F This Movie! - Braveheart

Patrick and Mark Ahn would gladly trade their freedom for another Mad Max movie.



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Also discussed this episode: The Third Man, That Obscure Object of Desire,  Punch-Drunk Love, Wanderlust, Blitz

15 Movie Stars Who Tried to be Singers

"Sh!#ting on the Classics" is off this week, so in its place please enjoy this list of movie stars who have attempted to branch out and shit on their own classics. And by "classics," I mean "music."

Heavy Action: Showdown in Little Tokyo / Rapid Fire

This week's Heavy Action takes a look at an action star taken from us far too young: one Brandon Lee, son of Bruce, who was killed in a freak accident during the filming of his 1994 movie The Crow. He could have been one of the greats. To us fans of Rapid Fire, he still is.

I'll Watch Anything: Doug Watches The Garbage Pail Kids Movie

Who is this movie for? Seriously. Is it you? If it's you, please say so.

15 Lesser-Known TV Shows Based on Movies

A long time ago, we wrote about movies based on TV shows. But did you know it works the other way, too, and that some TV shows actually started out as movies? Anything is possible and the future is now. There are plenty of good TV shows that started out as movies: MASH, Friday Night Lights, Buffy the Vampire Slayer. At least, I've heard that people like MASH and Friday Night Lights; I've never seen either one, because no vampires. The point is this: there are way more terrible shows that started out as movies. Here are but a few.

F This Movie! - Patrick's Favorite Movies

Doug and JB talk Patrick through his five picks as the Favorite Movies series at long last comes to an end.



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Also discussed this episode: Tango & Cash, The Woman in Black, Humanoids from the Deep, Grand Theft Auto, This Means War

Sh!#ting on the Classics: Love Story

What can you say about a forty-two year-old film that dies? That it was beautiful and brilliant? It was not. That it loved showing us two bad actors endlessly cavorting in the snow...had no concern whatsoever with dramatic logic or continuity...and still bugs me?

Heavy Action: Raw Deal / Tango & Cash / Assassins

Having binged on action movies in the last couple of days, it seemed like a good time to devote a column to one of my favorite and least reputable genres. Without further ado...HEAVY ACTION!

Watchin' Trailerz with Doug (February 17)

The trailer for Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter was released this week (you can check it out here). If you've been dying to see a dude dressed like Abraham Lincoln (complete with stovepipe hat) acting a ninja, murdering CGI vampires, then this movie was made for you. I really don't know how I feel about it yet. The title is hilarious, but director Timur Bekmambetov is assuring everyone that the movie is completely serious. Which is good? I love Starship Troopers more than most, and part of the reason it's so goddamned great is because there's a complete lack of self-awareness. The joke isn't telegraphed, and that also appears to be the case here. So ... good? Yay? I'm happy about this? What do you guys think?

F This Movie! - Doug's Favorite Movies

On the penultimate installment of the "favorite movies" series, Doug explains to Patrick why he's the richest man in town, how a German orders three drinks and why the only good bug is a dead bug.



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Also discussed this episode: Haywire, The China Syndrome, Chronicle, It'$ Only Money, The Innkeepers

Sh!#ting on the Classics: Oscar, Shmoskar, Part Deux

Hey, F’Heads! It is Valentine’s Day! Do not forget to give your significant other some flowers, or a fancy dinner, or chocolates, or a handmade coupon for a free backrub, or a willingness to try that thing (not THAT thing, the other thing) that your hubby has been pestering you about for the better part of 156 months.

My Valentine this year is the Oscars! I am giving the Oscars a homemade pie made out of poo. Allow me to explain.

Doug Asks Patrick Questions About Movies

Patrick knows a lot about movies. Doug has seen Wild Things dozens of times. In an effort to expand Doug's cinematic horizons, he'll be asking Patrick questions about movies in a column we're calling "Doug Asks Patrick Questions About Movies."

Watchin' Trailerz with Doug (February 10)

Anyone else still recovering from last weekend's epic #FThisMovieFest? I know I am. When I close my eyes, all I see are gelflings. Thousands upon thousands of hideous geflings, direct from the uncanny valley. Funny, because it JUST AS EASILY could've been Phoebe Cates' boobs. That's what the smart money was on. "I love boobs!" -Doug. BUT NO -- gelflings. Every day. All night. Why have you forsaken me, 1982?! Here's the newest batch of trailers, fresh from Hollywood's shame oven. I'm purposely not featuring The Amazing Spider-Man (it's here if you really want to see it), because a.) it's already been showcased on this site before, and b.) really? Really. Really? C'mon. Few movies (not just superhero films) are better than Spider-Man 2. Can't we all just leave well enough alone?

Introducing "I'll Watch Anything!"

Doug came up with an idea for a new feature, and YOU can take part!

The F This Movie! 100

Sh!#ting on the Classics: Oscar, Shmoskar

Two weeks ago, the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences announced their nominations for their annual “Oscar” awards. The Academy yet again provided a small, perfect example of what is wrong with the Oscars, indeed, what has been wrong with the Oscars since their inception (the film that should have won Best Picture last year).

Brad Pitt appeared in two films in 2011; in one, he gave a strange, nuanced performance that even people who hate the film have commented on favorably. In the other, he phoned in a grinning, “aw shucks” big star performance. Guess which one got the nomination?

F This Movie! - The 100th Episode Spectacular!

Our 100th show.



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It's F This Movie Fest!!!

The day has finally arrived! F This Movie Fest starts at Noon CST!

EVERYONE: TWITTER SAYS WE ARE OVER THE LIMIT FOR TWEETS. PLEASE FOLLOW THE #FTHISMOVIEFEST SEARCH TERM TO FOLLOW ALONG!!!

Log on to Twitter and talk about all five movies along with us. Just make sure to follow F This Movie!, direct all comments to @fthismovie and tag everything #fthismoviefest.

If you've forgotten the lineup, check it out here.

This is going to be THE BEST. Thanks to everyone who made it possible and everyone for taking part!

Watchin' Trailerz with Doug (February 3)

In celebration of the first ever F This Movie Fest, here are the original theatrical trailers from the five films featured! Enjoy!

F This Movie! - JB's Favorite Movies

With just one more show to go before the 100th episode spectacular, Patrick and JB talk about some of JB's old favorites. And we do mean old.

Don't forget to join us for the first F This Movie Fest on Saturday, February 4!



Download this episode here. (72.7 MB)

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Also discussed this episode: Melancholia, Haywire, Godspell, Man on a Ledge, Witness for the Prosecution