Monday, October 14, 2013

Riske Business: 10 Overrated Horror Movies

by Adam Riske
Here they are! The horror movies everyone but me seems to find value in. F these movies.

In no particular order:
Paranormal Activity – The only real purpose of the Paranormal Activity series is to be scary. I simply don’t find the original scary. At all! It invented that horrible gimmick in ads of showing movie theatre audiences being scared viewed as if you’re SEAL Team Six (Tim from Jurassic Park is like “Cool.. Night vision!”). Paranormal Activity is the type of movie that teenage girls get together to watch so they can turn to each other in the theatre and giggle to each other “OMG! That was so scary!” The lead characters are annoying, which is a big problem when you’re stuck with them. I also never understood why Micah didn’t just leave Katie. They weren’t married. People break up all the time. Sound mean? Then you go be with her. She at least ruined his weekend. That’s unforgivable. They probably met on JDate anyways (I can make that joke. I’m Jewish. It’s O.K.).
Zombieland – I know this is more of a comedy than a horror movie, but whatever. I think it sucks and no one else seems to think that. Zombieland’s problem is that it takes nothing seriously, so it doesn’t work as horror -- like Shaun of the Dead or An American Werewolf in London. It’s too mainstream to be a gore fest and succeed on that level. It’s completely in love with itself, so it’s never funny. It’s just smug. Case in point: that Bill Murray sequence everyone loves so much. It’s funny at first, but then it becomes like the cinematic equivalent of watching someone pat themselves on the back for five minutes. I will say this: Woody Harrelson is good because he’s incapable of giving a bad performance. He even tries in Money Train, you guys! That’s an actor. Directed by Ruben Fleischer, who has yet to make a good movie.
Nosferatu (1922) – Sorry, JB. I think this movie is real damn boring. Like, terminally boring. Do I appreciate Nosferatu? Yes and no. I agree that Max Schreck is doing something creepy and interesting and the character design/selected imagery are excellent. But isn’t that what they say about Lon Chaney and London After Midnight even though many say that movie (supposedly) isn’t very good? I feel this is a case where something has some cool shots and is old so someone decided one day that it was a “classic.” In full disclosure, I have issues with Silent Horror (exceptions are Lon Chaney’s The Unknown and The Phantom of the Opera). I always want to like them but after 10 minutes I sink in my seat waiting out the antiquated production to conclude.
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 – Sorry, Patrick. If someone gave me money to make a movie but told me that it has to look and feel like “barf,” this is what I would deliver to them. I found the experience of watching this movie to be indescribably oppressive. I have only seen Tobe Hooper’s original once, but that is because it is the scariest movie I have ever seen in my life. It kept me up the entire night after I watched it. The sequel, on the other hand, left me so aggravated and disgusted that I went outside and had a cigarette to put a better taste in my mouth. I don’t even smoke. Whatever the movie is trying to do or even succeeds at is cancelled out for me by what an utterly depressing experience it is to watch.
Friday the 13th – This could go for the entire series, but I’ll stick to the original. It’s not good. The Burning does everything Friday the 13th sets out to do, but better. It even has a cool slasher villain in Cropsy, whereas Friday the 13th had Jason’s mom. But Friday the 13th got there first (in the "camp slasher" subgenre) so it gets all the credit and prestige. I love how over the years the original has somehow become the “classy” one. Genre die-hards will acknowledge that some of the later Friday sequels are more successful, but every repertory theatre books the original Friday the 13th like it’s an example of classic horror cinema. What bullshit.
Fulci – I couldn’t narrow it down to just one, so I’ll say every Fulci movie. They’re all hateful, boring and poorly made. The closest one that comes to being good is The Beyond, and that’s just because it feels the least like a Fulci movie and more like Phantasm or Hellraiser -- which are not great shakes but are at least watchable. The closest I can come to giving Fulci movies props are for the photography and the music, but Dario Argento and Mario Bava do those even better. I can’t stand 95% of Italian Horror. It’s the worst.
The Omen – My issue with The Omen (which I just watched for the first time this month) is that it is complete trash but still acts like it’s not. This is the type of horror movie that non-fans watch because it looks like a thriller. Then they try to convince you it’s good and clearly have no idea what they’re talking about. This movie is just as sleazy as some of the other movies on this list but because Gregory Peck is in it, it's all good? I don’t like the way this movie looks. I don’t like the evil child conceit. I hate the over-reliance on religion in an attempt to make the material more substantial than it is (I’m fine with religion in horror if there’s a point to make, like in Carrie or The Exorcist). The Omen blows.
The Ring – My main issue with The Ring is that people vaulted it to modern classic status. It’s not a bad movie, but it’s a movie that only works once. The Sixth Sense still works after you know the twist because you can watch it as a drama with suspense elements. The Ring doesn’t work as anything other than a cheap mystery; once you get what’s going on, there’s nothing there for you to think about. The Ring has no lasting effect. How could it be a classic? And that kid playing Naomi Watts’ son is so unpleasant. Ugh.
Alien – I’ve never warmed up to the original Alien. It’s a haunted house movie with a great set and a landmark monster. That’s all. The problem with that is that you hardly see any of the monster, so you’re left with enormous chunks of the movie with only boring characters. People give all kinds of credit to Alien for having blue-collar workers in space, but who gives a shit about their shares? I don’t. It’s uninteresting nonsense dialogue posing as character development. The payoffs of the scare sequences are too quick, so the buildup to them is mind-numbingly boring. It’s the horror movie equivalent of watching Bill Cosby do stand-up. You wait 35 minutes listening to a build to get to a punch line that’s decent but nothing great.

I think my big problem with Alien is I got there too late. I was born after this movie came out, so I saw its big moments in clip shows long before I saw them in the context of the movie when I was 11. But like The Ring, it only exists as a scare show. As a counterpoint, I saw all of the big scares from The Exorcist long before I saw that movie in its entirety, but The Exorcist still has scary IDEAS and works, again, as a drama – it’s about Father Karras’ faith as much as anything with Regan. Alien doesn’t have that, which makes it a far inferior movie. It also is not nearly as good as Aliens, which also makes it a far inferior movie. Aliens knows that a BUNCH of aliens coming at you in HIGH VELOCITY is scarier than ONE coming at you SLOWLY. It’s so slow that you forget why you’re fucking there. Hell, Mother (aka the voice of the ship) is scarier to me than the damn Alien.
The Cabin in the Woods – The other ones are unranked. This one is not. The Cabin in the Woods is the most overrated horror movie I’ve ever seen. Hate is a strong word. I come very close to hating The Cabin in the Woods. Here’s why.

1) It’s supposed to be a movie about how we watch horror movies. I don’t identify with that at all. I don’t watch horror movies to smirk at them like Joss Whedon and Drew Goddard do.

2) Whedon and Goddard are trying to make a point that the genre is broken. Well guess what fuckfaces, you’ve never made a good horror movie yourselves so you CAN’T TALK! Wes Craven can make fun of horror conventions in Scream because he’s made a lot of good horror movies! Without that, you are the peanut gallery. Shut up and make a good horror movie and then you have the right to talk shit about the genre on film. Stick to infantilizing America with superheroes or C-grade Star Trek knockoffs and “empowering” women by finding a new way to sexualize them to nerds.

3) They are lampooning things that have been out of fashion for years. For example, there’s a scene near the end with cubes of monsters and a Pinhead-look alike is one. Really, Pinhead? How is that relevant to modern horror? If the point is “let’s take the dry erase board, throw it out and come up with new ideas,” then isn’t Joss Whedon about the last person who should be saying that? His entire career is a regurgitation of media he’s consumed and tweaked with sarcasm with nothing original to say.

4) This movie is so fucking in love with itself. I knew I was in for a bad time from the “I learned it from you!” joke at the beginning. Get it? We’re making fun of an '80s anti-drug ad. Aren’t we cool hipsters? And that brings me to another point. At least that fucking anti-drug ad is sincere. There is not one ounce of sincerity in The Cabin in the Woods.

Finally, 5) It makes the stoner the hero/smartest guy in the room. I’m so tired of this trope. Pot isn’t the worst thing in the world, but it’s not something we should celebrate either. Especially when it portrays stoners as these little fucking gnome twerps like Fran Kranz’s character, Marty. We need less of those people in movies.

People love this movie. Horror fans whose opinions I value and respect love this movie. I don’t get why they don’t feel like it’s a movie that takes a crap on their fandom and stands proudly while it has nothing new to bring to the party.

So, there’s my list. Where am I right? Where am I wrong? What horror movies do you think are overrated?

67 comments:

  1. This list leaves me wondering if you even like horror movies... but seriously, have you seen the Kino restoration of Nosferatu? That makes that movie a lot easier to watch. Clearly, you are on to something with Friday the 13th... but the others... Patrick? Doug? Heath? Should we stage an intervention... or an exorcism?

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    1. I have a lot to say. I will wait for others to weigh in first.

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    2. Intervention or exorcism, will you make sure to record it?

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  2. I have often said that I hate Audrey Hepburn so much that she ruined a film for me that she wasn't even in. And that film is ROSEMARY'S BABY. I am a big Woody Allen fan and have therefore seen Mia Farrow, and more to the point, heard her voice a lot. And in ROSEMARY'S BABY she spends the entire picture doing this clipped, phony, twee Atlantic Standard accent that makes her sound exactly like Audrey Hepburn. And it cuts through me like a weed eater every time she opens her mouth. I can't get past it, and it sank the whole film for me.

    I dislike Audrey Hepburn so much, you see, she ruined a movie that she wasn't even in.

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    1. Rosemary's Baby is one of my all-time favorites, but I totally get what you're saying about her clipped delivery, it really is odd and I can see how it would be off-putting. I never made the Audrey Hepburn connection, though. I'm planning to re-watch it during Scary Movie Month so I'll keep that in mind.

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  3. I don't mind. These are just my opinions. Tell me why you disagree.

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  4. I love horror movies as much as the next guy but I do have to admit that most horror movies are overrated. Mainly because most horror movies just aren't very good as a whole and most are not scary anymore. It kinda relates to JB's "chasing of the dragon." I don't even remember the last horror movie I watched that was actually scary. I mean that is the whole purpose of a horror movie isn't it? Then to make matters worse, the production quality of most horror movies suck.

    I think that's why I enjoy The Shining so much, because as a film, not just a horror movie, it's a masterpiece. It trumps every other horror movie in every aspect of filmmaking...and it's scary.

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  5. The thing I take biggest issue with in your entire article is that Aliens is better than Alien. You monster.

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  6. I think the biggest thing you're going to take shit for here is ripping on Alien. It's kind of a masterpiece. Furthermore, it's been a little while, but I'm pretty sure I still enjoy Zombieland. However, to each his own.

    I certainly agree with Friday the 13th (but even with that, I have residual affection for the series as a whole since they were among the earliest horror movies I remember watching). There are certainly other and better movies that do what it does with greater degrees of success. I'll even side with you on Paranormal Activity. I'm not a huge fan of that movie at all.

    Finally, I take pride in never having seen a single Italian horror movie, because from everything I hear, especially on this site, they are the worst.

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  7. Adam, I feel that this list is of movies that failed to scare you. In a way, I agree:

    I wouldn't ever call Cabin in the Woods or Zombieland "horror movies". They allude and borrow to the genre, but that's about it. The movie are, in essence, self-referential material: a "meta-commentary", if you will. I enjoyed the movies, mostly for the humor, but I agree that they feel like a horror almanac/museum. They are derivative of the genres to which they allude, nothing more... nothing less. I think that if the movie doesn't take itself seriously, why should the spectator? These are essentially parodies. That being said, I think "Tucker & Dale vs Evil" does a better job at being a parody than either one of these movies.

    I disagree with Alien. Given that the movie happened amid the epic sci-fi fever brought about by Star Wars, I think Ridley Scott realized movies of such ilk were just B-Movies with bigger budgets. So, I see Alien as a very well-made, visceral B-Movie. Alien, like any good horror film, is about fear: of the unknown, of isolation, technology, death and mortality. The movie is not the "best lit", and suffers from being constantly "in the dark". I think that was primarily a cost-saving measure. From a production design point of view, the movie is revolutionary, and it introduced a nameless being into the sci-fi horror genre that continues to be a mystery. I agree that Aliens is more entertaining, but Scott laid down a very sound template.

    The Omen, I agree, is overrated. Like Alien, it was the product of its time. Fear and paranoia regarding the Occult and Satanism were very much en vogue in the 1970's, and I see this pseudo-religious/apocalyptic movie as just continuing that trend. This is simply outdated fear.

    My two cents.

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  8. The Burning is better than Friday the 13th because of WHO the killer is - not because the latter cheated on the reveal (pretend the waitress in the diner Mrs. Voorhees - don't even have to change the script). At least, Mrs. Voorhees' rage had focus. Cropsy doesn't even target the guy who was part of the accident...that guy comes after him in the end!

    Alien is bad because you only see glimpses of the monster and the people are boring?

    The religion in The Omen is overdone (forget Patrick Troughton and David Warner's contributions) but The Exorcist is brilliant? There were no questions about faith in The Omen?

    Nosferatu is boring because of the pacing?

    You're thinking all of that would be fine - wrong, but fine - except you end it all with "Joss Whedon can go fuck himself", which I agree with wholeheartedly.

    So now I'm wondering if I have to re-think that, dammit!

    :-p

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  9. @John Murphy - I don't mind taking sh*t about Alien because I have felt that way for as long as I can remember. I'm glad people like it.

    The list is about me wanting to throw these opinions out there to see if anyone agrees or to get a reaction to my thoughts, not to tell people they are wrong for liking these movies.

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  10. I'm with Erich...Alien is a masterpiece. I was 4 when it came out so I also had the surprises spoiled by clips and parodies before I ever saw it but that didn't diminish the effect of the movie in the slightest.

    As for Whedon & Goddard not being able to poke fun at horror tropes because they haven't made a horror movie before...wha-huh? Does that mean first-time directors who made astounding horror movies are less legitimate than people who have been making horror throughout their careers? I'm not following the logic there.

    I'm sure there's more but my phone won't allow me to scroll back to the article so I'll be back, but those are the two that shocked me more than Craven or Carpenter ever have.

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  11. @JP - Regarding Cabin in the Woods, I'm not saying a first time horror director's output is any less legit than a more tenured director. What I'm saying is, if it's your first horror movie, don't make a horror movie that primarily makes fun of other horror movies. I can't think of any other filmmakers that have done what they did.

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  12. @JP - You're right. But I'd debate that Edgar Wright made a great horror movie with Shaun of the Dead and Whedon-Goddard did not with Cabin in the Woods. Shaun is like Scream in the sense that it is a great comment on the thing while still being really good at being the thing.

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    1. The thing about that is so is Cabin in the Woods!

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    2. We just don't feel the same way about CITW I guess. And that's ALL GOOD. Neither of us is right or wrong.

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  13. @Adam

    Have you seen the original Japanese version of the Ring? It's pretty superior to the american remake,.

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  14. @ Tom Smail

    I did but it was a long time ago. It's good but I don't remember much about it.

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  15. I'll back you up Adam. While I do think that Alien is a great movie, I've always caught tons of flack from people because I prefer Aliens. I also despise Friday the 13th and will be taking my first stab at the Omen this week.

    The golden calf of horror movies that I just don't understand is The Birds. I think that it's half of a good movie. While the second hour of the film is masterfully crafted and very intense, I've never been able to sit through the first hour without squirming in my seat from pure boredom. I respect movies that slowly build up (Psycho is my favorite horror film ever), but all this business about Tippi tracking down her crush and rambling around Bodega Bay puts me to sleep just writing about it. I'd love for some F Heads to tell me why I'm wrong, but every review I've read cites the film as a masterpiece because of all the bird stuff. Do they realize that there's 50 minutes before all of that?

    If that didn't enrage everybody, I'm also not the biggest fan of Evil Dead 2. While it's a fun time, I've always been more drawn to the sincerity of the first film, and Evil Dead 2 rewrites over that entire movie in the first ten minutes. The humor only works for me in three scenes, the rest of the time I wish it was a more straightforward horror film like the first one.

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  16. All due respect to one of my favorite film guys, I'm gonna be that guy and say I'm not a fan of "overrated" lists. I can't fault any of your picks because it's your opinion, but I hope you follow this with a list of "underrated" picks. I'm much more interested in reading about movies I should watch than movies someone hates. It's almost as bad as a commenter who brings the discussion to a screeching halt.

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    1. I did intend to write an underrated column for next week. Sorry you didn't care for the overrated column. I think it's fair to express my opinions and see what the feedback is. I wasn't trying to say anyone is wrong for liking movies that I don't personally like.

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    2. I know you weren't taking shots at anyone. My comment wasn't aimed at this list as much as the overall idea of overrated lists. There just isn't much to discuss. You either agree or disagree. No one's going to have their minds changed.

      You're not the only person I know who had that reaction to Cabin in the Woods. I don't get it because I found the movie affectionate, not snarky. Alien is a classic, but I can see how it might leave you cold. The Paranormal Activity movies are at best diminishing returns. I have no lasting love for Friday the 13th or Zombieland so swing away. I'll still respect you in the morning.

      Whatever my feelings about overrated lists, I enjoyed reading yours, as I do all your columns. I just prefer upbeat Adam to vitriolic Adam.

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  17. Adam you are a bold man! Yeah, I'll actually give you most of these except I'm a die hard Fulci fan. I love his atmosphere but I can totally understand he's not for everyone. The only "unforgivable" film on your list is ALIEN. ALIEN is superior to ALIENS (which I like a lot). ALIEN, like JAWS, is all about the tension built from the unseen monster. I also love the intimacy and simplicity of the story. I don't know, I never tire of watching that movie. I hope I didn't repeat anything from above. I did not read all of the replies which I'll do now...

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    1. Thanks for commenting Kyle. I'm glad you like Alien. I don't. That's not unforgivable because there's nothing to forgive.

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    2. You're welcome Adam. That's why I put unforgivable in quotes as I agree there's nothing to forgive. I'm sure I dislike plenty of films you love. One thing we can agree on I think is that we are passionate and have opinions because we love the horror genre and want those types of films to be great! And that Jocelin Donahue is awesome.

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  18. I take it you're not the biggest Whedon fan, huh, Adam?

    I feel Whedon and Goddard aren't smirking but like "Scream" are acknowledging how silly and clichéd horror films have become while still working as a horror movie. Adam, obviously you think that it didn't work at all, but I didn't feel crapped on. What you call "lampooning", I call showing the history of horror. I got a kick out of all the movie monsters referenced.

    Adam, I applause you for sticking to your guns, no matter how many friends you'll lose because of this article. Just kidding!

    Thanks for pointing out how overrated "The Ring" is!

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    1. Thanks Shannon. I wasn't trying to go out of my way to be contrary. Like everyone, I feel like it's good to stick to your guns and risk being unpopular in your opinions sometimes.

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  19. My goodness, there is A LOT to say.

    While this may be your opinion, Adam, you must have known that putting together this list with these particular titles would make you public enemy #1 to many of the horror fans on the web.

    There are very few "good" horror films and this list contains (at least) one film most of us would consider a classic of the genre.

    Frankly, this is the type of article I'm used to seeing on Cracked and not F This Movie.

    Again, completely fine if you feel this way about these films (since taste is one of the most debated, yet subjective things out there), but to come out boldly and declare that these films should be on the list of the "Overrated" would make Woody Allen in Manhattan go Bananas. See what I did there? ;)

    Horror films rarely horrify or scare anyone, unless you are actually afraid of such things.

    For instance, my wife is not afraid of anything supernatural so any film dealing with ghosts/spirits/demons does nothing to her.

    The film, Open Water, scared me, not because of anything in particular, but because the feeling of floating alone for 90 minutes brought out the sweat.

    So I'm going to go through your list and explain why many of these titles deserve not to be there...

    1. Paranormal Activity... Regardless of your feeling on ghosts, the reason why this film is effective (even though Mark Kermode calls it Parasnormal Activity) is because there is a scare factor of not being entirely sure of the person you've moved in with. What baggage he or she might have brought with them. Discovering they have insomnia and then spending their awake time watching you sleep is a little freaky too. I feel this film, the first one, works on multiple layers.

    2. Zombieland... the only zombie film where the four main leads have all been nominated for an Oscar and actually survive the film intact. This film was written to be the pilot episode of a tv series, which is why they actually all survive and play off each other like an ensemble. I find this film fun and energetic, having joy with the genre instead of doing the obvious. Truffaut once said that film should be about the joy of filmmaking or the agony of filmmaking. Watching the director of this film play in the sandbox for 90 minutes is something that brought a lot of joy to many people who sat down thinking they were going to see a generic zombie film.

    3. Nosferatu... the vampire film that started it all. It's important to look at this film in the context of when it was made. Many films once declared scary no longer is. I would say that Tod Browning's Dracula is a film that no longer scares many people, but it's still effective in invoking a mood.

    4. Texas Chainsaw 2... this is a film that one needs to see more than once to catch everything and feel what Hooper was going for. Yes, sure you can know it by one's first viewing, but you don't "know" it until it sinks in. I find that Romero's Dawn of the Dead works the same way. It may take a few times, but once you get it, you know why Hooper went in this direction and didn't look back. Plus, the film was written by the man who wrote Paris, Texas!

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    1. I disagree when people say there are very few good horror movies. I think there are a lot. And isn't OK to say that some classics are ones you don't get the appeal?

      Regarding the individual picks- I have seen TCM2 several times. I've given it a few chances. It just makes me feel bad in a way that I don't gain any artistic value from.

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  20. 5. Friday the 13th... Might not be your cup of tea, but one certainly has to respect it's contribution to the slasher genre. As Joe Bob Briggs said, "May 13, 1980 is the day red meat came back into the American's diet."

    6. Fulci, not really a fan of his films... I really like some of Argento's work though... but Italian horror is funny. The films are either flat out masterpieces or complete garbage. Rarely will you walk out of one and say, "It was... okay." I understand the hatred of Fulci on this site since he is so random and his films have severe pacing problems, but since most new horror fans have never heard of him, I wouldn't say he is overrated.

    7. The Omen... one of the first really scary films I saw. Back in the mid 80s, TV stations would play horror film series either on consecutive nights or each Saturday night. I saw The Omen on a Tuesday night in 5th grade, followed by the sequels on Wednesday and Thursday. It may not be as intellectual as The Exorcist, but it does evoke a feeling of dread, terror. Forget the devil aspect, the way Billie Whitelaw hovers over the film with the dog is terrifying, not to mention the hanging scene. The score is so bombastic, yet it works because it keeps driving it into you that we are experiencing the end of times. Even if you were not religious, it made many go the Bible and look up the quote at the end. Plus, any film that has three giraffes turning and running away from the camera in widescreen and an army of baboons attacking a mother and child is enough to send shivers.

    8. The Ring... not great, but not terrible either. I think the last 10 minutes is what makes the film scary in many people's eyes and as we've said many times, "One can have a bad movie but a great ending and all is forgiven".

    9. Alien... I saw Aliens first when it came out and I really liked it. Then when I saw Alien, I was disappointed. Too long to get to the alien and then there was only one! However, as one gets older, one begins to enjoy how Ridley Scott built that first act into one of the most intriguing and naturalistic of all science fiction. I love the first two films in this series, but for different reasons. Ridley Scott, like Polanski, is an acquired taste in film. The older one gets though, the better those films age.

    10. Cabin in the Woods... One thing that no one ever brings up is how this film is a semi remake of Buffy season 4. And Whedon did make a legit horror film. Watch "Hush" from Buffy season 4. Pretty extraordinary use of silent cinema, humor, scares and imagery. Cabin in the Woods was never a film that was meant to scare people, but it was a call to arms after a decade of remakes, reboots, sequels, found footage films to make something new again and move forward.

    In the immortal words of Herzog, "Cinema is constantly in need of new images."

    It's great to have opinions on anything, but know that being bold and divisive and publicly declaring 10 films that most consider good to great will make most of us question your angle on any article/podcast you do in the future... and that's not F This Movie.

    That's hipsterish internet writing and you are better than that.

    This site is better than that.

    What J.B. wrote as the first comment is correct. I don't think you like horror movies, and that's okay. But try not to become THAT guy on the site that angers everyone, just because your articles are published on here.

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    1. I loved reading your defenses of those movies - they are both elegant and eloquent, very nice job - but I would disagree that the column is somehow beneath the site. Out of context perhaps, and I suppose if this were the only article someone read here it might give the wrong impression, but I take Adam's thoughts on these "overrated" (to him) movies in the spirit in which I'm sure they're intended - all in good fun and winkingly provocative (but not insincere). This is not the kind of site where anyone is made to feel judged or stupid for loving (or not loving) anything - so even if it might appear that Adam is poking us with a stick, I know it's to tickle us not to hurt us.

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    2. That being said, if Adam listed these films individually in a column like J.B.'s Sh**ing on the Classics, I would be right there with you.

      Each film could be discussed thoroughly and within context.

      Having them all lumped together in one big article around Halloween makes Adam look like the new guy who still feels he has something to prove by purposely trying to tick every horror fan on this site off... and to what end?

      The people who like any of these films (which is almost every horror fan) would like to be referred to great horror films we haven't seen for the holiday season--not be told that the films we love are crap just so that Adam can start a hot topic of discussion.

      He certainly started a discussion, and to each his own what they think, but one has to prepared to take a little heat when they come out swinging.

      I love when Patrick or J.B. writes an article that I agree, or disagree, with. It lets me know where I stand with a selected title.

      But one thing this website has always had is tact.

      This article reads like it was purposely written to be a spit in the face and then after we're covered in saliva, the writer asks us, "What do you think?"

      What I think is I'm now covered in your spit, thank you very much...

      Hate any of these films, I don't care, but write constructively and not in a "What now?" attitude.

      This form of arrogance is everywhere on the internet and it turns me off.

      Adam on the podcasts has been funny, insightful and I've enjoyed many of his articles.

      This one, I feel, came across just too ugly and mean spirited and just rubbed me the wrong way.

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    3. Hi Cameron.

      Thank you for expressing how you feel. I hope you keep reading. I promise to show more tact but I'll not do that at the detriment of censoring my opinions. If this column is guilty of anything it's maybe too rant-heavy. Like what you like and I'll do the same because at the end of the day we all love movies (even if you don't believe me anymore :-)

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    4. Tone is everything, my friend.

      You could say the same things in a different way and it would come across less angry and more insightful perhaps.

      Delete
    5. Cool, I'm still your friend. Do you like my other columns? If so, just see this as a mulligan. Even Taylor Swift has a shitty song every once in a while.

      Delete
    6. I do. I wrote this earlier, "Adam on the podcasts has been funny, insightful and I've enjoyed many of his articles.

      This one, I feel, came across just too ugly and mean spirited and just rubbed me the wrong way."

      If you're comparing this article to a Taylor Swift song, then I'd hate to meet the ex that inspired you to write this piece.

      Delete
    7. Well, it's about my bedtime so I'll just leave it at thank you again for passionately defending your point of view. I really respect that even though we disagreed.

      And yes, I am very wrathful to my ex's. Especially Sue Ellen Moffat. She broke my heart.

      Delete
    8. That's okay. Mary Jane Rottencrotch was waiting in the wings. :)

      Delete
  21. Some of these I agree with, other I really dont, I might chime in later with some thoughts, but I just wanted to say that after reading this article I now picture Adam standing in the middle of the internet movie playground with a baseball bat slung over his shoulder staring down the hoards of fans and critics saying "Yeah, I said it. Come at me!"

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    1. It's been an awesome day! Just kidding. It's been decent.

      Delete
  22. Not gonna address all the movies. Haven't seen 'em all. Your opinion, it's cool.

    But dear God in heaven, couldn't agree more with you regarding Cabin in the Woods. SO much hype, and I was left with, "...uh, is this what all the hoopla was about?"

    And to the point of people pointing to Craven, he has made some horrible ass movies *cough* Swamp Thing.

    All this should be taken with a grain of salt, as I'm THAT guy, who thinks Alien 3 is severely underrated. Speaking of which, I second a follow-up with Underrated.

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    1. Alien 3 may be an interesting film, but any movie that idiotically kills Newt and Hicks before the beginning titles end, will always be kept at the bottom of the barrel.

      Swamp Thing was a favorite for many kids back in 1980, mostly because it aired repeatedly on HBO and Cinemax when those channels first came out.

      Wes Craven has made worse films than that, I assure you.

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    2. Newt & Hicks were not that interesting in the first place.

      And yes, I realize he's made worse.

      As the Great Erich has said, we're all entitled to our wrong opinions.

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  23. I must admit, I stand with you on Paranormal Activity. I try to choose the movies I go to see in the theaters carefully, but without a doubt Paranormal Activity was the biggest waste of time and money and the most boring movie theater experience I've ever had.

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  24. Okay, what the fuck is going on here? Jesus, even reading the COMMENTS makes me want to never come back here, which I realize is a knee-jerk reaction, but I didn't get the memo that hating things is just as much fun these days as loving things, so I might be out of place on the internet.

    But "very few *good* horror movies"? I have no words.

    Som people don't get Cabin, and I can deal with that. Adam, I'm sorry, but it obviously went over your head. If it didn't, you wouldn't be claiming it's trying to say the genre is broken (for the record, it isn't). Cabin will always be misunderstood by a certain segment of viewers; it's unfortunate but that's how it is.

    Never seen The Omen? Okay; everybody's got filmic gaps. But to immediately throw it into an Overrated list...sigh.

    Also, you should know: if you write an article about overrated horror movies and include Alien, you run the risk of NOBODY taking you seriously ever again, and/or looking (at the best) misguided. Trust me; I guarantee you it's already happened.

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    1. Hi Albert.

      Just my opinions. I wouldn't take it out on the entire site or the other readers commenting. I completely respect that you don't agree and strongly object to my comments and I expected some blowback. If you don't want to read my writing any more then I'm not making you. If you don't find my opinions credible, that's fine.

      If you think I missed the point on Cabin in the Woods, cool. I want to know what you think I missed. Honestly I do. I would be interested in that discussion.

      Let other people decide if they want to take me seriously ever again. You don't speak for everyone even if you guarantee it.

      Delete
    2. Hey! You shouldn't take Jesus's name in vain - he's one of our greatest Vampire Hunters.

      Delete
    3. But he is responsible for one of the first Zombie apocalypses, then became a zombie himself. So, do you like zombies, Sol? Do you want to be a zombie, Sol? Do you want all of us to become a mindless undead zombie hoard that feasts on the brains of our loved ones without a care for their pain and suffering or showing any sign of remorse, Sol? Well...do ya? Because that is EXACTLY what it sounds like you are saying.

      Delete
    4. I love this site. I really do. I just don't understand the need to foster negativity.

      Your opinions are your own and they are not invalid. But the article reads like you are actively trying to piss people off; were there such a thing as action movie month and somebody posted a list of Overrated Action that included Die Hard or The Matrix, it'd be about the same..what's the point? WHY even do it? It's how you honestly feel, I get that even if I disagree, but what positives come from it? Finding a like-minded person who says "oh, I can't stand that movie either!" doesn't seem worth the trouble. You have to know it's going to hurt more than help. And isnt there enough of that on the internet, you gotta do it here, too? In OCTOBER?

      Inspiring discussion is one thing. This seems like the kind of crap somebody like Armond White would pull, and I think you are better than that.

      Bottom line is that I don't want or need the world to agree with me on everything, but I wouldn't write a Halloween aeticle that essentially shit on numerous movies I would know are many, many peoples' favorites just to get my opinion out there.

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    5. Point taken. I hope you continue reading. I've got a bunch of positive columns to balance out this one!

      You know you go too far if you're being compared to Armond White :-)

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    6. Not to get in the middle of this (he says as he steps right in the middle of it), but if I could make a suggestion to you Albert to start a discussion about the points Adam made in the article as to why you disagree with him. I know its difficult with there being so many controversial points in his article, but if its intelligent and positive discussion that you want (and you are preaching to the choir here, Im sure) then use Adam's points as a jumping off point in that direction rather than focusing on the messenger. I can guarantee you your comments would be well received and positively engaged with.

      This isn't THAT internet, this is a series of tubes.

      Delete
    7. Brad - clearly there is room for two (and ONLY two) interpretations of the life of Jesus Christ: Vampire Hunter or Father of All Zombies. I've chosen my side - if you want to be on the side that tacitly endorses the molestation of children, that's YOUR business, pal.

      Delete
  25. Im loving this post more and more each day.

    I was going to chime in with some thoughts, but Im finding spectating much more enjoyable (in short. agree on Aliens being better/more enjoyable than Alien, agree on TCM2 being barf [sorry Patrick], disagree in your interpretation and conclusion of Cabin, love that you said it ALL). but now I kinda have chimed in, oh well, the point of this comment was to say:

    Yeaaaah, OPINIONS!

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  26. I disagree with some of your list, but that's ok. You write very much like you speak on the show, and because of that, I could hear you saying these things as I read it. Hilarious! Thank you

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    1. Sonny, you've brightened up my evening. High five! Yeah!

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  27. "It invented that horrible gimmick in ads of showing movie theatre audiences being scared"

    This gimmick existed long before Paranormal Activity.

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