Renny Harlin's EXORCIST: THE BEGINNING (2004, Epix)Priest-turned-archeologist sulks, sweats, sins, survives, succeeds. EXCELSIOR!or Hyenas versus small children. Spoilers: hyenas win.
Paul Schrader's DOMINION: PREQUEL TO THE EXORCIST (2005, Tubi)More like "Catholic Guilt: The Motion Picture."orFurniture rearranged. Unfinished structure still underwhelming, disjointed.
LA MALDICIÓN DE LA LLORONA/ THE CURSE OF THE CRYING WOMAN (1961)Mexican but much like an Italian production.OrHas a bit of everything. Really fun.
The Wretched (2020)Drunk watch, zero chance of remembering tomorrow
A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream ChildThe Hopkins Bump is real, believe that
Lindsay October 10, 2020 at 2:31 AMRe-Animator, dir Sturat Gordon, 1985Dr. Hill is the ultimate Dick Head
Hubie Halloween, dir Steven Brill, 2020Marco. Werido. Actually earned a surprise giggle
WISHMASTER (1997, Dir. Robert Kurtzman)Divoff giving slut-eye? As you wish.
The Mothman Prophesies (2002)What's in his pocketsessss? CHAPSTICK??! Moth Meh.
Bride of Frankenstein, dir James Whale, 1935Stirring the pot is Pretorius' real weakness
Cape Fear (1991 - Martin Scorsese)Is that the Joker leaving the prison?
Vampires vs. the Bronx:Reverse racism! Vamp lives matter too, guys!
Cutting Class (1989)Solving math problems with Brad Pitt’s penis.
The Undying Monster (1942)Can I just say "boring" seven times?
Hubie Halloween (2020)Waterboy remake with a thick Halloween overlay
seriously...WHY he talkin like that again? WHYYYY?
Abbott & Costello Meet Dr. Jeckyl & Mr. Hyde (1953)Woman's suffrage subplot really gets short shrift.
The Visitor, Michael J Paradise, 1979Watching John Huston Play Pong is endearingOrFranco Nero plays an intergalactic Space JesusOrI didn't know Hawks were pro life
I first watched The Visitor on a big screen with a crowd. It was a fun experience of collective bewilderment.
THE LURE (2015) Love the new sea foam Pringles flavor.
Mom and DadDramatization of slow weekend at Cage's house
MERMAID: LAKE OF THE DEAD (2018) This movie rules! But, mermaid or ghost?
👻🧜♀️
Paranormal Activity 3 (Joost & Schulman, 2011)Step parenting can be back breaking work
Blue Sunshine (1977)Fuck lady, let the kid have puddingorPast drug use leads to bald butchering.
The Wolf of Snow Hollow (2020)Fargo with a "werewolf". Annoying lead. Unfunny.
The Wolf of Snow Hollow (2020) The best movie I've seen all year
House on Haunted Hill (1999)When Chris Kattan got the “and” credit.
Tales from the Crypt: Demon Knight (1995)Next battle, demons all wear safety goggles.
The Cleansing Hour (2020)Should have called it The Douchebag Exorcist.
The Invisible Man (2020)Pitch: "Sleeping With The Enemy" meets "Predator."
🤣
MERMAID’S SONG (2019) Killer mermaid barely in killer mermaid movie.
Friday the 13th Part 2 (1981) Who wears short shorts? horror short shorts
Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream WarriorsBest credits song or best credits song?
Bloodspell a.k.a The Boy From Hell (1988) Dir. Deryn Warren Featuring Miss Geist from the film "Clueless"!
The Apparition (2012)Bucky, Alice & Malfoy do some stuff.
Stuck (2007)Yep, this movie is still really good.
MERMAID ISLE (2019) More like Isle of Angry Guys Yelling.
Zombie (1979)"You're gonna need a...BRAINS." - underwater zombie
Continuing my first viewing marathon into Friday the 13th:Friday the 13th Part V: A New Beginning(1985) "People toss" lost art form of killing
Stepfather 2 (1989)Caroline Williams gives a great death face.
The Hidden (1987)To live and die in L... ALIEN!?
Ginger Snaps (2000)High school fear of girl/werewolves totally justified.
The Midnight Meat Train (2008)B-Coops can midnight meat train me anytime.
PSYCHO II (1983): Good Movie. Great Sequel. AMAZING Shovel gag.
ANYTHING FOR JACKSON (2020):Some grandparents love FOX. Mine love satan.
THE MERMAID’S CURSE (2019) Filmmakers, don’t make actresses swim through crud.
The Reaping (2007)So obvious, all the signs were there.
The Lost Boys (1987)I fantasize about organizing that comic store.
Red Dragon (2002)It's good but it's still no Manhunter.
Friday The 13th (1980)Crazy Ralph biked 40 miles while drunk?
The Innocents (1961 dir. Jack Clayton)These little brats need Mary Poppins instead
The Babadook (2014)Hereditary kid vs Babadook kid - dream sequel.
BLUE MY MIND (2017) “Legs… she knows how to fuse them…”
Return of the Living Dead Part II (1988)Redo first, replace all jokes with screaming.
This comment has been removed by the author.
PiecesKung fu, Bluteo, jigsaws and chainsaws, Baaaaaaaastards.....
FeardotCom (2002)Pairs nicely with your favorite Evanescence video.
Tales from the Crypt Presents: Bordello of Blood (1996, dir. Gilbert Adler)Shut up. You had me at "bordello".
Tales from the Crypt Presents: Demon Knight (1995, dir. Ernest Dickerson)Never listen to your friend Billy Zane.
MERMAID DOWN (2019) Death by flipper. Is that a first?
Ghost Ship (2002)Gonna say it. I had a maritime.
SLEEPY HOLLOW (1999, dir. Tim Burton)The horseman really just needed a dentist.
Blood Feast (1963)Think they got it? Nope - more exposition.
Found Footage 3D (DeGennaro, 2016)Mediocre movies merit making meta mediocre movie
MR. BOOGEDY (1986, dir. Oz Scott)One second longer would’ve overstayed it’s welcome.
NIGHT TIDE (1961) What a strange remake of Anchors Aweigh.
The Sender (1982)Darling, you send me...right to sleep.
The Addams Family (1991)It's still fun. Needed more Hammer songs.
Poltergeist (1982)The community pool is always so crowded.
Don't Look Now (1973)"Saw that coming," says a filthy liar.
🤣👏
House on Haunted Hill (1999)The hill seems perfectly fine to me.
Wes Craven's New Nightmare (1994, dir. Wes Craven)Freddy got some meta on his bones.
The Wicker Man (1973)Christopher Lee sports a nice woman’s haircut.
The Exorcist III (1990)Billy Bibbit's treatment is going really poorly
Hocus Pocus (1993)Perfect movie to half watch carving pumpkins
Silver Bullet (1985)Big Ed had the eyepatch before Nadine.
Poltergeist (1982) This is why pools aren't worth it.
The Horror Show (1989)Ain’t Cronenberg, but does contain chest vagina
House on Haunted Hill(1999)Million Bucks? I'd Stay. Get it Lisa?
Spree (2020)"#Horror" did the concept better 5yrs ago.
Casper (1995)That Mel Gibson cameo sure aged well.
The Lighthouse (2019)Spoiler: Robert Pattinson fucks a mermaid...maybe.
SHE CREATURE (2001) Came for mermaid. Stayed for Carla Gugino.
The Revenge of Frankenstein (Fisher, 1958)Yeah, Doctor Stein...that will fool them!
Hubie Halloween (2020)Like if Stephen Hopkins made Ernest movies.
Do I take this as a recommendation??? #HopkinsBump
Halloweentown (1998)My son loves it. It's just Fine.
It Follows (2014)Safe sex saves the suburbs from something.
The Hills Have Eyes (1987) Hills ain't got no sense of smell!
Alien Raiders (2008)Alien Monster just trying to get groceries.
House of Wax (2005)My time at the Hilton went aliright.
Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978) director Phillip KaufmanCloning so real they faked Jessica Harper
Martyrs (2008)This movie will get under your skin.
Martyrs (2015)I'd rather be crucified than rewatch this.
Antebellum (2020)This, like everything, needs more Jenna Malone.
The Thing (1982)Norwegians are terrible shots, Americans are deadeyes.
WolfCop (2014)Why didn't WolfCop fuck her doggy style?
Castle Freak (1995)Great monster performance... More like Castle Streep!
The Shining (1980 Stanley Kubrick)Hot take; this movie is pretty good.
Frailty (2001 Bill Paxton)Raising a Murderer, a complete parents guide.
The House of the Devil (2009 Ti West)More movies should have Walkman dance montages.
Thir13en Ghosts (2001)Disgusting fat man baby is TOO familiar.
Skyggenes dal (AKA Valley of Shadows) (2017, dir. Jonas Matzlow Gulbrandson)Pre-teen Norwegian walkabout probes primordial lycanthrope legend
Doctor Sleep(2019). Krueger,Jason, Myers, meet Rose the Hat
Street Trash (1987)Gutter gout gets groin grabbing grime game.
KILLER MERMAID (2014) Nero fiddles while mermaid burns… the screen!
Night of the Living Dead (1968)Humans give zombies big assist in kills.
CRY OF THE WEREWOLF (1944)No transformations, just editing and a dog.
Dark Skies (2013 Scott Stewart)Never knew aliens hated birds so much
The Wolf of Snow Hollow (’20, Jim Cummings)A fine final role for Robert Forster
Renny Harlin's EXORCIST: THE BEGINNING (2004, Epix)
ReplyDeletePriest-turned-archeologist sulks, sweats, sins, survives, succeeds. EXCELSIOR!
or
Hyenas versus small children. Spoilers: hyenas win.
Paul Schrader's DOMINION: PREQUEL TO THE EXORCIST (2005, Tubi)
ReplyDeleteMore like "Catholic Guilt: The Motion Picture."
or
Furniture rearranged. Unfinished structure still underwhelming, disjointed.
LA MALDICIÓN DE LA LLORONA/ THE CURSE OF THE CRYING WOMAN (1961)
ReplyDeleteMexican but much like an Italian production.
Or
Has a bit of everything. Really fun.
The Wretched (2020)
ReplyDeleteDrunk watch, zero chance of remembering tomorrow
A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child
ReplyDeleteThe Hopkins Bump is real, believe that
Lindsay October 10, 2020 at 2:31 AM
ReplyDeleteRe-Animator, dir Sturat Gordon, 1985
Dr. Hill is the ultimate Dick Head
Hubie Halloween, dir Steven Brill, 2020
ReplyDeleteMarco. Werido. Actually earned a surprise giggle
WISHMASTER (1997, Dir. Robert Kurtzman)
ReplyDeleteDivoff giving slut-eye? As you wish.
The Mothman Prophesies (2002)
ReplyDeleteWhat's in his pocketsessss? CHAPSTICK??! Moth Meh.
Bride of Frankenstein, dir James Whale, 1935
ReplyDeleteStirring the pot is Pretorius' real weakness
Cape Fear (1991 - Martin Scorsese)
ReplyDeleteIs that the Joker leaving the prison?
Vampires vs. the Bronx:
ReplyDeleteReverse racism! Vamp lives matter too, guys!
Cutting Class (1989)
ReplyDeleteSolving math problems with Brad Pitt’s penis.
The Undying Monster (1942)
ReplyDeleteCan I just say "boring" seven times?
Hubie Halloween (2020)
ReplyDeleteWaterboy remake with a thick Halloween overlay
seriously...WHY he talkin like that again? WHYYYY?
DeleteAbbott & Costello Meet Dr. Jeckyl & Mr. Hyde (1953)
ReplyDeleteWoman's suffrage subplot really gets short shrift.
The Visitor, Michael J Paradise, 1979
ReplyDeleteWatching John Huston Play Pong is endearing
Or
Franco Nero plays an intergalactic Space Jesus
Or
I didn't know Hawks were pro life
I first watched The Visitor on a big screen with a crowd. It was a fun experience of collective bewilderment.
DeleteTHE LURE (2015)
ReplyDeleteLove the new sea foam Pringles flavor.
Mom and Dad
ReplyDeleteDramatization of slow weekend at Cage's house
MERMAID: LAKE OF THE DEAD (2018)
ReplyDeleteThis movie rules! But, mermaid or ghost?
👻🧜♀️
DeleteParanormal Activity 3 (Joost & Schulman, 2011)
ReplyDeleteStep parenting can be back breaking work
Blue Sunshine (1977)
ReplyDeleteFuck lady, let the kid have pudding
or
Past drug use leads to bald butchering.
The Wolf of Snow Hollow (2020)
ReplyDeleteFargo with a "werewolf". Annoying lead. Unfunny.
The Wolf of Snow Hollow (2020)
ReplyDeleteThe best movie I've seen all year
House on Haunted Hill (1999)
ReplyDeleteWhen Chris Kattan got the “and” credit.
Tales from the Crypt: Demon Knight (1995)
ReplyDeleteNext battle, demons all wear safety goggles.
The Cleansing Hour (2020)
ReplyDeleteShould have called it The Douchebag Exorcist.
The Invisible Man (2020)
ReplyDeletePitch: "Sleeping With The Enemy" meets "Predator."
🤣
DeleteMERMAID’S SONG (2019)
ReplyDeleteKiller mermaid barely in killer mermaid movie.
Friday the 13th Part 2 (1981)
ReplyDeleteWho wears short shorts? horror short shorts
Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors
ReplyDeleteBest credits song or best credits song?
Bloodspell a.k.a The Boy From Hell (1988) Dir. Deryn Warren
ReplyDeleteFeaturing Miss Geist from the film "Clueless"!
The Apparition (2012)
ReplyDeleteBucky, Alice & Malfoy do some stuff.
Stuck (2007)
ReplyDeleteYep, this movie is still really good.
MERMAID ISLE (2019)
ReplyDeleteMore like Isle of Angry Guys Yelling.
Zombie (1979)
ReplyDelete"You're gonna need a...BRAINS." - underwater zombie
Continuing my first viewing marathon into Friday the 13th:
ReplyDeleteFriday the 13th Part V: A New Beginning(1985) "People toss" lost art form of killing
Stepfather 2 (1989)
ReplyDeleteCaroline Williams gives a great death face.
The Hidden (1987)
ReplyDeleteTo live and die in L... ALIEN!?
Ginger Snaps (2000)
ReplyDeleteHigh school fear of girl/werewolves totally justified.
The Midnight Meat Train (2008)
ReplyDeleteB-Coops can midnight meat train me anytime.
PSYCHO II (1983): Good Movie. Great Sequel. AMAZING Shovel gag.
ReplyDeleteANYTHING FOR JACKSON (2020):
ReplyDeleteSome grandparents love FOX. Mine love satan.
THE MERMAID’S CURSE (2019)
ReplyDeleteFilmmakers, don’t make actresses swim through crud.
The Reaping (2007)
ReplyDeleteSo obvious, all the signs were there.
The Lost Boys (1987)
ReplyDeleteI fantasize about organizing that comic store.
Red Dragon (2002)
ReplyDeleteIt's good but it's still no Manhunter.
Friday The 13th (1980)
ReplyDeleteCrazy Ralph biked 40 miles while drunk?
The Innocents (1961 dir. Jack Clayton)
ReplyDeleteThese little brats need Mary Poppins instead
The Babadook (2014)
ReplyDeleteHereditary kid vs Babadook kid - dream sequel.
BLUE MY MIND (2017)
ReplyDelete“Legs… she knows how to fuse them…”
Return of the Living Dead Part II (1988)
ReplyDeleteRedo first, replace all jokes with screaming.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
DeletePieces
ReplyDeleteKung fu, Bluteo, jigsaws and chainsaws, Baaaaaaaastards.....
FeardotCom (2002)
ReplyDeletePairs nicely with your favorite Evanescence video.
Tales from the Crypt Presents: Bordello of Blood (1996, dir. Gilbert Adler)
ReplyDeleteShut up. You had me at "bordello".
Tales from the Crypt Presents: Demon Knight (1995, dir. Ernest Dickerson)
ReplyDeleteNever listen to your friend Billy Zane.
MERMAID DOWN (2019)
ReplyDeleteDeath by flipper. Is that a first?
Ghost Ship (2002)
ReplyDeleteGonna say it. I had a maritime.
SLEEPY HOLLOW (1999, dir. Tim Burton)
ReplyDeleteThe horseman really just needed a dentist.
Blood Feast (1963)
ReplyDeleteThink they got it? Nope - more exposition.
Found Footage 3D (DeGennaro, 2016)
ReplyDeleteMediocre movies merit making meta mediocre movie
MR. BOOGEDY (1986, dir. Oz Scott)
ReplyDeleteOne second longer would’ve overstayed it’s welcome.
NIGHT TIDE (1961)
ReplyDeleteWhat a strange remake of Anchors Aweigh.
The Sender (1982)
ReplyDeleteDarling, you send me...right to sleep.
The Addams Family (1991)
ReplyDeleteIt's still fun. Needed more Hammer songs.
Poltergeist (1982)
ReplyDeleteThe community pool is always so crowded.
Don't Look Now (1973)
ReplyDelete"Saw that coming," says a filthy liar.
🤣👏
DeleteHouse on Haunted Hill (1999)
ReplyDeleteThe hill seems perfectly fine to me.
Wes Craven's New Nightmare (1994, dir. Wes Craven)
ReplyDeleteFreddy got some meta on his bones.
The Wicker Man (1973)
ReplyDeleteChristopher Lee sports a nice woman’s haircut.
The Exorcist III (1990)
ReplyDeleteBilly Bibbit's treatment is going really poorly
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteHocus Pocus (1993)
ReplyDeletePerfect movie to half watch carving pumpkins
Silver Bullet (1985)
ReplyDeleteBig Ed had the eyepatch before Nadine.
Poltergeist (1982)
ReplyDeleteThis is why pools aren't worth it.
The Horror Show (1989)
ReplyDeleteAin’t Cronenberg, but does contain chest vagina
House on Haunted Hill(1999)
ReplyDeleteMillion Bucks? I'd Stay. Get it Lisa?
Spree (2020)
ReplyDelete"#Horror" did the concept better 5yrs ago.
Casper (1995)
ReplyDeleteThat Mel Gibson cameo sure aged well.
The Lighthouse (2019)
ReplyDeleteSpoiler: Robert Pattinson fucks a mermaid...maybe.
SHE CREATURE (2001)
ReplyDeleteCame for mermaid. Stayed for Carla Gugino.
The Revenge of Frankenstein (Fisher, 1958)
ReplyDeleteYeah, Doctor Stein...that will fool them!
🤣👏
DeleteHubie Halloween (2020)
ReplyDeleteLike if Stephen Hopkins made Ernest movies.
Do I take this as a recommendation??? #HopkinsBump
DeleteHalloweentown (1998)
ReplyDeleteMy son loves it. It's just Fine.
It Follows (2014)
ReplyDeleteSafe sex saves the suburbs from something.
The Hills Have Eyes (1987)
ReplyDeleteHills ain't got no sense of smell!
Alien Raiders (2008)
ReplyDeleteAlien Monster just trying to get groceries.
House of Wax (2005)
ReplyDeleteMy time at the Hilton went aliright.
Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978) director Phillip Kaufman
ReplyDeleteCloning so real they faked Jessica Harper
Martyrs (2008)
ReplyDeleteThis movie will get under your skin.
Martyrs (2015)
ReplyDeleteI'd rather be crucified than rewatch this.
Antebellum (2020)
ReplyDeleteThis, like everything, needs more Jenna Malone.
The Thing (1982)
ReplyDeleteNorwegians are terrible shots, Americans are deadeyes.
WolfCop (2014)
ReplyDeleteWhy didn't WolfCop fuck her doggy style?
Castle Freak (1995)
ReplyDeleteGreat monster performance... More like Castle Streep!
The Shining (1980 Stanley Kubrick)
ReplyDeleteHot take; this movie is pretty good.
Frailty (2001 Bill Paxton)
ReplyDeleteRaising a Murderer, a complete parents guide.
The House of the Devil (2009 Ti West)
ReplyDeleteMore movies should have Walkman dance montages.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteThir13en Ghosts (2001)
DeleteDisgusting fat man baby is TOO familiar.
Skyggenes dal (AKA Valley of Shadows) (2017, dir. Jonas Matzlow Gulbrandson)
ReplyDeletePre-teen Norwegian walkabout probes primordial lycanthrope legend
Doctor Sleep(2019). Krueger,Jason, Myers, meet Rose the Hat
ReplyDeleteStreet Trash (1987)
ReplyDeleteGutter gout gets groin grabbing grime game.
KILLER MERMAID (2014)
ReplyDeleteNero fiddles while mermaid burns… the screen!
Night of the Living Dead (1968)
ReplyDeleteHumans give zombies big assist in kills.
CRY OF THE WEREWOLF (1944)
ReplyDeleteNo transformations, just editing and a dog.
Dark Skies (2013 Scott Stewart)
ReplyDeleteNever knew aliens hated birds so much
The Wolf of Snow Hollow (’20, Jim Cummings)
ReplyDeleteA fine final role for Robert Forster