by Adam Riske
2020 Oscar Movies I Couldn’t See Until 2021 Power Ranking: 1) The United States vs. Billie Holiday, 2) Minari, 3) Judas and the Black Messiah, 4) Nomadland
Best Anthology: The French Dispatch
Best Cameo: Matt Damon, No Sudden Move
Best Comic Book Movie: Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings
Best Community Theater Adaptation: The Many Saints of Newark
Best Documentary: Val
Best Duo: Thomasin McKenzie and Anya Taylor-Joy, Last Night in Soho
Best Exasperated Facial Expressions: Rebecca Hall, The Night House
Best Jewish Movie: Shiva Baby
Best Netflix Movie: The Power of the Dog
Best Opening Sequence: A Quite Place Part II
Best Performance: Nicolas Cage, Pig
Better Than I Expected: Shadow in the Cloud
Biggest Surprise: Wrath of Man being both Guy Ritchie and Jason Statham’s best movie
Blech: The Guilty (2021)
Depressing: Woodstock 99: Peace, Love and Rage
Did I Hallucinate It? Old
Dumbest Shit Ever: Ghostbusters: Afterlife
Eh: Rocky IV: Rocky Vs. Drago
Enough Already: C’mon C’mon
First Movie Back in an Indoor Movie Theater: Godzilla vs. Kong
Fun: The Suicide Squad
Funny: PG: Psycho Goreman
Funniest Tossed Off Implied Death Via Voiceover: Here Today
Funniest Movie: Barb & Star Go to Vista Del Mar
Funniest Villains: Those Who Wish Me Dead
Fun Until It’s Not: Prisoners of the Ghostland
Good Movie. Bad Ending: The Card Counter
Good Movie. Never Watching it Again: Zack Snyder’s Justice League
Goofiest: Halloween Kills
Hail Raatma: V/H/S/94
“Heartbreak Feels Good in A Place Like This”: No Time to Die
Hidden Gem: Finch
I Can’t Believe I Watched: Stallone: Frank, That Is
I Definitely Fell Asleep During: Black Widow
I Dunno…Recommended? Boris Karloff: The Man Behind the Monster
I Hate It: Fear Street Part 2: 1978
I Liked Some of It: Summer of Soul
I Mean, Whatever: Raya and the Last Dragon
I’m The Only Person Who Liked: Tom Clancy’s Without Remorse
I’m The Only Person Who Saw: Mainstream
Instant Energy: Michael Keaton, The Protege
It’s Aight: Black Friday (2021)
It’s Fine: Clerk
It’s Fine Until I Thought About It For 2 Seconds: Fear Street Part 1: 1994
I Weep for the Children: Tom & Jerry
Just the Absolute Worst: Cherry
Least Intimidating Villain: Spiral: From the Book of Saw
Like a Movie from 1998: Resident Evil: Welcome to Raccoon City
Like a Movie from 2007: Venom: Let There Be Carnage
Like a Movie on Sci Fi Channel from 2005: Chaos Walking
Like A TV Movie That Would Have Aired on Fox in 1992: Coming 2 America
Like Eating at Applebee’s when you Wanted to Eat at Chili’s: The Tomorrow War
Macho Nonsense: Boss Level
Made Me Feel Bad: Nobody
More Please: The Amusement Park
Most Affable: Together Together
Most Annoying: Malcolm & Marie
Most Boring: The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It
Most Clamoring for an MTV Movie Award Nomination for Best Villain: Jared Leto, The Little Things
Most Cinepocalypse: Superhost
Most Clenched Acting: Kristen Stewart, Spencer
Most Cringey: The Beta Test
Most Depressing Time Capsule: Locked Down
Most Directed: The Green Knight
Most Impressed with Itself: Copshop
Most John Malkovich in Rounders: House of Gucci
Most Marketing: In the Heights
Most Oscar Bait: Belfast
Most Overstuffed: Free Guy
Most Pleasant: Luca
Most Running: Licorice Pizza
Most Second City: Werewolves Within
Most Tribeca: The Projectionist
Most Underseen: The Last Duel
Movie I Like Less than Everyone Else: Dune (2021)
Movie I Like More than Everyone Else: Cruella
Not as Good as Love, Lights Hanukkah: Eight Gifts of Hanukkah
Not for Me: The Sparks Brothers
Nothing to Say: Kid 90
Oh Shit. I Kinda Liked: Cry Macho
Pleasant Surprise: Zola
Pretty Good: King Richard
Really Funny When It’s Unintentionally Funny: Boogie
Saddest: More Than Miyagi: The Pat Morita Story
Second Viewing Bump: Jakob’s Wife
So Bad It Should Be Against the Law: Fear Street Part 3: 1666
That’s the Ending? Army of the Dead
Ugh: Jungle Cruise
Unbearable: Home Sweet Home Alone
Wait, That Was This Year? Mortal Kombat (2021)
We All Have Problems, Bud: Billie Eilish The World’s A Little Blurry
Whatever: Hail to the Deadites
Worse Than Being Hospitalized: City of Lies
Worst Jewish Movie: The Vigil
Worst Movie: Space Jam: A New Legacy
Worst Reboot: Candyman
WTF: Malignant
Yikes: Don’t Breathe 2
You Can Stop at Any Time Now: F9: The Fast Saga
Brilliant. Legit Brilliant.
ReplyDeleteIm a sucker for year end lists and this one will be, hands down, my favorite. Thanks Riske...you rock.
Peace .n. Movies
It kinda feels like cheating having the Unbearable category as a second Worst Movie spot, but then I thought about it for 2 seconds and Mr.. Riske is absolutely 100% correct in this delineation.
ReplyDeleteAlways the best end-of-year list.
ReplyDeleteIf there was a best-list-of-the-year list, this one would be no.1
I loved this list! <3
ReplyDeleteOh and we get it, you weren't feeling the Fear Street movies. :P
I Hate It: Fear Street Part 2: 1978
ReplyDeleteI Liked Some of It: Summer of Soul
Hate is a strong word. I'd be interested to hear more.
SoS. Perfect summation.