Luis Ospina's PURA SANGRE (PURE BLOOD, 1982, 35mm) at New York City's Anthology Film Archive for the first time.Rich Colombians suck poor people dry, literally!ORLuis Buñuel would approve. Hedonistic, disturbing, funny?
Ti West's PEARL (2022, theater) for the first time.Disturbed girl wants fame? What a 'croc.'ORFinal shot more disturbing than "X" sex.
The Munsters, dir Rob Zombie, 2022Like Zoya, I too own many joints.
Halloween 2, dir Rob Zombie, 2009I am just a puddle of emotion.
Smile (2022. Dir. Parker Finn)Startin' October with a Coke and a ...
Sorority Row (2009) dir. Stewart HendlerImagining Star Wars but Leia packs lead
Die, Monster, Die! (1965, dir. Daniel Haller)Largest item on budget sheet: fog machine.
BREEDER (2020, Dir. Jens Dahl)Not the sweetest Danish I've ever had.
My Best Friend’s Exorcism (2022)Female friendships are stronger than demons. LYLAS!
The Munsters (2022)Made by Rob Zombie, for Rob Zombie…only.
THE MUNSTERS (2022) The Rob Zombie themed restaurant opens when?
The Little Shop of Horrors (1960)Needs less chase scenes and more singing.
THE MUNSTERS (2022):Imagine getting really mad about this movie.
Final Destination (2000)Sawa to bother you but please deboard
Hellraiser: Inferno (2000)Hellraiser: Inferno with special guest star Pinhead!
Final Destination 2 (2003)The cop looks exactly like Rob DiCristino
OMG he does! All that was missing was a sweater-vest!
Final Destination 3 (2006)I guess Kenobi's bride isn't death proof
The Final Destination (2009)Starting to notice these movies are repetitive
THE BLACK PHONE (2021) I would die because I only text.
Final Destination 5 (2011)The final few minutes are pretty rad
EYES OF THE CAT (1969) Gives new meaning to "crazy cat lady."
A Horrible Way to Die (2010)Indie horror folks, being indie horror, folks.
The Exorcist II: The Heretic (1977)Must we add locusts to unnecessary sequels?
The Craft (1996)Perfect line: We are the weirdos, mister.
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The Mummy (1932)Girlfriend: "To be a born again queen..."
The Bride of Frankenstein (1935)Lord Byron is the movie's real star.
Jennifer's Body (2009)"Low Shoulder sells out to a demon."
Munsters (2022): Why all the hate? There’re zero horses. AndDark Glasses (2022): Cat o’Nine Tails remake, Malden now hot.
Mickey's House of Villains (2002)Only kids can understand what Donald says.
Hellraiser: Deader (2005)No tears please, it gets even worse.
Final Destination Franchise9 out of 10 Rube Goldbergs recommend.
CURSE OF THE BLOOD GHOULS (1962) Ladies in Flowing White Gowns: The Movie!
Apostle (2018) Rescue costs and arm and a head.
Smile (2022) Dir. Carter FinnIt's like an algorithm wrote a script.
Hellraiser (1987, dir. Clive Barker)Demons to some, exposition dumps to others.
Halloween 2 (1981)Should have shot Michael seven times, Loomis.
PULSE (2001):Are computers not supposed to do that?
Halloween 3: Season of the WitchNuclear War wouldn't stop Atkins from fucking.
Rumpelstiltskin (1995)Seven words? Could the review be... shorter?
House of Darkness (2022)One of the best Saban Films ever
The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad (1949)Amazing last ten minutes, long first fifty.
The Ring (2002)That horse scene is night mare fuel
BARBARIAN (2022)Landlord and tenant nursed back to Hell.
Darling (2015)Don’t worry, Darling will make you gush
MONSTER FROM THE OCEAN FLOOR (1954) Yes, use every second of diving footage.
Hellbound: Hellraiser II (1988, dir. Tony Randel)Not saying bloody Julia is *not* attractive...
The Return of the Living Dead (1985):Just might be my favorite zombie movie.
Insidious (2010)First 30 minutes is all baby crying.
30 Days Of Night (2007)Much like me, they prefer chilled blood
The Munsters (2022)I'm glad this exists. It's pure id.
The Brides of Dracula (1960)You will believe a bat can fly.
THE VAMPIRE'S GHOST (1945) This movie might not be culturally sensitive.
I Drink Your Blood (Dir. David D Durston 1970)Like a theatre hippies adaption of Cujo!
The Hunger (1983)More Prince Video Set Death Scenes Please
Carnage Park (2016) Desert of 1,000 corpses still has room
AFTER MIDNIGHT (1989)Cell phones existing would erase every segment.
The Blob(1958 Dir: Irvin S. Yeaworth Jr. Russell S. Doughten Jr.(uncredited))Good thing that artic always stays cool. right?or Gore really was the only thing missing.
Jackals (2017) dir. Kevin GreutertI see Pink Polo, I assume asshole
Trilogy of Terror (1975)Chicks is poison, but dolls are worse!
The Lost Boys (1987)Sax man glistens so brightly in 4K!
The Invisible Man (1933)The invisible man does not wear underwear.
NINA FOREVER (2015):Slowly becoming one of my favorite movies.
Amityville 1992: It's About Time (1992)It's about time these actors kick cocaine.
Muppets Haunted Mansion (2021)Sweet and funny enough. Rizzo missing piece.
Dracula (1931)Never eat where your mental patients poop.or"I never drink...winos. I mean, wine!"
Smile (2022, dir. Parker Finn)Even sizzling Bacon couldn’t keep me awake.
Under Wraps 2 (2022)Museums have incredibly lax security these days.
Friday the 13th Part 3 3D (1982)The third dimension is: laundry, snakes, juggling.
Satanic Panic (2019)The last moments of Frank Cushman’s life.
Annabelle (2014)Still waiting for the Disney version...Clarabelle.
Hereditary (2018)Join a cult to succeed: get ahead!
THE EXORCIST (1973)Father Not-Pacino fights against the devil.
Muppets Haunted Mansion (2021)La Cabra is better than Black Phillip.
Cast a Deadly SpellMore hardboiled than Lovecraftian--not a problem
PearlThis movie should have been called "Smile"
Species (1995)One of the best movies ever made??
Halloween (1978)Michael's only 21?! I feel so unaccomplished
Aterrados [Terrified] (2017)Paranormal investigators investigate who banged man’s wife.
THE CREEPING FLESH (1973) Testing mad science while at the pub.
FROM BEYOND THE GRAVE (1974)Joke's on folks buying what Cushing's pushing
THE BLACK CAT (1934)Karloff would have made helluva Bond villain.
Eyes Without A Face (1960 - Georges Franju)Do you fancy my flexible neck scar?
Halloween 4: The Return of Michael MyersI will never understand Brady's sex appeal.
Halloween 5: The Revenge ofWHY DOES THE MASK GET PROGRESSIVELY WORSE?!
The Haunted Palace (Dir. Roger Corman) Price's ancestor Necronomicon-ned his way into Vincent!
Angel Heart (1987)Forget it, Harry. It's voodoo satanist Chinatown.
Crimes of the Future (2022)Wait this isn't a time travel movie?
The Wizard of Gore (1970)It's like Terrifier but not hot garbage
TerrorVision (1986)Makes the WAP video house seem tame
Hocus Pocus 2 (Dir. Anne Fletcher, 2022)Cute, with The Craft themes thrown in
Hocus Pocus 2 (2022)Great. Now I'm sad about a book.
The Blob (1988) Killing off characters like Game of Thrones!
The 13th Child (2002)Shot down the road, it certainly shows.
Creepshow 2 (1987)Wooden head, wooden raft, and wooden acting
Chopping Mall (1986)This mall is now Straight Outta Crampton.
The Hidden (1987 Dir: Jack Sholder)Alien outlaw comes to earth. Fits in
Ticks (1993)Avoid tall grass? Nah, avoid Clint Howard!
Children of the Corn (1984)To be young and of the corn.
Hocus Pocus 2 (2022) Riding my Dyson would make me supersonic.
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