Inferno (1980)Watched twice; still can't abbreviate my feelings.
A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child (1989): You're just a little pregnant, versus massively.
Knock Knock (2015)Can't identify intentionally bad anymore. Thanks hipsters.
Gothic (1986): Russell: 'Explaining irrelevant, insanity exciting. Also sex.'
The Collector (2009)Sadist loves dog so not all bad.
Critters (1986)Thermometer trick? Dee won't be fooled again.
Short Night Of Glass Dolls (1972) - pimped predated version of eyes wide shut
Salo, or the 120 Days of Sodom (1975)Anybody in the mood for some chocolate?
Suspiria (1977) - Pretty colors! who's doing what where now?
The Purge: Anarchy (2014)80’s Carpenter and Russell would’ve killed this.
Nurse (2013)Her lack of eye makeup is disturbing.
Vamp (1986)The After Dark Club needs Salma Hayek
Pontypool (2008) Why podcasts beat radio: fewer zombie outbreaks.
Scream 3 (2000)David Schwimmer bailed out just in time.
Cache (2005)An Algerian gentleman misunderstands concept of revenge.
American Mary (2012)As body modification advertisement...still on fence!
Shocker (1989)WARNING...electric chair may cause corporeal dysfunction!
Diabolique (1955)Never trust French pools or bath tubs.
The Innocents (1961)Spoiler alert: little kids are super creepy.
Kuroneko (1968)Apparently, sexual abuse turns women into cats.
The Neanderthal Man (1953) - Game Warden's never seen a tiger before?OrIf Ed Wood had a real budget
The Orphanage (2007)Spoiler alert: little kids are still creepy.
Hatchet for the Honeymoon (1970)American Psycho prequel with luscious Italian visuals.
Double Indemnity (1944) [not sure if this really counts]Suddenly suspicious of my girlfriend's insurance policy
The War of the Gargantuas (1966) - "The girl gets stuck in my throat...."
We Are Still HereCome for BBQ, stay for the hospitality.
Blue Eyes of the Broken Doll (1974)There's such a thing as Spanish giallo?
Brutes and Savages (1978)With Eric Idle as Sir Arthur Davis.
Cannibal/Jungle Holocaust (1977)Can MeMe Lai survive at least once?
Cannibals/White Cannibal Queen (1980)Jess Franco has no panache for cannibals.
The Chant of Jimmie Blacksmith (1978)Why is this on the DDP list?
The Houses October Built (2014) Houses built on found footage cannot stand.
Body Parts (1991)The indignity: first defenestrated, then arm repo-ed.
The Beast With Five Fingers (1946)42 minutes until the hand shows up?!?
Dominion: Prequel to the Exorcist: I lost some souls down in Africa
Night of the Demons (1988) Most realistic teenagers in motion picture history.
The Mummy (1999)The horror, no, humor never lets up
The Inhabitants (2015) Dirs. The Rasmussen BrothersGhosts in house terrorized by awful acting.
The Collection (2012)All the coolest clubs are installing combines.
The Lazarus Effect (2015)The effect is that I cut my wrists.
Wait, your review for The Hateful Eight?
The Mangler (1995)Englund's more ridiculous than haunted laundry press.
Shriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday the Thirteenth (2000)This makes Scary Movie look like Airplane.
Deliver Us from Evil (2014)Joel McHale knife-fights Satan. 'Nuff said.
[Rec] 3: GenesisSomething borrowed, something blue, damn hearing aid!
PumpkinheadWell at least Lance Henriksen was good.
Duel(1971)Near encounters of the tractor trailer kind
The Ghost Story (1979)Shaw Bros. provide nude, heart eatin' demons.
Halloween (1978)My wife can not handle this movie.
Dawn of the Dead (2004 Dir. Zack Snyder)Mall security all trained by John Wick.
The House of the Devil (2009)I should just watch this on repeat.
Cursed (2005)I heard Christina Ricci has three vaginas.
Prom Night (1980)Less than Halloween, more than Terror Train.
Buried Alive (1990) Murder is pure. This movie is not.
Army of Darkness (1992)Strike another entry off my "movie shames".
Dracula (1931)Wow. Dracu-Doug really sounds just like him.
Discopathe (2013)Such blatant disrespect to vinyl and Canada.
Resolution (2012)I wanted to smoke crack after this.
Dahmer (2002)Renner lends his ugly hands to Dahmer
Under the Skin (2013)The scariest film I've seen all month.
Scream 1 1996 Chocolate cake after watching Wishmaster 3, 4!
Day of the Dead (1985)Bub shaves and calls his aunt Aleisha
Shaun of the Dead (2004)There are few horror comedies this good.
The Fog (1980)John Carpenter, once again, is the man
Pan's Labyrinth (2006)No Pan, and Captain's clock noticeably uneaten.