman/kendo champion are teleported to an alternate universe full of wizards and sword-swingin’ barbarians. Our heroes use their modern-day know-how to overthrow an evil warlord and crap. Richard Hatch from Battlestar Galactica and Kay Lenz are fun as they do the Indy/Willie Scott banter, and the fight scenes are hilariously Shatner-style. Unfortunately, there’s too much of the characters just walking around, and the slow pace kills what otherwise might have been great.

    Accompanying short film: AIRLORDS OF AIRIA (2013). This German steampunk short is light on story and the dubbing is terrible, but I liked it. The visuals are impressive considering the low budget, and the final battle has some crazy twists and turns.

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  18. Pitch Black (2000)

    What I've always enjoyed about this movie is how it's all about perception. How the characters perceive the planet, the situation, each other, and how those perceptions can be turned upside down.
    Interesting creature design, stark landscapes, and solid cast round out what I like about Pitch Black.
    Riddick is not the unstoppable superhero he becomes in the series, and that makes him infinitely more interesting.





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    1. Love Pitch Black and the entire Riddick franchise. Vin Diesel is just the best.

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    2. Sometimes I cannot believe that this movie is still so intense like the first time I rented it from a video store to watch it with some friends 15 years ago!! Pitch Black NEVER gets old!!!!!

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  19. Planet of the Vampires (1965)

    You know that this is the future and that we’re in outer space because of the yellow stripes on the black leather Space Jumpsuits. The title Planet of the Vampires is perfect in that it tells you exactly what sort of silliness is in store, but the irony is that the closest the film gets to vampires is the Dracula-esque high collars on the Space Jumpsuits.

    Okay, maybe I’m a little too obsessed with the Space Jumpsuits in this movie. But seriously, if you go into this with the right expectations there’s a lot of fun to be had. The sets and models look like they might fall apart at the slightest provocation, but everything is shot very well and looks quite pretty in defiance of the nonexistent budget. Remarkably and resolutely entertaining.

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    1. I think I heard this movie was a big influence on Alien from a design perspective. I'm not kidding.

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    2. There are actually a few shots that are quite reminiscent of Alien, both of the spaceship and the planet stuff. The tone & feel of the movie couldn't be more different though.

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    3. Michael GiammarinoJune 2, 2015 at 6:33 PM

      In fact, I suspect the spacesuits in Prometheus are a bit of an homage to the spacesuits in Planet of the Vampires. Minus the collars, of course.

      And when Stripe is on the ground disintegrating at the end of Gremlins, his skeleton looks like the skeletons of the derelict they find in Planet of the Vampires.

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    4. Those skeletons were so awesome

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    5. Michael GiammarinoJune 2, 2015 at 8:25 PM

      They were.

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  20. Future Cops (1993, Jing Wong)

    A Wacky™ high school comedy mashed up with elements of Terminator 2 and character designs shamelessly pilfered from Street Fighter. The titular future cops go back in time to save an important judge from being brainwashed by future supervillains. It's basically a hackneyed variation on a Zucker parody, with wall-to-wall gags, almost none of which work. A real disappointment after the weirdo charm of God of Gamblers.

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  21. Terminator II aka Shocking Dark aka Alienators (1989) - First viewing

    The trailer above tells you all you need to know. An Aliens ripoff with a robot thrown in just so they could call it Terminator II. A few fun lines here and there, but mostly I was bored with this. Why oh why didn't I just watch Aliens and/or Terminator 2?

    Favorite line:
    - You either come with us, or I'll blow your head off.
    - Do I have a choice?
    - No!

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  22. Rollerball (Remake) (2002, dir. John McTiernan) (With Commentary by Chris Klein, Rebecca Romijn, and LL Cool J). The commentary for this movie was recorded before it was released and subsequently bombed big-time. It is far more entertaining than the movie itself (which sucks). Between Romijn’s gleeful cursing, Klein’s unbridled… enthusiasm, and Cool J’s joyless “Whoa’s” and “That’s Hot!’s” it was a laugh riot. The movie isn’t worth watching, this ludicrous commentary definitely is!

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    1. I love when a commentary can elevate a movie not otherwise worth watching. I'll keep my eyes peeled around the bargain bin.

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  23. Dark Star (1974)

    My first time seeing this one, too. Carpenter really wanted to spoof Kubrick (even Kubrick's own dark comedy Dr. Strangelove in places), and I think he did a pretty damn good job. For a movie this cheap, the suspense and abrupt comedic beats all work really well. So are we expecting the remake next year or do we have to wait until 2017?

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    1. I love Dark Star! There are so many little creative tricks in that movie to maximize an ultra-low budget (I'm thinking the air duct scene in particular). I think a lot of the humor still holds up too.

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  24. Grabbers: This is exactly the kind of movie I wanted to see. This was so much fun for me! I am definitely going to come back to it. The character Lisa sure helps too. Ruth Bradley, look forward to seeing her in more stuff. Random thought: Bronagh Gallagher is kind of the modern Irish version of Thelma Ritter. I'm always so happy to see her.

    The congress (2013): The first section of the movie is wonderful. Robin Wright is so great, as is her cheekbones. Then the movie gets confusing, strange and quite depressing but fascinating. I love the craziness and ambition but feel it was two movies and I wanted more of the first one.

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  25. Star Trek: First Contact: As with all of the TNG movies, I don't think I've seen this one since the theater. Removed from the opening weekend (and viewed on a computer) it feels way more like an extended TV episode than any of the original series movies. I didn't love the movie, but it did make me nostalgic for my teen geek years. As bad as some of the one-liners are, they were accompanied in my head with the sound of my dad and I laughing at them in the theater. What can I say? Resistance to nostalgia is futile.

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  26. Jupiter Ascending (2015)
    Someone somewhere on the internet is sure to have already brought this up, but as I watched the film, I couldn't help but think "This is the most boring film about trade negotiations since Phantom Menace." I didn't hate it--there's plenty to look at, even if it's with the weightlessness of overwhelming CGI, and the costume design is spectacular--but I didn't like it either. When you're waiting for Eddie Redmayne to come back on screen to ham like the butcher shop is running out of pork, something ain't right (at least he seemed game, unlike the leads, who seemed lost). I'm a sci fi nerd and I've followed the Wachowskis since Bound, so this was a disappointment. However--I think most of us can agree we'd rather see filmmakers swing for the fences than just trying to cash a cheque, and the Wachowskis always seem to be pushing at their limits. It didn't work this time, but I'm still going to see the next thing they put out.

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  27. Creature (1985, dir. William Malone)
    Since hearing William Malone on Killer POV a few weeks back I've been wanting to watch this, his first movie. Luckily it's on Netflix! It's a pretty good Alien rip-off with a few interesting ideas (this one adds zombies!), some excellent gore effects and a brief but insane performance from Klaus Kinski. The other casting is a little distracting, though, because trying to take Ferris Bueller's dad seriously as the hero is like trying to take Leslie Nielsen seriously in Forbidden Planet after growing up on the Naked Gun movies. As Alien rip-offs go, it's solid. William Malone should have made more movies.

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    1. Michael GiammarinoJune 2, 2015 at 4:50 PM

      That first scene in Creature makes me think of Millburn and Fifield contending with that snake-thing in Prometheus.

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    2. Totally. Only it's less stupid.

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    3. Michael GiammarinoJune 2, 2015 at 5:47 PM

      Hahaha... you know, one of these days, if you're game, I'd really love to have a conversation with you about Prometheus.

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    4. I haven't seen Creature, I would like to see it, It must be his second movie though, I thought his first movie was Scared to death from 1980

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    5. Michael GiammarinoJune 2, 2015 at 6:07 PM

      Scared to Death is his first feature, yes.

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    6. Michael GiammarinoJune 2, 2015 at 6:12 PM

      Creature is pretty wild. I could have sworn I'd seen it in the early HBO/VHS days, but when I finally watched it recently, I didn't remember ever having seen it before.

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    7. Yes, I forgot that one. Probably because I've never seen it. SUE ME.

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    8. Michael GiammarinoJune 2, 2015 at 6:54 PM

      No worries. I wasn't even positive; I had to go back and verify.
      There's plenty more that can said about Prometheus, Patrick. At least I think so.

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    9. Michael GiammarinoJune 2, 2015 at 7:42 PM

      I suspect you're just pretty much done with that movie, then. You've said your piece and moved on. I understand.

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    10. We're not gonna sue you we love you. You need to see Scared to death to close the loop :)

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  28. I watched Plan 9 From Outer Space (1959). Not sure I can say anything about it that hasn't already been said. I didn't massively enjoy it, but I think it's probably kne to watch with other people!

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    1. Have you listened to Patrick and JB's podcast? It's great, go to the A-Z, it might help you embrace the film :)

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    2. No, but that sounds like a great idea!

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  29. Junior: No idea. Terrible. Will listen to the HDTGM episode. Emma Thompson though. Thank you Emma.

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    1. I never would have thought of this as a sci-fi choice, but that's totally just me being closed-minded. Way to think outside the bun!

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    2. No-one needs to know it was based on your life story, it's okay, we can make it fly ;)

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    3. haha Patrick's one Arnold movie he's never seen!

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  30. EQUILIBRIUM (2002, Kurt Wimmer) revisit

    The distant future...a society with no emotions, "sense offenders", Tetragammatron-clerics, gun-kata, stylish shootouts, cool action, starring a young and gifted but unknown actor named Christian Bale!!!
    Most of the critics didn't liked this "Fahrenheit 451/1984/Brave new world"-mashup!!!
    But to me it's still an awesome and entertaining, by the audience unfortunately almost forgotten, sci-fi-classic from early 21st century!!! A must see !!!!!

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    1. I had a lot of fun with this movie! Even though the action scenes feel like Matrix knock offs, I really enjoyed them.

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    2. That used to be my go-to underrated movie to show my buddies in high school.

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  31. I did an Alex Proyas triple: Dark City, I, Robot and Knowing. I’ll be quick…

    For me, I am always more impressed by the premise and look of Dark City as opposed to being actually engaged in the story. It all seems kind of sterile. That being said, I love the commentary track with Ebert – it’s pretty much the reason why I bought the disc.

    I, Robot very much feels like Proyas being commercial. It has Will Smith, ergo I enjoy it anyway.

    Nic Cage + maths + weird angel creatures = my inexplicable love for Knowing. It tries to be smart and deep, but it’s kind of stupid. The plane crash scene is great though.

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    1. I need to revisit Dark City and check out the commentary track. I saw it in the theater and don't remember being all that excited about it but throughout the years it's gained such a positive reputation that I need to check it out again.

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  32. The Hidden (1987) - First viewing

    Surprisingly good scifi actioner about two aliens who can take over human bodies, one on a killing spree while the other tries to catch him/it with the aid of a human cop who doesn't know what's going on. Young Kyle McLachlan is excellent as the fish-out-of-water alien "cop", bemused by human customs and interactions.

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  33. Without Warning (1980)

    Low budget alien movie that's kind of dull. The alien has a disc weapon that it throws at people and it attaches itself to the victims and drains their blood. It's cool at first and it's really the only thing the movie has going for it, but after it's done a bunch it loses it's appeal. It has 4 young main characters including David Caruso, but 2 of them are dispatched casually off screen and the other 2 are useless with a bad performance by the male lead. They basically just go from point A to point B then back to point A then to point C then back to point A, there's a lot of wandering around in this movie is what I'm getting at. It's like 90 percent wandering.

    You don't see the alien until the last 5 minutes of the movie and it's slow and underwhelming. Now Jack Palance and Martin Landau are also in this movie which adds a little credibility, but their characters aren't given much to do (Landau acts crazy, and Palance basically exists to set a booby trap) for a much better horror flick starring these 2 I would recommend an 80s slasher called Alone In The Dark, it's much more entertaining.

    Overall I was pretty bored by this movie sadly. It's basically a way less awesome version of Predator so I would just watch that. Scream Factory bluray looks great though.

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  34. Outland (1981) - first viewing

    This flick was brought to my attention by Grey Weirdo on this site's recent Weigh-In on underrated remakes. I liked this a lot. Great performances, great pacing, great sets, a fine Jerry Goldsmith score, and depressurized head explosions. All the trappings of a solid genre film. Recommended.

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    1. Wow, we posted the same film within a minute.
      Synchronicity man.

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  35. Outland (1981)
    For Junesploitation it was a toss up for me either revisiting this film or Silent Running (1972), but I went with Outland. I know it's just a remake of High Noon (1954) and Sean in't the 'Coop but this film is great stuff.

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  36. Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1956)

    A brilliant conceit, simply told, that holds up amazingly well. It has been remade and ripped off countless times but this is just brilliant. I loved it.

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  37. Survivor (2014) Dir. John Lyde

    Kevin Sorbo is in this so how bad could it be?! :) Standard ScyFy channel (although not a product of) material where a team is looking for an inhabitable planet. In doing so, the ship blows up and team with our lead actress (Danielle Chuchran - "Thing One" from 2003's "Cat in the Hat") falls on a planet with some "alien people" (dudes wearing gas mask helmets, some with wires coming out to look like dreadlocks...ugh), some monsters, some big ass rocks and a horse. Commence to running around, away and at people.

    20 years ago this would have been awful and fantastic, problem is that the ScyFy movies have made these over and over so much that it's now not awful enough to be fun, it's just not good.

    Pros - Danielle Chuchran should be a movie star as she is ten times more interesting to watch than Margot Robbie.
    The secondary actress (Melanie Stone) is a full on Arrowstorm Studio actress so far and she looks like Bellucci mixed with Zeta-Jones. Do I need to repeat that? okay - here's the link http://www.imdb.com/name/nm5752523/?ref_=nmmd_md_nm

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  38. HERCULES AGAINST THE MOON MEN (1964)
    This is really more of a fantasy than a scifi, but it has moon men in the title so I'm counting it. This is a really wierd Italian movie and I'm not really sure what to say about it. I mean it's not good, it's more of a curiosity that it even exists. But it definitely has the feel of an exploitation movie, something that only exists to cash in on the HERCULES name, so a fitting, albeit wierd way to start Junesploitation.

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    1. Also the guy who plays HERCULES is constantly oiled up and it's hilarious.

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  39. Close encounters of the third kind 1977

    Directors cut
    We all know this movie, I own the bluray and I have watched the Theatrical cut and the Special edition cut before and I just needed an excuse to visit the longer 137 min directors cut.

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    1. Anything much different in that cut, Dennis?

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    2. The main scene is a family scene, a fight and a breakdown scene between the family, it makes the film a bit darker to me, it my favourite version

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  40. Escape From New York (1981)

    Why had I never seen this before? Vintage Carpenter and Kurt Russell kicking ass whilst wearing an eye patch. What more is there to say? Original, unique, sci-fi exploitative goodness...

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  41. Michael GiammarinoJune 2, 2015 at 7:35 PM

    Message from Space (1978)
    Brad L already commented about Message from Space, but I just wanted to add to what he said with some things I thought were interesting and cool and worthy of note:
    - It's directed by Battle Royale's Kinji Fukasaku.
    - Emperor Rocksia's helmet and wardrobe seem like a template for Queen Amidala's costume when she sits on her throne in The Phantom Menace. The frame pattern of the window Rocksia looks out of resembles the framing pattern of the window Luke is thrown out of in EMPIRE, and the window behind Palpatine in the throne room in JEDI, and the one behind him in that long opening sequence in SITH.
    - Rocksia and his mother, the old chrone with the Witchy Poo nose, seem like a template for the Vader/Emperor relationship in JEDI.
    -the score sounds like a mash-up of Tron with an approximation of Leia's theme.
    --The Millennium Falcon's run through the Death Star II in JEDI seems taken whole hog from this film. There's no doubt in my mind that George was flattered by Fukasaku imitating / honoring his work. We certainly know George reveres Japanese cinema.
    -Vic Morrow's wardrobe changes. Wow.

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    1. Michael GiammarinoJune 2, 2015 at 7:50 PM

      Oh, wait. I left out Sonny Chiba. No one leaves out Sonny Chiba.

      Delete
  42. Plan 9 From Outer Space (1959)
    Probably a popular pick for today. Bad dialogue, laughable special effects, weird plot, weird reused submarine set pieces. But ill be darned if it isn't interesting. Probably one of the most fascinating preludes to the UFO story that we have all seen a million times today.

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  43. Shocking Dark (1989) aka Terminator 2, aka Alienators, aka Contaminator.

    In space, no one can hear you steal. The movie Patrick first tipped me (and the rest of the world, too) off on during the Alice in Wonderland podcast is just as bad and weird and impossible to tear yourself away from as he said. It has horrible, wooden acting, no originality, and awful dialog, but so help me, I'm perfectly okay with the time I spent to watch it.

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    1. Michael GiammarinoJune 2, 2015 at 8:22 PM

      I've been wanting to see this.

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    2. Well, see it! Here you go: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Ca1N4hFFQk

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    3. Michael GiammarinoJune 2, 2015 at 9:10 PM

      Thank you!

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    4. Always! Maybe this is a good time to remind everyone that YouTube is an insane source for exploitation films. It is completely underutilized due to Netflix being the "go to" spot for easy access. I used it extensively last year for Junesploitation and am doing so again this year. It almost makes me angry cause now I am even trying to go deeper and find stuff that isn't on any streaming platform. I love the challenge :)

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    5. This one is slightly better quality and doesn't have the subs.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-P3M87hX_gs&index=3&list=FLm-5r8b4IrUwkvub1HE5FoA

      And yes, Youtube is one-stop shopping for the weird and the wonderful. It's a treasure trove of trash.

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    6. Michael GiammarinoJune 2, 2015 at 10:19 PM

      Thanks, Heath!

      Delete
  44. Europa Report (2013)

    I didn't think I'd like it. It has a lot of things going against it, being another found footage film, playing out the familiar plot of a couple astronauts who bit off more than they can chew. But I was wrong, as usual. See it.

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    1. Ha just finished watching this like 5 minutes ago and was going to post about it. I enjoyed it, even though the end reminded me a little of the Matrix--and I won't say more than that. Great acting all around and effects that were convincing and grounded in realism.

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  45. Predator (1987)

    Look, we've all seen it, we all love it. It's damn-near perfect. But have any of us considered that it could be the most AMERICAN movie of all-time? Heavily featuring 2 of America's favorite things; big guns and oiled-up muscles. And let's look at our group of heroes; a couple white guys, 2 blacks guys, a Latin-american, an American Indian, a naturalized immigrant, and a woman. IT'S A REGULAR MELTING POT! And who are they fighting against? Oh, just an illegal alien.

    Is it horror? Is it sci-fi? Is it action? None, it's pure perfection. (Also, it's sci-fi, because today is sci-fi day.)

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    1. I love this movie so much. Not only because it is completely awesome, but it makes me nostalgic for the '80s, when a seven-year-old could watch Predator with his parents and it was totally fine. Seriously, this is an insanely violent movie, and every single kid my age saw it a million times.

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    2. Agreed! This was the first DVD I put in when I bought my surround sound system years ago. It sounded amazing.

      Haha! So true, I'm pretty sure I saw this movie for the first time with my dad when I was 7 or 8.

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  46. They Live (1988)

    I simply love this movie more every time I see it. Has everything that makes a movie great: subliminal mind control, Roddy Piper (the rowdiest Piper ever?), hilariously excessive violence, a secret society of Republican aliens controlling humankind and keeping them sedated and docile, interstellar travel (complete with carry-on luggage), sunglasses, Keith David. One billion stars.

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  47. Michael GiammarinoJune 2, 2015 at 9:03 PM

    Starchaser: The Legend of Orin (1985)
    Force fever and Heath's excellent piece on The Phantom Menace moved me to rewatch several Star Wars ripoffs that seem to have inspire and influence George when he wrote the prequels.
    This animated film is surprisingly adult, despite its rating and (you'd assume) its intended audience, but those were the eighties. In Starchaser, a young slave teen finds a mystical sword while doing forced labor in a mine, and escapes onto a quest to defeat a vicious overload. The usual Star Wars tropes abound. There's the rogue smuggler, whose ship oddly looks like the Prometheus from... well, Prometheus. The hardest scene to watch involves a disagreeable Fembot who the rogue, Dagg, intends to give an attitude adjustment. It's where he has to go to give her that adjustment that some people might find objectionable. What is of note to prequel fans are the teen's magical sword piercing through doors and melting them from the inside, and a sequence that takes place in a location much like the generator room under Theed where Darth Maul, Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon have their lightsaber fight. What happens to the villain is especially fascinating.

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  48. Michael GiammarinoJune 2, 2015 at 9:06 PM

    Vicious overlord, rather. (I wrote 'vicious overload,' haha.)

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  49. Forbidden Planet:directors cut (aka Mutant) 1982

    A Corman Cult classic. Essentially an Alien ripoff with decent special effects (minus the mutant) considering the pretty low budget. What you get is cheesy acting, plently of gore, action, and nudity in just under 1hr 20mins.

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    1. You know, that's a perfect time. After listening to the commentary for Revenge of the Ninja, they pointed out that Cannon had a rule - no more than 90 minutes no matter what. I think studios should take heed of that rule these days. Too many films are a half-hour to even an hour longer than needed (I'm looking at you, Interstellar - although that movie was 2 hours longer than needed) but you get what I'm saying.

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    2. So true - it's one of many reasons I appreciate movies from the 80s so much again. They knew how to keep that shit tight. You'd think with our ever-narrowing attention spans movies would be getting even shorter, but it's like they think movies have to be longer or we won't feel like we're getting our money's worth. I've never walked out of a movie complaining that it should have been longer - except maybe Avatar. :P

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  50. Starcrash (1978)

    I would have enjoyed this more with some friends, alcohol and a mountain of cocaine - basically the same ingredients that went into the making of this movie - but yeah, it's some good awful fun. Hoff, I know why you're in this - same goes for the rest of you fuckin weirdos - but why, Christopher Plummer, why?

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    1. I'm hearing the need for the world's first All Twitter-Alcohol-Cocaine Movie Festival. Line up = Starcrash, 20 times.

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  51. Trollhunter
    I'm a big fan of folklore, so the subject matter was right up my alley. I loved the effects at the end. Some annoying shaky cam, as per all found footage movies, but very enjoyable overall.

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  52. Attack of the 50 Foot Woman (1958)

    She attacks - for the last 10 minutes! After an endless build up of over 55 minutes the movie finally cuts loose and gets to be a little fun. Not worth your time but not terrible. Just kind of meh with uninteresting characters and little to keep your interest for the majority of the movie.

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    1. There were a lot of those people-turning-into-things movies in that period that just fell flat until the last little bit. I watched The Wasp Woman a few months ago and it felt about the same.

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  53. LIFEFORCE
    A really interesting take on the vampire movie, confidently made with great special effects and great filmmaking. And it goes totally bannanas in the last act. Anyone who hasn't checked this out, like me until tonight, definitely should.

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    1. Oh and it has some really great space station stuff. The sets look really great on all the spaceships.

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    2. just ordered it from Scream Factory!

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  54. Class of 1999 (1989)

    Stacy Keach unleashes 3 teachers (including Pam Grier) on a dystopian Rock n' Roll High School and shit get bananas when the new teachers clash with the punks and dope heads that have the run of the school. I remember renting this movie when I was in middle school and made me nervous to become a high school freshman. A great lesson in teenage teamwork.

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  55. Logan's Run (1976) (first viewing)

    Definitely feels dated, but I enjoyed this one. Interesting ride from the time Logan starts his run until they meet the old man. Drags a little from there (especially the endless talk of cats and quoting T.S. Eliot). Worth a look (although I'm sure most have already seen this one). And Jenny Agutter is easy on the eyes too.

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  56. Hardware (1990)

    First time watching this cult classic. Personally, I wouldn't call it a classic by any means, but I see what people like about it - striking visuals, cynical worldview, brutal kills.

    Despite being made of equals parts Alien, Terminator, and Mad Max, the post-apocalyptic world Richard Stanley creates is its own. Its main failing is the final showdown starts about halfway through the movie and Stanley has to desperately find new ways to keep it going.

    Still, it's a hell of a first film, made on a very low budget. I wish Stanley's career had panned out differently. I think we'd be anticipating new films from him like we do other filmmakers of his generation, such as Guillermo del Toro.

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  57. Almost Human (2013)

    Holy moly did this movie go to some gross places.

    I really respect the film makers of this movie. It's clear they had insanely little resources, and they really did a lot with it. For most of this movie I thought it was... meh. It was fine. It was whatever. But I really have to say it went INSANE in the last 20 minutes. It got really intense, gross and shocking. All in all, I'm glad I watched it! Just goes to show you should give movies a chance to the end!

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    1. Watched this a few months ago, really fun. Glad it's as short as it is though. Any longer and it would have over stayed it's welcome.

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    2. I couldn't agree with that more. It's barely over an hour and that's perfect.

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  58. eXistenZ (1999)

    I'm not gonna lie, I spent most of this movie not knowing what was going on, and I am totally cool with that.

    Dealing with virtual reality gaming, and "portaling" into games, all you need to know is that they build a gun out of flesh and bones with teeth for bullets and Jude Law wears cargo pants. I was greatly amused by both of those things.

    A ridiculous movie with a rather excellent cast, I had a blast with it.

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  59. Metropolis (1927, directed by Fritz Lang, featuring the 1984 Giorgio Moroder soundtrack)

    Is this exploitation? Not textbook, no, but I’d argue that it sets a precedent for much of it to come. When Evil Maria dances seductively for the city’s rich, white male elite in Yoshiwara, Lang seems to condemn their lecherous gaze while letting the viewer gaze, too. Additionally, by cementing the “Sexy Female Robot” archetype, Metropolis spawned legions of submissive, wish-fulfilling progeny: Maria is now antiquated tech, but the newer models work the same way under updated casings.

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  60. Zeta One - 1969

    It's about a race of alien women who kidnap earth ladies to help repopulate their planet. Really fun and kind of bipolar. The best way to describe it would be to call it a mixture of Earth Girls Are Easy and a Bond flick. Lots of breasts, Lazer hands, and a 20 minute strip poker scene. And breasts.

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  61. INTERSTELLAR (2014)
    I know this isn't exactly exploitation but it's a sci-fi flick I hadn't seen, and I was able to finish it by 11:30 PST, so...
    Basically, this film flat-out destroyed me. I don't even know how I'm typing this right now.
    I have come to realize this: whatever the hell it is that Christopher Nolan is selling, exactly?
    ...I'm buying it. I loved this movie.

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    1. Yeah it really worked for me too and even more the second time - didn't get a whole lot of love around here - they just don't understand fifth dimensional beings like we do, Albert.

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    2. Hahaha! Guess not, Sol. I thought it was amazing. Honestly, I wasn't thinking about any other movies or anything else at all while I was watching -- I was caught up in what I saw onscreen and the feelings it provoked.

      Also, it helped to cement something I already knew: I will follow Jessica Chastain anywhere. What a talent.

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  62. AVP Requiem
    tip for everyone don't watch this! It is a very hateful movie and you shouldn't watch it. That is all i have to say.

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  63. Killer Klowns from Outer Space (1988):

    First time viewing for me, and I'm left wondering why the hell it took so long to watch it! From now on, I will be cocooning all my victims in cotton candy, they stay fresher, longer!

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  64. Event Horizon (1997):

    My go-to for years when I wanted to be scared, and it still gets me even after all these years. It is far from perfect, I know, but it works for me!

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  65. Forbidden Planet (1956): this movie's great! My new band name: Krell Id.

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    1. It's based on The Tempest, a play, I believe, you performed in high school. #onlybrightspot

      Delete
  66. Galaxy Quest (1999)

    I know I'm (somehow already) late, but I'm trying to catch up.

    It was okay. I don't really have much to say about it. I've seen Star Trek before, I got the jokes, but only a few really worked for me, none of the emotional moments worked. I liked all of the performances a lot (except for the aliens after 5 minutes). It was really entertaining though, and I would recommend it, I just can't imagine caring enough to watch it again any time soon. Maybe after I listen to the podcast though...

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  67. I did Plan 9 from Outerspace, because... Well yeah.

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  68. I did Plan 9 from Outerspace, because... Well yeah.

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