Thursday, April 21, 2016

Riske Business: Random Thoughts About 2016 Movies (May-June)

by Adam Riske
Summer Movie Season!!! Omg! Omg! Omg! In April, it always seems like a good idea.

• I’m sure I’m not the only one, but I’m most excited about seeing Marvel bring back Spider-Man in their upcoming Captain America: Civil War. Am I Team Cap or Team Iron Man? I so would like to say Cap but superheroes need to be kept in check so I guess I’m Team Iron Man. Never thought I would say that. Whose team are you on?

• I have a weakness for Dakota Johnson apparently so I might go see A Bigger Splash. Damn you, movie crushes.

The Darkness is a horror movie with Kevin Bacon, so, yeah, that sounds good to me.

• A John Travolta action movie directed by Chuck Russell? Fuck yeah! #IAmWrath

• Didn’t Money Monster come out like in 1998? Who makes hostage crisis movies anymore? I’ll probably still see it, though, because I’m weak.
• I’ve yet to warm to a Ben Wheatly movie, but High Rise seems interesting. Maybe a bit derivative of Snowpiercer though? Oh wait, it’s based on a book. Maybe this one got there first.

• I’ve heard The Trust is the rare good Nicolas Cage movie. I’m interested. ☺

The Lobster seems interesting. I kind of wish it wasn’t Colin Farrell in it, but then I remember he was in In Bruges and that worry goes away.

• My nephew really wants to see The Angry Birds Movie. Me, not at all.

• Against my better judgement, I really hope Neighbors 2: Sorority Rising works. I like the first one quite a bit but you know the rule about comedy sequels. The odds are stacked against it, I’m afraid.
• I am not as large of a director Shane Black fan as most, but The Nice Guys looks like a really good time. It reminds me of Midnight Run for some reason.

• Ugh. I’m so tired of X-Men. Should I skip X-Men: Apocalypse? Oh wait, Oscar Isaac is the villain. This movie could rule!

• I learned my lesson the first time, Alice Through the Looking Glass. Fool me once, shame Fool me... can’t get fooled again.

• See my thoughts on Alice for my thoughts on Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows. I don’t care if they added Krang! These aren’t my turtles. And I’m fine with that.

• I don’t like The Lonely Island but I want to see Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping for some reason.
• The trailer for Me Before You makes me almost cry. Emilia Clarke is adorable.

• I can’t believe The Bye Bye Man is a thing that will actually be released in theaters.

The Conjuring 2: Wan Direction, Farmiga and horror…need I say more? One please!

• Fuck Now You See Me 2. Like, for real and forever.

Warcraft looks dorky as fuck. I’ll still see it though because of Duncan Jones, but damn!
• I don’t think Dory needs a spin-off/sequel, but Finding Dory could be surprisingly good, kind of like Monsters University was a few years ago. Why can’t they make a sequel to Ratatouille instead?

• I’m so done with Kevin Hart so I don’t want to want to see Central Intelligence, but Dwayne Johnson will always get me in a theater.

• I guarantee you Will Smith will somehow end up in Independence Day: Resurgence. I have no way of knowing this. It’s just a hunch. Also, happy to see Jeff Goldblum in a big role again. That said, this movie looks bad so far. Too much CGI!

Free State of Jones looks like homework.

The Shallows could be cool like the oil slick segment in Creepshow 2. I’m there!


  1. Honestly, I'm sick of super hero/comic book movies in general. I'd rather the studios put out 3 or 4 intelligent, original mid budget movies for every big super hero one they do.

  2. I know it doesn't come out until August, but the new trailer for Michael Keaton's The Founder looks more than promising.

    I am surprised at the number of movies coming out over the next few months that dont interest me at all.

    Also, I have not been a big fan of The Lonely Island since they left SNL, but something about that Popstar trailer grabbed be. What is with the actually decent trailers lately?

  3. What about A Hologram For The King? April, right? You know what movie it reminds me of that I thought was total crap? Salmon Fishing in the Yemen. But eventually I will see Tom Hanks' film. It doesn't look bad.

    1. I'm holding out a little bit of hope for that one.

  4. You forgot Bourne! Can't skip a Bourne.

    1. Ow shucks! Missed that bit of title, so anxious to start reading :-)

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  5. Ratatwoille, Ratathreeille.... IS THIS WHAT YOU WANT, ADAM?

  6. I'm Team PHIL COULSON. How is he not in this movie?! He's a revived international jet-setter protecting the world from an Inhuman/alien menace! Nick Fury, Maria Hill, Lady Sif, and that old guy who order the nuclear attack on NYC in The Avengers all deal with him and his team, so why not Shellhead and Cap?! Sigh... I'll still be seeing the movie, obviously, but given how great Agents of SHIELD has been for two straight years, the lack of synergy is annoying.

    But I'm also even more pysched for X:Men - Apocalypse. First Class and Days of Future Past were excellent, with the latter besting The Winter Soldier, IMO, and this'll be the first time the gang's a real together/functioning team in a (we hope) non-awful movie since blooming 2002.

  7. Not a whole lot I'm looking forward to here.

    Captain America: Civil War - Obviously.

    The Lobster - It's got an original concept at least.

    Neighbors 2 - I liked the first one but I'm not expecting this to be great.

    Swiss Army Man - Release date appears to be June 17th, but I'm not sure how wide of an opening it will be. The trailer has me interested at least.

  8. Sausage Party! Actually, this doesn't come out until later in the summer, but I thought it came out in early May for some reason, so it counts. BTW, it's being hailed as the 1st R rated animated movie, but what about Bigger, Longer and Uncut?

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  10. You don't like Kiss Kiss Bang Bang? Why is Kevin Hart a thing? Oscar Isaac is too good not to go see Xmen. 3 most anticipated movies:
    The Neon Demon, Green Room and Conjuring 2

    1. Neon Demon looks interesting. I'm not a Kiss Kiss Bang Bang guy. I'm the worst.

  11. I've never heard of A Bigger Splash but if you tell me it's a sequel to Splash I'm so there.

  12. If present day Adam could go back in time and tell last week Adam one thing about I Am Wrath, what would it be?

    1. Lol that entry is your version of "Piccaso? Pfft, he'll never amount to a thing!"

  13. Occasionally in UK we get to see a few movies before US (but not often).
    A Bigger Splash is worth seeing, if only for the scenery and the most spectacular performance by Ralph Feinnes which is hard to forget!
    The Lobster is hilariously bonkers, unlike anything else you're likely to see and my favourite film of last year. I'm not a big fan of Colin Farrell, but he is perfectly suited to this role.
    High-Rise is unlikely to covert you to a Ben Wheatley fan. I was previously, however after High-Rise, not so much.

  14. I will certainly watch
    Captain America: Civil War.
    The Darkness
    Money Monster
    High Rise
    The Nice Guys
    X-Men: Apocalypse, despite the not very promising trailers.
    Independence Day: Resurgence, despite looking like a compilation of every Emmerich disaster movie.
    Free State of Jones
    The Shallows

    I may also watch
    A Bigger Splash
    The lobster

    I´m still not sure if I want to sit through something that bad looking like Warcraft, even with Duncan Jones at the helm. Those trailers are pure CGI horror...

    Everything else I will happily skip without a doubt.

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