Friday, November 8, 2013

Watchin' Trailerz with Doug (Nov. 9)

Watch the very first 1976 teaser for Star Wars, here. Better yet, watch a version of the preview filled with bloopers: Star Wars: Episode IV - A New Derp. If you're STILL not satisfied, watch the entire recently rediscovered blooper reel, here. It's pretty great.

Tyler Perry's A Madea Christmas
Release date: Dec. 13, 2013



Tyler Perry deserves all the success money(?) he can get (surewhynot). I mean, the man works crazy-hard! And while I didn't laugh once during this "comedy" trailer, I am flabbergasted at the rate at which he cranks out these pieces of shit. SORRY. Shouldn't say that. Trying to be positive here. OK, hmmm ... the great thing about movies is that there's something out there for everyone. Like this Madea/Larry the Cable Guy mashup. NEXT.

The Raid 2
Release date: March 2014



On Halloween night, I watched the 1986 version of The Fly. It's great, and a fun way to officially close out #ScaryMovieMonth. But then, when my non-horror-movie-loving wife and like-minded mother-in-law (visiting us for a few weeks) went to bed, I pulled up the "Safe Haven" segment from V/H/S/2 on Netflix, and I showed it to my father-in-law. It is violent and clever and intriguing and INSANE. Me and Pops, we BONDED over that shit. I was told not to bother with the rest of V/H/S/2, as director Gareth Evans' (he of The Raid: Redemption fame) entry is easily the best thing about it. My point is that I'm looking forward to The Raid 2: Berandal (original title).

Non-Stop
Release date: Feb. 28, 2014



God, I love these kinds of stupid movies. There's a hijacker on this flight! Someone dies every 20 minutes! Everyone's a suspect! The call is coming from inside the plane! Aaand ... Julianne Moore is the villain, right? Remember when Liam Neeson was Oskar Schindler? Rob Roy? Nope? Me neither. GRIZZLED ANTIHERO (who also cashes easy checks).

A Case of You
Release date: Nov. 6, 2013



Around this time of year (see: fall), I'm a pushover for gray, crisp, forlorn, romantic dramedies. The lines, "I think I'm falling in love with you," followed by, "Yeah," are just about perfect. And who doesn't love Justin Long? Sure, the whole I'M AN APPLE shtick was a little smarmy, but he's usually pretty solid in movies (see: Going the Distance). Will it be terrible? Maybe! But that's OK. Remember: something for everyone. Lastly, moviemakers: quick suggestion -- MORE DINKLAGE, LESS EVAN RACHEL WOOD. Good? Right then.

Open Grave
Release date: Jan. 3, 2014



Woozle wuzzle? No idea what this one's about, but it's mysterious and it stars Sharlto Copley, so I guess what I'm saying is that ONE TICKET PLEASE.

Labor Day
Release date: Jan. 31, 2014



This movie is going to be good. Great, even. THIS TRAILER IS HARRIBLE. I was down with it for the first 20 seconds, but then Josh Brolin and Kate Winslet start making a pie together -- mushing their hands together [erotically?] -- and I nearly barfed on my Nicholas Sparks novel. Not only does the preview commit the sin of sentimental lameness, but it also shows the entire film (except for the very end, but I'm sure we can all guess what's going to happen). REGARDLESS, Jason Reitman is a fine director, despite dated Ghost imagery. BTW, can you believe we have a GHOST PODCAST? What a great site this is!

4 comments:

  1. Not a bad selection of trailerz here Mr Dougz. The only trailer to truly annoy me is Madea, ugh it saddens me that these movies make money and Weekend at Bernie's languishes in development hell. While the best trailer this week definitely goes to The Raid 2 that one for Open Grave looks super interesting. Labor Day definitely suffers from Trailerpedia- This is when a trailer spells out everything just like a movie's Wikipedia entry (My girlfriend said she would be proud of me if I got into the F this movie glossary so I'm trying.)

    Also I can watch Liam Neeson kick ass all day, I really hope he shows up in a surprise cameo in Expendables 3 and punches Chuck Norris in the face.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Doug! I watched A Case of You. It's a movie. That's all I have to say about it. Dinklage is pretty funny though and so is Sam Rockwell (who is in a couple of scenes).

    ReplyDelete
  3. THE RAID 2 looks like what I wished ONLY GOD FORGIVES would have been.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I'm gonna see the hell out of Madea Christmas

    ReplyDelete