Tuesday, December 14, 2021

The 2021 Binness Awards

 by Adam Riske

What award did your favorite movies get this year?

2020 Oscar Movies I Couldn’t See Until 2021 Power Ranking: 1) The United States vs. Billie Holiday, 2) Minari, 3) Judas and the Black Messiah, 4) Nomadland

Best Anthology: The French Dispatch

Best Cameo: Matt Damon, No Sudden Move

Best Community Theater Adaptation: The Many Saints of Newark

Best Documentary: Val 

Best Duo: Thomasin McKenzie and Anya Taylor-Joy, Last Night in Soho

Best Exasperated Facial Expressions: Rebecca Hall, The Night House

Best Jewish Movie: Shiva Baby

Best Netflix Movie: The Power of the Dog

Best Opening Sequence: A Quite Place Part II

Best Performance: Nicolas Cage, Pig

Better Than I Expected: Shadow in the Cloud 

Biggest Surprise: Wrath of Man being both Guy Ritchie and Jason Statham’s best movie

Blech: The Guilty (2021) 

Depressing: Woodstock 99: Peace, Love and Rage

Did I Hallucinate It? Old

Dumbest Shit Ever: Ghostbusters: Afterlife

Eh: Rocky IV: Rocky Vs. Drago
Enough Already: C’mon C’mon

First Movie Back in an Indoor Movie Theater: Godzilla vs. Kong 

Funny: PG: Psycho Goreman

Funniest Tossed Off Implied Death Via Voiceover: Here Today

Funniest Movie: Barb & Star Go to Vista Del Mar

Funniest Villains: Those Who Wish Me Dead

Fun Until It’s Not: Prisoners of the Ghostland

Good Movie. Bad Ending: The Card Counter

Good Movie. Never Watching it Again: Zack Snyder’s Justice League
Goofiest: Halloween Kills

Hail Raatma: V/H/S/94

“Heartbreak Feels Good in A Place Like This”: No Time to Die

Hidden Gem: Finch

I Can’t Believe I Watched: Stallone: Frank, That Is

I Definitely Fell Asleep During: Black Widow

I Dunno…Recommended? Boris Karloff: The Man Behind the Monster

I Hate It: Fear Street Part 2: 1978

I Liked Some of It: Summer of Soul 

I Mean, Whatever: Raya and the Last Dragon
I’m The Only Person Who Liked: Tom Clancy’s Without Remorse

I’m The Only Person Who Saw: Mainstream

Instant Energy: Michael Keaton, The Protege

It’s Aight: Black Friday (2021)

It’s Fine: Clerk

It’s Fine Until I Thought About It For 2 Seconds: Fear Street Part 1: 1994

I Weep for the Children: Tom & Jerry 

Just the Absolute Worst: Cherry

Least Intimidating Villain: Spiral: From the Book of Saw

Like a Movie from 1998: Resident Evil: Welcome to Raccoon City
Like a Movie from 2007: Venom: Let There Be Carnage

Like a Movie on Sci Fi Channel from 2005: Chaos Walking

Like A TV Movie That Would Have Aired on Fox in 1992: Coming 2 America

Like Eating at Applebee’s when you Wanted to Eat at Chili’s: The Tomorrow War 

Macho Nonsense: Boss Level

Made Me Feel Bad: Nobody 

More Please: The Amusement Park

Most Affable: Together Together

Most Annoying: Malcolm & Marie

Most Boring: The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It
Most Clamoring for an MTV Movie Award Nomination for Best Villain: Jared Leto, The Little Things

Most Cinepocalypse: Superhost

Most Clenched Acting: Kristen Stewart, Spencer 

Most Cringey: The Beta Test

Most Depressing Time Capsule: Locked Down

Most Directed: The Green Knight

Most Impressed with Itself: Copshop

Most John Malkovich in Rounders: House of Gucci

Most Marketing: In the Heights

Most Oscar Bait: Belfast
Most Overstuffed: Free Guy

Most Pleasant: Luca 

Most Running: Licorice Pizza

Most Second City: Werewolves Within

Most Tribeca: The Projectionist 

Most Underseen: The Last Duel

Movie I Like Less than Everyone Else: Dune (2021) 

Movie I Like More than Everyone Else: Cruella

Not as Good as Love, Lights Hanukkah: Eight Gifts of Hanukkah

Not for Me: The Sparks Brothers
Nothing to Say: Kid 90

Oh Shit. I Kinda Liked: Cry Macho

Pleasant Surprise: Zola 

Pretty Good: King Richard

Really Funny When It’s Unintentionally Funny: Boogie

Saddest: More Than Miyagi: The Pat Morita Story

Second Viewing Bump: Jakob’s Wife

So Bad It Should Be Against the Law: Fear Street Part 3: 1666 

That’s the Ending? Army of the Dead

Unbearable: Home Sweet Home Alone

Wait, That Was This Year? Mortal Kombat (2021)

We All Have Problems, Bud: Billie Eilish The World’s A Little Blurry

Whatever: Hail to the Deadites

Worse Than Being Hospitalized: City of Lies

Worst Jewish Movie: The Vigil

Worst Movie: Space Jam: A New Legacy

Worst Reboot: Candyman

Yikes: Don’t Breathe 2
You Can Stop at Any Time Now: F9: The Fast Saga


  1. Brilliant. Legit Brilliant.

    Im a sucker for year end lists and this one will be, hands down, my favorite. Thanks Riske...you rock.

    Peace .n. Movies

  2. It kinda feels like cheating having the Unbearable category as a second Worst Movie spot, but then I thought about it for 2 seconds and Mr.. Riske is absolutely 100% correct in this delineation.

  3. Always the best end-of-year list.

    If there was a best-list-of-the-year list, this one would be no.1

  4. I loved this list! <3

    Oh and we get it, you weren't feeling the Fear Street movies. :P

  5. I Hate It: Fear Street Part 2: 1978

    I Liked Some of It: Summer of Soul 

    Hate is a strong word. I'd be interested to hear more.

    SoS. Perfect summation.