Friday, November 9, 2012

Watchin' Trailerz with Doug (Nov. 9)

Anyone else watch Dave on Tuesday night? No? Just me? By myself? With a box of Kleenex? Talk about your #ScaryMovieNight, amIright? Listen, we're all glad the election's over, because now we can get back to what we really care about -- MOVIES!

Side Effects
Release date: Feb. 8, 2013

ALERT! ALERT! New Steven Soderbergh/Channing Tatum/Jude Law/Rooney Mara movie! ALERT! ALERT! It's weird that I'm more excited by the inclusion of Channing Tatum than I am by Jude Law. I never would've guessed that two years ago. But, now, Tatum is Haywire, while Law is a creepy-pedo-skeleton of his former Talented Mr. Ripley self (i.e., Eagle). So what is this movie? Is it a sequel to Contagion? Doesn't appear to be. Is it Limitless 2? Not enough NZT. Is it a sexy thriller in which Tatum and Law and Rooney Mara all kiss each other? But, you know ... while doped up on drugs? Let's hope!

Silent Night
Release date: Nov. 30, 2012

It was only a matter of time before the original Silent Night, Deadly Night was remade into a schlocky, gritty, green-and-yellow Saw-inspired modern-day barf-fest. And with the inclusion of Jaime King (i.e., former model JAMES King), this trailer also has a My Bloody Valentine feel. Which is fine, inasmuch as I enjoyed that movie, but probably only because I saw it in the PERFECT CIRCUMSTANCES (i.e., with all of my friends who goofed on it nonstop). Director Steven C. Miller's (the "C" is for "[insert your funny guesses in the comments below]") only other credits are titled Automaton Transfusion, Scream of the Banshee and The Aggression Scale, so, you know ... GOOD STUFF.

The Central Park Five
Release date: Nov. 23, 2012

I don't usually feature documentaries in this column, but this preview genuinely moved me. Such a complex and interesting and sad story. And it's codirected by Ken Burns, who, like, TOTALLY made me rethink JAZZ (jay-kay). Being from Chicago, I never heard this story before. Likewise, New York City's Central Park in the late 1980s might as well be Neptune for all I know about it, so I'm interested on a sociological level, too. What I'm saying is, isn't it about time I learned something?

Release date: Jan. 4, 2013

No, not A Late Quartet (featured here in September), but ANOTHER kind of aging musician story featuring dowdy, elitist characters "finding themselves" at a critical juncture in their lives. This one is directed by Dustin Hoffman (his directorial debut?). This one also stars Dumbledore and McGonagall. So this one.

Alter Egos
Release date: online Nov. 20, 2012

The early buzz on this movie is that it's TERRIBLE (or, at least, boring). But the trailer's not half bad. It just feels like it's from 2004. Obviously, there are several other movies that already did it better. Kick-Ass, Super ... even Mystery Men. But let's give it a try, F-Heads! And don't let that fact that it's associated with Kevin Smith's Smodcast Pictures discourage you!

Midnight's Children
Release date: TBA

Uh, whu? I mean, yes -- this looks beautiful and epic and parts are compelling and there are several intriguing ideas, I just don't know what the heck's going on. I know I complain a lot about previews giving entire plots away, but this takes a decidedly different approach. Based on Salman Rushdie's Booker Prize-winning novel ("Ooooh, the BOOKER Prize!" -you), several have called it "unfilmable." Just like Cloud Atlas, Where the Wild Things Are, Watchmen, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, and The Lord of the Rings trilogy. Judge it for yourselves!

Holy Motors
Release date: Nov. 9, 2012

ART! #dodougsjobforhim


  1. I saw Holy Motors tonight at the Music Box. It's one of those movies where you are convinced it's top 10 of the year material for the first 45 minutes and then the air goes out of the balloon and you patiently wait for it to be over.

  2. Was that Frank Miller in Silent Night?