FTM 784: THE GRIFTERS

Patrick and Rosalie pull the ultimate con.

2K Replay: IDENTITY

by Adam Riske

Nominated for “Trippiest Movie of the Year” at the Golden Schmoes Awards. It lost to Kill Bill Vol. 1.

FTM 644: GROSSE POINTE BLANK

Patrick and Mark Ahn are handsome devils. Popcorn!

Reserved Seating Swings for the Fences: EIGHT MEN OUT

by Adam Riske and Rob DiCristino

The review duo who have 99 problems, but cheating at baseball ain’t one.

Reserved Seating Goes All Pacino: CITY HALL

by Adam Riske and Rob DiCristino

The review duo who lives by the rule of Menschkeit.

I Gave Her My Heart, She Gave Me a Pen: Loss in SAY ANYTHING

by Adam Thas

I’m assuming, and hoping that any of you reading this have seen Say Anything, and if you haven’t, you should watch it now, and then watch it again. It’s one of my three all-time favorite movies (it switches between which one I’ve seen most recently) and in my opinion it’s perfect.

Catching Up With My Crushes: John Cusack

by Stephanie Crawford

There's a scene in War Inc., a satire that John Cusack wrote, where his character Brad Hauser mutters "Be still my trembling hands, for how you would tremble if you knew where I would take you next." Not to put too fine a point on it, but I wouldnít be surprised if Cusack has muttered that to himself before embarking on certain films. I wouldn't be surprised because from his early '80s teen comedies to his current spate of films that (mainly) focus on his characters' darker nature, there seems to be a controlled chaos. Within that chaos, there is a theme, which is that John Cusack loves the craft of acting so much that he will eschew trends, Q Scores and critical acclaim if he thinks he can get his hands thoroughly, honestly dirty into a role.

Professional Appreciators: Learning About Love from High Fidelity

by Rob DiCristino

“What came first, the music or the misery?”

Review: Cell

by Patrick Bromley

I'm a huge fan of Stephen King, but Cell is not one of my favorite novels he's written. It stands to reason, I guess, that the movie version of Cell isn't one of my favorite Stephen King movies.

Review: Chi-Raq

by Adam Riske

I am dumbfounded by how little I appreciated Chi-Raq.

Review: Love and Mercy

by Adam Riske

One of my favorite movies of the year so far.

Netflix This Movie! Vol. 127

These are not movies you might have chosen to watch if not for us telling you to.

Netflix This Movie! Vol. 116

When I say "Netflix," you say "This Movie!"

Movies I Love: Better Off Dead

Kick off 1985 Week with one of my favorite teen comedies of all time!

F This Movie! - High Fidelity

Patrick and JB know that what really matters is what you like, not what you are like.

Actors We Love

These are the men we like best to watch on screen, even if we don't always like what it is we're watching.

F This Movie! - F Romantic Comedies!

Patrick and Erika spend Valentine's Day discussing the current state of romantic comedies, choosing 10 (or more) worthwhile entries in the genre and turning the podcast into a schmoopfest.


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Also discussed this episode: Just Go With It (2011)

F These Hitman Movies

The Jason Statham remake of The Mechanic comes out this week, and I'm sure it will be to die for. Just kidding. It will be a hit. Number one with a bullet. What I mean is that I'm sure it will murder our eyes. Let's F past hitman movies.

1. The Jackal (1997) - Bruce Willis toupee parade + Richard Gere's Irish accent + rampant homophobia + Mathilda May with clothes on + armless Jack Black = you're welcome.

2. Wanted (2008) - If you were to combine The Matrix with Fight Club and a craaaazy Russian, this is the movie you might get. How much you enjoy Wanted is entirely dependent on just how stupid you want your movies to be. And how much of boring Angelina Jolie's gross, bony, boring ass you'd like to see. Very much!

3. Panic (2000) - A fantastic, barely-released hitman comedy-drama from Henry Bromell, who hadn't made a film before this and hasn't had a theatrical film since. Underseen and underrated. William H. Macy is duh great and the movie has some very dark things to say about fathers and sons. Plus, Neve Campbell makes out with a girl if you're into that sort of thing. Very much!

4. Grosse Pointe Blank (1997) - It's hard to make a movie that's genuinely cool without being self-conscious, but that's what John Cusack and his friends were able to do with this pitch-black comedy. It gives Cusack one of his best roles ever: ascerbic, cynical, dark and homicidal. Much of it feels dated now, but I love it a lot. I don't want to get into a semantic argument about it, I just want the protein.

5. Assassins (1995) - You might think that on a list of good hitman movies, a movie called Assassins might be looked at favorably. You might be wrong. You ARE wrong (this is also true of Hitman). Sylvester Stallone is boring, the script by the pre-Matrix Wachowski siblings is nonsense and Amber Waves keeps her pants on the whole time.

6. The Killer (1989) - It's impossible to picture the '90s movie landscape without John Woo's cult classic. There's a lot of what we like about John Woo on display, too, but it's been 20 years and maybe now we can admit that the movie is a tad too operatic (because John Woo) and a little overrated. We're still nerd friends, right?

7. The Professional (1994) - One of the best hitman movies since Le Samourai; it's not coincidence that both are FRENCH (add La Femme Nikita to the list and they've got the market cornered). I'll get lots of shit for saying this, but the weakest part of the movie is still Gary Oldman. In a movie that's very European in its tone and attitude, his character and performance is VERY LOUD AND AMERICAN. Not bad, just out of touch with what's around him. And a little bad. Wee Natalie Portman is great, and it might be the first/last time Jean Reno was interesting.

8. Le Samourai (1967) - Il n'y a pas de plus profonde solitude que celle de samouraï si ce n'est celle d'un tigre dans la jungle... peut-être...

9. Bangkok Dangerous (2008) - Someone please wake Nicolas Cage, please. With BEES.

10. Ghost Dog: The Way of the Samurai (1999) - Ignoring the fact that this movie has one of the worst/best/worst titles this side of Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever, Jim Jarmusch's hip-hop/gangster/samurai mash-up is actually very awesome. There is nothing about these elements that should work together. There's nothing about Forrest Whitaker that should work, either, and yet most of him does.

F These Movies in Which John Cusack Collects a Paycheck

John Cusack is unassailably awesome, and an actor of unusual integrity -- that is, when he's not appearing in shitty movies for the purposes of making it rain. Let's f those movies. Dolla dolla bills, y'all.