"Bloody Birthday" (1981, Dir. Ed Hunt)Teenagers misunderstand the concept of grave robbing.
DEVILS OF DARKNESS (1965)England's not welcoming to French vampire cults
FRIDAY THE 13TH (1980, dir. Sean S. Cunningham)Counsellors ill-equipped to face their mommy issues.
Ha! 😀
Great one!
HEREDITARY (2018) dir Ari Aster"Anyone seen my piano wire?....never mind."
Crawl (2019)See you later alligator, after 'while crocodile.
Hereditary (2018)Best use of Chekhov's nuts I've seen.
HEREDITARY (2018) dir Ari Aster(Michael Caine voice):"Some men want to watch Gabriel burn."
Love it
Brightburn (2019)We need to talk about Kal El
Shakma (1990)Is it shallow to appreciate Shakma's ass?
Dracula (1931, Tod Browning)As October falls, the Swan Lake calls.
House of 1000 Corpses (2003) Inside Rob Zombies Brain: The Cinematic Experience
Thought that was "The Haunted World of El Superbeasto"?
The Ritual (2018)Next time stick with hillbillies on Appalachian...
Scanners (1981, David Cronenberg)Ironside’s o-faces compensate Lack’s wack acting lack.
•A Nightmare On Elm Street (2010)•...running the series, beginning with marginal reboot...(also)...unfortunate recasting; requires Kane Hodder’s iconic portrayal...
SUSPIRIA (1978) Which witch is best? Original of course!
White Zombie (1932)"Cut! LEGOSI, quit looking into the lens!!!"OrZombie Zaddy Bela could 'pull the string'
Rosemary's Baby (1968)"See? Nosey neighbors are just the worst!"
The Devil's Doorway (2018)"Church mistreats children, shot like documentary, hmm..."
Crawl (2019, Alexandre Aja)Barry Pepper could have just sniped them!
Hell House LLC 3: Lake of Fire (2019)"...thought there'd be at least one lake..."
Piranha (1978)Charming protagonists unwittingly unleash predators on children
The Uninvited (1944):A gypsy and a lesbian ghost story
It (2017, dir. Andy Muschietti)Why is this named after Information Technology?
Our IT guy is way creepier than Pennywise, so...appropriate!
Burnt Offerings (1976)Giving chauffeurs a bad name since 1976.
Black Christmas (1974)Billy...Billy don't you lose my number.
🤩
SPECIES (1995) Talented actors star in cheesy boob movie.
The Terror (1963, Roger Corman)Corman- "I've gotta have more bird attacks."
Zombieland (2009)Murray scenes a surprise and a treat
The Banana Splits Movie (2019; Danishka Esterhazy)Relax...it only FEELS five nights long...
Superstition (1982, dir. James W. Roberson)Hollywood: Microwaves don't make heads do that.
The Uninvited (2009): Unfinished buisness is sometimes best left unfinished.
Suspiria (1977)Needs another hour and a hostage crisis.
This comment has been removed by the author.
SPECIES II (1998) Her name’s Eve. Get it? GET IT???
Army of Darkness (1992, dir. Sam Raimi) (with Red Letter Media's commentary)Oh shit, there's a camera chasing me!
Audition (1999)If only Asami had auditioned for Weinstein.
The Wicker Man (1973)Britt Ekland captivated me with her…singing.
28 Days Later (2002)Movie portrays England as all the Rage.
Get Out (2017)There’s so many layers to Peele back.
Stitches (2012)Wrong act for Chekhov's knife, you clown!
Death By InvitationSound effects credit: keyboard in demo mode
Wrong Turn (2003)Childhood tree climbing did come in handy!
Symptoms (1974)Ever wished Polanski's Repulsion was much slower?
SPECIES III (2004) First Ghoulies, now Species goes to college.
Seed Of Chucky (2004)Opens with homage to Look Who's Talking
The Vault (2017)James Franco's mustache was the scariest part.
The Houses October Built (2014)Probably the most likable found footage characters.
House on Haunted Hill (1959)I see nothing wrong with this marriage.
Return of the Living Dead (1985)Blood, brains, boobs... What's not to like?
Hatchet 3 (2013) And Cody Blue Snider as Private Hudson
Gremlins 2: The New Batch (1990) Dir. Joe DanteDante, literally, does whatever he fucking wants.
Agreed!
The RangerAt least they didn’t get cabin fever.
SPECIES IV: THE AWAKENING (2007) Gives new meaning to “The Flying Nun.”
Shadow of the Vampire (2000)Wait, nobody cuts their own guts out??
Return of the Living Dead (1985)Is that fella considered a Trash Humper?
Blade (1998)Frost wants La Magra. Explodes like Kananga.
Night of the Living Deb (2015)Better than I expected, which wasn't much.
Idle Hands (1999)I stilla cannot believe what I Sawa!
Summer of 84 (2018)Those kids made Mad Men really mad.
Night of the Scarecrow (1995)More like a Scare-people, am I right?
Hell Fest (2018) - Ring toss employee has high moral values.
Psycho (1960)A diner a day keeps "Psycho" away.
Almost HumanThis is how you remake Xtro films
The Black Cat (1934)Does anybody here know how to knock?!
Candyman (1992)Least funny episode of 'Good Times' ever.
Christine (1983) Bullied kid gets sweet ride. Me? Pantsed!
The Leopard Man (1943, Jacques Tourneur)No incest? Not the right commentary movie?OrThis leopard works 60%, all the time
The Church (1989) Dir. Michele SoaviHuh? Wait, wait...let me rephrase. WHAT?
The Haunting (1999) Owen Wilson in over his head, wow
Return of the Fly (1959) - The kid can't remember seeing "Help me!"????????????
Alien: Covenant (2017)Freud: "Sometimes, a flute's just a robopenis."
🤣
The Tingler (1959) - Spousal murder and Vincent Price on LSD.
The Prowler (1981)Oh, so that's what pitchforks are for.
Prince of Darkness (1987)See this green shit? It's the devil.
Terrified (2017)Nice creepy film delivered on day 2.
Body Bags (1993)Body Parts already did the "Eye" better
Phantasm (1979)Creepy Crawlies and Counterclockwise Cutters. Classic Coscarelli!
Orphan (2009): Not exactly a propaganda piece for adoption
DEADLY DETENTION (2017) “Horror Breakfast Club” shouldn’t be this disappointing.
Day of the Dead (2008)Zack Snyder is rolling in his grave.
The Hitcher (1986) I bet John Ryder would dig Uber.
As Above, So Below (2014)Speedrun for macguffin; was macguffin all along
Jason Goes To Hell: The Final Friday (1993)That's it! This is the *final* Friday!
Broken Lizard's Club Dread (2004)I probably shouldn't but I like it.
Mom's Got a Date With a Vampire (2000)Yo Feige, this better be on Disney+.
Child's Play (1988)Wait...using that much butter is bad?
A Quiet Place (2018)(Best sign language seven word review ever)
Sweet Sixteen (1983, dir. Jim Sotos)Ok, sing it with me now: “Melissaaaaaa...”
Maximum Overdrive (1986) Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Evil Dead (2013) Dir. Fede AlvarezWell...at least she's off the smack.
ALICE, SWEET ALICE (1976, dir. Alfred Sole)This kid is psycho! Wait, maybe not?
House of 1000 Corpses (2003)Who got to sculpt dead fishboy Dwight??
Hereditary (2018)Second viewing, movie has legs!...no head
Big Ass Spider! (2013)Lies are just webs without spiders - Nietzsche
The Furies (2019, dir. Tony D’Aquino)The Running Man but with slashers. Awesome.
The Changeling (1980)George C. Scott: America's unsung surly scream queen?
Rampant (2018)Zombies! Palace Intrigue! Swords! Those fancy hats!
The Addiction (1995)‘Why the angst?’ Just watched The Addiction.
The Bye Bye Man (2017; dir: Stacy Title)I completely forgot I watched this already.
The Conjuring (2013)Ok, but how EXACTLY was Annabelle created?
Scream (1996) People don't talk enough about Wes Carpenter
Puppet Master: The Littlest ReichJust goofin', just new killer puppet goofin'
Friday The 13th Part 2 (1981) Ginny roleplays as mom. Still would smash.
Scream (1996)Henry Winkler is the most sympathetic character.
Lifeforce (1985)Love Halley's portrait hanging in the Churchill.
Disturbing Behavior (1998)Honestly, I meant to watch The Faculty.
Tales of Halloween (Lucky McKee and others, 2015)Some clever, some ok, as are anthologies.
Dr. Giggles (1992) Still gives better care than the VA.
Re-Animator (1985)Great watch with a first time viewer!
Hollow Man (2000)Actually best PSA about workplace sexual harassment
Possession (1981)This film is discomfortable but also fascinating
"Bloody Birthday" (1981, Dir. Ed Hunt)
ReplyDeleteTeenagers misunderstand the concept of grave robbing.
DEVILS OF DARKNESS (1965)
ReplyDeleteEngland's not welcoming to French vampire cults
FRIDAY THE 13TH (1980, dir. Sean S. Cunningham)
ReplyDeleteCounsellors ill-equipped to face their mommy issues.
Ha! 😀
DeleteGreat one!
DeleteHEREDITARY (2018) dir Ari Aster
ReplyDelete"Anyone seen my piano wire?
....never mind."
Crawl (2019)
ReplyDeleteSee you later alligator, after 'while crocodile.
Hereditary (2018)
ReplyDeleteBest use of Chekhov's nuts I've seen.
HEREDITARY (2018) dir Ari Aster
ReplyDelete(Michael Caine voice):
"Some men want to watch Gabriel burn."
Love it
DeleteBrightburn (2019)
ReplyDeleteWe need to talk about Kal El
Shakma (1990)
ReplyDeleteIs it shallow to appreciate Shakma's ass?
Dracula (1931, Tod Browning)
ReplyDeleteAs October falls, the Swan Lake calls.
House of 1000 Corpses (2003)
ReplyDeleteInside Rob Zombies Brain: The Cinematic Experience
Thought that was "The Haunted World of El Superbeasto"?
DeleteThe Ritual (2018)
ReplyDeleteNext time stick with hillbillies on Appalachian...
Scanners (1981, David Cronenberg)
ReplyDeleteIronside’s o-faces compensate Lack’s wack acting lack.
•A Nightmare On Elm Street (2010)•
ReplyDelete...running the series, beginning with marginal reboot...
(also)
...unfortunate recasting; requires Kane Hodder’s iconic portrayal...
SUSPIRIA (1978)
ReplyDeleteWhich witch is best? Original of course!
White Zombie (1932)
ReplyDelete"Cut! LEGOSI, quit looking into the lens!!!"
Or
Zombie Zaddy Bela could 'pull the string'
Rosemary's Baby (1968)
ReplyDelete"See? Nosey neighbors are just the worst!"
The Devil's Doorway (2018)
ReplyDelete"Church mistreats children, shot like documentary, hmm..."
Crawl (2019, Alexandre Aja)
ReplyDeleteBarry Pepper could have just sniped them!
Hell House LLC 3: Lake of Fire (2019)
ReplyDelete"...thought there'd be at least one lake..."
Piranha (1978)
ReplyDeleteCharming protagonists unwittingly unleash predators on children
The Uninvited (1944):
ReplyDeleteA gypsy and a lesbian ghost story
It (2017, dir. Andy Muschietti)
ReplyDeleteWhy is this named after Information Technology?
Our IT guy is way creepier than Pennywise, so...appropriate!
DeleteBurnt Offerings (1976)
ReplyDeleteGiving chauffeurs a bad name since 1976.
Black Christmas (1974)
ReplyDeleteBilly...Billy don't you lose my number.
🤩
DeleteSPECIES (1995)
ReplyDeleteTalented actors star in cheesy boob movie.
The Terror (1963, Roger Corman)
ReplyDeleteCorman- "I've gotta have more bird attacks."
Zombieland (2009)
ReplyDeleteMurray scenes a surprise and a treat
The Banana Splits Movie (2019; Danishka Esterhazy)
ReplyDeleteRelax...it only FEELS five nights long...
Superstition (1982, dir. James W. Roberson)
ReplyDeleteHollywood: Microwaves don't make heads do that.
The Uninvited (2009):
ReplyDeleteUnfinished buisness is sometimes best left unfinished.
Suspiria (1977)
ReplyDeleteNeeds another hour and a hostage crisis.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteSPECIES II (1998)
ReplyDeleteHer name’s Eve. Get it? GET IT???
Army of Darkness (1992, dir. Sam Raimi) (with Red Letter Media's commentary)
ReplyDeleteOh shit, there's a camera chasing me!
Audition (1999)
ReplyDeleteIf only Asami had auditioned for Weinstein.
The Wicker Man (1973)
ReplyDeleteBritt Ekland captivated me with her…singing.
28 Days Later (2002)
ReplyDeleteMovie portrays England as all the Rage.
Get Out (2017)
ReplyDeleteThere’s so many layers to Peele back.
Stitches (2012)
ReplyDeleteWrong act for Chekhov's knife, you clown!
Death By Invitation
ReplyDeleteSound effects credit: keyboard in demo mode
Wrong Turn (2003)
ReplyDeleteChildhood tree climbing did come in handy!
Symptoms (1974)
ReplyDeleteEver wished Polanski's Repulsion was much slower?
SPECIES III (2004)
ReplyDeleteFirst Ghoulies, now Species goes to college.
Seed Of Chucky (2004)
ReplyDeleteOpens with homage to Look Who's Talking
The Vault (2017)
ReplyDeleteJames Franco's mustache was the scariest part.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteThe Houses October Built (2014)
ReplyDeleteProbably the most likable found footage characters.
House on Haunted Hill (1959)
ReplyDeleteI see nothing wrong with this marriage.
Return of the Living Dead (1985)
ReplyDeleteBlood, brains, boobs... What's not to like?
Hatchet 3 (2013)
ReplyDeleteAnd Cody Blue Snider as Private Hudson
Gremlins 2: The New Batch (1990) Dir. Joe Dante
ReplyDeleteDante, literally, does whatever he fucking wants.
Agreed!
DeleteThe Ranger
ReplyDeleteAt least they didn’t get cabin fever.
SPECIES IV: THE AWAKENING (2007)
ReplyDeleteGives new meaning to “The Flying Nun.”
Shadow of the Vampire (2000)
ReplyDeleteWait, nobody cuts their own guts out??
Return of the Living Dead (1985)
ReplyDeleteIs that fella considered a Trash Humper?
Blade (1998)
ReplyDeleteFrost wants La Magra. Explodes like Kananga.
Night of the Living Deb (2015)
ReplyDeleteBetter than I expected, which wasn't much.
Idle Hands (1999)
ReplyDeleteI stilla cannot believe what I Sawa!
Summer of 84 (2018)
ReplyDeleteThose kids made Mad Men really mad.
Night of the Scarecrow (1995)
ReplyDeleteMore like a Scare-people, am I right?
Hell Fest (2018) - Ring toss employee has high moral values.
ReplyDeletePsycho (1960)
ReplyDeleteA diner a day keeps "Psycho" away.
Almost Human
ReplyDeleteThis is how you remake Xtro films
The Black Cat (1934)
ReplyDeleteDoes anybody here know how to knock?!
Candyman (1992)
ReplyDeleteLeast funny episode of 'Good Times' ever.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteChristine (1983) Bullied kid gets sweet ride. Me? Pantsed!
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteThe Leopard Man (1943, Jacques Tourneur)
ReplyDeleteNo incest? Not the right commentary movie?
Or
This leopard works 60%, all the time
The Church (1989) Dir. Michele Soavi
ReplyDeleteHuh? Wait, wait...let me rephrase. WHAT?
The Haunting (1999)
ReplyDeleteOwen Wilson in over his head, wow
Return of the Fly (1959) - The kid can't remember seeing "Help me!"????????????
ReplyDeleteAlien: Covenant (2017)
ReplyDeleteFreud: "Sometimes, a flute's just a robopenis."
🤣
DeleteThe Tingler (1959) - Spousal murder and Vincent Price on LSD.
ReplyDeleteThe Prowler (1981)
ReplyDeleteOh, so that's what pitchforks are for.
Prince of Darkness (1987)
ReplyDeleteSee this green shit? It's the devil.
Terrified (2017)
ReplyDeleteNice creepy film delivered on day 2.
Body Bags (1993)
ReplyDeleteBody Parts already did the "Eye" better
Phantasm (1979)
ReplyDeleteCreepy Crawlies and Counterclockwise Cutters. Classic Coscarelli!
Orphan (2009):
ReplyDeleteNot exactly a propaganda piece for adoption
DEADLY DETENTION (2017)
ReplyDelete“Horror Breakfast Club” shouldn’t be this disappointing.
Day of the Dead (2008)
ReplyDeleteZack Snyder is rolling in his grave.
The Hitcher (1986) I bet John Ryder would dig Uber.
ReplyDeleteAs Above, So Below (2014)
ReplyDeleteSpeedrun for macguffin; was macguffin all along
Jason Goes To Hell: The Final Friday (1993)
ReplyDeleteThat's it! This is the *final* Friday!
Broken Lizard's Club Dread (2004)
ReplyDeleteI probably shouldn't but I like it.
Mom's Got a Date With a Vampire (2000)
ReplyDeleteYo Feige, this better be on Disney+.
Child's Play (1988)
ReplyDeleteWait...using that much butter is bad?
A Quiet Place (2018)
ReplyDelete(Best sign language seven word review ever)
Sweet Sixteen (1983, dir. Jim Sotos)
ReplyDeleteOk, sing it with me now: “Melissaaaaaa...”
Maximum Overdrive (1986) Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
ReplyDeleteEvil Dead (2013) Dir. Fede Alvarez
ReplyDeleteWell...at least she's off the smack.
ALICE, SWEET ALICE (1976, dir. Alfred Sole)
ReplyDeleteThis kid is psycho! Wait, maybe not?
House of 1000 Corpses (2003)
ReplyDeleteWho got to sculpt dead fishboy Dwight??
Hereditary (2018)
ReplyDeleteSecond viewing, movie has legs!...no head
Big Ass Spider! (2013)
ReplyDeleteLies are just webs without spiders - Nietzsche
The Furies (2019, dir. Tony D’Aquino)
ReplyDeleteThe Running Man but with slashers. Awesome.
The Changeling (1980)
ReplyDeleteGeorge C. Scott: America's unsung surly scream queen?
Rampant (2018)
ReplyDeleteZombies! Palace Intrigue! Swords! Those fancy hats!
The Addiction (1995)
ReplyDelete‘Why the angst?’ Just watched The Addiction.
The Bye Bye Man (2017; dir: Stacy Title)
ReplyDeleteI completely forgot I watched this already.
The Conjuring (2013)
ReplyDeleteOk, but how EXACTLY was Annabelle created?
Scream (1996)
ReplyDeletePeople don't talk enough about Wes Carpenter
Puppet Master: The Littlest Reich
ReplyDeleteJust goofin', just new killer puppet goofin'
Friday The 13th Part 2 (1981) Ginny roleplays as mom. Still would smash.
ReplyDeleteScream (1996)
ReplyDeleteHenry Winkler is the most sympathetic character.
Lifeforce (1985)
ReplyDeleteLove Halley's portrait hanging in the Churchill.
Disturbing Behavior (1998)
ReplyDeleteHonestly, I meant to watch The Faculty.
Tales of Halloween (Lucky McKee and others, 2015)
ReplyDeleteSome clever, some ok, as are anthologies.
Dr. Giggles (1992) Still gives better care than the VA.
ReplyDeleteRe-Animator (1985)
ReplyDeleteGreat watch with a first time viewer!
Hollow Man (2000)
ReplyDeleteActually best PSA about workplace sexual harassment
Possession (1981)
ReplyDeleteThis film is discomfortable but also fascinating