I hereby make an official request to the powers-that-be at F This Movie (aka Patrick) to make an unprecedented move during an unprecedented time in this site's history. FTM usually has three peak events per year: The FTM Twitter Film Festival in February or March, Junesploitation! in June and The Scary Movie Month in October. We got the Twitter Film Festival just under the wire before the whole world went to hell in a handbasket. Now we're almost two months away from Junesploitation!, but many of us RIGHT NOW are confined to our homes and/or forced to spend more free time than we know what to do with watching movies.
My proposal: a once-in-a-lifetime SCARY MOVIE MONTH: COVID-19 EDITION for the entirety of April. Each day, any movie we watch we write a seven-word review about it. IMPORTANT DISTINCTION: the "Scary" part of this SMM comes from the COVID-19 forcing us to stay home, NOT THE MOVIE SELECTION! It's a chance to apply SMM 7-word review rules to non-horror, non-violent, non-scary movies. Ever wanted to write a 7-word review for "The Godfather"? How about "Bohemian Rhapsody"? "Barry Lyndon"? Can you summarize "Doctor Zhivago" in 7 words? Since we're all stuck home watching movies, many of us with children, it'd also give the lil' ones a chance to flex their creative muscles to come up with 7-word summaries for "Brave," "The Little Mermaid," "Pixar's Onward" (coming to digital on April 3rd), "Delgo," "Fritz The Cat," etc. And yes, I'm freaking kidding about those last two.
And of course, if you'd still like to watch horror movies in April to distract you from the real-life horror show that are the 24-7 news channels, that'd be swell too. And hey, feel free to keep your powder dry and save the 7-word review gig for Scary Movie Month proper in October... assuming the world makes it that far. :-O
Basically I don't want to wait two months until June to exercise my God-given right to write reviews for F This Movie. I want that privilege extended to me ASAP, preferably before the world ends and I'm deprived of Junesploitation! 2020. Heck, if this COVID-19 extends beyond April and we're still forced to be on home lockdown, we could start talking about having a F THIS MOVIE TWITTER FILM FEST in May (with the FTM crew staying in their separate homes, because social isolation is a thing) in which Patrick & Co. are free to plan/schedule whatever they want: best movies from the previous ten FTM Film Fests, runners-up that didn't make the cut but came close, whatever. Point is, many of us (and it seems likely pretty soon it'll be all of us :'( ) are stuck indoors for the foreseeable future. Why not make the most of our FTM community to help us pass the time and unite in this time of cinephile need.
Anybody think this is practical, or am I whistling Dixie past the graveyard of our modern civilization? ;-) :-(
Another option that might not require website posts every day is something like a (weekly?) I Stream, You Stream forum for our streaming recommendations. With so much out there to watch, one person cannot cover all the movies that are available.
Now for "regular" movie business in this irregular time.
Monday afternoon I watched an unexpected (as in 'I didn't know he was in them') Bill Nighy Double Feature. In EMMA. (2020) Nighy plays a smarter-than-he-looks hypochondriac Mr. Woodhouse. If this wasn't the umpteenth movie/TV adaptation of Jane Austen's beloved novel I'd be more amused than in all of them Emma ("The VVitch's" Anya Taylor-Joy) gets her comeuppance from the mildest of sarcastic remarks against Mrs. Bates (Myra McFadyen). By now the material has been staged and re-staged so many times casting the right talent makes a difference. Johnny Flynn is a terffic George Knightley (he and Joy have genuine chemistry), and Mia Goth (the new "Suspiria") has such a peculiar appearance she's a dead-on Harriet Smith. There are no surprises, twists or anything in "Emma." you haven't seen before, but you could do a lot worse. Quintessential FTM arthouse 'It's fine' fodder.
Afterwards I caught little British indie HOPE GAP (2020), in which the 29-year marriage of Bill Nighy and Annette Bening (whose Brit accent remains solid despite a couple of close calls) collapses due to the former realizing too late he married his wife for the wrong reasons. Grown-up son Jamie (Josh O'Connor) is the thankless volleyball going back and forth between his too-even-tempered father and wants-to-chew-scenery-whole mother. For such a theatrical feature (three main roles, few borderline-irrelevant smaller roles) "Hope Gap" makes the most of its on-location filming in the picturesque town of Seaford in East Sussex. It flirts with being a mawkish working class Brit melodrama, but all three leads acquit themselves fine. Yep, my 38th and final theatrical film of 2020 (before NYC shut the theaters down) turns into another 'it's fine. :-(
Being forced to spend time at home made me realize I wanted more non-007 Roger Moore films under my belt. First up is Basil Dearden's THE MAN WHO HAUNTED HIMSELF (1970), a terrific-but-dated thriller about a stiff businessman who develops a split life (or does he?) after a car crash. For an actor who mostly played James Bond in a jokey manner Roger Moore does some serious acting here, especially toward the end when a crazy-looking psychiatrist (Freddie Jones, complete with a "Talk Radio"-like spinning room) threatens to outshine him. It feels more like a "Twilight Zone" script that was beefed-up for cinematic release, but the subtext (educated men wish they could let their freak flag fly) and filming techniques (two cars = two personalities) work wonders. This one punches above its weight.
A lot more forgettable and equally obscure is GOLD (1974), which has 007 staff (title designer Maurice Binder, action director John Glen, original Bond editor Peter Hunt directing, etc.) joining Moore in making a pic in-between Bond projects. Crooked businessman Manfred Steyner (Bradford Dillman) needs a patsy to stage an accident in the South African gold mine he runs for his father-in-law (Ray Milland) so he can score a stock price swindle. And since Moore's honest-to-a-fault Rod Slater also happens to be schtooping Manford's wife (Susannah York)… For a 'PG' movie "Gold" has a couple of shocking violent deaths (and a nice look at York's boobies) that are more lamentable because they're inflicted against poor black workers by a racist thug (Bernard Horsfall's Kowalski). Shoot, from the moment he first appears Simon Sabela's likable Big King character has an imaginary toe tag that says 'Will die to make life better for our white lead.' :-( "Gold" is a trashy, racially insensitive but entertaining time capsule of its decade/year/society. Stream it on Prime (beat-to-shit print), not worth the Kino-Lorber Blu-ray price.
I don't see how either a white Welsh actor playing a white Spanish character in Spanish-ruled Mexico or a white Spanish actor playing a character who could very plausibly also have been of white Spanish parentage is whitewashing, but I otherwise fully approve of this hearty endorsement of one of my favorite films!
I can actually defend The Legend of Zorro to a point. I think it's a pretty solid adventure flick for the, say, age 5-7 set, as befits its PG rating. The trouble is, it's awkward as heck to start with a PG-13 movie that appeals to ages 10+ and then backtracks with a sequel a full seven years later. But, yeah, it's not much good from an adult point of view.
Betty Gilpin was so much fun to watch in "The Hunt". Unfortunately, the political aspects of the film hurt it for me a bit. Get rid of that aspect and it's a strong 3 1/2 or 4 star flick.
Rise of Skywalker. I have no clue what was happening in that film. They were looking for a "waverunner" or something? Did they ever find it? Bizarre and just not a fun movie. Even the action set pieces were uninteresting for the most part.
"You're Next" is a clear influence on "The Hunt," and Gilpin is easily the best thing about the latter. Not worth paying a VOD premium, but a definite rental when it comes down to Earth in a few.
So the podcast this week inspired me to finally watch the original Star Trek movies, and since I’m working from home I blew through the first 3 yesterday. First of all, they vary in quality but they are definitely escapist/comfort movies. I just love seeing that old crew together. I never watched the original show much, but I have a fondness for that crew and those actors.
Star Trek ‘79 was actually nowhere near as boring as I expected. It’s not fast paced by any means, but I was never bored. Wrath of Khan is the only one I had seen but not since I was a little kid. Still just a great sci-fi flick. The battle of wills and wits between Khan and Kirk is amazing and those damn ear worm aliens still creep me out!
Search for Spock was definitely a little weird, but enjoyable. I loved the whole idea of the enterprise crew having to steal the ship for this mission and the stuff with Spock was interesting. I loved the ending as well. Oh and Christopher Lloyd was great as Klingon!
I also watched Exit Wounds in anticipation of Patrick’s heavy action column, and man, I still enjoy that movie. It’s ludicrous but I have a fondness for that weird time period of hip hop action movies. Romeo must die, exit wounds, and Cradle 2 the grave are all still movies I would stop and watch if they were on tv. It helps that HBO played them all the time when I was younger.
Anyway, everybody stay safe and healthy out there and enjoy watching some movies!
Like the middle "Friday the 13th" movies, it's odd that a trilogy with continuity/chatacters integral to the entire series' popularity emerges in "Star trek" organically rather than as a grand vision by some ditector or studio executive whim. Heck, for the longest time "Search for Spock" was meant to be shot in 3D, which led to the tech being adopted by "Friday the 13th Part III 3D" after "Trek" abandoned the idea. That's Paramount in the 80's for you. :-)
Hello to everyone out in this crazy world. Most days this week I found too distracting (work and world craziness)for movies, but I did get around to one today.
DEADLIER THAN THE MALE (1967) - Is there such a thing as Bondsploitation? All of the elements of DEADLIER... are thoroughly drenched in the Sean Connery Bond era: attractive women, gadgets, theme song, intrigue, snappy dialogue, talkative villains. Did I already write attractive women? The agents causing mayhem are played European stars Elke Sommer and Sylva Koscina; they are frequently displayed in clothing that shows off their figures. The characters were repurposed from stories going back to the 1920s. The main character, Hugh Drummond, is portrayed by Richard Johnson (Zombie, The Haunting). It was an entertaining watch. The sequence involving a giant mechanical chessboard was very creative.
The Hunt was fine. It makes fun of the far right and left. All that "controversy" was much to do about nothing. Ready or Not is a far superior film and if you are shut in it's worth your time to watch.
I'm not a big fan of Lindelof's writing and general and this one didn't change my mind. Felt like it was trying to be topical without actually having any real point it was trying to make.
I've been binge-watching the Friday the 13th movies all week.
I found myself really digging parts 1 and 2 this time around. They're totally not Hitchcock, but I suspect the filmmakers have at least seen a lot of Hitchcock.
Part 3 is what really establishes the formula of introduce-the-characters-and-then-take-them-out-one-by-one. It's okay, I guess. Every scene is brightly lit thanks to the 3D gimmick, and I missed the gloomy shadows of the first movie.
Part 4 is probably still my favorite. It has all the sex n' violence the fans crave, but the little love stories that pop up among characters feel genuine, and the Jason/Tommy confrontation at the end attempts to give Jason some small amount of character development.
Then there's part 5. Let's all sing: "Ooh-ooh baby, ooh baby..."
I hereby make an official request to the powers-that-be at F This Movie (aka Patrick) to make an unprecedented move during an unprecedented time in this site's history. FTM usually has three peak events per year: The FTM Twitter Film Festival in February or March, Junesploitation! in June and The Scary Movie Month in October. We got the Twitter Film Festival just under the wire before the whole world went to hell in a handbasket. Now we're almost two months away from Junesploitation!, but many of us RIGHT NOW are confined to our homes and/or forced to spend more free time than we know what to do with watching movies.
ReplyDeleteMy proposal: a once-in-a-lifetime SCARY MOVIE MONTH: COVID-19 EDITION for the entirety of April. Each day, any movie we watch we write a seven-word review about it. IMPORTANT DISTINCTION: the "Scary" part of this SMM comes from the COVID-19 forcing us to stay home, NOT THE MOVIE SELECTION! It's a chance to apply SMM 7-word review rules to non-horror, non-violent, non-scary movies. Ever wanted to write a 7-word review for "The Godfather"? How about "Bohemian Rhapsody"? "Barry Lyndon"? Can you summarize "Doctor Zhivago" in 7 words? Since we're all stuck home watching movies, many of us with children, it'd also give the lil' ones a chance to flex their creative muscles to come up with 7-word summaries for "Brave," "The Little Mermaid," "Pixar's Onward" (coming to digital on April 3rd), "Delgo," "Fritz The Cat," etc. And yes, I'm freaking kidding about those last two.
And of course, if you'd still like to watch horror movies in April to distract you from the real-life horror show that are the 24-7 news channels, that'd be swell too. And hey, feel free to keep your powder dry and save the 7-word review gig for Scary Movie Month proper in October... assuming the world makes it that far. :-O
Basically I don't want to wait two months until June to exercise my God-given right to write reviews for F This Movie. I want that privilege extended to me ASAP, preferably before the world ends and I'm deprived of Junesploitation! 2020. Heck, if this COVID-19 extends beyond April and we're still forced to be on home lockdown, we could start talking about having a F THIS MOVIE TWITTER FILM FEST in May (with the FTM crew staying in their separate homes, because social isolation is a thing) in which Patrick & Co. are free to plan/schedule whatever they want: best movies from the previous ten FTM Film Fests, runners-up that didn't make the cut but came close, whatever. Point is, many of us (and it seems likely pretty soon it'll be all of us :'( ) are stuck indoors for the foreseeable future. Why not make the most of our FTM community to help us pass the time and unite in this time of cinephile need.
Anybody think this is practical, or am I whistling Dixie past the graveyard of our modern civilization? ;-) :-(
I'm so down for this!
DeleteI'm in!
DeleteIt's just a suggestion, guys. Mr. B-I-G hasn't weighed in, and the Bromley household may not be ready for yet another extracurricular activity.
DeleteAnother option that might not require website posts every day is something like a (weekly?) I Stream, You Stream forum for our streaming recommendations. With so much out there to watch, one person cannot cover all the movies that are available.
DeleteIsn't that what this Weekend Open Thread already is? :-P
DeleteNow for "regular" movie business in this irregular time.
ReplyDeleteMonday afternoon I watched an unexpected (as in 'I didn't know he was in them') Bill Nighy Double Feature. In EMMA. (2020) Nighy plays a smarter-than-he-looks hypochondriac Mr. Woodhouse. If this wasn't the umpteenth movie/TV adaptation of Jane Austen's beloved novel I'd be more amused than in all of them Emma ("The VVitch's" Anya Taylor-Joy) gets her comeuppance from the mildest of sarcastic remarks against Mrs. Bates (Myra McFadyen). By now the material has been staged and re-staged so many times casting the right talent makes a difference. Johnny Flynn is a terffic George Knightley (he and Joy have genuine chemistry), and Mia Goth (the new "Suspiria") has such a peculiar appearance she's a dead-on Harriet Smith. There are no surprises, twists or anything in "Emma." you haven't seen before, but you could do a lot worse. Quintessential FTM arthouse 'It's fine' fodder.
Afterwards I caught little British indie HOPE GAP (2020), in which the 29-year marriage of Bill Nighy and Annette Bening (whose Brit accent remains solid despite a couple of close calls) collapses due to the former realizing too late he married his wife for the wrong reasons. Grown-up son Jamie (Josh O'Connor) is the thankless volleyball going back and forth between his too-even-tempered father and wants-to-chew-scenery-whole mother. For such a theatrical feature (three main roles, few borderline-irrelevant smaller roles) "Hope Gap" makes the most of its on-location filming in the picturesque town of Seaford in East Sussex. It flirts with being a mawkish working class Brit melodrama, but all three leads acquit themselves fine. Yep, my 38th and final theatrical film of 2020 (before NYC shut the theaters down) turns into another 'it's fine. :-(
Being forced to spend time at home made me realize I wanted more non-007 Roger Moore films under my belt. First up is Basil Dearden's THE MAN WHO HAUNTED HIMSELF (1970), a terrific-but-dated thriller about a stiff businessman who develops a split life (or does he?) after a car crash. For an actor who mostly played James Bond in a jokey manner Roger Moore does some serious acting here, especially toward the end when a crazy-looking psychiatrist (Freddie Jones, complete with a "Talk Radio"-like spinning room) threatens to outshine him. It feels more like a "Twilight Zone" script that was beefed-up for cinematic release, but the subtext (educated men wish they could let their freak flag fly) and filming techniques (two cars = two personalities) work wonders. This one punches above its weight.
A lot more forgettable and equally obscure is GOLD (1974), which has 007 staff (title designer Maurice Binder, action director John Glen, original Bond editor Peter Hunt directing, etc.) joining Moore in making a pic in-between Bond projects. Crooked businessman Manfred Steyner (Bradford Dillman) needs a patsy to stage an accident in the South African gold mine he runs for his father-in-law (Ray Milland) so he can score a stock price swindle. And since Moore's honest-to-a-fault Rod Slater also happens to be schtooping Manford's wife (Susannah York)… For a 'PG' movie "Gold" has a couple of shocking violent deaths (and a nice look at York's boobies) that are more lamentable because they're inflicted against poor black workers by a racist thug (Bernard Horsfall's Kowalski). Shoot, from the moment he first appears Simon Sabela's likable Big King character has an imaginary toe tag that says 'Will die to make life better for our white lead.' :-( "Gold" is a trashy, racially insensitive but entertaining time capsule of its decade/year/society. Stream it on Prime (beat-to-shit print), not worth the Kino-Lorber Blu-ray price.
I don't see how either a white Welsh actor playing a white Spanish character in Spanish-ruled Mexico or a white Spanish actor playing a character who could very plausibly also have been of white Spanish parentage is whitewashing, but I otherwise fully approve of this hearty endorsement of one of my favorite films!
ReplyDeletePatrick (H) Willems Explains THE MASK OF ZORRO (And Why It's Great)
Agree. The movie shouldn't work, but it does. The sequel on the other hand... yikes! :-(
DeleteI can actually defend The Legend of Zorro to a point. I think it's a pretty solid adventure flick for the, say, age 5-7 set, as befits its PG rating. The trouble is, it's awkward as heck to start with a PG-13 movie that appeals to ages 10+ and then backtracks with a sequel a full seven years later. But, yeah, it's not much good from an adult point of view.
DeleteBetty Gilpin was so much fun to watch in "The Hunt". Unfortunately, the political aspects of the film hurt it for me a bit. Get rid of that aspect and it's a strong 3 1/2 or 4 star flick.
ReplyDeleteRise of Skywalker. I have no clue what was happening in that film. They were looking for a "waverunner" or something? Did they ever find it? Bizarre and just not a fun movie. Even the action set pieces were uninteresting for the most part.
"You're Next" is a clear influence on "The Hunt," and Gilpin is easily the best thing about the latter. Not worth paying a VOD premium, but a definite rental when it comes down to Earth in a few.
DeleteThis is the shortest post you've ever made.
DeleteSo the podcast this week inspired me to finally watch the original Star Trek movies, and since I’m working from home I blew through the first 3 yesterday. First of all, they vary in quality but they are definitely escapist/comfort movies. I just love seeing that old crew together. I never watched the original show much, but I have a fondness for that crew and those actors.
ReplyDeleteStar Trek ‘79 was actually nowhere near as boring as I expected. It’s not fast paced by any means, but I was never bored. Wrath of Khan is the only one I had seen but not since I was a little kid. Still just a great sci-fi flick. The battle of wills and wits between Khan and Kirk is amazing and those damn ear worm aliens still creep me out!
Search for Spock was definitely a little weird, but enjoyable. I loved the whole idea of the enterprise crew having to steal the ship for this mission and the stuff with Spock was interesting. I loved the ending as well. Oh and Christopher Lloyd was great as Klingon!
I also watched Exit Wounds in anticipation of Patrick’s heavy action column, and man, I still enjoy that movie. It’s ludicrous but I have a fondness for that weird time period of hip hop action movies. Romeo must die, exit wounds, and Cradle 2 the grave are all still movies I would stop and watch if they were on tv. It helps that HBO played them all the time when I was younger.
Anyway, everybody stay safe and healthy out there and enjoy watching some movies!
Like the middle "Friday the 13th" movies, it's odd that a trilogy with continuity/chatacters integral to the entire series' popularity emerges in "Star trek" organically rather than as a grand vision by some ditector or studio executive whim. Heck, for the longest time "Search for Spock" was meant to be shot in 3D, which led to the tech being adopted by "Friday the 13th Part III 3D" after "Trek" abandoned the idea. That's Paramount in the 80's for you. :-)
ReplyDeleteHello to everyone out in this crazy world. Most days this week I found too distracting (work and world craziness)for movies, but I did get around to one today.
ReplyDeleteDEADLIER THAN THE MALE (1967) - Is there such a thing as Bondsploitation? All of the elements of DEADLIER... are thoroughly drenched in the Sean Connery Bond era: attractive women, gadgets, theme song, intrigue, snappy dialogue, talkative villains. Did I already write attractive women? The agents causing mayhem are played European stars Elke Sommer and Sylva Koscina; they are frequently displayed in clothing that shows off their figures. The characters were repurposed from stories going back to the 1920s. The main character, Hugh Drummond, is portrayed by Richard Johnson (Zombie, The Haunting). It was an entertaining watch. The sequence involving a giant mechanical chessboard was very creative.
The Hunt was fine. It makes fun of the far right and left. All that "controversy" was much to do about nothing. Ready or Not is a far superior film and if you are shut in it's worth your time to watch.
ReplyDeleteI'm not a big fan of Lindelof's writing and general and this one didn't change my mind. Felt like it was trying to be topical without actually having any real point it was trying to make.
DeleteI've been binge-watching the Friday the 13th movies all week.
ReplyDeleteI found myself really digging parts 1 and 2 this time around. They're totally not Hitchcock, but I suspect the filmmakers have at least seen a lot of Hitchcock.
Part 3 is what really establishes the formula of introduce-the-characters-and-then-take-them-out-one-by-one. It's okay, I guess. Every scene is brightly lit thanks to the 3D gimmick, and I missed the gloomy shadows of the first movie.
Part 4 is probably still my favorite. It has all the sex n' violence the fans crave, but the little love stories that pop up among characters feel genuine, and the Jason/Tommy confrontation at the end attempts to give Jason some small amount of character development.
Then there's part 5. Let's all sing: "Ooh-ooh baby, ooh baby..."
Let's keep this party going with parts 6-8. 😃
Delete