Lindsay! Put it back up. Gugino is wonderful but you know what. She sucks at ground and pounds. Doesn't fit with the movie (maybe haven't caught it yet) but still very cool.
Nightmare 1 & 2 kind of have the same dynamic as Texas Chainsaw 1 & 2; Nightmare 2 works so well for me partly because of how opposite it is from its progenitor.
I understand the seven word limitation but let's not forget door corn and cranberry shirt. :) Ironically The Burning Commentary has corn water. So great 80's slashers really need corn in some fashion. Also a shout out to Mike for his "Throw the baby in the cabinets" is a spectacular round about reference to the corn hole.
I have to strongly disagree with this Zevon-themed criticism. Did you not see the buddies defeat the demon dog by farting on it, or Harland Williams riding a broom like a hoverboard?? Focus, Asperschlager!
The Hills have eyes 1977
ReplyDeleteA very abrupt ending. Just like this
The Hills have eyes featurette. Craven on revisiting Hills
ReplyDelete230 thousand was considered low budget once
Scanners (1981)
ReplyDeletePopping veins and grinding jaws equals great climax
Bride Of Frankenstein (1935)
ReplyDeleteGods and Monsters arre mmmy onnnnly weeeeeakness
Evil Dead 2 (1987)
ReplyDeletePlease give Bruce Campbell a hand everyone
These are amazing! High five.
DeleteBack at ya both
DeleteHigh fives all around!
DeleteScanners (1981) Dir. David Cronenberg
ReplyDeleteAccidently bought instruction manual for Xerox DocuMate-4700B.
Mother's Day (2010) Dir. Darren Lynn Bousman
ReplyDeleteAmong Dr. Phil's most intense episodes ever.
Light's Out (2016)
ReplyDeleteUltraviolet light's frequency should hurt Diana more.
Demon Knight (1995)
ReplyDeleteBullets are harder to stockpile than grenades.
Get that pussy off the table. Epic
DeleteBlack Swan (2010)
ReplyDeleteOh, we all know Hershey was watching.
Lords of Salem (2012) Dir. Rob Zombie
ReplyDeleteBro we gotta deliver the fuckin' Antichrist!
Lifeforce (1985)
ReplyDeleteAliens too sexy, couldn’t focus on plot.
A Nightmare On Elm Street (1984)
ReplyDeleteMost popular character was child molester, 80s.
Gerald's Game (2017)
ReplyDeleteKing adaptation incorrectly labeled unfilmmable, actually unwatchable.
Friday The 13th Part VIII
ReplyDeleteJason goes to Manhattan for 20 minutes.
Part 8. Jason takes a boat trip
DeleteTo Vancouver
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteYou mean, Carla Gugino, or did this go way over my head?
DeleteHang on, are these different people ;)
DeleteGod damn first night and I'm already screwing up!! Oh well!
DeleteLindsay! Put it back up. Gugino is wonderful but you know what. She sucks at ground and pounds. Doesn't fit with the movie (maybe haven't caught it yet) but still very cool.
DeleteMaxim Xul (1991, dir. Arthur Egeli)
ReplyDeleteXul love Adam West's goatee! (nothing else.)
Tales from Beyond (2004, dir. Various)
Adam West's "Outer Limits"! (of watchable filmmaking.)
A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge (1985):
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry. I just don't see it.
Nightmare 1 & 2 kind of have the same dynamic as Texas Chainsaw 1 & 2; Nightmare 2 works so well for me partly because of how opposite it is from its progenitor.
DeleteHoly fuck that’s funny.
DeleteFright Night (1985)
ReplyDeleteJerry Dandridge is actually a fruit bat.
Body Bags (1993):
ReplyDeleteYou can see Luke Skywalker's dangling penis.
Gerald's Game (2017):
ReplyDeleteNew meaning to "Pardon my wet glove."
Plan 9 From Outer Space (1959)
ReplyDeleteMore Tor going full bore, por favor.
Wish Upon (2017)
ReplyDeleteI want saxophonist garbage sifting dad spin-off.
Geralds Game (2017)
ReplyDeleteMaybe next time buy the fake handcuffs.
Right? Amateurs.
DeleteThe Last Winter (2006, dir. Larry Fessenden)
ReplyDeleteConnie Britton so hot, caused global warming.
Species (1995)
ReplyDeleteWho's brave enough to say it next?
It's better than Alien..................3
DeleteThat made me laugh :-)
DeleteChee hoo! :)
DeleteI'll take naked Natasha over Ripley anyday
DeleteThe tide is turning
DeleteFinal Destination (2000)
ReplyDeleteI'm almost sure it's just a coincidence.
Wins the day!!
DeleteSo good
DeleteThe Craft (1996):
ReplyDeleteFairuza Balk less behaved than my baby.
Blood Rage (1987)
ReplyDeleteWant a Louise Lasser/Kendall shared universe.
Wish Upon (2017)
ReplyDeleteRyan Phillippe makes Kenny G sound good.
Get Out (2017)
ReplyDeleteBoth sides were equally at fault. Sad.
This will be hard to top.
DeleteOkay. We can give up and go home. He wins the month.
DeletePoltergeist (1982)
ReplyDeleteYou moved the clown, not the bodies?!
Candyman
ReplyDeleteThis film’s racial politics are... what, exactly?
The Tomb of Ligeia (1964): By an immortal cat's desire, possession transpires.
ReplyDeleteSociety (1989)
ReplyDeleteProbably the sexiest thing I've ever seen
You're not wrong, Cade, You're not wrong
Delete^also 7 words
Blood Rage (1987)
ReplyDeleteWait a minute, Is that cranberry sauce?
The Dead (2010, dir. The Ford Brothers)
ReplyDeleteTagline shoulda been: "We're Ghana eat you!"
Gerald's Game (2017)
ReplyDeleteUnrealistic. Nobody "loses it" for Gugino. Nobody.
Jacob's Ladder (1990)
ReplyDeleteI love how DP's cinematographied in 1990.
The only film permitted to use the "skakey head". It started it and killed it at the same time.
Delete*shaky
DeleteGerald's Game (2017)
ReplyDeleteFlanagan needs a kick in the balls
Beyond The Gates (2016)
ReplyDeleteBrothers kill their loved ones, then hug.
Hang on, who turns down Brea Grant?
DeleteSilent Night, Deadly Night (1984)
ReplyDeleteNuns in wheelchair do not feel remorse
Evil Dead (2015)
ReplyDeleteTwo severed arms are better than one!
The Curse of Chucky (2013)
ReplyDeleteSo MANY endings! Half-expected Samwise to appear!
It's Alive (1974)
ReplyDeleteI blame John P. Ryan's incessant smoking
The Shining (1980) (International Cut)
ReplyDeleteAll work and no Scary Movie Month...
The Shining (1980) (U.S. Cut)
...makes Mikko a dull boy. Something something.
Don't mind if I do!! (takes axe to gut) Ach, I'm bad at this.
DeleteDeadgirl (2008)
ReplyDeletePus-filled bullet hole? Gonna fuck it.
This made me laugh out loud.
DeleteMotel Hell (1980)
ReplyDeleteRory Calhoun. Wolfman Jack. Together at last!
The Fog (1980)
ReplyDelete"Scene" it once, then watch it more.
Incarnate (2016)
ReplyDeleteI just got a thing for Melisandre
Return to Sleepaway Camp (2008)
ReplyDeleteNever just act when you can overact.
IT (2017)
ReplyDeletePennywise, still more trustworthy than Victor Salva...
Yep. #TruthHurts
DeleteFrankenstein (1931)
ReplyDeleteAbnormal brain installed, next step the presidency.
Wishmaster
ReplyDeleteAdam Riske made me do it again
(Pumps fist in the air)
DeleteI’m not falling for it again this year, Riske, I’m not.
DeleteDisturbing Behavior 1998
ReplyDeleteGot the worst out of the way.
Damn yeah, I own this but never feel like actually watching it
DeleteI get it, but let's not forget that William Sadler cliff scene. So insane it almost makes up for the the other 83 minutes.
DeleteGerald's Game (2017, dir. Mike Flanagan)
ReplyDeleteReminded me of Neon Demon, weirdly enough.
Blood Rage (1987)
ReplyDeleteWait, she’s Todd too? Am I Todd?
LOL! The dangerous side effects of too much floor corn.
DeleteToo much floor corn brings a mother’s scorn!
DeleteNice! What does door corn bring?
DeleteHerpes?
DeleteDwelling (2016)
ReplyDeleteCan't make jokes when nobody'll see this.
An American Werewolf in London (1981, first time)
ReplyDeleteJaws:the ocean::American Werewolf:porno theaters
Graveyard Shift (1990)
ReplyDeleteStephen Macht's accent. Were screen tests done?
Gerald's Game (2017)
ReplyDeleteGerald's (put some skin in the) Game
*shivers*
DeleteXX (2017) - Night of the Living Dead...at Christmas?!
ReplyDeleteWishmaster (1997)
ReplyDeleteTammy Lauren: When giving 1000% isn't enough.
Brilliant
DeleteShe definitely did not find her stillness
DeleteBlood Rage (1987) w/FTHISMOVIE Commentary
ReplyDeleteI love floor corn with cranberry shirt.
Blood Rage
ReplyDeleteHe's a lunatic. Lunatic on the floor.
Nightmare City (1980)
ReplyDeleteDid I get oatmeal on my face?
Gerald's Game (2017)
ReplyDeleteYou're only made of heavy handed exposition!
Autopsy of Jane Doe (2016)
ReplyDeleteOpen chest cavity or Mary Poppin's purse?
Just finished same film, perfect comments timing
DeleteFuck that autopsy shit, I'm getting cremated
The Shining
ReplyDeleteKubrick's hidden message? Artists desperately need deadlines.
Jack Frost (1996)
ReplyDeleteWhere'd the carrot go? ... oh ... oh no
Gerald's Game (2017)
ReplyDeleteWhat's better than one Gugino? Two Guginos
Twogino.
DeleteGerald's Game (2017)
ReplyDeleteCabins in the woods are happy places.
Society (1989)
ReplyDeleteNot Horror. More a Class-based Thriller.
Get Out (2017)
ReplyDeleteDear white people, you'll never be cool
Dead Silence (2007)
ReplyDeleteDoes anyone know Jeff Dunham's mailing address?
Ghostwatch (1992) on Shudder
ReplyDeleteKeep an eye on the red curtains.
Cult of Chucky (2013)
ReplyDeleteMmmm this chili is so amazing
HA!
DeleteWhat did you put in the chili?
...now watch me chew for a full minute.
The Tingler
ReplyDeleteWhen Vincent Price says scream, you scream.
The Tingler (1959)
ReplyDeleteVincent Price takes LSD? Sign me up.
Night of the Seagulls (1975)
ReplyDeleteQuestion; Why aren't the horses also skeletons?
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 (1986)
ReplyDeleteHooper does movie with Hoosiers star Hopper.
I Know What You Did Last Summer (1997)
ReplyDeleteWhat? A library website research scene? BLESSED.
Gerald's Game
ReplyDeleteThe dad was the kid from E.T.?
The Nightmare Before Christmas (1993)
ReplyDeleteStarting off light, with some goth topic.
The Burning (1981) w/FTHISMOVIE Commentary
ReplyDeleteIf Jardiah exists that bush grabbed it.
Sleepaway Camp (1983) w/FTHISMOVIE Commentary
DeleteHoly shit that bush has advance Jardiah.
Holy shit JB! You're right that mustache continuity is crazy blatant. How did I miss this??
DeleteTexas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)
ReplyDelete“Barbecue made human.... I mean humane! Shit.”
The Faculty (1998)
ReplyDeletePlease watch this instead of "Disturbing Behavior"
Mother! (2017) - All movies are improved by exclamation points.
ReplyDeleteThis made me laugh
DeleteFright Night (1985)
ReplyDeleteVery nice man attacked at home. Sad!
Tourist Trap (1979)
ReplyDeleteNeeds more Andrew McCarthy and Kim Cattrall.
Haha that one is awesome
Deletewho Saw Her Die? (1972)
ReplyDeleteJames Bond is a terrible father.
ReplyDeleteA Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge (1985)
What is the polar opposite of subtext?
Flatliners (2017):
ReplyDeleteDoes this count as a scary movie?
The Grudge (2004)
ReplyDeleteMeow meow meow meow meow meow meow
Tenebre (1982)
ReplyDeleteProbably still on John Saxon's sizzle reel.
Life (2017)
ReplyDeleteCool, a Ryan Reynold movie ... oops, nevermind.
The Curse of Frankenstein (1957):
ReplyDeleteAcquiring knowledge, death is a small price...
Berberian Sound Studio (2012)
ReplyDeleteSomeone pay for the man's flights already!
haha! I love this movie.
DeleteHome (2016)
ReplyDeleteFrickin' teenagers and their frickin' exorcism rituals.
The Burbs ('89)
ReplyDeleteHyper vigilant neighborhood watch husband's wet dream.
Death Spa (1989)
ReplyDeleteKen Foree dressed as a genie? Sold!
Gerald's Game (2017)
ReplyDeleteWho wants to sit on Daddy's lap?
Killer Workout (1987)
ReplyDeleteWhen are leopard print leotards coming back?
Get Out (2017)
ReplyDeleteI would've watched it a THIRD time.
Dead Ringers (1988)
ReplyDeleteReminded me a lot of Reserved Seating.
I always knew that you and Rob will one day share a similar fate
DeleteGet Out (2017)
ReplyDeleteAlternate ending? Where the white people win?
Halloween 3: Season of the witch
ReplyDeleteTom Atkins: Fuck first, ask age later
Full Moon of the Virgins a.k.a. The Devil's Wedding Night (1973)
ReplyDeleteTwins run afoul of Vampires and virgins.
Soul Survivors (2001)
ReplyDeleteExpected goth rave party scene, got one.
Bride of Chucky (1998):
ReplyDeleteMaybe a good guy, but Chucky fucks.
Blood Rage (1987) (With FTM commentary)
ReplyDeleteFloor corn is this years Dick Shadow.
I understand the seven word limitation but let's not forget door corn and cranberry shirt. :) Ironically The Burning Commentary has corn water. So great 80's slashers really need corn in some fashion. Also a shout out to Mike for his "Throw the baby in the cabinets" is a spectacular round about reference to the corn hole.
DeleteSpooky Buddies (2011)
ReplyDelete(piano riff) AwOOO! Scare woofs of boredom.
I have to strongly disagree with this Zevon-themed criticism. Did you not see the buddies defeat the demon dog by farting on it, or Harland Williams riding a broom like a hoverboard?? Focus, Asperschlager!
DeleteDemon Knight (1995) Dir. Ernest Dickerson
ReplyDeleteI think Willy had the right idea.
Slumber Party Massacre (1982)
ReplyDeleteGet your damn "tool" away from them!
The Void (2016)
ReplyDeleteTentacle monsters should be sexy not scary
Dracula (1931)
ReplyDeleteI really want Van Helsing's dope glasses.
The Host (2006)
ReplyDeleteGiant monster isn't as bad as government.
Phantasm (1979)
ReplyDeleteMan lifts coffin, leads to home invasion.
Black Sunday (1960)
ReplyDeleteVampire finally executed after 200-year rain delay.
Fright Night (1985)
ReplyDeleteAmy's cute but vampire Amy is SOMETHING.
Phoenix Forgotten (2017)
ReplyDeleteActually, forgettable found footage from fake 90s.
The Fourth Kind (2009)
ReplyDeleteTerrible choice to start Scary Movie Month
Frankenstein (1931)
ReplyDeleteActually, his father is called Frankenstein's Asshole.
Raw (2016)
ReplyDeleteI remember Eddie Murphy being much funnier.
The Midnight Hour (1985)
ReplyDelete"I'm DEAD! You're DYIN'! Everybody's gettin' DEAD!"
Gerald's Game (2017)
ReplyDeleteDying to read that dog's Yelp review.
Little Monsters (1989)
ReplyDeleteMy kids were awestruck seeing AGT judge.
Son of Dracula (1943)
ReplyDeleteStop the Press! Alucard is Dracula backwards!
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)
ReplyDeleteIt's finally time to pay my respects.
Prom Night IV: Deliver Us From Evil (1992)
ReplyDeleteWas this filmed on a car phone?
The Pendulum & The Pit (1961)
ReplyDeletePoe, Price, pendulums, pits, that’s alotta p’s!
That movie RULES. I love it so much!
DeleteDracula (1931)
ReplyDeleteHey, this Stoker guy ripped off Nosferatu!
Wes Craven's New Nightmare (1994)
ReplyDeleteDon't tell mom the baby sitter's slashed.
Funeral Home AKA Cries In the Night (1980)
ReplyDeleteTerrible police force, even worse concierge service.
Get Out (2017)
ReplyDeleteBeing John Malkovich for the horror fans.
The Awakening (2011)
ReplyDeleteDon't pick at it, don't pick... shit!
Fright Night (1985)
ReplyDeleteI’d do the Dirty Dance with Dandrige.
It Comes At Night
ReplyDeleteI’m still waiting for It to come.
Torture Garden (1967)
ReplyDeleteTales from the Crypt with greener thumb.
WNUF Halloween Special (2013)
ReplyDeleteI would watch most of those shows.
I got Shudder and I'm looking forward to checking out WNUF....or perhaps WSMM :)
DeleteSalem's Lot (1979)
ReplyDeleteNew antique shop features murder and layaway
The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974)
ReplyDeleteThis may just be a PETA campaign.
Evil Dead 2 (1987)
ReplyDeleteThe most fun any actor ever had.
The Spirit (2008)
ReplyDeleteI mistook "horror" for "horrible." My bad.
Fright Night Part 2 (1989)
ReplyDelete... where Charlie still struggles to get laid.
Abbott and Costello Meet the Mummy (1955)
ReplyDeleteNot as funny as Tom Cruise version.
The Belko Experiment (2017)
ReplyDeleteTalk about a case of the Mondays