This is the day in my #SMM Calendar that I was looking forward to the most. It did not disappoint, and I can't believe it took me three decades to finally pop my cherry with the first two titles. :-)
George P. Cosmatos' LEVIATHAN (1989, Amazon Prime) for the first time.
Ernie Hudson's best work until you-know-what. #BLM.
or
Tri-Oceanic Corp., the K-Mart of Weyland-Yutani subsidiaries.
or
--EVIL-LYN: 'Hi!' --ROBOCOP: POW! Roll credits. ★★★★★
This is the day in my #SMM Calendar that I was looking forward to the most. It did not disappoint, and I can't believe it took me three decades to finally pop my cherry with the first two titles. :-)
ReplyDeleteGeorge P. Cosmatos' LEVIATHAN (1989, Amazon Prime) for the first time.
Ernie Hudson's best work until you-know-what. #BLM.
or
Tri-Oceanic Corp., the K-Mart of Weyland-Yutani subsidiaries.
or
--EVIL-LYN: 'Hi!'
--ROBOCOP: POW!
Roll credits. ★★★★★
Sean S. Cunningham's DEEP STAR SIX (1989, Amazon Prime) for the first time.
ReplyDeleteSnyder, crew ineptitude as dangerous as monster.
or
"DS6" underwater toy/rubber monster. By Kenner.
Renny Harlin's DEEP BLUE SEA (1999, Hulu)
ReplyDeleteShitty CG notwithstanding, a fucking blast! Cohaagen?!?!
or
At least Thomas has that Tampa gig.
THE RELIC (1997, Dir. Peter Hyams)
ReplyDeleteMan Munching Monster meets Massive Meth Maniac.
Body Melt, dir Philip Brophy,1993
ReplyDeleteNobody ever expects death by vicious placenta
Disturbing Behaviour, dir David Nutter, 1998
ReplyDeleteMaybe drowns too much in 1998 ennui
Dr. Giggles ('92, Coto)
ReplyDeleteMore endings than Return of the King.
HUSH... HUSH, SWEET CHARLOTTE (1964)
ReplyDeleteSame team as Baby Jane but better.
Or
A great showcase for the lead actresses.
Silent Rage, dir Michael Miller, 1982
ReplyDeleteChuck has loose hiring methods for deputies
Or
Jigsaw of different movies. No Pieces though
The Chill Factor (1993) aka Demon Possessed
ReplyDeleteKaren, snowmobiles and Ouija boards doesn’t mix.
RESIDENT EVIL (2002)
ReplyDeleteThe studio chose this over George Romero?
Videodrome (1982)
ReplyDeleteGrossest part of the movie? James Woods.
Howling 2: Your sister is a werewolf (1985)
ReplyDeleteSybil’s Stirba simply stunning in silly sequel.
The Legend of Boggy Creek (1972, dir. Charles B. Pierce)
ReplyDelete"Horror" "documentary:" "Bigfoot" "terrorizes" "real people..." "scary"
The Fog (1980)
ReplyDeleteWeatherman predicts 100 percent change of death
RESIDNET VIL: APOCALYPSE (2004)
ReplyDeletePlot: four minutes. Shooting guns: ninety minutes.
Snakes on a Plane (2006)
ReplyDeletePlayed mostly straight despite premise, bad CG
Paranorman (2012)
ReplyDeleteClairvoyant preteen bonds with murdered ghost girl
Silent Hill (2006)
ReplyDeleteSpoiler Alert: Sean Bean does not die.
Masque of the Red Death (1964)
ReplyDeleteDon't look now, Nicolas Roeg is cinematographer.
Hellraiser
ReplyDeleteOnly trust cubes labeled "Made in China"
Wolf (1994)
ReplyDeleteJack Nicholson pees on James Spader's shoes.
Jeepers Creepers 2 (2003)
ReplyDeleteWhat, did they lose the music rights?
RESIDENT EVIL: EXTINCTION (2007)
ReplyDeletePart 2’s cliffhanger? Let’s just ignore that.
Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 (1986)
ReplyDeleteStretch gets wet for that ice-cold chainsaw
The Haunting (1999)
ReplyDelete"Wow" - Owen Wilson, reacting to ghostly events.
Get Out (2017)
ReplyDeleteI'll take hypnosis til Trump's gone please.
Dawn of the Dead (2004 - Zack Snyder)
ReplyDeleteMichael Kelly has an explosive character arc.
or
Pro birth advice: give something to bite.
or
"Where is Monica?" "She had to split."
Hocus Pocus (1993)
ReplyDeleteThat first act is fresher than bakery
April Fool's Day (1986)
ReplyDeleteMajor slasher movie innovation: everyone's likeable.
Death Becomes Her (1992, dir. Robert Zemeckis)
ReplyDeleteLike Mandy's chainsaw fight, but with shovels.
RESIDENT EVIL: AFTERLIFE (2010)
ReplyDeleteIs this the most boring horror franchise?
Grizzly (1976 Dir. William Girdler)
ReplyDeleteTHE perfect way to end my birthday
HOWLING (1981)
ReplyDeleteNews Reporter decides she prefers Doggie Chow!
RESIDENT EVIL: RETRIBUTION (2012)
ReplyDeleteYes, it’s the most boring horror franchise.
Minotaur (2006)
ReplyDeleteTom Hardy can't even save this one.
The Guest (2014)
ReplyDeleteFucking awesome in every way. DAN STEVENS!
Needful Things (1993)
ReplyDeleteCastle Rock: The devil's in the retails.
Yes! Bravo!
DeleteThe Shallows (2016)
ReplyDeleteScenery chewing shark inspires Blake Lively's ingenuity.
31 (2016) director Rob Zombie
ReplyDeleteThe Texas Chainsaw Funhouse Running Man Massacre.
Also...
"31" for #31. Here's to 31 more!
The People Under the Stairs (1991, dir. Wes Craven)
ReplyDeleteThe alternative history of the Dursley family.
Fantasy Island (2020)
ReplyDeleteHaving likeable characters shouldn't be this hard
Demonia (1990)
ReplyDeleteI'll have nun of that, thank you!
RESIDENT EVIL: THE FINAL CHAPTER (2016)
ReplyDeleteI’ve never cared less about a series.
The Postcard Killings (2020)
ReplyDeleteWhat Famke do to her face?!
*did
DeleteThey don’t think it be like it is, but it do.
DeleteJaws: The Revenge (1987)
ReplyDeletePrecedent setter in shark restraining order law
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ReplyDeleteDourif is so great in this!
DeleteHe totally steals the movie away from George C. Scott and never gives it back.
Delete(ugh, I'll try this again)...
DeleteExorcist III (1990, dir. Peter William Blatty)
C. Everett Koop ordered the chicken soup
or
Brad Dourif: The Meryl Streep of Horror
Lake Bodom (2017)
ReplyDeleteIf you’re expecting giant alligators, forget it...
Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark (2019)
ReplyDeleteAngry ghost in need of big hug
When A Stranger Calls (1979)
ReplyDeleteLegendary opening, solid ending, sleep inducing middle
Deep Rising (1998) director Stephen Sommers
ReplyDeleteExpected "Poseidon", got "20,000 Leagues: Under Siege"
Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein (1948)
ReplyDeleteUniversal Monsters go on a high note
Fantasy Island (2020)
ReplyDeleteIt's official, can watch Pena in anything.
Books of Blood (2020)
ReplyDeleteUsing biodegradable insulation is really quite responsible.
Demon Knight (1995)
ReplyDeleteSo much fun. Two big thumbs up!
A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge (1985)
ReplyDeleteRevenge, dish best served... by random teen?
Body at Brighton Rock (2019)
ReplyDeletePretty intense at times. Not bad, actually.
It Follows (2014)
ReplyDeleteUnstoppable deadly virus allegory? Ahead of time.
MUNCHIES (1987)
ReplyDeleteLacks the quiet contemplative subtlety of Critters.
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ReplyDeleteMaximum Overdrive (1984 (with commentary 2014))
DeleteJB's joy at cupcake gives me life
I marathoned The Final Destination franchise.
ReplyDeleteFinal Destination
That teacher was Beautiful. She was Smokin.
Final Destination 2
The Glass death is the best. Clearly.
Final Destination 3
They really nailed the hardware store death.
The Final Destination
Girl at the race got TIREd fast.
Final Destination 5
Gymnasts bend over backwards to impress others.
The Editor (2014)
ReplyDeleteCake throwing will never not be funny.
Inseminoid (1981)
ReplyDeletePeople scream I think? I was asleep.
The Stuff (1985)
ReplyDeleteAt least Stuff doesn't make you poop.
The Craft (1996)
ReplyDeleteBetter teen girl metaphor: witches or werewolves?
Hubie Halloween (2020)
ReplyDeleteI was very tired, laughed too much.
Friday the 13th Part 3 (1982)
ReplyDeleteShelly's hair even more beautiful in 4K!
City of the Living Dead (1980)
ReplyDelete"Representation matters." - Le Chiffre through bloody tears
In the tall grass (2019)
ReplyDeleteChallenges the happening grass for top seed.
The Bye Bye Man (2017): Name equivalent of 'don't push that button'
ReplyDeleteSLAUGHTER HIGH (1986)
ReplyDeleteIs slaughter an elective or an extracurricular?
Apostle (2017): King and country or Goddess and island?
ReplyDeleteSpider Baby (1967)
ReplyDeleteHave things gone too far? Try dynamite!
From Beyond (1986)
ReplyDeleteSadly kimonos didn't become official scientist uniforms
(Not part of the review: I could make 100 of these from this movie, just wow)
Silent Night, Deadly Night Part 2 (1987) Dir. Lee Harry
ReplyDeleteBetter review repurposed to make this review.
Witches in the Woods (2019)
ReplyDeleteIma sucker for snow horror. Not terrible.
Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)
ReplyDeleteIt is a great PSA for trespassing.
Dead and Buried (1981)
ReplyDeleteDeath becomes her, and him, and her...
Little Monsters (2019)
ReplyDeleteHappy Josh Gad got to be himself
Fright Night (1985)
ReplyDeleteVampires are bats. Familiars are goopy sand?
I Know What You Did Last Summer(1997)Vanishing body and crabs trick still baffles
ReplyDeleteThe Human Centipede 2 (Full Sequence)
ReplyDeleteYou reap what you sow, or staple
Sugar Hill (1974) director Paul Maslansky
ReplyDeleteAnyone confused when Samedi sang The Archies?
Hubie Halloween (2020)
ReplyDeleteI realllly hate that I laughed....often
DeepStar Six (1989)
ReplyDeleteMonster appears at minute 67 of 99.
The Slayer (1982, dir. J.S. Cardone)
ReplyDeleteFour yuppies die? What killed them? [shrug]
Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter
ReplyDeleteThis movie is not a dead fuck
Dark skies (2013)
ReplyDeleteAliens attempt to abduct child. They succeed.
URBAN LEGENDS: FINAL CUT (2000)
ReplyDeleteStudent films have multimillion dollar production value?
Fear (Foley, 1996)
ReplyDeleteMarky Mark's funky bunch become CSI case
The Cabin in the Woods (2011)
ReplyDeleteBut when I kiss wolves it’s weird???
House on Haunted Hill (1959)
ReplyDeleteSounds better than Haunted House on Hill
Club Dread (Jay Chandrasekhar, 2004)
ReplyDeleteWould absolutely see Coconut Pete in concert
The Monster Squad (1987)
ReplyDeleteTom Noonan playing himself.
And three words.
Theater of Blood(1973)
ReplyDeletePrice has a blast. Edwina has Stache
The Fury (1978)
ReplyDeleteKirk Douglas lived for 42 more years
The Mummy (1959)
ReplyDeleteDrunken Irishman is cherry on racist sundae.
Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives (1986) director Tom McLoughlin
ReplyDeleteCort ramps camper's consol, camper ramps counselors
Santa Sangre:
ReplyDeleteI don't think that asylum cured him
Alone (2020)
ReplyDeleteFight should've been in sporting goods store.
28 Day Later (2008)
ReplyDeleteCurious George? No, more like Furious George.
Sleepy Hollow (1999 Tim Burton)
ReplyDeleteI never knew decapitation could become boring.
Have you not seen "Starship Troopers?" ;-)
DeleteNear Dark (1987)
ReplyDeleteVampire drifter learns how to shift... er.
Repo! The Genetic Opera (2008)
ReplyDeleteParis Hilton saves face despite dropping hers.
Wounds ( 2019 Babak Anvari)
ReplyDeleteNever, ever go through Someone else’s phone
3 From Hell (2019)
ReplyDeleteSheri Moon Zombie music montages meliorates movie.
Vampires (1998)
ReplyDeleteUnsure outfitted Baldwin hunting Tremors or dinosaurs?
Vampires vs the Bronx (2020)
ReplyDeleteDo not let The Right one In.
Frankenhooker (1990)
ReplyDeleteUm, technically frankenhooker is the doctor's name
Theatre of Blood (1973)
ReplyDeleteVincent Price once again plagiarizing Dana Carvey
or
Master of Disguise has trampoline fencing fight.
Dawn of the Dead (1978)
ReplyDeleteDoug is probably watching this right now.
House of Wax (2005 Jaume Collet-Serra)
ReplyDelete“Eliminate abandoned murder towns” new Census slogan
Mohawk (2017) (via Shudder)
ReplyDeleteSyracuse is only slightly more fun now
Fade to Black (1980)
ReplyDeleteApparently toxic fandom was always a thing.