Alexandre Aja's PIRANHA 3D (2010, 88 min.) on Blu-ray 3D for the first time.How'd THIS get made? Ask Paul Scheer.orJerry O'Connell wishes those were only "LEECHES!!!"
Ruben Fleischer's VENOM (2018, 112 min.) on IMAX for the first time.Best "Army of Darkness" sequel nobody expected.orWhat the hell's Bill Murray doing here?
John Carpenter's THE WARD (2010, 89 min.) on DVD.Better title: "John Carpenter's The Rent Money."
Countess Dracula (1971)Countess Dracula more of an honorary title.
Pontypool (2008, Dir. Bruce McDonald)Canadians go absolutely batty for Stephen McHattie.
If you didn't know already, make sure to watch after the credits.
Good call Chay-berrs!
Psycho (1960)For toilets what Jaws was for sharks
Human Lanterns (1982)Kung Fu Murdering Muppets are offically awesome!
The Embalmer (1965)Formaldehyde...scuba gear...killing's expensive in Venice
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 (1986)My sex education was identical to Leatherface's
Snowbeast (1977)Snowmobile demo video trying to be Jaws
The grudge 3 (2009) Don’t worry it’s normal, hallucinations break bones….
The Haunted House (1921)That ghost effect kinda looks like sheet.
The best effect in the movie is when they reassemble a person. For its time its really well made.
Hold the Dark (2018)This is serious, that's why everyone whispers.
Would You Rather? (2012)The game was rigged! Bring back Squibb!or Not that great. Just dumb slick fun.
Death Ship (1980)Wow, later Love Boat season went dark
I actually laughed out loud .
That’s really funny.
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)Yokels make outsider art, turn outsiders inside-out.or (really for my edification)Source of Nine Inch Nails' "Reptile" sample
This is the funniest review yet (the first one I mean).
THE FOGLepers and plotholes are in the mist.
Halloween (2007)Love Haerts for Daeg "The Shape" Faerch.
The Howling (1981)I see someone stole my "O" face
A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)Home Alone totally bites Nancy's booby traps.
Spellcaster (1992)Do you believe in magic? Not really.
Body Melt (1993)What is this? I ordered the tuna!
Demon Keeper (1994)No demon here. Why do you ask?
Terrifier (2017)I wish I had watched something else.
Beyond Re-Animator (2003)Is this threequel worth a watch? Yuz-nah
Satan's Little Helper (2004)Got 'em with same mask trick twice.
Night School (1981) - Expected Kevin Hart; I got American Giallo.
Wer (2013)Wer Sabertooth spends some time in France.
Satan's Slaves (2018)Get on Spotify for those sweet royalties
Carnival of Souls (1962):Invisible to other people? Why's she complaining?
Tremors 3: Back to Perfection (2001) “Ass-Blasters?” Seriously, movie? That’s Michael Gross.
American Psycho 2: All American Girl (2002) Example of how shitty horror can be
Venom (2018) End credits rap manages to rhyme "symbiote."
The Hills Run Red (2009)Responsible for 2009's infamous fake blood shortage.
Abominable (2006)Calling a Sasquatch a Yeti is Abominable.
The Strangers (2008)Would make good ad for ADT security...
31 (2016)"As a Rob Zombie apologist....its excusable."
Halloween 3Only "Got your nose!" kill in history.
The Endless (2017)In Shalit voice: "Watching was endless!" (BLAM!)
The Night Flier (1997)She looks so much like Phoebe Cates.
Hell Fest (2018)Loved it! Such a great fun slasher!
Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers (1989):Jamie survives Michael, dies of lint poisoning.
The Dark Half (1993)"Ok... Who spat in Timothy Hutton's hair?"
It (1990)Ritchie's comedy routine is scarier than pennywise.
Pet Semetary(1989) Not a speed limit sign in sight
Dead Shack (2017)"A better title would be BOREDOM BOX."
Grim (1995)This ain't your fuckin grandma's fairy tale!
Cold Hell (2017)Give me more Muay Thai cab drivers.
An American Werewolf in Paris(1997) Souterrain Loup-Garou movement strong one in Paris.
Pumpkinhead (1988)Good ad for the local pumpkin farms...
Deep Rising (1998)Monster, Sea Doo, Cock It…Now What?
May (2002)I love this movie so damn much
Curse II: The Bite (1989)Surprisingly, I've seen worse sock puppet attacksPS I'm going to have to watch this movie 5 more times just to get all my 7 word reviews in!
Them! (1954)Hey doesn't Woody Allen star in this?
Critters 2 (1988)A lot like Critters. Only more two-ish.
House of Wax (1953)Kept waiting for a face/pipe impalement.
Amsterdamned (1988)Sign me up for that boat ride!
Deep Blue Sea (1999)Best Horror Monologue? Cue Lights Camera Jackson.
Lords of Salem (2012)Oh who has a cute puppy dog!
Mayhem (2017) Dir. Joe LynchShould've saved this for "workplace thrillers" month.
Inferno (1980)"Italian horror virginity taken. Beautiful yet uncharming."
Pieces (1982): That waterbed kill is actually pretty badass.
Frankenstein (1931)Angry mob sounds good right now, right?
From Beyond (1986)The food Foree is making looks good!
Stir of Echoes (1999) Wasn't prepared for this movie. WASN'T PREPARED.
The Boy (2016, dir. William Brent Bell)Hope Lauren Cohan thinks I'm a doll.
The only times I feel real kinship to Bromley is when he's horny. :)
Wish Upon (2017): Not as fun to watch without Riske.
Wait... you dig on Riskeverses?
Jigsaw(2017)Runtime: 92.Final exposition feels like: 93
The Demon Murder Case (1983, dir. William Hale)Harvey Fierstein as demon's voice. Perfect casting.
Night of the Living Dead (1968)So great I want to eat brains!
Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein (1948)Second best Universal Frankenstein film; behind Bride.
Beyond the Black Rainbow (2010)"Panos Cosmatos saves the day once again!"
I know what you did last summer(1997) Jennifer Love Hewitt....oh baby...bites knuckles.
Trick Or Treat (1986)Like if Chad Kroeger met Freddy Krueger
Final Exam (1981) Dir. Jimmy Huston"Well, I guess I'm the final girl."
House of 1000 Corpses (2003)Forgot Chris Hardwick was in this movie.
The Laughing Dead (1989) Alien franchise not only one with “chestburster.”
Suspiria (1977)Do witches always emit such pretty colors?
Dolls (1986)Low expectations again led to surprising enjoyment!
Land of the Dead (2005)That's not where gas goes. Bad zombie!
The Raven (1935)Best of both worlds, Poe and Universal
Those mad Doctors! Karloff's been Frankenstiened again.
THE EXORCIST (1973)Shaking bed? Must be in her head.
The Return of the Living DeadEPA to roll back zombie burning regulations.
Night of the Creeps (1986)Undead frat guys vs Tom Atkin’s Mustache
The Two Faces of Dr. Jekyll (1960)Mr. Hyde and Christopher Lee buddy “comedy”.
Vampire Girl vs Frankenstein Girl (2009)That's not cranberry sauce needing a screw
It (2017)So how's spitting judged, distance or mass?
Kaidan Horror Classics 1: The Arm (aka Kataude) (2010)Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no.
Murder Party (2007)Fun with puns and then he runs.
Drag Me to Hell (2009)One stop shopping for mouth related fluids.
The Grudge (2004)NOW I remember why it’s dust covered.
Before I Wake (2016):Dive-bombing butterflies do legitimately scare me, ok?
Friday the 13th Part 3 (1982)The most nakedless of the entire franchise.
Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978)Who's there?? [Silence] Good enough for me!
Murder Party (2007)Whoever bakes with raisins deserves this fate.
Beyond The Gates (2016)Had the same experience playing Monopoly once.