'SIMPLISTIC REVIEWS' 2021 12-HOUR MARATHON OF "COPYRIGHT-FREE" MOVIES' SEXTUPLETS!'Dario Argento's DEEP RED (1975, YouTube).Giallo's good name dragged across bloody concrete.
DON'T LOOK IN THE BASEMENT (1973, YouTube).Charlotte does just that. Guess what happened?
Dean Stockwell in THE WEREWOLF OF WASHINGTON (1973, YouTube) for the first time."Nixon'll" do anything to distract from Watergate.ORTHIS is how to end a movie.
Willard Huyck and Gloria Katz's MESSIAH OF EVIL (1973, YouTube)."Dead and Buried" with rough edges unsanded.ORUnforgettable supermarket/movie theater scenes. The rest...
George A. Romero's NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD (1968, YouTube).I prefer Barbara's 1990 Sarah Connor-ization makeover.OR53 years later, that ending... MY GOD!
Halloween (2018)"Send Dave first!" Best line, hands down.
F.W. Murnau's NOSFERATU (1922, YouTube).Max Schreck smaller than Christopher Walken. Disappointed.ORToo much lurking/leering, not enough vamping.
Phantom of the I Opera, dir Terence Fisher, 1962One of the sweeter adaptions of Phantom
Titane (2021)On this episode of my strange addiction.
Halloween Kills (2021)Halloween Kills; my enthusiasm for the franchise.
Malignant (2021)Two heads aren’t always better then one.
Mimic, dir Guillermo del Toro, 1997Roaches fold themselves into Mad Magazine issue
Hannibal (2001, Dir. Ridley Scott) Cold IP-Ray pairs well with brains.
Sweeny Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street, dir Tim Burton, 2007Toes give the pies an extra crunchOrSondheim has a whole song about urine
Torture Garden, dir Freddie Francis, 1967Burgess Meredith goes full Penguin, it's wonderful.
Phantom from Space (1953, dir. W. Lee Wilder)Short on budget? Make your monster invisible.
Motel Hell (1980)Dir. Kevin ConnorOne more reason to ditch the meat.
The Hitcher (1986)Dir. Robert HarmonJennifer Jason Leigh doing her stretches wrong
Tourist Trap (1979)Dir. David SchmoellerReason to not always support small businesses.
THE NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS (1993) at the Mahoning Drive-InThe consequences of Jack Skellington's existential crisis.
OrI would love this version of Christmas
THE MAGICIAN (1926)Should hypnotists have their own Hippocratic oath?
Cherry Falls (2000)Gives a new meaning to safe sex.orThis explains so much about Bob Sugar.
Race With the Devil (1975)Dir. Jack StarrettWitches, man … RV there yet? Another drink ...
The Village (2015)I think this girl is Film Twitter.
CHOPPING MALL (1986):She lost her head over those robots.
PSYCHO GOREMAN (2020): He's more of a sociopathic Goreman, really.
Seance (2021) Dir. Simon BarrettI attended an all models school too.
You're Next (2011)Dir. Adam Wingard Masks are cool; better is arrows sound.
Seance (2021)Hey, filing cabinet. I see you there.
V/H/S/94 (2021)Timo Tjahjanto's Robocop 2 remake is delightful.
JUST BEFORE DAWN (1981)Must resist urge to make fisting joke...
SALEM'S LOT (1979)Such hostility toward an elderly antiquing couple.
The Innkeepers(2011) dir. Ti WestTi West realllllllly likes the Gilmore Girls.
EERIE TALES (1919)Devil, Whore, Death: prototypes of Cryptkeeper types?
Hellraiser 3: Soon to be symbiote vs wannabe cenobites.
The Frighteners (1996)*sees a ghost* Don’t stop Wilbur, Drive!
Slaughter High (1986)The best pranks end in permanent disfigurement.
Son of Frankenstein (1939)Basil Rathbone’s master class in dartboard acting.
BEETLEJUICE (1988) Lydia, oh Lydia, have you met Lydia...
Hubie Halloween (2020)Dir: Steven BrillSimultaneously the worst and BEST Halloween movie!
The Fly II (1989)Martin turns into a dinosaur and barfs.
Let the Corpses Tan (2017)Surprisingly, not about zombies picketing tanning salon.
The Cell (2000)Baths not so relaxing for Vincent D'onofrio.
Night of the Living Dead (1990)I like this more with each viewing.
The Mummy (1999, dir. Stephen Somers)Movie peaks with use of tactical cat
Phantasm II (1988)Reggie having the best time being Reggie.
Arachnophobia (1990)Pretty much every 90s movie holds up.
Mad Love (1935)The godfather of toxic fandom? Peter Lorre.
Come to Daddy(2019). The family therapy bills gonna be expensive
Pet Sematary II (1992)“I’ll take Pet Sematary 100x crazier, please!
Scare Package (2020)Ya just know the filmmakers watch movies…
The Fly (1985)He's pretty fly (for a white guy)
KONGA (1961) Killer ape upstaged by Michael Gough's coolness.
Harvey Wienstien Served 2021 Starry eyes Director must of known something
Lesson of the Evil (2012)What if Patrick Bateman was a teacher?
Vampires(1998). It's way more Bloodrayne than Near Dark
Dead and Buried (1981)Perfect double feature with Richard Linklater’s “Bernie”
The Lost Boys (1987)Pretty sure Alex Winter was bleeding glitter.
Drag Me To Hell (2009)Great filmmaking. Could feel old lady’s gums.
Halloween Kills (2021)Michael Myers getting Etsy level kill creative
Leviathan (1989)That’s one way to quit your job.
House of wax(2004 Dir, Jaume Collet-Serra)points subtracted for lacking melting studio logoorIrony? Hellacious camping why Hiltons started hotels
Scanner Cop 1993 Scanner cop scans people, computers, defibrillators, everything!
(from yesterday, Junesploitation horror redux, 90s action horror)
Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1992)1992: slaying Vampires2021: slaying her reputation.
Stigmata (1999)Gabriel walks through fire, does not Byrne.
The Tingler (1959)Forget inner child, it's an inner crustacean!
Cloverfield (2008)Alien takes numerous bites of Big Apple.
The Leopard Man (1943)Wanted more leopards and more leopard men.
Psycho (1960)Norman might benefit greatly from pursuing counseling.
The Haunting (1999)Hard to vaccinate against that flue. Wow
Halloween (1978, dir. John Carpenter)Our kids saw their first movie boobs.
Nurse 3-D (2013)Definitely one of the better slasher outfits.
A Bay of Blood (1971)It's the best ending ever. Bavo Bavo
Gerald's Game (2017)Spending the weekend in bed? So scary!
The FrightenersNow we are killing actors named Jeff?!
"ROUTE 66: LIZARD'S LEG AND OWLET'S WING" (1962)Please make them like they used to.
Halloween Kills(2021) Second viewing as disappointing as the first.
Strait-Jacket (1964)It’s cocktail hour: let’s have room-temperature milk!
No! No! Pepsi, dammit! By the carton!
Dr Black, Mr HydeCharacter’s name neither “Black” nor “Hyde”
The Hands of OrlacThose hands’d be my excuse for everything.
Ghost watchAkin to Wells' War of the Worlds
The Granny (1995)What if a grandma talked like Freddy?
The Scary of Sixty FirstThis is my favorite Jeffrey Epsteinsploitation movie
The FacultyI wish I’d had that much caffeine
TenebreAny way you slice it, it’s perfect
Calvaire Why do Belgians like depicting pig fucking?
Night of the Living Dead (1990)Barbara’s back and she’s a badass bitch
Phantasm 2The Tall Man? Pfft! He wears heels!
ArachnophobiaWho knew arachnophobia was cured so easily!
The Monster Squad(1987). It's the Gooniest of kids horror adventure
I Am a Ghost (annual revisit)Definitive example of excellent low budget filmmaking.
BLOOD RELIC (2005) Did this museum know they were filming?
Halloween (2018) Add Vicky's death with Rachel's as unforgivable
John Carpenter’s VampiresOf course, the Catholic Church is responsible.
Scre4m (2011)I’m with Heather Wixon on this one.
Black Sunday (1960)Being cursed by a witch must suck.
It's Alive (1974)Police start baby manhunt surprising no one.
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Brain (1988) David Gale again auditioning for the head.
Starry Eyes (3rd revisit)Alex Essoe out-acts pretty much everyone.
Ghost Town (1988)Kick ass Western with undead bad guys.
FRANKENWEENIE (2012)Shock to the heart, and you're alive.orIf you don't understand how, google science.
The Ring (2002)This is the perfect rainy day movie.
Arachnophobia (BTW, This movie is awesome)Sands' spiders no match for a Goodman
You'll Find Out 1940What your (Great) Grand Parents thought was funny.
The Return of the Vampire (1943)Looks, but doesn’t act, like a werewolf.
The Black Cat (1934) Was Karloff's wardrobe designed by a Romulan?
Halloween (1978)Annie’s executed for being the WORST babysitter.
A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors (1987)Well he had a tendon to sleepwalk.
Child's Play (1988) - Andy going full LA Confidential on Chucky.
A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: The Dream Master (1988)Teens are all Dramarama about Anything Anything.
A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child (1989)There is definitely some womb for improvement.
Halloween Kills (2021)I hope 'Ends' is about some Witches.
Phantom of the Opera 1925Someone slapped Erik's back, face remained funny!
Single White Female (1992)Don’t care, I’d still room with JJL
The Invisible ManChekhov's switched track train collision
Grizzly 2: Revenge (1983/2020)Was mostly concert footage. Bearly any grizzly.
Ma (2019)If you see Ma, steer clear, OK?
Poltergeist (2015)This was fine. Nothing more. Nothing less.
Maximum Overdrive (1986)Gas prices are ridiculous these days, eh?
The Ruins (2008)"I Heard You Can't Escape Vines"-Mayans
House on Haunted Hill (1959)Want Vincent's money? Better pay the Price
Halloween Kills (2021) Dir. David Gordon GreenFinally confirms Michael did eat a dog.orHaddonfield really needs a gun safety class.
Poltergeist (1982, Dir: Tobe Hooper)Found definitive proof Hooper directed. Watched credits.orI've nothing but love for this movie.
Mansion of Madness 1973Works like Jodorski remade Val Lewton's Bedlam!
Neon Maniacs 1986Nostromo Hat! Mr. Bill Tee! Want these!!!
Hellraiser: Bloodline (1996)It's the Hellraiser: Bloodline of this franchise.
Edge of the Axe (1988)Away Message must always be something horny.
Slumber Party Massacre (1982)Killer shoulda said “drill you marry me?”
The Descent: Part 2 (2009)Hold up... That wasn't decent at all!
These reviews have been counted for the monthly tally. Please post your reviews on today's thread. Thank you for your cooperation.