I found "the hand" scene to be more disturbing than bone tomahawk. I actually can't think of anything that made me as squeamish. I held my hands up to my face. Hundreds of horror films I don't know if I've ever done that before.
Harry has been at it again. Digitally altering and changing the film. It's hard When you love something Like I do to see a different version. It's kinda like Star Wars fans reactions to the changed versions. I admit some of the new trippy effects do work. Some dont. The new Clown looks almost cartoonish. Very sublime. The new Credits do look better. The abduction looks even stranger with extra flashing lights and digital trickery. The action man scene shot now through shadows looks definetly scarier. The original one is still the best version but i love having another strange version to enjoy for a trippy change
The Hitcher (1986)
ReplyDeleteSee Rutger Hauer kill, see Thomas howl.
He he.
DeleteNicely done, sir.
Very good
DeleteGerald's Game (2017)
ReplyDeleteSolar Eclipses make Daddies do funny things.
or
Kinky Sex movie hard to masterbate to.
The Innocents (1961)
ReplyDelete.... Children are monsters or monsters are children...
Mientras duermes (2011, dir. Jaume Balagueró)
ReplyDeleteMost I've ever identified with a character. (~_~;)
Grace (2009, dir. Paul Solet)
ReplyDeleteHonestly, a little formulaic for my taste.
A Nightmare On Elm Street 3: The Dream Warriors (1987)
ReplyDeleteIn my dreams...I probably have guns
Or
Secret shame: Kinda dig the Dokken song
Never feel shame for liking that song!
DeleteNever Sleep Again (2009)
ReplyDeleteForgot to interview boom mic operator. Incomplete
A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge (1985)
ReplyDeleteAnother viewing, another step towards genuine affection.
Nightbreed (1990)
ReplyDeleteSerial killer Cronenberg, Spot on casting choice.
Masque Of The Red Death (1964)
ReplyDeleteSatan worshiping Vincent Price? Sign me up.
Night of the Living Babes (1987, dir. Gregory Dark)
ReplyDeleteMichelle Bauer vs. "Madame Mondo"'s transsexual raygun.
Grave Encounters 2 (2012, dir. John Poliquin)
ReplyDeleteGuess "meta"'s now shorthand for "fucking nonsense."
A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors (1987):
ReplyDeleteIs it all downhill from here, bitch?
Very funny comment. We love Rob. Bitch
DeleteWes Craven's Shocker (1989)
ReplyDeleteaka
Wes Craven's 'Wish I Still Owned Freddy'.
Witchboard 2: The Devils Doorway
ReplyDeleteNo witch, devil, or doorway. Just bored.
Seriously terrible, one of the most hateful, mysogynistic movie I've watched in a while.
DeleteStuart, did you not see mother!?
DeleteTexas Chainsaw Massacre 2. 1986
ReplyDeleteWhat if this is a Chef sequel?
Halloween (1978) - The classic, the greatness, the Moog synthesizer.
ReplyDeleteWishmaster (1997)
ReplyDeleteTammy Lauren (greater than symbol) Tomi Lahren.
The Lost Boys (1987): “Holy Water hairspray would’ve eradicated every vampire…”
ReplyDeleteSeventh Moon (2008): “Who gives a tour guide a t-shirt?”
ReplyDeleteDog Soldiers (2002): “Werewolf regrets sticking hand through mail slot”
ReplyDeleteGreasy Strangler (2016)
ReplyDeleteMade me wanna puke, goddamn bullshit artists!
Hatchet (2006):
ReplyDeleteHaunted swamp tour? Murderous poltergeist? Zoinks, Scoob!
Nice review Brandon! I watched this today too!
DeletePool Party Massacre (2015)
ReplyDeleteDay two, and already bottom of barrel.
Christmas Evil (1980)
ReplyDeleteWish this was more like Driller Killer
Halloween 3 (1982)
ReplyDeleteI don't like kids either, but yeah......
Gerald's Game (2017)
ReplyDelete= Average day living near Austin Film Critic
Blair Witch 2: Book of Shadows(2000)
ReplyDelete"More like Book of Boners, Joe Berlinger."
Get Out (2017) - Worst 'I'm not racist' argument ever. #eyesight
ReplyDelete---So that's what he's doing after Westwing...
Gerald's Game (2017)
ReplyDeleteE.T. phoning home really fucked up Elliott...
Final Destination 2 (2003)
ReplyDeleteDeath changes rules. Should consider that cheating.
Final Destination 3 (2006)
ReplyDeleteClose calls as entertaining as the kills.
The Cat and the Canary (1927)
ReplyDeleteWhy be such a dick in will?
Insidious Chapter One (2010)
ReplyDeleteI don't like photos of me either
Amazing
DeleteAlien: Covenant (2017):
ReplyDeleteScientists underestimate danger on alien world, again.
-or-
Humans are dumb. Fassbender is too great (two, great!)
Night of the Living Dead (1990) - Yup - still better than The Walking Dead
ReplyDeleteValentine (2001)
ReplyDeleteHeather is right, this movie is fun
Madman (1981)
ReplyDeleteIs this asshole going to stop singing?
Blood Rage (1987)
ReplyDeleteGet it? Cranberry sauce looks like blood!
But is it?! Is it cranberry sauce terry?!
DeleteIt Follows (2015) Dir. David Robert Mitchell
ReplyDeleteEven a monster can't kill Paul's boner.
Tucker and Dale vs Evil (2010)
ReplyDeleteUnexpected chainsaw dance made me spit take
Day of the Dead (1985)
ReplyDeleteAll the shopping malls are closed people!
Frankenstein (1931)
ReplyDeleteWhere's "Little Girl Lake Toss" iPhone game?
Die, Monster, Die (1965)
ReplyDeleteKarloff, Lovecraft, and AIP? Sign me up.
Friday the 13th: the final chapter (1984)
ReplyDelete"Dance like nobody's watching" given new meaning.
47 meters down
ReplyDeleteLove Mandy Moore. Sharks a bit moore
Friday The 13th Part 2 (1981)
ReplyDeleteJason Vorhees the Ku Klux Klan years
Blood Rage (1987)
ReplyDeleteExcited for the sequel: Cranberry Sauce Rage
GONE FISHIN!
DeleteHocus Pocus (1993)
ReplyDeleteThree pervy witches with a virgin fetish.
Haha!
DeleteGerald's Game (2017)
ReplyDeleteFifty Shades of AAAHH what the heck?!?
I found "the hand" scene to be more disturbing than bone tomahawk. I actually can't think of anything that made me as squeamish. I held my hands up to my face. Hundreds of horror films I don't know if I've ever done that before.
DeleteIt's a very well-made movie, but wow is it tough to watch at times.
DeleteSorority House Massacre (1986)
ReplyDeleteSeriously half this movie is dream interpretation.
House (1985)
ReplyDeleteKen Burns' "The Vietnam War": Part 666.
Evil Dead II (1987): Cabin in the woods BnB not great.
ReplyDeleteSon of Dracula (1943)
ReplyDeleteGet it? Alucard is Dracula spelled backwards!
Just as funny as Angel Heart.
DeleteSpoilers ahead
Louis Cipher is Lucifer
Get it
Hatchet (2006): Smash, rip, chop. Me 'ead's torn off!
ReplyDeleteThe Vindicator (1986)
ReplyDeleteWoody asks, "Are we driving through plutonium?"
Jeepers Creepers (2001)
ReplyDelete"So he eats dicks to grow...dicks?"
Terminator (1984)
ReplyDeleteSiri could only take so much abuse.
“SIRI, WHERE IS SARAH CONNER”
Delete“Calling, Stephen Sommers.”
It (2017)
ReplyDeleteGreatest two hour omission of all time!
Let Me In (2010)
ReplyDeleteWhile not terrible, it's far too Americanized.
Rubber (2010)
ReplyDeleteBlowing up stuff is fun, but tiring.
Slugs (1988)
ReplyDeleteHope surviving slugs reunite for Blu-ray commentary.
King Kong (1933)
ReplyDeleteRacism? Sexism? A wall? God damn it...
Maniac Cop (1988)
ReplyDeleteChin versus Chin: Rumble in Sing Sing
A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)
ReplyDeleteLin Shaye not ready to investigate further.
Don't Kill It (2016)
ReplyDeleteBlack eyes, bad CGIs: lotta fun, guys.
This movie is a blast!
DeleteXtro Brand new 2017 Directors version
ReplyDeleteThe Weirdest film ever just got Weirder
Harry has been at it again. Digitally altering and changing the film. It's hard When you love something Like I do to see a different version. It's kinda like Star Wars fans reactions to the changed versions. I admit some of the new trippy effects do work. Some dont. The new Clown looks almost cartoonish. Very sublime. The new Credits do look better. The abduction looks even stranger with extra flashing lights and digital trickery. The action man scene shot now through shadows looks definetly scarier. The original one is still the best version but i love having another strange version to enjoy for a trippy change
DeleteA Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge (1985)
ReplyDeleteThere is something that says leather daddy.
Howling II (1985)
ReplyDeleteJust fast forward to the end credits.
Clown (2014)
ReplyDeleteCool clown make-up. But that's about it.
The Kindred (1987)
ReplyDeleteKiller watermelon? Buckaroo Banzai does not approve.
Body Bags (1993)
ReplyDeleteCarpenter can't quite crack corny Cryptie quips.
Bordello of Blood (1996)
ReplyDeleteDennis Miller's wardrobe provided by The Mall.
The Mummy (2017):
ReplyDelete...or Foreign Policy According To Donald Trump.
Nosferatu (1922):
ReplyDeleteLarry is the worst vampire name ever.
Phantom of the Mall: Eric's Revenge (1989)
ReplyDeleteFine, insert tiresome Pauly Shore quote here.
Tucker and Dale vs Evil (2010)
ReplyDeleteThe most scathing criticism of millennial aptitude
Fender Bender (2016)
ReplyDeleteAlways be weary of mysteriously found cake.
Asylum (1972)
ReplyDeleteBritt Ekland is your imaginary friend too!
The Exorcist III (1990)
ReplyDeleteGeorge C Scott tackles a party platter.
The Asylum flasher is one of my favourite scenes ever
DeleteCrimson Peak (2015)
ReplyDeleteWhy does everyone pull the knives out?
The Burning (1981)
ReplyDeleteNow I've seen Jason Alexander's bare ass.
Insidious: Chapter 3 (2015)
ReplyDeleteTinder profile: Emphysema ghost seeking college girl.
Halloween (2007)
ReplyDeleteThe Spy Kids sequel we all wanted
Phantom of the Paradise (1974)
ReplyDeleteNormal Finley looks like West Wing’s C.J.
Alien (1979)
ReplyDeleteJohn puts the "hurt" in John Hurt.
Blood Harvest (1987)
ReplyDeleteWanna make Tiny Tim creepier? Clown makeup!
Creature of the Black Lagoon (1954)
ReplyDeleteCreature effects owns bones. Underrated Universal classic.
The Spider Labyrinth (1988)
ReplyDeleteApocalyptic cult has really nice underground spa.
The Bye Bye Man (2017)
ReplyDeleteOr as I call it: Lil' Sinister
WNUF Halloween Special (2013)
ReplyDeleteRecommend supplementing your viewing with household chores.
The Undertaker (1988)
ReplyDeleteIt's like Maniac but without the artistry.
Lake Bodom (2016)
ReplyDeleteNever trust the Finnish. Just ask Mikko.
You're absolutely right. You don't even know if that's my real name. That's the twist!
DeleteRob Zombie's Halloween (2007):
ReplyDeleteWorking title was Rob Zombie's Boner Jams.
Species (1995)
ReplyDeleteHas anyone figured out Ben Kingsley's career?
The Girl With All the Gifts (2016). All the gifts except being interesting
ReplyDeleteNight of the Living Dead (1968)
ReplyDeleteJudith O'Dea's Wig Master deserved an Oscar
Suspiria
ReplyDeletela la la la la la la
Wishmaster (1997)
ReplyDeletePoor Josh, forever in the friend zone
Dude, he gets dinner and a movie at the end!
DeleteI know...I tend to jump the gun with my 7 word reviews
DeleteThinner (1996)
ReplyDeleteThe next 90s horror movie I'll legitimize
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 (1986)
ReplyDeleteYay, she got the penis--erm, chainsaw!
The Descent (2005)
ReplyDeleteLeave your evidence of adultery at home.
The Belko Experiment (2016)
ReplyDeleteNot enough Michael Rooker. Otherwise, it's fine.
Sleepaway Camp (1983)
ReplyDeleteSome shitty kids do deserve getting slashed.
And some deserve curling irons getting shoved places.
DeleteThe Blob (1958)
ReplyDeletePlease listen to that teenager! He's forty-five!
The Devil's Candy (2015) Dir. Sean Byrne
ReplyDeleteKirk Hammett doesn't play a Gibson! Fuck!
Suspiria (1977)
ReplyDeleteEven maggots are beautiful at the ballet.
Zombi - Dawn of the Dead (1978) UHD set
ReplyDeleteRefn presents Argento presenting Romero (featuring Goblin).
The Hallow (2015) dir. Corin Hardy
ReplyDeleteAppease these trees with your baby, please.
Grave Encounters (2011)
ReplyDeleteHey Mr. Ghost, why the long face?
The Prowler (1981)
ReplyDeleteHard to be sneaky while carrying pitchfork.
Gerald's Game (2017)
ReplyDeleteRemember folks, always bring some extra lube.
New Year’s Evil
ReplyDeleteAnd I thought my family was dysfunctional.
Suspiria (1977, dir. Dario Argento) theatrical
ReplyDeleteI'd never noticed that airport McDonald's before!
Me neither! It somehow made the movie eerier.
DeleteThe House on Sorrority Row (1983)
ReplyDeleteThe punctured waterbed was the real tragedy
The Cabin in the Woods (2012)
ReplyDeleteDang, my money was on the "Dragonbat"
Basket Case 2 (1990)
ReplyDeleteHow I imagined turd sex would be.
And as usual you take it to 11 and I love it!
DeleteFright Night (1985)
ReplyDeleteCharley never got to eat his dinner.
Creep (2014)
ReplyDeletePeachfuzz is a sweet metal band name!
HELLBOUND: HELLRAISER II
ReplyDeleteConfusing journey into the labyrinth of hell.
It does have some good practical effects.
The Devil's Rejects
ReplyDeleteYeah Roy's in here, come on in.
Psycho (1960)
ReplyDeleteA boy’s best friend is his mummy.
The Dark Half (1993)
ReplyDeleteThe dark half of King/Romero collaborations.
HALLOWEEN III: SEASON OF THE WITCH (1982)
ReplyDeleteTom Atkins: Father, Doctor, Private Investigator, Lady-Killer