'WILLIAM PETER BLATTY'S CINEMATIC UNIVERSE TRILOGY!' (PLUS A COUPLE OF CHEAP KNOCKOFFS)William Friedkin's THE EXORCIST: THE VERSION YOU'VE NEVER SEEN [Blatty's preferred edit] (1973/2000, Blu-ray).♬ Spiderwalk SpiderwalkDammit Friendkin Keep the Shot ♫OR'Captain Howdy's' Pazuzu's Facebook/TikTok handle. #DontRemakeThis
William Peter Blatty's THE NINTH CONFIGURATION (1980, TUBI) for the first time. Also streaming on Pluto, IMDB TV, Shudder, etc.As up-its-own-ass pretentious as "Exorcist's" sincerely disturbing.ORScarier than mental illness? Mustache-less Stacy Keach.
William Peter Blatty's THE EXORCIST III - THEATRICAL CUT (1990, Scream! Factory Blu-ray). Also streaming on TUBI, VUDU, PLEX, Peacock, etc.Say, "The Fly's" my favorite movie too! ORKinderman's too old for this demonic shit.ORRare instance telling, not showing, is scarier.
Jon Boorman's EXORCIST II: THE HERETIC - ORIGINAL THEATRICAL CUT (1977, Scream! Factory Blu-ray). Also streaming on HBO Max.Fly Africa's unfriendly skies. Pazuzu's Wings Airlines.
William Girdler's ABBY, aka THE BLAXORCIST (1974, YouTube) for the first time.Pimp motherfucking priest bitch-slaps whiny demon around!ORChallenging hubby's masculinity? Kick in the pants!
The Town That Dreaded Sundown (1976) dir Charles B PierceLess Friday the 13th, more Dateline NBC.
Malignant, dir James Wan, 2021Well, he will always have her back
VFW (2019)Veterans fight war on drugs. Excessive Neon.
Fade to Black, dir Vernon Zimmerman, 1980The ultimate movie love for movie lovers.
Victor Crowely, dir Adam Green, 2017That's not where you put a phone.
Crawl (2019)Florida Gators Womens Swim Team's favorite movie.
Darkness Falls (2003, Dir. Jonathan Liebesman) Hey dingbats, ever consider renaming the town?!
Lamb (2021)So, wait....does this mean Torgo pro-created?
THE VOYEURS (2021) Five more plot twists during this sentence.
Halloween Kills (2021)Evil dies Tonight, or takes a naporEvil, Evil, Evil, egg, Evil and EvilorKaren! Karen you are in my spot…
The Haunting (1999, dir. Jan de Bont)Owen Wilson says five wows. I counted.
THE PIT AND THE PENDULUM (1961)They paid the Price for their infidelity
Practical Magic (1998)Would sell soul for that seaside house.
Resident Evil: Afterlife (2010)Dir: Paul W.S. Anderson(Overheard in writer’s room)“Ok listen…have y’all seen The Matrix?”
Halloween Kills (2021)Dir: David Gordon GreenMinnie and Moskowitz Anchor Bay DVD owners?
Halloween Kills (2021)Can sequels make prior installments worse retrospectively?
The Howling (Joe Dante, 1981)Howl of a year for werewolf movies
Taste the Blood of Dracula (1970) Alternately: Dracula Kill! If You Live, Drink!
Halloween II (1981)Hospital runs Halloween night with skeleton staff.
The Final Destination (2009) Dir. David Ellis Not one character ever says "Damnit Janet!"
The Victim (2011)You will not believe where Michael's Biehn!
Gerald’s Game (2017)Even tied up, Gugino still kicks ass!
Dagon(2001). "Squid Game" something quite different in Imboca
WILLY'S WONDERLAND (2021) Freddy Fazbear must've hired the laziest lawyers.
The Addams Family (1991)So horny Danny Steinmann could have directed
Addams Family Values (1993) Do like the first one, but hornier.
They Live (1988)Punch! Punch! Punch! Punch! Punch! Punch! Punch!
THE ALPHA INCIDENT (1978)Finally! The true story of the Covid.
Piranha 3D (2010)How was O'Connell snubbed by the Academy?!
The Town That Dreaded Sundown (1976, dir. Charles B. Pierce)Ben Johnson is one of the coolest
The Faculty (1998)Feels made to be a $6.99 PVT
The Exorcist (1973)Friedkin scary is good rival for 2020.
FLESH, TEXAS (2009) Just imagine if John Waters directed this.
Dracula (1979, dir. John Badham)Less scary than Langella's other villain, Nixon.
Halloween Kills (2021)Evil dies tonight or possibly next year
HALLOWEEN III : SEASON ON THE WITCH (1982) Do kids even watch television any more?
Q (1982)Anyone else wonder where is Mr. Q?
The Medium (2021)Best fake documentary I've seen in awhile.
Ritual (2002, Avi Nesher)Still making racist "voodoo" movies in 2002orDr. Frank-N-furter retires to Jamaica, goes straight
It’s Alive (1974)Give babies the right to Due Process!
The Funhouse (1981, dir. Tobe Hooper)Almost as fun as watching this together
Insidious (2010)On ‘Further’ inspection Darth Maul has hooves
Deep Red (1975)Months building that puppet. Totally worth it
Scream 4 (2011)Scary movie, or advice for bad golfers.
The Bride of Frankenstein (1935) Heterosexual Life Is A Prison: The Movie
The Legend of the Seven Golden Vampires (1974)Why is Cushing cosplaying as Dr. Who?
PSYCHO II (1983)Two mothers? Two maniacs? It's two much!
STOP ME BEFORE I KILL (1960) This 7-word review written during fugue state.
Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers (1988, dir. Dwight H. Little [you my boy])Does lynch mob better than Halloween Kills.
My Sucky Teen Romance (2011, dir. Emily Hagins)Cute movie directed by 18-year old.
Def By Temptation (1990, dir. James Bond III)One of my favorite discoveries of October.
The Sixth Sense (1999, dir. M. Night Shyamalan)I was wrong. Movie's more than twist.
Halloween Kills (2021, dir. David Gordon Green)Best part's when characters watch The Funhouse.
Sugar Hill (1974)Mobsters murder lover? Murder them with voodoo.
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003)The hook's not for Leatherface. It's Biel.
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning (2006)A prequel, so I sawed that coming.
Texas Chainsaw (2013)So dumb, think it's my favorite cuz.
Lamb (2021)The latest parenting craze, "farm-to-cradle"
Jacob's Ladder (1990)I want a Danny Aiello chiropractor angel.
The Innkeepers (2011)Ghosts almost as scary as aimless 20s.
Suburban Gothic(2014 Dir, Richard Bates Jr)The least "Ricky Bates" Ricky Bates movie.
Initiation (2021, dir. John Berardo)"It's a lot of fun" -- Willem Dafoe
VAMPIRE CIRCUS (1972)All's fun and games until... the Circus!
Child’s Play (1988)Does Mike go to the Asylum too?
TEENAGE EXORCIST (1991) Brinke Stevens. Eddie Deezen. Together at last!
Halloween 5 (1989)Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Goofy cop soundtrack.
Q: The Winged Serpent (1982) Dir. Larry CohenNYC rooftop dining rated highest among pterosaurs.
Final Destination 5 (2011) Dir. Steven Quayle...aaand here comes the wrench and WHAMMY!
You're NextMurdering family is a major red flag.
MULHOLLAND DRIVE (2001):Pre-recorded music still gets me every time.
RETURN OF THE APE MAN (1944)Lugosi and Carradine "rock the scientific world".orDoes open carry apply to a blowtorch?or"Did you kill somebody again?" Bela asks.
Death Screams (1982)Shittiest carnival ever. Part of the charm!
Halloween Kills (David Gordon Green, 2021)Might need to kill the discourse next
Contracted (2013)Me, with every new symptom, "E.R. NOW!"
THE SHINING (1980):Still think it’d be a cool job.
HORROR OF THE BLOOD MONSTERS (1970) I have a new favorite Bad Movie.
THE HAPPENING w/ commentary: All the excitement of one hand Clappenning.
The Visit (2015)I stopped liking rap after this movie
The Manor(2021, Dir Axelle Carolynn)Decent flick ruined by its last scenesor Nice to see Groot working outside Marvel
Sudden Fury 1975One of the more entertaining directorial one-offs.ORCautionary tale not to fuck with Canadians
Disappearance at Clifton Hill 2019All tiger people are shady as hell
EVILSPEAK (1981)Demonic revenge? There’s an app for that!
Halloween KillsEvil dies tonight or possibly by brunch
MONSTER CLUB (1981)Is this club anywhere near Mos Eisley?
Halloween 3: Season of the Witch (1982)Finally - Stacey Nelkin as a murder robot!
This comment has been removed by the author.
A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child (1989)Worse than Jaws glove or invisible karate
Hush (2016)Why hush? Shout, she can't hear you
Frankenhooker (1990)This super crack sure is a blast
The Manor (2021)Welcome to the Blumhouse maintained consistent mediocrity.
Shivers 1975Interesting, High Rise (novel) debuted in 1975.
Can you write a book like that that quickly? The film came out in July
Not at all, but fun to think about
Manhattan Baby 1982Bob: "Punish Me"Fans: Where? When? How?
Slumber Party MassacreDir. Danishka Esterhazy 2021Sisters are doin' it for themselves, kinda
These reviews have been counted for the monthly tally. Please post your reviews on today's thread. Thank you for your cooperation.
'WILLIAM PETER BLATTY'S CINEMATIC UNIVERSE TRILOGY!' (PLUS A COUPLE OF CHEAP KNOCKOFFS)
ReplyDeleteWilliam Friedkin's THE EXORCIST: THE VERSION YOU'VE NEVER SEEN [Blatty's preferred edit] (1973/2000, Blu-ray).
♬ Spiderwalk Spiderwalk
Dammit Friendkin Keep the Shot ♫
OR
'Captain Howdy's' Pazuzu's Facebook/TikTok handle. #DontRemakeThis
William Peter Blatty's THE NINTH CONFIGURATION (1980, TUBI) for the first time. Also streaming on Pluto, IMDB TV, Shudder, etc.
ReplyDeleteAs up-its-own-ass pretentious as "Exorcist's" sincerely disturbing.
OR
Scarier than mental illness? Mustache-less Stacy Keach.
William Peter Blatty's THE EXORCIST III - THEATRICAL CUT (1990, Scream! Factory Blu-ray). Also streaming on TUBI, VUDU, PLEX, Peacock, etc.
ReplyDeleteSay, "The Fly's" my favorite movie too!
OR
Kinderman's too old for this demonic shit.
OR
Rare instance telling, not showing, is scarier.
Jon Boorman's EXORCIST II: THE HERETIC - ORIGINAL THEATRICAL CUT (1977, Scream! Factory Blu-ray). Also streaming on HBO Max.
ReplyDeleteFly Africa's unfriendly skies. Pazuzu's Wings Airlines.
William Girdler's ABBY, aka THE BLAXORCIST (1974, YouTube) for the first time.
ReplyDeletePimp motherfucking priest bitch-slaps whiny demon around!
OR
Challenging hubby's masculinity? Kick in the pants!
The Town That Dreaded Sundown (1976) dir Charles B Pierce
ReplyDeleteLess Friday the 13th, more Dateline NBC.
Malignant, dir James Wan, 2021
ReplyDeleteWell, he will always have her back
VFW (2019)
ReplyDeleteVeterans fight war on drugs.
Excessive Neon.
Fade to Black, dir Vernon Zimmerman, 1980
ReplyDeleteThe ultimate movie love for movie lovers.
Victor Crowely, dir Adam Green, 2017
ReplyDeleteThat's not where you put a phone.
Crawl (2019)
ReplyDeleteFlorida Gators Womens Swim Team's favorite movie.
Darkness Falls (2003, Dir. Jonathan Liebesman)
ReplyDeleteHey dingbats, ever consider renaming the town?!
Lamb (2021)
ReplyDeleteSo, wait....does this mean Torgo pro-created?
THE VOYEURS (2021)
ReplyDeleteFive more plot twists during this sentence.
Halloween Kills (2021)
ReplyDeleteEvil dies Tonight, or takes a nap
or
Evil, Evil, Evil, egg, Evil and Evil
or
Karen! Karen you are in my spot…
The Haunting (1999, dir. Jan de Bont)
ReplyDeleteOwen Wilson says five wows. I counted.
THE PIT AND THE PENDULUM (1961)
ReplyDeleteThey paid the Price for their infidelity
Practical Magic (1998)
ReplyDeleteWould sell soul for that seaside house.
Resident Evil: Afterlife (2010)
ReplyDeleteDir: Paul W.S. Anderson
(Overheard in writer’s room)
“Ok listen…have y’all seen The Matrix?”
Halloween Kills (2021)
ReplyDeleteDir: David Gordon Green
Minnie and Moskowitz Anchor Bay DVD owners?
Halloween Kills (2021)
ReplyDeleteCan sequels make prior installments worse retrospectively?
The Howling (Joe Dante, 1981)
ReplyDeleteHowl of a year for werewolf movies
Taste the Blood of Dracula (1970)
ReplyDeleteAlternately: Dracula Kill! If You Live, Drink!
Halloween II (1981)
ReplyDeleteHospital runs Halloween night with skeleton staff.
The Final Destination (2009) Dir. David Ellis
ReplyDeleteNot one character ever says "Damnit Janet!"
The Victim (2011)
ReplyDeleteYou will not believe where Michael's Biehn!
Gerald’s Game (2017)
ReplyDeleteEven tied up, Gugino still kicks ass!
Dagon(2001). "Squid Game" something quite different in Imboca
ReplyDeleteWILLY'S WONDERLAND (2021)
ReplyDeleteFreddy Fazbear must've hired the laziest lawyers.
The Addams Family (1991)
ReplyDeleteSo horny Danny Steinmann could have directed
Addams Family Values (1993)
ReplyDeleteDo like the first one, but hornier.
They Live (1988)
ReplyDeletePunch! Punch! Punch! Punch! Punch! Punch! Punch!
THE ALPHA INCIDENT (1978)
ReplyDeleteFinally! The true story of the Covid.
Piranha 3D (2010)
ReplyDeleteHow was O'Connell snubbed by the Academy?!
The Town That Dreaded Sundown (1976, dir. Charles B. Pierce)
ReplyDeleteBen Johnson is one of the coolest
The Faculty (1998)
ReplyDeleteFeels made to be a $6.99 PVT
The Exorcist (1973)
ReplyDeleteFriedkin scary is good rival for 2020.
FLESH, TEXAS (2009)
ReplyDeleteJust imagine if John Waters directed this.
Dracula (1979, dir. John Badham)
ReplyDeleteLess scary than Langella's other villain, Nixon.
Halloween Kills (2021)
ReplyDeleteEvil dies tonight or possibly next year
HALLOWEEN III : SEASON ON THE WITCH (1982)
ReplyDeleteDo kids even watch television any more?
Q (1982)
ReplyDeleteAnyone else wonder where is Mr. Q?
The Medium (2021)
ReplyDeleteBest fake documentary I've seen in awhile.
Ritual (2002, Avi Nesher)
ReplyDeleteStill making racist "voodoo" movies in 2002
or
Dr. Frank-N-furter retires to Jamaica, goes straight
It’s Alive (1974)
ReplyDeleteGive babies the right to Due Process!
The Funhouse (1981, dir. Tobe Hooper)
ReplyDeleteAlmost as fun as watching this together
Insidious (2010)
ReplyDeleteOn ‘Further’ inspection Darth Maul has hooves
Deep Red (1975)
ReplyDeleteMonths building that puppet. Totally worth it
Scream 4 (2011)
ReplyDeleteScary movie, or advice for bad golfers.
The Bride of Frankenstein (1935)
ReplyDeleteHeterosexual Life Is A Prison: The Movie
The Legend of the Seven Golden Vampires (1974)
ReplyDeleteWhy is Cushing cosplaying as Dr. Who?
PSYCHO II (1983)
ReplyDeleteTwo mothers? Two maniacs? It's two much!
STOP ME BEFORE I KILL (1960)
ReplyDeleteThis 7-word review written during fugue state.
Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers (1988, dir. Dwight H. Little [you my boy])
ReplyDeleteDoes lynch mob better than Halloween Kills.
My Sucky Teen Romance (2011, dir. Emily Hagins)
ReplyDeleteCute movie directed by 18-year old.
Def By Temptation (1990, dir. James Bond III)
ReplyDeleteOne of my favorite discoveries of October.
The Sixth Sense (1999, dir. M. Night Shyamalan)
ReplyDeleteI was wrong. Movie's more than twist.
Halloween Kills (2021, dir. David Gordon Green)
ReplyDeleteBest part's when characters watch The Funhouse.
Sugar Hill (1974)
ReplyDeleteMobsters murder lover? Murder them with voodoo.
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003)
ReplyDeleteThe hook's not for Leatherface. It's Biel.
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning (2006)
ReplyDeleteA prequel, so I sawed that coming.
Texas Chainsaw (2013)
ReplyDeleteSo dumb, think it's my favorite cuz.
Lamb (2021)
ReplyDeleteThe latest parenting craze, "farm-to-cradle"
Jacob's Ladder (1990)
ReplyDeleteI want a Danny Aiello chiropractor angel.
The Innkeepers (2011)
ReplyDeleteGhosts almost as scary as aimless 20s.
Suburban Gothic(2014 Dir, Richard Bates Jr)
ReplyDeleteThe least "Ricky Bates" Ricky Bates movie.
Initiation (2021, dir. John Berardo)
ReplyDelete"It's a lot of fun" -- Willem Dafoe
VAMPIRE CIRCUS (1972)
ReplyDeleteAll's fun and games until... the Circus!
Child’s Play (1988)
ReplyDeleteDoes Mike go to the Asylum too?
TEENAGE EXORCIST (1991)
ReplyDeleteBrinke Stevens. Eddie Deezen. Together at last!
Halloween 5 (1989)
ReplyDeleteTerrible, Horrible, No Good, Goofy cop soundtrack.
Q: The Winged Serpent (1982) Dir. Larry Cohen
ReplyDeleteNYC rooftop dining rated highest among pterosaurs.
Final Destination 5 (2011) Dir. Steven Quayle
ReplyDelete...aaand here comes the wrench and WHAMMY!
You're Next
ReplyDeleteMurdering family is a major red flag.
MULHOLLAND DRIVE (2001):
ReplyDeletePre-recorded music still gets me every time.
RETURN OF THE APE MAN (1944)
ReplyDeleteLugosi and Carradine "rock the scientific world".
or
Does open carry apply to a blowtorch?
or
"Did you kill somebody again?" Bela asks.
Death Screams (1982)
ReplyDeleteShittiest carnival ever. Part of the charm!
Halloween Kills (David Gordon Green, 2021)
ReplyDeleteMight need to kill the discourse next
Contracted (2013)
ReplyDeleteMe, with every new symptom, "E.R. NOW!"
THE SHINING (1980):
ReplyDeleteStill think it’d be a cool job.
HORROR OF THE BLOOD MONSTERS (1970)
ReplyDeleteI have a new favorite Bad Movie.
THE HAPPENING w/ commentary:
ReplyDeleteAll the excitement of one hand Clappenning.
The Visit (2015)
ReplyDeleteI stopped liking rap after this movie
The Manor(2021, Dir Axelle Carolynn)
ReplyDeleteDecent flick ruined by its last scenes
or
Nice to see Groot working outside Marvel
Sudden Fury 1975
ReplyDeleteOne of the more entertaining directorial one-offs.
OR
Cautionary tale not to fuck with Canadians
Disappearance at Clifton Hill 2019
ReplyDeleteAll tiger people are shady as hell
EVILSPEAK (1981)
ReplyDeleteDemonic revenge? There’s an app for that!
Halloween Kills
ReplyDeleteEvil dies tonight or possibly by brunch
MONSTER CLUB (1981)
ReplyDeleteIs this club anywhere near Mos Eisley?
Halloween 3: Season of the Witch (1982)
ReplyDeleteFinally - Stacey Nelkin as a murder robot!
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteA Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child (1989)
ReplyDeleteWorse than Jaws glove or invisible karate
Hush (2016)
ReplyDeleteWhy hush? Shout, she can't hear you
Frankenhooker (1990)
ReplyDeleteThis super crack sure is a blast
The Manor (2021)
ReplyDeleteWelcome to the Blumhouse maintained consistent mediocrity.
Shivers 1975
ReplyDeleteInteresting, High Rise (novel) debuted in 1975.
Can you write a book like that that quickly? The film came out in July
DeleteNot at all, but fun to think about
DeleteManhattan Baby 1982
ReplyDeleteBob: "Punish Me"
Fans: Where? When? How?
Slumber Party Massacre
ReplyDeleteDir. Danishka Esterhazy 2021
Sisters are doin' it for themselves, kinda
These reviews have been counted for the monthly tally. Please post your reviews on today's thread. Thank you for your cooperation.
ReplyDelete