RIFFTRAX LIVE! [Patty Duke and Jane Wyatt in] AMYTIVILLE 4: THE EVIL ESCAPES (2021/1989, Fathom Events theater) for the first time. [Original Airdate: May 12, 1989, NBC] Movie streaming on TUBI, PLEX, Roku Channel, etc.
Paul Verhoeven's ROBOCOP: EDITED-FOR-TELEVISION VERSION (1987, Blu-ray -Standard Definition-) for the first time. [Original Airdate: Late 80's, Syndication]
"Dipstick" Mr. Kenny "finked," dies like "blaggard."
OR
Murphy's one "bad mothercrusher," "crumbag" "bloodsuckers" pay.
I watched the first two Phantasm films for the first time this year. The difference between the films is very striking. Filmmaking styles changed a lot in a decade.
'AS SEEN ON TV' HIGH FIVE!
ReplyDeleteRIFFTRAX LIVE! [Patty Duke and Jane Wyatt in] AMYTIVILLE 4: THE EVIL ESCAPES (2021/1989, Fathom Events theater) for the first time. [Original Airdate: May 12, 1989, NBC] Movie streaming on TUBI, PLEX, Roku Channel, etc.
Demonic lamp roasts Tweety, shits on plumber.
OR
Makes "Exorcist II" look like "Citizen Kane."
OR
Lesson learned: tomato's my new favorite "fruit."
Can't believe anyone who'd own that lamp
DeleteJohn Carpenter's HALLOWEEN: THE EXTENDED CUT (1978, Shout! Factory Blu-ray -HD with SD inserts-). [Original Airdate: October 30, 1981, NBC]
ReplyDeleteAdditional Pleasence scenes. Finite resource worth appreciating.
OR
Even slumming, Dean Cundey frames gorgeous pictures.
Rick Rosenthal's HALLOWEEN II: THE TELEVISION CUT (1981, Shout! Factory DVD). [Original Airdate: Early 80's, Network/Cable TV]
ReplyDelete♫ Ben Tramer roasting
on an open fire ♬
OR
Unlike theatrical, Loomis actually fires six times.
OR
Neutered violence worth improved pacing, alternate scenes.
Paul Verhoeven's ROBOCOP: EDITED-FOR-TELEVISION VERSION (1987, Blu-ray -Standard Definition-) for the first time. [Original Airdate: Late 80's, Syndication]
ReplyDelete"Dipstick" Mr. Kenny "finked," dies like "blaggard."
OR
Murphy's one "bad mothercrusher," "crumbag" "bloodsuckers" pay.
Sam Raimi's ARMY OF DARKNESS: TELEVISION VERSION (1992, Blu-ray -Standard Definition-) for the first time. [Original Airdate: Early 90's, Syndication]
ReplyDelete85% Director's Cut, 100% Theatrical ending. Winnah!
OR
"Ape heads" can't help Ash dispatch "She-Witch."
World War Z (2013 - Marc Forster)
ReplyDeleteMan, this Pepsi is really something else.
A Cat in the Brain (1990)
ReplyDelete"Figurative title clearly."
*starts movie*
"Oh shit!"
Phantoms (1998, Dir. Joe Chappelle)
ReplyDeleteTagline should have been: "It's a-Liev!!"
Or
That hat is wearing a Ben Affleck.
Wrong Turn (2021)
ReplyDeleteMaster archery in just six upsetting weeks!
Candyman 2021
ReplyDeleteProjector broke midway.
Handyman. Handyman. Handyman. Handyman.........
Candyman 1992
ReplyDeleteI accidentally said Randy Man 5 times.
27. Final Destination (2000)
ReplyDeleteSetups! Setups everywhere!
Final Destination (2000)
DeleteSetups! Setups everywhere! and scary wind gust.
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ReplyDeleteFinal Destination 2 (2003)
ReplyDeleteGreat glasswork. On par with The Omen
Hellraiser 4 Bloodline, 1996
ReplyDeleteCan almost hear Pinhead humming Rihanna's S&M
Or
What's in the box? Lots of Space.
Dawn of the Dead (2004)
ReplyDeleteI miss Sarah Polley staring in movies.
The New York Ripper (1982)
ReplyDeleteTriumphant showcase of that classic NYC accent
The Rental (2020)
ReplyDeleteJust imagine Allison Brie / Dan Stevens babies.
HEREDITARY 2018
ReplyDelete&
MIDSOMMAR 2019
Dir. Ari Aster
"Needs more naked elderly," said nobody ever.
Village of the Damned (1995, dir. John Carpenter)
ReplyDeleteOf course Reeve's kid would have superpowers.
screams of a winter night 1971
ReplyDeleteWatched Tuesday, almost completely forgotten it already
HAPPY DEATH DAY (2017)
ReplyDeleteI swear I've reviewed this movie before...
THE VOID (2016)
ReplyDeleteDoes my health insurance cover tentacle C-section?
House on Haunted Hill (1999)
ReplyDeleteDon’t blink, that Veronica Vaughn is gone
THERE'S SOMEONE INSIDE YOUR HOUSE (2021)
ReplyDeleteSlasher kills you with important social issues.
Blade II (2002)
ReplyDeleteVampire action on VSPN's "Hurty for Spurty"
Friday the 13th Part 2 (1981)
ReplyDeleteStill prefer Jason clumsily falling through chairs.
Hellraiser 3:Hell On Earth (1992)
ReplyDeleteIn 1993 we'd have Beanie Baby Cenobite
Sleepaway Camp (1983)
ReplyDeleteChild molester gets face melted? No complaints.
In The Mouth Of Badness (1994)
ReplyDeleteWhat kind of fucking park is this?
or
Ultimate message of the film...DON'T READ!
or
Never trust anyone looks like Jurgen Prochnow
or
As a Vermonter, never trusted New Hampshire
I am stoopid. In The Mouth Of Madness, not Badness. I love this movie.
Delete🤣😉😇
DeleteThe Devil's Rejects (2005)
ReplyDeleteShit! Fuck! No sign of Kiefer anywhere.
The Devil's Rejects (2005)
ReplyDeleteVariants Patrick and Erika on the road!
KISS OF THE VAMPIRE (1963)
ReplyDeleteLou Diamond Phillips should've saved them all.
HALLOWEEN H20 (1998)
ReplyDeleteIn this one, evil actually dies tonight.
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DeleteHALLOWEEN: RESURRECTION (2002)
Delete...as long as you ignore the sequel.
THE CRAZIES (2010)
ReplyDeleteBoy, Justified sure had a wild start
THE DEAD ZONE (1983)
ReplyDeleteThe origin story of Christopher Walken's hair
Humanoids from the Deep (1980)
ReplyDeleteVic Morrow always turns on the smarm.
Bram Stoker's Dracula (1992)
ReplyDelete"Take me away from this death."
"Well..."
This death that you're the cause of
DeleteHELLRAISER (1987)
ReplyDeleteImagine if Frank was TV’s Frank instead.
Different (though not better) experience. 😼🐷🙊
DeleteThe Boy (2006)
ReplyDeleteSaw it coming, then forgot, ultimately surprised!
3 from Hell (2019)
ReplyDeleteStarting to think the Fireflies enjoy violence.
Phantom of the Megaplex (2000):
ReplyDeleteI think COVID has assumed that mantle.
Feeders 1996
ReplyDeleteNeed an evil doppelganger? Use identical twin!
HELLBOUND: HELLRAISER II (1988)
ReplyDeleteDo you think Cenobites eat at Cinnabon?
Troll 2 (1990, dir. Claudio Fragasso aka Drake Floyd)
ReplyDeleteFound the Goblin Queen for Bowie's King.
The Lords of Salem (2012)
ReplyDeleteHaven't seen? Then don't talk about Zombie.
Childs Play (1988)
ReplyDeleteJames Gagney gets meaner when he's smaller.
The Invisible Man (2020)
ReplyDeleteIncredible CGI! Couldn’t see him at all!
NOBODY SLEEPS IN THE WOODS TONIGHT 2 (2021)
ReplyDeleteGollum’s origin story different than I remembered.
Fade to Black (1980)
ReplyDeleteMovies don't kill people, Cody Jarrett does.
The Special (2020)
ReplyDeleteDir: B. Harrison Smith
SNL skits are getting out of hand.
Phantasm (1979)
ReplyDeleteWhat does this series have against glass?
Phantasm II (1988)
ReplyDeleteThese guys Winchestered before Winchester's ever Winchestered.
I watched the first two Phantasm films for the first time this year. The difference between the films is very striking. Filmmaking styles changed a lot in a decade.
DeleteDeepStar Six (1989)
ReplyDeleteDir: Sean S. Cunningham
Someone should've warned Miguel Ferrer about decompression.
Phantasm III: Lord of the Dead (1994)
ReplyDeleteA mirror...I wonder what will happen?
Cannibal Holocaust (1980)
ReplyDeleteThis season of Survivor is very different.
Wolfcop 2014
ReplyDeleteWolf transformations here are a real pisser!
Night School (1981)
ReplyDeleteFavorite discovery of SMM. Check it out!
Definitely a winner. The scene in the kitchen with the pot being emptied is so suspenseful and humorous.
DeleteNight Teeth (2021) Dir. Adam Randall
ReplyDeleteClever idea, reverse Uber Eats for vampires.
Pet Sematary (1989)
ReplyDeleteOh, my neck, my back, my neck
Killer Workout (1987)
ReplyDeleteI'm just trying to cancel my membership.
cackling
DeleteBook of Shadows:Blair Witch 2(2000) Came down to this or Mirrors...choices
ReplyDeleteMAD MONSTER PARTY? (1967)
ReplyDeleteBehind the scenes of the monster cereals.
The Horror of The Black Museum 1959
ReplyDeleteWhere does Alfred get these wonderful toys?
Halloween 5: Revenge of Michael Myers (1989)
ReplyDeleteWho keeps giving Dr Loomis a gun???
The War of the Worlds 1953
ReplyDeleteAll Welles that ends well shucks
The Return of the Fly 1959
ReplyDeleteBest catch Halsey fly with Devil's Honey
Dracula (Spanish-language version) 1931
ReplyDeleteGeez, Dracula! How about installing a handrail?!
The Fly 2(1989). J Fox replaces Stoltz....wait, wrong movie
ReplyDelete😆😃👍
DeleteINSIDE OUT (1991)
ReplyDeleteOooh, we’re a long way from Pixar.
Prince of Darkness (1987)
ReplyDeleteJameson Parker's mustache should've auditioned for Tombstone.
Killer Klowns from Outer Space (1988)
ReplyDeleteGoofy horror comedies need more police brutality.
SISTERS (1972):
ReplyDeleteMulti-angle movie makes for much more Margot.
CAPTAIN KRONOS: VAMPIRE HUNTER (1974)
ReplyDeleteAs if anybody'd leave Caroline Munro behind.
Victor Crowley (2017)
ReplyDeletePut Laura Ortiz in all the movies.
Eraserhead(1977) This is giving me serious 2020 vibes.
ReplyDeleteThe Burbs(1989, Dir: Joe Dante)
ReplyDeleteHow Suburbanites harassed neighbors before Nextdoor/Facebook
Hellraiser: Hellseeker, dir Rick Both, 2002
ReplyDeleteWhite Collar Crime is Pinhead's new kink
Def by Temptation (James Bond III, 1990)
ReplyDeleteErnest Dickerson makes low budget look cool
Razorback (Russell Mulcahy, 1984)
ReplyDeleteEverything about Australia wants to kill you
Body Bags (1993, dir. John Carpenter & Tobe Hooper)
ReplyDeleteWish Tobe had done some more anthologies.
Tales from the Darkside: The Movie (1990, dir. John Harrison)
ReplyDeleteStars of tomorrow fighting mummies of today.
TerrorVision (1986)
ReplyDeleteBob, Carol, Ted, Alice and Space Dog
The Bride of Frankenstein 1935
ReplyDeleteDumb mob couldn't make evil die either
Deathgasm (2015)
ReplyDeleteMy second power drill guitar this week
Inferno (1980)
ReplyDeleteWish life was lit like this movie.
Strait-Jacket (1964)
ReplyDeleteDir. William Castle
Don’t “axe” Joan Crawford about her past.
GRAVE OF THE VAMPIRE (1972)
ReplyDeleteWhat kind of professor is this Lockwood?
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteGARDEN OF THE DEAD (1972)
ReplyDeleteFast zombies using weapons fifty years ago.
TWO ON A GUILLOTINE (1965)
ReplyDeleteWeird stipulations in wills generally not good.
THE CRIMSON CULT (1968)
ReplyDeleteThis coven has some quirky fashion taste.
THE WITCH'S MIRROR (1962)
ReplyDeleteThe dead sometimes do not go quietly.
Or
What other plots will be borrow from?
"will we borrow from."
DeleteMidnight Mass (2021) dir.Mike Flanagan
ReplyDeleteBetter than anything I’ve seen this month.
Raw
ReplyDeleteOpposite of Titane… 10% interesting 90% wtf
Häxan (1922 - Benjamin Christensen)
ReplyDeleteFanatic Christian monks are scary - also: witches.
These reviews have been counted for the monthly tally. Please post your reviews on today's thread. Thank you for your cooperation.
ReplyDelete